This narrative was molded around the short story I recently posted in my other fanfic 'Elegant, Graceful, and Clumsy'.Because of a recent fic posting by fellow author Merk (you may know her as Mrs. Mercury Megatron, now calling herself PointyEdgesofaSign), I was compelled to draft a similar set of quickie-shorts based on ten randomly shuffled songs. More details on how it works can be found on her set of shorts in '10 Typos for Awerewolf'.
The inspiration for this one story in particular was a song performed by Chicago by the name 'Hard Habit To Break'
Important Note to Readers:We continue to focus on our favorite Tiger Master as she wrestles with the reality that Po may never come back.. As she slips further into depression, she begins to feel that the only respite from her pain and loneliness is in deep in her thoughts, where Po remains only as a vivid apparition of her imagination. Pushing everyone else in her life away, it seems that nothing can bring her from mulling through the past..
Which brings us here now, and with the previous struggles in mind we now continue...
And special thanks go out to all of my readers and reviewers! Great feedback so far, I love the comments.. So be kind and review!!
Hard Habit To Break
Part Four – Remember the Feeling
--
Tigress spent a good while sitting perched at the small plateau.
She listened intently to the soft summer breeze, rustling through the brilliantly colored pink and golden pedals of the blossoming peach tree.
The faintest scent of lavender, carried up the mountain by the wind from the foothills below, seemed to cleanse the tortured feline's soul.. It was days like these that she could clear her subconscious of the pain and emptiness she felt every day of her life. Slowly but surely, she entered a relaxed meditative state, channeling all of her thoughts into the back of her psyche and letting them pass calmly into acquiescence.
And there she sat, quietly and peacefully, without so much as a passing thought..
Meditation was still her most enjoyed activity amongst her other mundane activities. Lately she had spent most of her time this way instead of training. Master Shifu had silently protested this behavior, but knew Tigress needed her space. She was his best student, and if there was any way to hone your skills more powerfully than training, it was meditatively.
And as much as Shifu hated to admit it, Tai Lung had proved that to be true..
Shifu watched her off in the distance from the pavilion, a fleeting smile on his face.
He was proud of her for handling the situation as best she could, but was also fearful that Tigress would never be able to move on from the past. He had seen this coming; she soon chose to eat alone in her bedroom, refused to train or spar with the other Masters, and only spoke with Mr. Ping directly. Everything else in her existence seemed to fade away.
The red panda sighed, he wished that everything could just return to the status quo..
But that simply wasn't the case.
Once one solitary threat emerged, no matter how small, Tigress would focus all of her time and energy preparing for it. She trained her entire life to prove to herself and Master Shifu that she was capable of defeating Tai Lung. And once he was no longer a danger to the Valley, Po became her immediate concern. Even in the days and weeks before either Po or Tigress had developed feelings for each other, she was intently focused on him.
That somehow by helping him, she was also able to help herself.
Shifu sighed; he could blame himself for that, and he did…never once did he tell her how much he cared. That, despite that he seemed cold and distant, he only wanted to do it to protect her. Maybe he had gone a bit overboard, but this was the only way to stop himself from making the same mistake. Po had given her the closure she had needed. In that respect, it made perfect sense to him.
Tigress would always be the first one to correct his stance, eagerly volunteer to spar with him, among other things. Those two had over time become inseparable; it was no wonder why her life fell apart once he left. She never failed to make an impact on the small Master in some way, never once…
With a heavy breath, the dark shadows of the Jade Palace's wide gabled roof engulfed him as he slowly turned away and retreated back onto the pavilion to observe his other students, who had continued to train despite Tigress' absence.
Meanwhile, the feline sat in a relaxed posture, drawing long breaths, bringing her to a state of total mental and physical harmony. Taking a moment to find her center of peace, she focused on the scenery around her, noting the sounds and the smells while keeping her eyes tightly shut. And then.. a burst of inner peace washed over her.
A reminiscence of a happier time that she had completely blocked out made its way to her full attention…
"Where are we going Tigress?"
"Don't worry Po, we're almost there."
The Dragon Warrior shot her another sharp glance. He wasn't one to keep secrets, and never enjoyed it when others did the same, especially when it involved wasting his time to trek across a mountain pass to an unnamed location—when he could be back at the Jade Palace having dinner.
Master Shifu had suggested a more rugged path to the Pool of Sacred Tears, the place at which Tigress would teach Po some fundamental meditation techniques.
The purpose of this journey was to hone Po's focus on Kung-Fu through meditative exercises, a process which would prove to be a very difficult one. Po could never sit still for more than two minutes; he had the explosive energy of a child and the tenacity of a well-seasoned warrior.. The panda already proved himself in his ability to not only master baser Kung-Fu techniques in a matter of two days, but also to defeat an opponent who had trained almost thirty-five years his major.
Yes, he truly was a formidable combatant, if only there was someone to unlock that incredible potential. Master Shifu, through numerous attempts, had tried to do just that, but ultimately failed. It seemed that the original motivational object for Po had begun to fade out of the Panda's consciousness: Food.
Shifu was to be the one to take Po on this outing, but at the last moment realized that there was only one individual truly suited for this new training regimen. Tigress had been the only one of his students to ever master every technique in self-reflection. While the others never spent a lot of time this way, she used every chance she got to her advantage.
So there they were, at the last possible second..
And when Tigress was chosen to be his guardian, Po was still left in the dark as to where it was that they were going. Shifu insisted that it was of no importance, and that what truly mattered was the task at hand. Quickly they were shooed on their way, bringing them here…
"Come on Tigress.. Can't we rest a minute? I'm exhausted." The Dragon Warrior belted out between heavy pants, ultimately tripping on a small pebble, bringing him crashing to the ground.
"Owww…"
Tigress merely smiled at him as she reached out for his paw, pulling the clumsy panda back onto his feet, only for him to collapse backwards on his hindquarters. Tigress chuckled at his stupidity. She thought it was absolutely adorable.
"We're never going to get there if you keep falling all over yourself."
He laughed, "Yeah I know.. A little help?"
Again, she helped him up. "Now let's go, before we waste any more time—"The female tiger couldn't complete that sentence, however, because Po, in all of his unbounded glory had fallen forwards this time, landing right on top of her.
Tigress struggled to get out from under the immense weight of the giant panda, but stopped when she realized what kind of position she was in. Now pinned to the ground, she snapped open her eyes and was instantly met with Po's round face, staring blankly at the stunned feline. The tigress dropped her eyes—
His paw was grasping her tail, which to her surprise, had neatly curled around his arm.
She could feel her heart beating wildly against her chest, ready to burst.. Neither of them had this close of an encounter before, and even though they were both extremely uncomfortable—with red faces to match—neither of them made any attempt to rectify the situation.
"Po?" She asked in a whisper.
In all honesty, Tigress wanted to beat the living daylights out of him for falling on her, but there was something about him that she just couldn't figure out.. For one thing, she never noticed how soft his fur was..
Or what a perfect smile he had…
And how his eyes seemed to glisten in the evening sun like emeralds…
His eyes—oh, those eyes... All she could do was stare back into those stunning jade green orbs, feeling calmed and entranced like she never had been before in her life.
"I'm sorry Tigress, should I get off?" Was the only stupid thing to pop out of Po's mouth. The poor fellow was still lost in a daze..
She only returned a vacant stare as she lifted her head up to his, "No."
The feline wrapped her arms around his neck, and without so much as a passing thought, she kissed him. Her breath caught in her chest the instant she felt her lips touch his. It was such an incredible sensation. She truly had no idea of just how wonderful—or how... unbelievably magnificent—a kiss like this one could be. As seconds turned to moments, she could feel Po's arms slowly wrapping around her…first to support her, then to pull her closer against him. Their eyes slid closed…and a soft purr broke the blissful silence between the two.
Slowly pulling her lips away from him, she dropped her head back to the ground, and shyly looked up at him. She didn't make any attempt to hide the entranced look that had now fallen across her features. Her firey red eyes connected to his, and she silently searched them, seeking the approval she so desperately wanted…
And for just a fleeting moment, Po held a look of pure wonder on his face… but sure enough, it melted into a warm grin as he pulled the feline into a tight hug. She sighed.. his embrace was strong, yet somehow comforting at the same time. He pressed a kiss to her neck, and Tigress felt a soft purr rise from her chest, madly giggling at the sensation of his soft lips traveling over her fur. She wanted to tell him. She just had to tell him—
"I love you." He murmured.
He loved her. Her face burned with embarrassment as she ran a finger down his cheek. She could feel his warm breath on her face while his lips lingered over hers, waiting patiently as if they sought her permission.
Gently placing her paws against his chest and pressing her nose to his, she whispered, "Where have you been all my life?" She felt his paw run up to her ear, and purred like a kitten when he started to scratch it.
Po smiled, "…waiting for you."
Without another word, he pressed his lips to hers, and they shared another kiss for what felt to them like an eternity. She closed her eyes, taking immense pleasure in the company of her newfound soul mate. Is this what love was? It exceeded any of her wildest anticipations, and she was able to express all of those suppressed emotions with just one simple act.
And while she relaxed into the kiss, she sighed internally—this couldn't be the same Po she remembered; the Po she knew was overly-energetic, witty.. even a little bit immature at times… much like a kid trapped in an adult's body. But something about him was different now, as if he took on an entirely new aura in a matter of a split second.
He was charming, entrancing.. and, dare she say, captivatingly romantic. And it worked. He had snared her heart, because she loved him. She loved him with a power that even she couldn't even fully comprehend...and after he pulled away, Tigress gazed up at him with a look of undying affection. She was deeply in love with this panda, and all it had taken was one stupid accident to make her realize it.
In just a moment, one kiss changed everything…
Tigress broke out of her trance trembling, and wildly scanned the landscape around her.
The sun had by this time crept towards the distant mountains, darkening the skies above to a brilliant hue of dark red. The tingling sensation from the visualization of her and Po's first kiss remained on the Tiger Master's lips. She put a paw up to her face to cover her mouth..
The feline's face was red-hot. It felt so real, and she silently wished that it had been.
Tigress' vivid memories were becoming more and more of a reality for the young feline, which could only mean that..
She was spending entirely too much time thinking about him.
Was her definition of actuality versus fantasy beginning to meld together? Even then, it seemed that the only time Tigress was truly at peace, when she felt happy—was in her dreams, where her imagination could run away to the far corners of the world and bring Po along with it.
And that is where she wanted to be; and that place that existed in her mind..
Was wherever he was.
The female tiger stood up once the sun had faded away from her sight, giving the Moon more prominence as it slowly slid into the heavens, casting its silvery glow upon the Valley of Peace; the twinkling lights of the village visible far off in the evening mist. She walked towards the dormitories, until a low rumbling sound rang through the tiger's ears.. she still hadn't eaten since yesterday evening. With a heavy sigh, she made a detour and began ascending the steps to the kitchen building, where soft voices and scattered laughter could be heard wafting through the open windows of the brightly lit wooden structure.
Tigress discerned the owners of the voices penetrating the night air. It sounded as if Mr. Ping was telling another one of his stories…
"…So I told Mrs. Hu that her money was no good there."
Crane laughed, removing his straw hat before taking his place at the table, "Really? How did that go over with her?"
"Yes, she can be quite a handful from what I've heard." This was the voice of Master Shifu.
"Well," The goose began, chopping up several chives. "She took her empty soup bowl and chucked it at me, only her aim was a bit off, hitting Po right in the noggin!" He joked, tapping a wooden spoon against his head.
Everyone in the room began laughing hysterically, only to be prematurely silenced by the appearance of Tigress standing in the doorframe. Looking at her with wide eyes, they watched silently as she took a seat in her usual place, only she hadn't dined with them in almost fourteen months. The only individual brave enough to say something was Mr. Ping.
"Ah Tigress, how nice of you to join us.. You want the usual, I take it?"
She quietly nodded, tossing him a grateful smile. Another moment of awkward silence permeated the room, until Viper finally mustered up enough courage to attempt to speak with the feline master.
"So, uh.. Tigress… How are things?" If she had fingers she would have pinched the bridge of her nose; Viper couldn't believe how unbelievably stupid that sounded. The others looked on in curiosity, wondering if she would in fact answer or not.
The feline returned a menacing glare, "Fine." Her crimson eyes darted back down towards the floor. Nobody else dared to say anything further, lest they wanted to feel the brunt end of Tigress' rage.
Mr. Ping waddled over to the table and handed her the usual request: sautéed tofu. Giving him a quick 'thank you' she stood up from her seat, and walked back out through the doorframe, disappearing just as instantly as she had come, more than likely to her bedroom. It was the only other place besides the Peach Tree that she would spend her nights.
"Poor child.." Mr. Ping said softly, sitting down next to where the heartbroken tiger had been just moments before, "I can only imagine what she must be feeling right now."
Mantis nodded, "Yeah, she just hasn't been the same since… Well, you know."
Shifu agreed with the praying mantis, "Yes. We all must be strong for her and trust that in time, she will get over her pain. But until then, I want you all to keep a watchful eye on her. I don't need another one of my students leaving the Jade Palace without a trace."
"Do you think there's a chance that Po will ever return, Master?" Viper asked, her eyes never once faltering from the troubled red panda's face.
"I… I don't know."
Tigress returned to her room, setting her dinner plate on a small table, and plopped down onto her bedroll.
She looked out into the hallway at Po's bedroom door..
From the day she found out that Po had left, the feline vowed never to set foot in there again.. After all, that was the place where they shared their first, and last, moments together. So many good yet painful memories washed over her every time she gazed upon that simple wood and paper door..
After several quiet moments, the feline got back on her feet, making her way slowly to the door across the narrow corridor. Contradicting herself, she opened the double doors into the panda's former sleeping quarters, taking a split second to make sure she was alone before she proceeded in.
Coming to a halt once she reached his bedroll, Tigress opened a small drawer on his bedside table, where he kept only one item of interest: a statuette of himself, carved from basswood that he had purchased from a village craft shop. After he had defeated Tai Lung, craft makers had begun producing wooden figurines of the Dragon Warrior, just like the ones Po had collected of the Furious Five and kept back at Mr. Ping's shop.
She picked it up, taking a moment to scan over its intricately carved features..
Even if it wasn't the real thing, it was the closest article she had of a physical likeness of the missing panda. And this time, Tigress brought it with her. Closing his door and re-entering her own quarters, she delicately placed the figure on her nightstand, next to the scroll Master Shifu had given her.
In the candlelight, Tigress studied it…
His form, the gentle curves of his round stomach, down to the very detail of the jade green irises that had been so carefully painted onto the small wooden doll. She rubbed her thumb down the side of it's face, as if by some small drop of hope, she could imagine it was him. The air was so silent and still, she felt tears well up in her eyes once again. Tigress whispered to the lifeless object, "Po, where are you?"
…and gradually cried herself to sleep.
To be continued…