Hogwarts Herald May 2018 Issue XXI
As the Seventh Years Graduate, The Staff of the Hogwarts Herald wanted to create a Goodbye Paper to them. You will be very much missed!!
Senior Superlatives
Compiled by Elaine Dridel, Victoire Weasley, and ShiShi Yang.
Voted on by You!
Best Broom: James Potter G, Baylie Havens R
Best Hair: Jason Ramirez S, Marian Prince S
Best Looking: Orion Black G, Victoire Weasley G
Best Smile: Ralph Davies R, Sarah Albright G
Biggest Flirt: Orion Black G, Christina Dingle G
Biggest Gossip: Jason Ramirez S, ShiShi Yang G
Biggest Party Animal: Travis Thicknesse H, Beatrice Crouch S
Biggest Prankster: James Potter G, Andi Burbanks S
Biggest Teacher's Pet: Dmiti Krum S, Lotus Woo H
Most Athletic: Murphy Finnigan G, Baylie Havens R
Most Friendly: Frank Weber R, Andi Burnsworth S
Most house spirited: Michael Paladoris H, Jasmine Zambini S
Most likely to become Minister of Magic: Farley Greengrass S, and Rachel Davies R
Most likely to get lost on the way to Charms: Donnie York H, Daisy Dursley H
Most likely to move to a foreign Country: David Lee H, Tanya La'Monte S
Most likely to return to Hogwarts as a teacher: Kendrick Wallace H, Vivian McKinnon R
Most Studious: Ted Lupin G, Dorina Marchbanks R
The Couple most likely to get married first: Sarah Albright and Frank Weber
The Couple that everyone knew would get together… eventually: Elaine Dridel and James Potter
The Couple that no one saw coming: Andi Burnsworth and Kendrick Wallace
The Cutest Couple: Elaine Dridel and James Potter
Top Ten Memories of the Class of 2018:
10. The hilariously violent and entertaining arguments between James Potter and Elaine Dridel.
9. Sorting and our First day of Hogwarts!
8. Winning a quidditch match!
7. Not having anymore NEWTs!
6. Seventh year Trick or Treating Haloween Prank and the April Fools Venice Prank! Go Marauders!!!! So basically any marauder Prank from the Sorting Hat Scavenger Hunt, the Burping Juice, the Escaped Paintings, April Fools Field Day, and the Polyjuice Potion Prank!!!!
5. Going to Hogsmeade!
4. Seventh year Masquerade Ball.
3. Spring Break Spectacular 2018!!!!
2. The Sixth Year Project!
1. All of the fantastic friendships we've formed over the years and the terrific teachers that taught us!
Top Ten Students of 2018
We interviewed and asked a few questions! See what they said to the five standard questions and the last personal question! Enjoy!Valedictorian: James Potter: Gryffindor Head Boy
Favorite Colors: Red and Gold and whatever color Ellie's eyes are at the moment
Favorite Class: Transfiguration
Favorite Teacher: AHH so HARD! Longbottom is an old family friend! Prewitt, you plus me plus detention equals fun, and Minnie, you're the best!
Aspiration: Auror
Role Model: Harry Potter, and not just cause he saved the wizarding world, he is also my dad- in case you didn't know
How Many Times Did Elaine Turn you down before she said yes?: I know it's surprising that someone could turn down this epitome of perfection once, but Ellie took it to a whole new level… er.. 246
Salutatorian: Elaine Dridel: Gryffindor Head Girl
Favorite Colors: Purple and Green
Favorite Class: Charms and Potions
Favorite Teacher: Flitwick
Aspiration: Healing because then I will be able to help people and work with all types of people
Role Model: Albus Dumbledore
What made you decide to give James Potter a chance?: I realized he was quite intelligent, not so pompous anymore, kind and responsible, funny, and how could I resist that Potter Charm much longer?
#3: Ted Lupin: Gryffindor Prefect
Favorite Colors: Turqouise, Yellow, and Blue
Favorite Class: Ancient Ruins
Favorite Teacher: Professor Longbottom because he has taught me so much more than Herbology
Aspiration: Work for Gringots
Role Model: My father, Remus Lupin, because he had to deal with being a werewolf and a good person.
What is your Boggart?: That information is classified, and I cannot disclose that at this time, because if I were to tell you, then I would have to kill you, and that would be quite unfortunate, and since I wish that the readers of this paper retain their lives, I shall not tell you.
#4:Farley Greengrass: Slytherin Prefect
Favorite Color: Green (DUH)
Favorite Class: History of Magic (SO I CAN CATCH UP ON MY SLEEP)
Favorite Teacher: Binns (see above)
Aspiration: to become an Order of Merlin First Class, but I'd settle for Minister of Magic
Role Model: Albus Dumbledore
Will there be another appearance of the Pink Whales Quidditch Team?: Merlin NO, Andi is bloody crazy! And did James put you up to this because he tried to claim I was captain, but for the record, I wasn't.
#5: Dorina Marchbanks: Ravenclaw Prefect
Favorite Color: Magenta
Favorite class: Ancient Ruins
Favorite Teacher: Professor Flitwick
Aspiration: To fix the department of transportation so the floo network won't go down every other week anymore… honestly… it's getting quite ridiculous.
Role Model: My grandma Griselda
Since your grandmother is on the NEWT testing board, do you think this will influence your grades?; Absolutely not, that would be highly unethical!
#6: Justin Wilkes: Ravenclaw Prefect
Favorite Color: Blue
Favorite Class: Muggle Studdies
Favorite Teacher: Mrs. Smith (Muggle Studdies)
Aspiration: To work in either muggle Relations or the Department of the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts and succeed Arthur Weasley as Department Head
Role Model: Arthur Weasley
What is your ideal birthday present?: Anything muggle related really, last I got some batteries and a plug which I really enjoyed but my dream gift is a blender
#7: Victoire Weasley: Gryffindor Prefect
Favorite Color: Orange, because I always wanted Red hair… so I wasn't the only frickin blond in the Weasley Family!
Favorite Class: Ancient Ruins and Herbology
Favorite Teacher: Professor Longbottom! BEST HEAD OF HOUSE-EVAH!!
Role Model: My grandma Weasley! She can cook the best meal imaginable, raise seven children to all be successful and good people, loves everyone with all her heart, and is still one kick ass witch!
Aspiration: To become a healer at St. Mungos and then also raise a family and be a great mum!
Thing that will miss most about Hogwarts: Since I'll still be living with some of my friends and working with them at Healer training, I would have to say all the craziness that occurs every day! And the food!
#8: Andromeda Burnsworth: Slytherin
Favorite Color: Pink, everything in the world should be pink. Right Orion?
Favorite Class: Charms
Favorite Teacher: Although I never took Muggle Studdies, I heard Professor Smith wears a pink hat!
Role Model: I heard from some muggleborns that there was this muggle rock star named Pink, that's just so cool! So her!
Aspiration: To found the Pink Whales Quidditch Team… Oh FARLEY! Guess Who I'm nominating Captain!?
Why did you convince the Sorting Hat to let you into slytherin because you don't seem to belong there?: I just figured that green was a runner up to pink! When my children get to Hogwarts, there better be a fifth house, and the house color better be PINK! The Pink Whale will be it's mascott! Go WHALES!!!
#9: Orion Black: Gryffindor
Favorite Color: First of all, I would like to express my amazement that I even got to this position at all. Obviously I tried too hard. But not as hard as James. I really think he was just trying to prove himself worthy of a one Miss Elaine Lovy Tamora Dridel. Don't believe he is worthy because Ellie will one day realize she loves me and that James is a second rate loser and not as funny as me, the Wonderous Orion Alphard Black (I know we don't get to choose our own middle names so let's not hold this against the most marvelous looking guy in the grade) whose favorite color so happens to be… fanfare… Firewhiskey amber.
Favorite Class: I have just observed what Andi Burnsworth has written about me above and would like to inform the reader that Pink should be outlawed from the face of the planet! In fact, I think it should die. And Basically that pink Tent in the sixth year village, should be burned down, and then eaten by a thesral, pooped out and then force fed to Albus Potter who recently gave me a detention, stupid fifth year prefects, okay, just kidding Albie, I LOVE YOU… Happy Teddy? I'm making an effort! Back to the original question… No one has a favorite class and anyone who tells you any different is trying to feed you a load of crap… just like Albie…. Haha… honestly, who goes to Hogwarts other than to snog? who heard of classes? But, if I had to choose a favorite it would be Lunch… What? You say that doesn't count? It does now cause I got an O in it, and I say it counts! I'm ninth in the class, so I'm most likely smarter than you and therefore am right.
Favorite Teacher: I would also like to point out here that Andi is an idiot who doesn't deserve the spot above me. Come to think of it, no one does… But, in any case, it is entirely illogical to base your favorite teacher on if that person wears a pink hat… especially if you have never even had them in class.. that is a violation of the question! I don't have a favorite teacher because they all give me homework and detentions.. that sucks… I LOVE YOU MINNIE! I would have picked you if you were a teacher… you should have never gone for Headmistress… However I can say you are my favorite Headmistress.. ohh you are also my only headmistress.. but no matter!
Role Model: Why would I pick someone as a role model who obviously has flaws? Therefore, my role model is the most perfect wonderful amazing, (insert infinite number of positive adjectives here) person on the planet which would have to be ME! ORION BLACK! I'm already perfect, so why do I need some other person as my role model. I should be other people's role model! Honestly! Okay so this interviewer person who shall not be named (SHISHI YOU SUCK) says I must name someone other than myself… okay so since I am basically the reincarnate of my grandfather Sirius Black, according to my grandmother anyways, I'll pick him, because that's basically me! So ha! It's still me! Suck it ShiShi!
Aspiration: I want to be an auror. The End. Not really, did you honestly think it would be that simple or easy? Let's talk about numero ocho who shall be once again be trounced in her answer and proven that I, not her deserve the spot of number 8. The Pink Whales? WHAT THE BLOODY FUCK!? First of all, no one will ever ever ever ever allow you to name a quidditch team the pink whales! No guys will play for you because pink is effeminate and they will not want to wear it, and second of all, no girl wants to be called a whale… except you.. and you are one! Okay, that was a little mean... sorry.. you're actually quite thin, but I'm on a rant right now...
How Many Detentions have you actually had?: I am proud to announce that I, Orion Alphard Black, have set the detention record. I beat out my grandfather, Sirius Orion Black class of 77 by 12.5 detentions. I do not know how he got a .5 detention but I will admit I am jealous. I have been given 679 detentions, and I have served 670 while my children will be serving the remaining nine. Perhaps I should not send them to Hogwarts and avoid that all together. This brings about the next topic… the topic of a fifth house! THAT WILL NEVER HAPPEN! At least how Andi proposes it. It shall be called the Padfood House, and the colors shall be black and black, and the symbol shall be a big black dog! It will never be the Pink Whale house! Honestly… Of all the ridiculous ideas… A PINK HOUSE COLOR! OMM!! OH MY MERLIN! OBVIOUSLY I SHOULD BE NUMBER 8! Thank you for reading, have a nice life.
#10: Frank Weber: Ravenclaw
Favorite Color: Blue
Favorite Class: Well I did get Sarah to notice me in divination
Favorite Teacher: Professor Jones (Defense)
Role Model: My dad
Aspiration: To be an auror and to marry Sarah Albright.
While at school, while you have been dating Sarah, what has been the longest separation period?: Well, obviously the time it takes for me to walk from the Gryffindor Girls staircase to the Ravenclaw common room and then my dorm where I sleep and the to sleep, wake up in the morning, and get to the Gryffindor common room where I take her to breakfast at 8:00. Since I usually drop her off around.. well since curfew is at Ten and for the purpose of this interview we will assume I make it back to the ravenclaw common room by ten and it takes 8 minutes and 36 seconds to get from the Gryffindor to the Ravenclaw common rooms, we have been apart for 10 hours, 8 minutes, and thirty six seconds max. (But really consider if I made it to the common room by curfew)
Letter from the Editor Elaine Dridel
This is our paper's last issue as the writers will be graduating. We will forever remember this paper and appreciate our readers who made it possible. If any younger years are interested in continuing the paper next year, please contact me, Elaine Dridel. I can give you all of the things necessary to continue the Herald.
On a side note, the opinions expressed by the top ten do are not necessarily shared by the writers of this paper and should be taken as personal statements. This paper is not repsonsible for the language or content of their interviews as they pointed out, editing them would be "unjust censorship of their unalienable rights to freedom of speech, freedom to bash others, freedom to be gramatically incorrect, freedom to curse, freedom to write 'haha', and freedom of generally being Orion Black."
Thank you! Elaine Dridel, Editor in Chief.
I really wanted to write this issue of the Hogwarts Herald. I can write the issues in between at a later date if I want. But for now, I thought it would be nice to have the first and last issues of the Herald. I said they had about one a month from the October of their fifth year on. If I ever have time I'll write the nineteen or so issues in between but I hope this was funny and please review. The other issues I make will follow the format of the first issue and be inserted in between this and the first issue. Thanks!!! Please review if you want more!!! I'll be finishing Marauders Class of 2018 soon and be posting that and the first chapter of My heart forever lies in london soon!!
Elaine