"You won't get away with it, Zim!" shouted his pursuer, who was clearly out of breath. Still both of them pressed onward as fast as they could, in a race neither of them could afford to lose. The tall green house was just out of reach.

"Yes I will!" Zim shrieked. He didn't bother looking over his shoulder. If he slowed down even the tiniest bit he would lose too much momentum, and the human would be upon him faster than he could say 'ouch.'

"The gate. Just gotta get to the gate!"

Finally Zim grabbed the handle on the wooden door and hastily turned to fumble with the lock. It was probably a stupid idea because the fence was so short, and the human could just jump over it anyway, but that hadn't occurred to the little invader. He shrieked and leaped back when Dib flipped into his yard.

"S-so you though you could break into m-my house,... s-steal my computer... and just g-get away with it?" The raven headed boy was clearly out of breath, but it didn't give Zim much of an advantage as he was breathless too. They circled around each other, both trembling from exertion, as they sized each other up. Dib clenched his fists and spread his feet, while Zim flexed his claws and raised his hackles.

"But I did, d-didn't I?" panted the Irken. The laptop was safely in his Pak, and the only way Dib was going to get it back was if he fought him for it.

"Not for long, Zim. Y-you give me that computer, and maybe I'll just back off and p-pretend this didn't happen."

The Irken snarled and hissed, his talons flexing under his gloves. He hated how this human tried to intimidate him as if he actually expected it to work. He considered himself an excellent fighter, and he had gone through a lot of training and hardship to achieve that, whereas Dib had been chasing around imaginary creatures like some stupid game. The human would never understand what it meant to be truly intimidating.

Dib braced himself as Zim began to hop side to side like an angry cat challenging another to a brawl. Thirteen exhausting months of trying to expose the alien had taught him that that was Irken body language for "I'm ready to fight," and frankly, Dib wasn't in much of a fighting mood. He had just run thirteen blocks after the the alien, not to mention he was supposed to got to a Swollen Eyeball counsel at eight, and he'd rather not be asked about claw marks all over his face again. The "evil ninja cat" excuse was getting old.

But still, he couldn't let the Irken get his little hands on the information stored on his computer. "Zim!" Dib shouted, losing his patience. "I don't have time for this! Give me the computer, and I'll just go home!"

"Cowardly worm-child! Do you fear the wrath of Zim?" The Irken grinned wildly and begin taking his gloves off, exposing his barbed silver claws. "Or is poor little Dibby too tuckered out from chasing big bad Zim around? Ha!"

"I'm not scared! I just don't want to waste my time with you today. Now hand over that laptop or I'll take it from you!"

"Go ahead!"

Dib cursed himself silently as he spread his feet further apart. He was just giving Zim exactly what he wanted, but if it was the only way to keep him from hacking his computer and revealing the Swollen Eyeball's secrets, then it had to be done.

Dib lunged forward and made the first move, jabbing his right fist at Zim's midsection and throwing a powerful left hook for his jaw. The Irken swiftly weaved his body out of the way, grinning. "You used that same move last time." he said quickly. "Do you remember what I did then?"

Dib did remember, but he didn't get a chance to respond. His attack had left him open, and Zim seized the opportunity to swipe at his face with the claws of his right hand. Dib ducked just in time to avoid them, but also just in time for Zim's left hand to swipe upward, scraping the skin away from the left side of his face, and filling the air with the resounding sound of ripping flesh. Zim retracted his arm, leaping back to give himself room to defend if the human counter attacked.

Instead Dib yelped and jumped backwards, quickly bringing his hand to his stinging face. He didn't know how bad it was, but he could feel warm blood on his hand, oozing slowly out between his fingers. "Ah!"

"Aw poor Dib. Did mean ol' Zimmy give you an owie?" Mocked the Irken with a cocky swagger. "Why don't you go home and let your mommy kiss it so it can be all better?"

Dib pounced so suddenly, the Irken didn't have time to defend himself as they both fell to the ground, Dib firmly pinning down Zim's shoulders, his eyes wide with anger. Without his hand pressed onto his wound, a little trickle of warm, wet blood fell onto the invader's neck, causing him to squirm. "The computer, Zim!" he roared. "Hand it over now, or I'll see what your hideous eyeballs look like squished on the grass!"

The Zim wordlessly struggled for a few seconds more, refusing to answer, and Dib tightened his grip, digging his nails into Zim's arms in hopes of getting him to admit defeat. It probably wasn't such a good idea since it only made the him more desperate, and he lunged forward, digging his knife-sharp teeth into the tendon of Dib's shoulder.

Dib screamed and struggled to pry Zim's jaws away from him long enough to jump out of reach and put a hand on his new wound. The Irken leaped to his feet again too, growling and hopping side to side, letting Dib know that he was ready for round two.

But Dib was done fighting. His face was bleeding like crazy, and now his shoulder was torn. How would he explain this to his dad? He glared at Zim. "This isn't over space boy! I'll be back tomorrow, and I'll be ready! Just you wait!" With that said, Dib turned and ran, barely able to hop back over the fence with his new injuries.

Zim continued to jump excitedly as he watch the human race down the street. "That's right!" he shouted after him, grinning as he pumped his arms. His body was still in fighting mode, and it refused to stay still until the excitement drained out of his system. "You'd better run! I am Zim!"

When the human had finally turned the corner, Zim snorted and went into his house. His legs were getting shaky again from all of the running, and he needed to sit down.

The very first thing that greeted him was the sight of Gir, jumping up and down and up and down on the couch. The grand picture of a green teddy bear above the sofa had transformed into a monitor that he was talking to excitedly, but at the angle Zim was looking at it, he couldn't see who he was on the other end.

"And then we went up and up, and master told me to fly and so I did, and master got his purple suit on. Have you seen master in his purple space suit? He looks like a super hero! An' den he got stomping on the metal. He go stomp, stomp, stomp, until the mean Planet Jacker comes out..."

Zim smiled and crossed his arms, putting all of his weight on one leg so the other could rest. He had yet to hear Gir's take on that particular adventure. This could be interesting. Zim almost forgot to ask who the little SIR was talking to.

"And then they went all ninja! Master gave 'im a YAH! And a HIYAH! And then he kicked him. But then he got squished. And the Earth was saved! And we got home, and I made waffles."

"Uh... That's great, Gir." Tallest Red's voice came up over the speaker. Zim jumped in alarm, antennae straight up in the air, knocking his wig to the floor. "Look, if Zim's not around, just tell him to call us back later..."

"My tallests!" Zim greeted perhaps a little to loudly as he knocked Gir off the couch and took his place. He bowed his head and lowered his antennae in submission. "What a pleasant surprise! Is there a reason you called?" The tallests exchanged glances.

"Do you seriously think we would call you if we didn't have a really super good reason?" Asked Purple.

"Yes."

There was a short pause before Red rolled his eyes and shook his head. "We're calling to tell you about some invader we're sending over."

"WHAT!" Zim's eyes became nearly twice their size, and he pressed his face hard against the monitor, causing both the tallests to raise their eyebrows. "Why?"

"Because you're going so slow!" explained Red. He and Purple had scripted this whole conversation so both of them knew what to say. "We're sending someone experienced over to help you." Zim took a step away from the monitor.

"My tallests," He nervously. His brow knotted and his antennae lowered even further. "I have plenty of experience under my belt! I need no assistance! I assure you, after my next plan, the entire human race will be completely vulnerable and open to attack!"

"And what is that plan exactly?" asked Purple, smirking as he rested his chin in his hand. Red smirked too, and leaned back in his chair, folding his arms.

"It's... it's..." Zim panicked slightly, eyes flicking back and forth around the room. He didn't have a plan yet! Most of his best plans just came to him when he was brushing his teeth or something. He'd never actually brainstormed. "I'm gonna..."

"There is no plan, is there?" Sighed Red, the corners of his mouth upturned slightly, though the invader didn't notice. He slouched forward and sighed.

"No, my tallests. Not yet."

"That's what I thought." Purple was fingering his antennae absentmindedly, looking on with half-lidded eyes."Besides we already sent her, so there's no-"

"Her?" Zim's antennae lifted, although he was careful no to raise them all the way as that would be disrespectful to his tallests. "Sirs, Zim needs no assistance, let alone from a female! Please, can't you at least send someone... tolerable?" The tallests exchanged glances, smiling at each other bemusedly. Zim crossed his arms, determined not to show his impatience.

"Oh she's fine, I think. We like her, at least." Red lied. "She's already flying over there, and she should arrive in a few hours. You should get the base ready for company."

"What! Tallests, why didn't you tell me she was coming before you sent her?"

The tallests shrugged uncaringly and resumed eating donuts from a bowl on the table. "Does it matter? Hop to it, soldier."

Zim sighed and began to cross the room toward the kitchen, but a sudden bark of "Oh and another thing!" from Purple was enough to stop him. The invader raced back to the monitor and stood on the couch once more.

"Yes my tallests?"

"She's five feet and two inches tall, Zim." Red said flatly, and Zim's antennae lowered. "You'll have to take orders from her, and if she gives us a report about any stupid things you do, it will be counted against you." Zim sighed and nodded, taking a step back from the monitor and nearly falling off the couch as a result. But he managed to keep from falling by pinwheeling his arms, and the tallests burst out laughing.

"Very well, my tallests." He said when he had righted himself. "I'll consider it another way to prove my prowess! I assure you, very soon the humans will be destroyed thanks to me! ZIM! And not whatever lousy excuse for a soldier is coming over here."

"S-sure they will, Zim." Said Purple, obviously trying not to laugh. "Ha-have fun with th-that!" Beside him Red was cackling hard, slamming his claws into the table. Zim blinked at them both.

"What's so funny?"

This made the tallests laugh even harder, and Red fell out of his chair off screen. Purple, waved one arm dismissively, unable to say anything for all the laughter pouring from his mouth. "N-nothing! Bye!"

The screen went black and Zim stood there on the couch, staring with both antennae cocked to the side. Then he shrugged and plopped down, bringing his feet up and finally rested his legs. The tallests certainly seemed in a good mood today, and he didn't have a problem with that.

"Gir!" He called. The robot must have wandered off while he was talking to the tallests since he wasn't where Zim had left him. He sat there for a while, waiting for the little SIR to show, but when it didn't he called again. "Gir!"

"I'm a-comin'!" Came Gir's voice from the lab. The little robot flipped out of the trash can and landed beside the couch, hand lifted in a salute, eyes glowing red. It didn't last, though, and Gir's eyes faded to friendly blue once more. "Wuts up?"

"Someone's coming to the base, Gir." Zim said, not making eye contact with him. Gir blinked at him cluelessly and began looking about the room. Then he jumped up and let out an excited squeal as if he had only just realized what his master had just told him.

"Is it the Dibby?" He asked. "Or the neighbor kid? Or a viking?" Zim shook his head at all of these and glared at Gir, quickly growing impatient with him.

"No, Gir. The tallests have sent another invader to assist in conquering Earth."

"I thought we was gonna do that!"

"We are!" Zim swung his feet off the couch and sat up, which Gir seemed to take as an invitation to plop down beside him and snuggle into the cushions. Zim ignored him, though, in favor of ranting. "We'll prove to the tallests that Zim needs no help!"

"Yeah!" Cheered Gir, clapping his hands.

"We'll make that sad little female wish she had never joined the military!"

"Yeah!"

"And then we'll destroy the humans and rule the universe!"

Gir shrieked gleefully and jumped off the couch to the floor, landing on his head. "Yay! I'm gonna make pie for when she gets here!"

"Yes, Gir!" said Zim as he stood. "Go make pie! I'm going down to the lab and tidy up as much as I can. Make sure to keep the doors and windows locked, do you understand me, Gir?"

The robot hopped off his head and landed on his feet. "I'm gonna put strawberries and bacon in it!" he screamed excitedly and made a break for the kitchen. Zim nodded.

"Good. Computer! Take me to the main lab! And start cleanup process."

"Clean up process initiated." Said the computer's monster-truck-driver voice as it opened the floor beneath Zim's feet, and began to lower him into the labs. The Irken flashed a grin of razor teeth, rubbing his claws together as his brain began to plot. Oh yes, he had a plan. And it was an amazing plan.

"Dad!" Gaz's voice floated down the stairs to Professor Membrane's ears. He brought his eye away from his microscope and stood up, straightening his white lab coat.

"Yes, daughter?" He called back.

"Dib got mauled by that cat again!

Membrane's eyebrows went up and he turned his microscope off. "Coming!"

He turned and went up the stairs, taking two at a time until he came into the kitchen, looking wildly about for what to do next. Gaz was seated at the table, a paper and a box of crayons in front of her, indifferent as she always was. "Where is he, Gazlene?" asked Membrane as he approached her. She glanced up at him, but then turned her attention back to her drawing.

"He's in the bathroom, I think. He came in and he didn't say anything, but he had his hand over his face so I knew what happened."

Membrane nodded and went off to the bathroom with quick strides and knocked on the door. He could hear the water running inside quickly shut off, and the sound of a towel being pulled from the rack soon followed. "Son, your sister told me you met that cat again. Can I have a look?"

The door opened and Dib stepped out, a towel held over the left side of his face. He looked absolutely miserable, and the professor quite nearly had a panic attack when he saw the blood on his shirt. "Son!" He cried and knelt down to eye level. "Are you alright? Where did it get you?"

Dib sighed and his eyes wandered, looking everywhere but the scientist in front of him. "It scratched me on the face." He mumbled. "and bit me on the shoulder."

"Alright, son. Let's go down to my lab and see what the damage is."

Dib followed his father back down the stairs into the cool air and dim lights of the lab. He had gone through this same process enough times before to know what to do so he sat himself an examination table and took off his shirt to uncover his shoulder, watching the professor expectantly.

The older man took the towel from him and quickly scanned the scratches on his face, frowning behind his high collar. "Is your eye okay?" He asked.

"It's fine, Dad," responded Dib. "It was closed." The professor nodded and traced the lines downward with his finger. Dib flinched.

"That's strange. It's scratched upwards. Cats usually scratch downwards."

Dib groaned and pulled away slightly. He had tried so many times to explain to everyone that Zim was an alien. It took so much work though, and it was much easier to humor people than try to convince them of the hard truth. That's why he'd come up with blaming all the scratch marks on some nonexistent cat.

"I dunno, I dunno." He skillfully evaded, waving his hand. "I don't know cats. I don't like cats. And they don't like me either." The professor frowned, but discontinued the argument to look at his son's shoulder. The skin was broken as promised with what must have been twenty little pinpricks in two neat arks that looked like they were made by jaws- though certainly not cat jaws.

"Son, are you sure it was a cat? I don't think a cat could have done that."

"It was a cat, Dad," lied Dib. "I saw it with my own two eyes." he squirmed a little bit as he watched the older man cross shift through his drawers, looking for something. 'Please don't let it be a needle and thread!' he thought. Luckily for him the professor had only been looking for bandages and rubbing alcohol.

"Where was this cat you keep seeing?" he asked as he dumped some of the alcohol onto the towel. "Close your eye." he added in an undertone.

"At Zim's street. I think it lives under one of the houses." He said. At least that much wasn't a lie. The professor sighed and put one hand on the back of Dibs head while holding the towel to his face. A wordless high-pitched whine emanated from Dib as the alcohol fizzed and burned.

"How many times do I have to tell you to come straight home after school?" asked his father impatiently. Finally he removed the towel from Dib and began to bandage the cuts while Dib whimpered a while longer.

"But I did come home today, Dad! Zim just got crazy and thought it would be fun to steal my computer."

The professor raised and eyebrow as he re-soaked the towel. "He stole your computer?"

"Uh huh. And I went over to his house to get it back, and we fought for a bit, but he didn't hand it over and then on the way home the cat jumped out and went totally ballistic."

Membrane knotted his brow as he brought the towel down once more onto Dib's shoulder. The little boy let out another drawn out whine. "Did it have a collar?" asked his father.

"No," hissed Dib between gritted teeth, his voice high-pitched with pain. "It's a stray."

Finally the towel was removed from the bite, and Dib let himself relax as Membrane bandaged it up. "I think you should stay out of that neighborhood until I've tracked down and shot that cat," said the scientist. "Really, son, sometimes it fees like I'm patching you up three times a week!"

"You are patching me up three times a week. But I can't stop going over there, Dad! The fate of all mankind depends on me to protect it from Zim's alien evil!"

Membrane chuckled and let Dib hop down from the table. "Boys and their silly games," He said as if reminiscing. "Perhaps you'd prefer games about REAL SCIENCE? Think about it, son! One day you could become an extremely respected scientist, and you'd be able to save the world in whole new ways!"

"Where's all the action though?"Asked Dib, as he picked his ruined shirt up off the floor to examine it. "And the adrenaline? It like the paranormal stuff better."

The professor sighed and took the shirt from him, throwing it into the incinerator. Dib had a whole closet full of shirts just like that one so he really couldn't complain. "Even so, I'm hosting a conference with some other renowned scientists. How would you like to come? You might even learn a thing of two about REAL SCIENCE!" At that Membrane straitened up like a military man and shoved his finger up into the air with a vengeance.

"No thanks, Dad." refused Dib, waving his hand. "The Swollen Eyeball is gonna have another meeting, and I promised Agent Darkbootie I'd be there."

"Ah, yes that little Paranormal enthusiasts club. And how is that going for you, son?"

Dib was just about to go upstairs, but then he whirled around, frowning. "It's not a club, Dad! It's a real agency! We've got code names and everything!"

The scientist chuckled and put the bandages and alcohol back in the drawer where he had found them. "Oh alright, son. Go have fun with your lunatic friends. I have to continue the search for undiscovered properties of water!"

Dib went up the first few steps and then turned around again. "Wait, water? Seriously?"

"That's what I said."

"But haven't we already discovered all the properties of water?"

"Ah, but these are the UNDISCOVERED ones."

Dib shrugged and trudged back up the stairs.

A.N. Reviews make me happy so keep 'em coming.