Title: Life Goes On

Author: innocent choir girl (ff-dot-net), shannyfish (From Out of the Lab/Miami Heat/LJ)

Summary: Third in the "American Family Series" (which consists so far of "Two Lives" and "Love's Burden"). While planning the wedding, Suzie returns and trouble ensues because of it…not only over Madison, but over the life that Horatio wants to give her and what he fully intends on following through with.

Category: Ship Ahoy! Calleigh/Horatio

Genres: Angst, Character Study, Drama, Established Relationship, Romance, Suspense

Characters: Horatio Caine, Calleigh Duquesne, Yelina Salas, Alexx Woods, Frank Tripp, Eric Delko, Original Character, Other

Warnings: Adult Themes

Rating: R

Chapter: 6 "You're Not Pushing"

Author's Notes: Okay, so I got on a roll with this story today… It's going to end up having probably 15 chapters… It's planned through chapter 10 at the moment ;)

……………………………………

The blue eyes of the baby doll stared back at Calleigh. It was Emma's, one she had gotten for her birthday, but Calleigh had borrowed it. It had blonde hair, way too much for such a small doll as far as Calleigh was concerned. The head and limbs were made of soft plastic and the body was soft with beans. She had it lying on her chest as she lay in bed. It reminded her of when Emma was that small… Though, the doll was in a fancy pink lacy dress, and Calleigh knew that Emma had never been in something so pretty when she had been small. She wished that she could share those moments with Horatio, but those moments were gone…and she could never have them back…

"What are you doing?" Horatio asked from the doorway. He knew that they didn't have a little one, so he assumed it was a toy of some kind. He walked further into the bedroom and found that he was correct, it was a doll.

"Thinkin'," Calleigh responded a small smile coming to her lips as she looked up at Horatio.

Smiling, Horatio lay down next to her and slid his arm under her neck. He pulled her close, but didn't topple the doll. "Isn't that Emma's?" Horatio asked quietly before kissing her cheek.

"I was just thinking…" Calleigh started. "You never got to see Emma when she was this small," she whispered. "You didn't get anything that you should have been able to experience…"

"None of that matters now," Horatio insisted as he turned her to him, letting the doll slip in between of them as his lips found hers. "I have you and our beautiful daughter…and soon Madison will be part of our family officially…"

Calleigh let her head rest in the crook of his neck, she breathed into his neck before speaking after a minute of silence. "Do you ever think about having another baby?" she asked lying there in his arms.

A baby…

He'd thought about how if he and Calleigh had anymore about how beautiful they'd be, but he knew that Calleigh was healing… They'd already come a long way, and he didn't see any point in pressuring her into anything. "I am happy with our beautiful Emma..." Horatio told her sincerely. "You don't know how happy it's made me to have her…even if I missed things, Sweetheart."

"But you want a boy," Calleigh said as she lifted her head so that their eyes met. "All guys want a little boy to be just like them…" she explained. "Though…do we really want our kids to be CSIs, like us?"

He smiled, "I think that our kids will be great…at whatever they want to be… Beautiful, intelligent children…"

Calleigh smirked and giggled at a thought, "And probably pretty damn good shots…"

"I want you to be completely sure that you're ready before we take that step, Calleigh…" Horatio told her as his hand came up and gently stroked her golden hair. He loved how beautiful her eyes were…they were sparkling and bright…and he knew that thinking about their future children. He could tell that she was excited about that aspect, but he wanted to make sure that they were taking the right steps at the right time. "I love you, you know that…" he whispered.

"I love you, too," she said with a smile. "I promise, I'm ready, though…"

Horatio let his hand run up the back of her shirt, his skin touching her bare skin. "Not yet… I want things to be perfect…and absolutely special for that time…" He'd waited nearly four years…he could wait a bit longer.

"Our weddin' night…" Calleigh whispered.

Their wedding…

It was only a couple months off now…but he knew that if Calleigh thought she was ready now, she would be completely sure by then. "I think that's a very good plan," Horatio said finally quietly and ran his finger along her cheek. Though he wanted to wait before they made love, he knew that there were steps in between that needed to be taken. They'd changed in the same room, but they'd never been completely bare in front of each other. That comfort was something that they'd need to work on…and he had an idea on how to do it. "I…was thinking about getting into the shower…do you want to come with me?" he asked with a small smile as his finger stroked the soft skin of her cheek.

Calleigh looked back at him a bit shocked, and she was sure that her face betrayed her with that emotion, but she hadn't expected Horatio to offer something like that. She knew what he would say…that he didn't want to push, that she didn't have to, that it was okay…but she was tired of him making excuses for her. She already felt bad enough, and she knew that showering was something that she could handle…even if it involved sharing it. "I…I think I can handle that…" she whispered, her voice giving away a bit of hesitation.

She was determined to do it, however, and when she saw his mouth open; her finger zoomed to cover it. "Shhh…let me do this, Handsome…" Calleigh smiled, "I'm alright, I promise…" She pulled away after giving him a brief kiss. "Hurry up," she teased as she headed for the bathroom, picking up her robe as she went.

Getting to the bathroom first, she started the water, making sure that it was warm, but not scalding hot. She reached up and back, pulling the elastic that had secured her ponytail for the day and setting it on the sink. She started to unbutton her jeans, and noticed that Horatio had joined her in the bathroom. "Takin' your time, Handsome?" she teased lightly as she shimmied out of her jeans and panties, letting them pool at her feet before stepping out of them and bending down to pick them up. She placed them in the clothes hamper before removing her blouse and her bra. Her face blushed a bit knowing that Horatio was behind her. She heard his clothes hit the hamper before the rest of her clothes joined his.

Calleigh was in the shower first, and she took the opportunity to shampoo and condition her hair. It was really nice to feel the warm water hitting her skin. It was relaxing more than anything. She heard the shower door opening as she rinsed the conditioner from her hair. "Hey," she greeted a bit shyly as she faced him.

"Hi," he greeted back as he let his hand gently slide down her bare side. "You're beautiful, you know that…" he whispered looking her over fully. She had gained some weight, but it had been hardly anything, and she still looked perfect.

Calleigh giggled a bit feeling that the awkwardness was just absolutely absurd. She closed the distance between them and wrapped her arms around them, feeling their skin melting together. He felt so wonderful against him. She let her head rest against his chest and just took the time to enjoy it. "I love you…"

…………………………….

Their shower had lasted for sometime, and Horatio had been a tad disappointed when the water had become icy cold. He had missed simple things like skin touching skin…their bodies pressed together…but he knew that it was something that they would be doing more often. Calleigh had fallen asleep in her robe, but Horatio wasn't ready to sleep. He reached around her and pulled her closer to him, so that her back was against his chest. His hand settled on her abdomen and thought about a baby… It was such a big decision to make, but he knew that when it was truly time, then Calleigh would get pregnant…

He knew that this time there wasn't going to be anyone who would be able to get in the way of him being there with Calleigh for this child… He'd be there for every second of the pregnancy and could go to every doctor's appointment. He'd see the ultrasound and go through the steps to get ready for the new baby. It was going to be a new experience, but something that he was excited about. The New Year was going to bring him more than he had ever dreamed of…

……………………………..

TBC…