Oh my! A finished chapter! Um...what to say? Sorry for taking so long.

And there's an OC in here now... Yup. You'll be meeting her.

Chapter 3: Boredom

Eventually I awoke; sitting up upon realizing what I had done. I had let myself fall into sleep's grasp while in Matt's bed. That was an inevitable fact. Even though I felt myself nodding off, I didn't leave. I told lies, and convinced myself that I was able to control my actions. Looks as though I can't do that anymore. I've asked myself—why am I doing this?—more then ever recently. I admit—involving Matt was childish, and unlike me. There is no taking it back, though.

What I need to know now, is whether someone brought me back to my own room without me knowing; or had I remained in his bed for the duration of my time asleep?

Looking around and trying to recognize anything familiar didn't turn out successful. The dark was so prominent I couldn't see my hand in front of my face, let alone anything else. Patting the bed around me, I tried to find something that would hint to where I was. However, I realized that method was getting me nowhere. The beds were the same in every room, and I had to try something else.

Blindly, I stuck my feet off the bed to feel for the floor. If I could reach the light switch, then I could be assured of where I was. Though, it caught me off guard when I felt something else other then a wooden floor.

Pulling my feet back up; I flipped onto my stomach and reached out, using my hands as sensors. Letting my fingers drift through empty space, I waited to once again come across whatever loomed beside the bed. Brushing against a soft head of hair, my first retraction was as if I had touched an open flame instead of the numerous fine, keratinous filaments. Then, I leaned in close to clarify my suspicions. When concentrating, I could almost imagine seeing Matt's faint outline sprawled out beneath. So, I was still in his room. But, why? This wasn't right...why hadn't he woken me up?

Above his head, there was a small green light flashing on and off periodically. Stretching an arm over, I grabbed Matt's DS. It took a while before I was able to open it, but the time came where I finally exposed the bright pause menu for the game he'd been playing. Using the screen as a light, I looked around the room. At last, I caught a good look at Matt, cuddled on the hardwood floor, sleeping soundly.

I didn't know what to do—or why I even cared. Should I wake him up? Or maybe I shouldn't do anything? I didn't know him well enough—and I didn't know the situation well enough—to know what would happen if I tried. I grimaced at the problem I was creating.

In order to discipline, I mentally poked myself for the ideas crawling into my brain. It was wrong to think that I was almost feeling considerate of another human being. I must not ever go as far as to allow myself to think feelings are a part of my reality. It's idealistic to think I can change, and those ideas only lead to another dead end where I realize again how alien I am to what "feeling" really is.

I don't care about others, I've told myself a thousand times and now once more. It's impossible for me to care about others.

I should know myself better than anyone. There is probably some selfish reasoning behind this compulsion to do something kind—whether I can name it right now or not. There has never been an event where I did something that wouldn't, in the end, benefit me. Well, except the few occasions where I would do something out of pure boredom. Though, this wasn't one of those times either. This was neither nor. An unexplainable occurrence. I couldn't bring myself to leave and do nothing. I had to do something to...thank him. Or, whatever.

A thought strung through my mind, hanging right behind my eyes to make sure to get my attention. If I can't feel like a human, I could at least act like one. I took that as a good explanation for my strange attitude, and I crawled off the bed; carefully watching my step as I crept around Matt's head. I had dragged the blanket off along with me and stared at it for a while. The strand of thought still hung before my eyes, reminding me of why I was doing this. I was pretending to be human. And, this is what a human might do. In a few awkward motions, I tried, to my best ability, to cover him.

Was that right? I tried to figure out an answer, but there just weren't any that made sense. I shook my head. Why should I care? It's not like I'm jeopardizing anything meaningful to me if he doesn't like it. I shut the DS and put it back on the floor next to Matt's head.

There was nothing to go by but my awareness of floor as I walked; sweeping my feet back and fourth, creating a narrow radar that might detect a potential hazard such as a wall or downward staircase. Yet, despite my efforts, I ended up tripping and falling anyway. I guess I lost balance while trying to walk with one foot waving around to feel anything that might trip me. Ironic…and just my luck.

Defeated by gravity, I stayed where I was, lying face first on the ground. The floor smelled of must and dust, with something sticky under my left hand. Great. It was times like this where I wish I could stop existing. Just fade away until I was nothing but a memory that was doomed to die soon after I did… But, we all know stuff like that doesn't happen.

I wonder what's in store for me today.

Mello has been oddly lenient today. Matter of fact, he has barely spoke a word to me. After picking myself up off the floor earlier, I made it back to my room without any other mishaps, to relax in my own bed for a while. Of course, I wasn't able to get back to sleep. A few hours of that, I got up to go to class and happened to pass Mello in the hallway. Not a word. Not even a look. That was my relatively quiet morning.

After class, I was alone in the common room. The whole day I had been left alone. Not even Matt sent to check in on me. Just like I had wanted… Right?

I fell back into my old practice; sitting on my own while playing with the little toys left about the floor.

I'm bored.

There's nothing interesting around though. Not that there was anything interesting before—but that has never bothered me before either. It was a state of ennui.

I threw the little toy solder in my hand against the wall, watching it bounce off and skid across the floor. I wish it was as simple as to play with a toy and be fulfilled. But, there is no satisfaction for me. There is only satisfaction when you get something that you want. The thing is—I don't want anything. I'm not motivated. I don't have goals. I can only wonder what it would be like to want something, and to get that something, and to feel good about it. As it seems, if I want to want something, I'll have to find something interesting by myself.

I stood and left the empty room, determined to resolve my problem.

I tried to walk my frustration off at first, but that didn't help. Walking is a stale and uneventful exercise—I don't see the entertainment in it. Anyway, it wasn't what I would consider interesting, so I drifted into the library. A few of the studious children sat at the tables reading, but no one interesting. I browsed along the titles on a few shelves. Nothing interesting...

Where is everyone?

Outside the window I watched as of a group of kids ran past. Outside. There had to be something of interest in such an alive place. Outside, everything is different. Everything is unpredictable. The sound of children again caught my attention. Maybe something interesting is out there.

Lurking in the shadows like a weary cat, I walked the perimeter of the orphanage until a rambunctious group of children playing soccer came into sight. Oh look. Matt and Mello are there too. Interesting.

I sat down in the dry, crunchy grass—and believe it or not…I was distracted enough to forget my boredom. With my head resting on my knees, I watched everyone—those two in particular—running around. Slowly, the ennui festering inside me went away. I guess, I should get out more often... I don't know what exactly made me forget my troubles. There's no way to tell with so many possible variables—I don't fully understand it myself.

I couldn't say how much time I spent in that crouched position, my eyes darting back and fourth as I watched everything before me—I do know that when I went to stand back up, it felt likeas though my joints had been welded together. Everyone was splitting up to do their own business. That meant that they would be coming in my direction. All of them. I pushed through the stiffness, hiking up speed and trying to make it inside before anyone could spot me.

I managed to slip into the common room before a stampede of kids came trampling through. I went to sit in one of the high backed chairs, curling my legs up close to my chest. Why did I have to run away? It was so I could avoid being trodden on…but why did I have to hide as well?

"You are so predictable, did you know that?" Mello droned, strolling in with Matt at his side.

As a matter of fact, I didn't know that. And I don't see how it could be true anyway—even I didn't have a clue about what I was doing, let alone someone else. Even if that were so though, I don't care if I am predictable or not. I am content with having the two of them around to keep the feeling of boredom, and the feeling of want, at bay. However, it worked, and I wasn't going to question it. Whatever it was.

I put my feet down to sit properly. "Good day, Mello. Matt."

Mello scoffed. "What's so good about it? Just because I left you alone for a while, doesn't mean you should get arrogant. This is an olive branch for you, so don't ruin it."

Matt was casually standing by his friend's side, gaze flickering between the Mello and I.

I wonder what he's thinking. Unlike Mello, who leaves all his emotions on the surface, Matt always has the same and never-changing carefree expression. But—that's not possible is it? No. No-one could possibly live life so easily. I don't believe it.

"Of course not," I said to Mello's earlier statement.

I was suddenly lifted up with a hard jerk to my forearm.

"What?"

"Nothing. It was just annoying seeing you sit there."

That made sense. Then again, a lot of what Mello said didn't register in my mind as "sense". Who am I to talk? Even I have been irrational lately.

He let go, pushing me to the side where I teetered for a few seconds before regaining balance. "You don't know how lucky you are to have me change my mind."

With those last words said, Mello left once again. I eyed Matt who lingered behind.

"So what did you do?"

I assumed he had done something. Mello would never have recognized his own mistakes.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Matt replied airily, not making eye-contact.

"Mello didn't change his mind on his own."

Matt gazed at me for a second before changing the subject. "So, how'd you sleep last night? I could see you got up early."

Right. I had conveniently forgotten that.

"Honestly?" I shrugged. "Not too well. I woke up earlier than usual and never succeeded in lulling myself back to sleep. And while on the subject; please excuse me. You ended up sleeping on the floor."

Matt scratched his head. "Ah, it don't matter—it wasn't any problem. Even if you didn't manage to sleep well, I did. I'm pretty sure I could sleep anywhere."

Matt looked like he held no grudge, so that should have been the end. Even if that was so, my sick mind was still stuck on the idea that I had to repay him. I'm not going to feel at ease until I do. I have to thank him, not only for letting me sleep in his bed, but for listening to me, for trusting me, and for stopping Mello's relentless supervision. How would a person make up for that?

"And I was warm too—thanks for the covers!" Matt laughed even though I couldn't understand the comedic value of his words. Was that funny? That wasn't what I was aiming for when I had given him that blanket. It was supposed to be more of...an action of sincere thanks.

"It's a shame, but we never ended up seeing each other today because of Mello's change in heart," Matt smiled with a shrug. "Too bad, huh? It's kinda different hanging out with someone like you—not bad though. I wouldn't mind doing it again. On a rainy day, or something."

I nodded, wondering about when it might rain next. In my short time with Matt, I couldn't say it was an uncomfortable experience. We didn't really do anything, but I wasn't bored. Just relaxed. It was quiet, and I didn't have to be alone…

Matt nodded too.

"Well, Mello and I were gonna play some games in my room today. I'd invite you, but you two are in some rough waters already, and I don't wanna strain the progress you've already made."

Progress? He called what Mello and I had, progress? Nothing had changed. Oh well.

Matt waved a hand as he left the common room. I watched intensely as the door swung shut, leaving me to myself again. There was nothing left to look forward to, so sleep was really the only escape left. If I could fall asleep, I wouldn't have to think. I could be oblivious and ignorant to any trouble for a few precious seconds.

I lied flat on my bed, staring at the speckled ceiling. Why couldn't I force myself to sleep when I wanted to? I started to count the little off-colored flecks above my head, hoping I could be dulled to sleep. I had reached two-thousand seven-hundred sixty-five, when I was interrupted by my door slamming open.

"What is this? There's a boy in the bed!"

I craned my neck to see a girl standing in the doorway, eyebrows raised and mouth unhinged.

"This isn't my room…or is this some sort of freaky service—'cause I'm not into that type of thing. What kind of institution is this? I sure as heck hope I'm wrong…"

I sat up, squinting in the voice's direction. This was a rather unpleasant and unexpected interruption.

"Who are you?" I asked thoughtlessly.

I shouldn't have asked, when I didn't actually care, but it is instinct for me to label whatever leaves an impression; good and bad alike. Though this instinct only started another current with letters and words and sentences that held no significant meaning to me. There was no stopping her now.

"Who am I?" The girl pointed to herself and I was able to squint enough to see her bronzed skin and the tight black curls that stopped at her shoulders. "I'm Creole! Well, that's not my real name, but we're not allowed to use them now, are we? But, that's enough about me, how about yourself? Who are you, and why are you in my bedroom?"

She must have taken a wrong turn our something—the girls section was the other direction entirely.

"I'm sorry, but you must have mistaken your directions. This has always been my room. And, so not to ignore your introduction, I am known as Near."

"Near? Hm. You're an interesting fellow. Well, considering that you're not doing anything right now—care to be my guide? I thought I could do it myself, but apparently not…"

Apparently. "I don't know if I can help you…"

"Oh jeez! You're a man aren't you? Start acting chivalrous and take a lost and confused girl to the main office! You've got to know where it is, right?"

Creole grabbed my upper arm, yanking me to my feet. "You're going to show the way now, aren't you?"

Reading her from her actions, I wasn't going to have a say in it anyway. If anything, maybe taking a walk would drain the energy that wont let me grant me the sleep I crave.

"I suppose I am. You can follow me."

My feet dragged across the floor in a statement of reluctance as I guided Creole through the hallway towards Rogers office. I don't know why, of all the rooms, why did she have to walk into mine?

I shuffled to a stop in front of the office door. Turning to Creole, I was face to face with her green eyes staring back expectantly.

I motioned towards the office, "Um, here it is."

No response.

"Just knock and go in."

She blinked, but remained quiet. Maybe she wants me to leave—which I have no problem accepting as fact. I started to walk away, but Creole was quick to reign me back in.

"You get him."

What? She was going to have me get him?

"You just have to knock—"

"I want you to stay here with me," Creole interrupted. "Go ahead and knock now."

This personality of hers was baffling—I didn't know what to do but comply. I gave a few hard knocks and waited.

There was a muffled, "Hm?"

"Roger?" I called. "There is a girl here. She seems to be lost."

There was more muffled rustling.

"…C-come in!"

I opened the door and Creole pushed past into the small office. I debated whether to leave or not, but as soon as I met those eyes, I made myself follow. I shut the door behind me, leaning against it to stay as far out of her business as possible.

"I see. You're the new one here, aren't you Creole?" Roger said while adjusting his wire rimmed glasses. "Lost, were you? Then I'm glad to see Near was willing to help."

I wasn't really willing…

Creole nodded, curls bouncing up and down without any real direction.

"Yes, he was very gentlemanly. I'm glad to have run into someone so thoughtful as to show me here. Near even said, if he could, he would show me around Wammy's. I'd feel a lot better if he could."

That's a lie. Why is she saying stuff like that?

Roger's eyes sparkled with an old mirth. "Of course! I'm so glad to see you befriending someone after such a short time, Near. Creole's room is at the end of the girls hall and to the right. Please, escort her there once you've finished showing her around."

Creole nodded, taking my hand in hers. "Come on, Near! We're going to have a bunch of fun together—I know it!"

I didn't get a chance to retaliate, respond, or even breathe before as I was forcefully pulled from view of the Wammy householder. How come I am getting dragged around all the time? I've got to say, it is not pleasant. Creole finally showed mercy, coming to a stop in one particularly quiet corridor. She let go, looking again with her expecting eyes. I don't see why. I never agreed to be a tour guide.

"Well, Near…thanks a bunch. You don't really need to show me around; but out of fear that I'll burst into your room again in the middle of the night, perhaps you could show me to where I'm staying?"

It'd be easier if there was a girl doing this…

"Sure." What else could I say? 'Figure it out yourself, I'm going to bed?' I'd never be left alone if I didn't do what she asked. At least, that's what she's lead me to believe.

The hallway with the girls rooms was a fairly new place to me as well. There has never been a reason to visit—so that would make sense. But, the instructions were fairly easy. The last room on the right.

We reached the designated destination and I obediently opened the door to her room. I was ignored as Creole ran and jumped onto her bed. Kicking off her shoes, she sighed and rolled over, looking back at me.

"It's nice, isn't it?" she asked dizzily. "I'm so tired I could sleep forever!"

I stood in the doorway, waiting for anymore commands she might have.

"Good night Near. Shut off the lights on your way out, will ya?"

Creole wadded herself up into her thin blankets. I nodded, doing as she pleased and then leaving to go back to my own room. I've found myself bending to others will's lately. Not just now with Creole, but with Linda, and Matt, and Mello… I've got to stop that.

Ugh! Well...this was very rushed and stuff. Kind of like the title...it's boring. And DON'T WORRY about Creole. Most enjoy her character. Trust in me. Reviews are appreciated. I'll respond personally to each one.

~Reviews are really appreciated~

Might motivate me to finish faster ~_~