Ah, chapter two, how I love thee…Oh, and I own nothing of J.K. Rowling's. And this chapter may be a little inappropriate for some people, just suggestive discussion amongst the characters. Just thought I should clear that up. We also have Remus' point of view in this chapter…

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Chapter Two: The Color of Pink, and the First Attempt

Our heroes exited the Gryffindor common room, and made their way down the deserted hallway.

"You see, my friend, we're going to play 'Pin the Tail on the Moony.'"

Sirius smiled. "I like it. Slightly embarrassing, yet endearing at the same time. No bodily harm rendered, just a bit of emotional trauma, right? Challenging. Unappealing, yet charming. Well, hopefully. Just one question, Prongs. Where in the world are we going to get a lovely, furry tail for our lovely, furry Moony?"

They stopped walking.

"That's a good question," James acknowledged, pointing a finger at Sirius. "You are quite skilled at transfiguration, are you not?"

"McGonagall never says so, but it's true. I can see it in her eyes. I really do quite amaze myself when it comes to transfiguration. I just hate the paperwork."

"See, all we need to figure out is how to transfigure a life-like tail onto a human. In one swift motion, and without him noticing."

"And we're going to do this--how?"

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Later that evening in the secrecy of the Library (a place where no one would think to look for Padfoot and Prongs), they researched transfiguration and created the sacred document of regulations to follow:

Instructions for Pin the Tail

By Messrs. Padfoot and Prongs

1. Subject must never have acknowledgement of the game before the goal is achieved.

2. If needed, the players of the game may resort to drastic moves to obtain the subject, as long as the circumstances do not conflict with the first rule.

James looked up from the paper they had been hunched over. "Drastic moves? Padfoot, just what kind of drastic moves are you talking about?"

"Look at it this way," Sirius said, "would a player be willing to be bodily harmed for the sake of the game?"

"Most definitely."

"And there you have rule number two."

Contented, James looked down again to read the rest of the list.

3. As soon as the subject is in range, a blinding and dizzying state must take place within the player until the attempt is aborted or achieved.

4. Use of the Map in order to obtain the subject results in disqualification.

5. If anyone in authority is to discover the true nature of the game, it is ended immediately.

6. The game must only be played in daylight.

7. The game must only be played once in each of the players' lifetimes.

"But what are the consequences for playing the game more than once?" asked James.

"Hmm.." Sirius took his quill and scribbled down an addition to the rule.

7. The game must only be played once in each of the players' lifetimes, or said player will never be able to wear or obtain the colour pink for the rest of his or her life.

"Padfoot, isn't that kind of a blessing?"

"Some would say that."

"All right…Well, these seven rules should be enough, don't you think?"

"Yeah," he yawned, "It's late…and libraries start to scare me after a while. I think the books hate me."

They traipsed upstairs to the dorms to find Remus and Peter sleeping soundly. Shadows stretched across the walls in the silence of the room as they tiptoed in for a short night of sleep. As they both crawled into their beds, they took a look at Remus.

"This should be very interesting," Sirius whispered. "Are you sure it will be fun?"

"Just you wait. Once that blindness and dizziness come 'round, it'll be challenging. We just have to make sure not to hit other innocent people."

"And there's no guarantee of that."

James thought for a moment, peering at Remus. Then he turned back to Sirius. "It really is a complete waste of time, isn't it?"

"True. But you know what they say…the bigger the waste of time, the more fun that is had."

"Do they really say that?"

"I don't know, I just made it up."

"Well I like the way you think anyhow. Just think, tomorrow it begins, you and me; best friends pitted against each other in order to obtain the goal…a goal that is both embarrassing and entrancing."

"Deadly and delightful."

"Deadly?"

"All right, maybe not deadly."

They both stole one last glance at Remus sleeping peacefully beneath the warm blankets, so innocently unaware of the chaos that was to come.

"Sleep peacefully my little friend." Sirius whispered melodramatically. "For it will be the last night of peaceful sleep that you will know."

James merely rolled his eyes and Peter snored.

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Remus slipped into consciousness early in the morning, the first of soft blue daylight breaking in through the curtains. There was an annoying bird twittering outside the window. He shut his drowsy eyes again and shifted further beneath the covers, having great desire for Monday mornings to be nonexistent. His bed was unusually soft on this particular Monday, and he could already hear bits and pieces of muffled laughter he assumed was coming from his friends. He sighed and curled up against the warm weight in his bed. Hold on. Warm weight? His eyes snapped open and he flung the covers back to reveal what seemed to be a very disoriented Sirius Black.

"Moony, is that you?" he said, grasping at the air.

"You're damn right it's me, you're in my bed. How long have you been here?"

"Um...I…don't know." Which was answered by feet shoving him onto the hard floor, creating what Remus thought was a very satisfying thud.

"Padfoot, do me a favor and keep your dirty paws off my bed. Forever." Remus said, now thoroughly irritated. "I get enough of you during the day as it is. Why were you over here, anyway?"

"I was…er…lost." he answered. He was now groping the floor and scooting himself along the rug until his hands found the bedpost. Pulling himself to standing position, he stretched his hand out into the air, halting slightly as he let go of the post.

"Sirius, go back to sleep. It's five-thirty in the morning! And stay away from my bed."

The other boy sighed deeply, arms still stretched out into the air. As he took another step, he almost completely lost his balance and began to look a bit nauseated. "I thought he said pleasantly disoriented…" he mumbled.

"What?" Remus eyed him questioningly.

"Nothing. I'm going, I'm going." he stumbled back to his bed and flopped onto the comforter with a look of pain still evident on his face. Remus shook his head. There was never a time that his friends weren't up to something, and he was used to that. But this was rather strange, even for Sirius. Still drowsy, he decided to wait until late morning to figure anything out. Snuggling back under the covers, he just hoped that a certain deer wouldn't invade his sleep.

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A rather loud and sharp sort of laughter could be heard throughout the Great Hall, coming from the mouth of none other than James Potter. He was shaking a defeated looking Sirius by the shoulder, throwing his head back. Sirius stared angrily at his untouched food.

"You said pleasantly disoriented, James, pleasantly disoriented!" he shouted. James ignored him and continued to laugh.

"I loved your method Padfoot, what was it called? Violation?" he wiped his eyes that were full of mirth.

"At least I made the first attempt. Just wait until you go blind and dizzy. Then who'll be laughing?" However James continued to shake with laughter until Lily Evans came and sat down across from the two troublemakers while grabbing a piece of toast. If it was one thing James knew the most about Lily, it was that she liked her toast. "I could hear you a mile away. What have you two been up to now?"

"Oh fair Maiden Lily, it is not me that is up to anything. It's our dear Padfoot," he chuckled, "he defiled Moony this morning."

Much to their surprise, she smiled. "Poor Remus…"

"Hey! I would expect this from Prongs here, but not from you, Lily. Aren't you supposed to be the one that rolls their eyes and tells him how stupid he's being?"

"I'm allowed to join in the fun, too." She placed her palms on the table and leaned in toward them. "So, Sirius….was he good?" This statement produced another bout of loud laughter from James and caused Sirius to place his head in his hands. "I'm assuming you somehow made your way into his bed. Unless, you know…you like the floor." This made James spit out the drink he had just taken into his mouth. Sirius continued to hide his face.

"Lily! I never knew you could be so…unethical. I don't think my ears can take it."

"Why was he in there, anyway?" she asked James.

He shut down all expression. "That information is classified." She was just about to ask why when Remus raced through the doors of the Hall, eager to obtain the last muffin that was gleaming in the sunshine. "Must obtain muffin…oh, hello Lily--"

"Remus! Remus!" she cried, "I heard what happened this morning," she said mischievously. "Tell me something…were you good?" Remus stared blankly at her for a moment. Then he caught sight of James chuckling and Sirius hiding in his hands, and assumed they must have playfully developed some immoral notion of what happened early that morning while he had still been catching up on sleep.

"Well," he played along with a gleam in his eye, "I suppose I was good." He took a bite of his muffin and pointed at Sirius. "But Sirius, here…I didn't know he could do things like that." He placed a hand on his heart. "He made my dreams come true." Lily exploded into laughter while James raised his eyebrows.

"Padfoot, you dog…" Sirius sighed and finally looked up at Remus.

"Moony, weren't you the one who said I was too dirty for your love?"

"You're never too dirty for my love, just too dirty for my bed."

"So you do like the floor!"

"Shut up!"

As breakfast was over, they exited the Great Hall, James coming to the conclusion that he would make his attempt soon. How victory would be sweet. Students and teachers filed out, looking forward to another day of classes, eager to fill their brains with knowledge and the smell of discovery. However, as silence filled the large room, a lone Peter Pettigrew stood in the doorway.

"Hey…where is everyone?!"

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Yes, poor Peter is clueless once again. And I had to do the bed thing, I just couldn't resist even though it's been done before. Thanks for the reviews!