Hey, sorry this update took so long! It's been like, what, three weeks? Either way, sorry! Life. Thanksgiving turned out to be a big fat bustle when I thought I'd get to relax then of course I got caught up in the prep school wave again once I got back. Anyways, enough excuses.

Enjoy!


Fin's POV

After we finally let Wyatt go with Patrick and Robin, Hope has been acting a little upset and is pretty quiet. I go to sit by her and she doesn't really look at me. She was really hesitant to let Wyatt go. "He's gonna be fine, ya know. They're a really nice family."

She sighs, "I know. I made sure he got some nice people."

"They really seemed willing to work with him, I think he'll grow to like them," I tell her, Robin would make a great mom, I'm glad they were able to get Wyatt. They don't have any other kids so they can really focus their attention on him.

"He didn't wanna leave me" She says, sounding upset, and scared.

"I know. You were able to get him to trust you," I tell her, which was a good thing. We were able to find out a little bit about what had happened to him, and we were able to make sure he got placed somewhere where he would be taken care of.

She just sighs, I know she's got some trust issues, but I'm not exactly sure why, and maybe if she'd tell me I can help her. But I don't think that's going to happen any time soon.

I give her shoulder a squeeze, "You did what you could to help him, now he can get better."

She's quiet, it's almost like she thinks Patrick and Robin are going to do something bad to Wyatt.

"You gonna be okay?" I ask her, she's starting to shut off and I don't want her to push me away every time we talk. I want her to be able to start to open up to me.

She doesn't answer, "What's buggin you?" I ask, hoping she'll tell me a little bit about what's wrong.

She just sighs, and sounds annoyed, "It's nothing"

"You sure? It's good to talk sometimes," I ask, I don't think she's ever had anyone to talk to, so she may not know what to say.

"I guess I've just never had someone to talk to," she sadly says, it makes sense now, she just needs someone that will be there for her and will listen.

"you can talk to me, I'm here to help you too ya know…" I remind her, it would really help if I knew what has happened to her, that way I could make sure she's okay even if she's acting like she's not.

"It's nothin," she sighs.

"You keep saying you're fine and it's nothin this whole time, it's okay to be not fine every once in a while," I tell her, she might not have had an opportunity to just break down and tell someone what was wrong, and it's probably taking a toll on her.

She sighs again, "It's just somethin I don't like tellin people about."

"I promise I'll keep it a secret," I tell her, trying to persuade her to tell me.

She just sighs and doesn't say anything. But I notice she's picking at her nail polish. "I want you to be able to trust me," I tell her, hoping she'll start to soon.

"I used to be one of those kids…" she finally says, it makes more sense now. She was able to get Wyatt to trust her, and she was so worried when we found the foster family.

I sigh, "Like Wyatt?"

She just nods but doesn't say anything.

I squeeze her shoulder, "Have you told anyone this before?"

"Nobody listened." That must have been really hard as a kid, knowing nobody believed her when she was trying to tell them she'd been hurt.

"I'm sorry you had to go through that, but you're safe now though," I remind her, hoping that it's true.

"I know. I'm just trying to forget that whole history" she says, still not looking at me.

"Is that why you came here to new York?" I ask, maybe she moved here to get away from whoever was hurting her.

She just nods.

"That's okay. Look how good you were with Wyatt, I could tell he felt safer with you," I tell her, she will be a big help when we get more cases with kids like him. She understands their fears and had the same questions as them when she was younger.

"I just know how he feels," she tells me.

"That makes sense, I think that helped him open up." A lot of kids that have been through those kinds of things think that no one understands them. But having Hope really helps them, since she's been through it and knows what it feels like so she can really work with them.

"I just tried to make him comfortable," she tells me, sighing.

I smile, thinking about Munch, he was never really good with talking to kids, he didn't know when to stop with his theories and just try to help the kid, "You're much better with kids than my old partner… He could be a little weird sometimes."

"Who was he anyways?" She asks, there's a tiny bit of a laugh in her voice.

"His name is John. Interesting guy to say the least… always had a conspiracy theory about something," I tell her, I bet he would have freaked Hope out at first though.

She just smiles, "Sounds interesting."

I laugh, he definitely is interesting. "Man couldn't make coffee to save his life, good thing you never have to drink the stuff and can stick to Starbucks."

"I always thought that was easier," She tells me, at least I know what kind of coffee she likes, so I can help her out a little bit if she needs it.

"Yeah, are you gonna be alright?" I ask her, I'm just a little worried that she might not want to be alone right now.

"Yeah," She says, sighing and hiding a yawn.

"If you ever wanna talk about it more I'm here…" I remind her, I need to be able to protect her, so if she's scared about something she really should tell me.

She sighs, "I'll be okay."

I just squeeze her shoulder, "Alright, try to get some sleep, you look exhausted."

"I'm fine," she sighs, I wonder if she gets nightmares, I know Wyatt and most kids that have been through those kinds of things do.

"You sure? I know you didn't sleep much the past few nights," I ask, I don't want to push her too much, but she does need the rest.

She just nods.

I rub her shoulder, "Just try to relax a little, it's okay."

"Mmk…" she mumbles, I can tell she's getting tired as she's sitting here, maybe I'll stay with her until she can fall asleep.

"You can sleep here if you don't feel like goin home," I tell her, it might be better so she doesn't feel so alone.

She leans into me, she's definitely tired, she's forcing her eyes to stay open now.

I keep rubbing her shoulder, I think it's helping her to relax "It's okay, just sleep.

Hope's POV

I don't remember what I was dreaming. It was bad, I know that, but I really don't know what it was. I've been having these dreams so long that they all just blend together now into one big, ugly nightmare.

"Hope…" I hear, and a gentle rubbing on my shoulder.

I wake up as soon as I feel his touch. Once I look up I see it's just Fin. A small whimper makes its way out.

"Go away…" I say quietly.

He just continues to rub my shoulder. "You okay?" he asks.

"Yeah," I sigh, even though I'm not. I can still feel myself shaking from whatever I was dreaming about this time but I now can hold back any noises.

"You were screaming…" Fin tell me. I already figured I was screaming if he woke me up. Dammit that means that more people in the precinct probably heard…

"I'm okay," I tell him again. I've had these dreams for years now. I get over them fast enough.

"Are you sure?" Fin asks, "You can talk to me"

"Just a nightmare…" I tell him. I always get nightmares. I barely ever think about it anymore, I've had them so long. I mean, it's still terrible when I get them every night, but I get over them faster once I wake up…

"Wanna tell me what it was about?" he asks.

I sigh. "No."

He keeps rubbing my shoulder. "Just try to relax."

"Just leave me alone…" I mumble. This is why I never let people see me asleep. This always happens. They see me when I have a nightmare and they start thinking that they can just fix me, like it's that easy. It's not. I've always done fine by myself and it's not like I need their help to take care of myself. I've been on my own long enough to know how I work so I don't need them in my business. Just because I didn't have anything anywhere near a normal childhood doesn't mean that I can't do anything for myself now. Fin is my partner and I know he just wants to watch out for me, but I don't think he needs to know all the details.

Fin just sighs. "It's okay Hope, I just wanted to make sure you were okay."

"I'm fine," I repeat, I wish he'd just go away…

He fixes the blanket around me, "Just try to get some more sleep, I'll come check on ya later."

"I can't sleep anymore," I sigh, getting up with the blanket still wrapped around me. After I get these kinda nightmares I can never sleep afterward. It's just a problem I have so I usually take sleeping pills.

"you sure?" Fin asks, looking at me. "It's only three, why don't you try to just rest."

"I'm fine," I tell him. Seriously, how many times am I gonna have to say that?

He just sighs. "I can tell you're still tired. I'll stay with you if you wanna try sleeping again."

"I don't."

"How often do you get these nightmares?" Fin asks me. I don't say anything, I'd rather not answer. "You can trust me Hope, I'm not gonna tell anyone this"

"Just make sure you don't," I tell him, walking out of the room.

"Hope, there's nothing to be mad about, or scared of," Fin says, following me.

"I'm not scared!" I yell back.

He sighs. "It's okay… just relax. Do you want me to drive you home?"

"No."

"Just go sit on the couch or something, I can make some coffee…"

I just sit on the couch. At this rate, I'm gonna be up for a while and coffee might be a good idea. Why not, right?

He brings me some coffee and another blanket since I threw the other one off when I walked off.

"Just try to calm down," he says, handing the coffee to me.

"I'm fine," I say, yet again.

He sighs. "Alright, I'll let you have some time to yourself," he tells me, walking off.


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