Chapter 7
RING RING RING! I thought I was dreaming that the phone ringing especially when I opened my eyes and saw the clock said 3:19 am. I started to drift back to sleep when I heard it again. I sat up and looked at my phone 'Mom'? What in the hell..."Mom, whats wrong?" If someone is calling you at that hour there has to be something wrong. "Hannah, honey, you need to get dressed and come here now." "Mom whats wrong, is dad OK?" "Yea he's fine" she took a deep breath and started to speak again "Hannah there was a plane crash and -" "A plane crash? What? What are you talking about?" "Hannah a plane, it crashed, the guys were on it." The tone in my mother's voice was shaky. "Guys?" "Yes Hannah James and the guys, they were on their way back from Vegas and -" I didn't hear the rest, my heart went to my throat. "No God No!" "Hannah get here now" I didn't say anything else, I don't think I did anyway. All I was thinking was 'God please let me just wake up from this horrible nightmare, please God.'
I have absolutely no recollection of getting into my car or driving to my parents house, I was just there, standing in the kitchen waiting for someone to tell me what in the hell was going on. I wanted to scream at someone to tell me something, I wanted to know what, where, when, who, how but there was nothing. Nothing was coming out of my mouth. Every hair on my body was standing on end. "Hannah, Mr. John is at his house lets walk over." My mother told me as she started to walk me to the back door so that we could just walk through the backyard into his house. The next thing I knew I was running full speed to his house, leaving my mother behind. I thought I was taking the door down, I went through it that fast. "Please tell me you know something." I was breathing heavy and I noticed I was now crying. "Mr. John please tell me he's alive." "Honey, I don't- I don't know. He text me around ten to tell me they were taking off and he told me the flight number. I was doing some work when a news flash came across the screen on my computer and said that there was a plane crash right outside LAX airport and it was the same flight number." He paused and took a deep breath. I could tell he was on the verge of tears which would have been understandable but for some reason he didn't have any tears at all. I'm not sure how long my mother had stood next to me but she grabbed my arm and spoke. "Have you called local hospitals?" "Yes they said that they have people flooding into them and surrounding hospitals as well and that I could go there to see if maybe I could find him or identify him." He hung his head and then looked back at us "so I'm going to head up there now." He picked up his coat and keys "Ill let you know when I hear anything" I looked at him "Im going with you." My mother then said "Yea I think I should go too."
~Flashback~
Christmas eve party.
'James' I have wanted to see him so bad in the last year but I wasn't ready for this. I wasn't ready to see him. What am I going to say? What am I going to do? Holy shit! "Merry Christmas Hannah." James said as he hugged me. "Hey! Merry Christmas." I said back with the fake-st smile I could muster. "Surprised to see you here." "Yea. Well they gave us a few days off so I decided to come home for Christmas." "Good! I'm sure your dad is excited." "Oh yea." Wow! This isn't how I pictured this going down. I'm not really sure what I thought was going to happen but I didn't think we would stand here like nothing happened, like we never loved each other. I don't know but standing here in front of him was starting to become painful. I asked him how things were going with the band and everything else. He told me that it was all going great and that he was excited about starting the tour in the spring. Then he said something that felt like he punched me right in the face. "The happiest I have ever been." I would have felt better had he punched me in the face, I would have prefered that. I looked at him like 'really'. "Im sorry I have to go" And I took off out the front door. I didn't care that I was leaving my sister behind I didn't care that I didn't say goodbye to anyone. I just knew I had to get the hell out of there. I would call my sister from the car and tell her to meet me at my house when she was ready to leave. I felt the tears falling from my eyes. 'the happiest he has ever been'? Really? "Hannah. Wait." It was James following me. I didn't turn around until I felt someone grab my arm. "Hannah." "Really James? The Happiest you have ever been. What the hell does that mean? Did I not mean anything to you? Did the 7 and half years we were together not mean anything to you? God, what the hell was I thinking because that was probably the happiest I had ever been and probably ever will be. James just go back in there and have fun." "The day you told me that we were over, that you had enough you broke my heart into a million pieces. Don't you think that hurt me. After 7 and half years you were just ready to end it and say "fuck it I can't handle it". That hurt Hannah. It did and I know I told you that if it ever got to be too much to tell me but Jesus Hannah I didn't think that it was going to be the first time things got tough for you." "The first time? Seriously, I put up with this shit for 4 year. Four years James I sat around waiting and waiting. I'm sorry that I wanted more than just a long distance relationship, forgive me." "If thats what helps you sleep at night but you know damn right well that you bailed the first chance you got." I was now crying out loud. "I baled? No I didn't bail I wanted more and I knew that was not going to happen so yes I told you." "And you walked away from us. You weren't even willing to try to make it work." "I TRIED TO FUCKING MAKE IT WORK FOR 4 YEARS." " And again the first time it got tough, you walked away. Hannah just remember you did this. This right here-" he said pointing between the two of us "-this is all your fault. We will never be friends or anything like it because a year and a half ago you decided to walk away from us. Remember that."
~End Flashback~
I'm not really sure how long we have driven, I think I fell asleep or maybe its just that I'm on auto pilot. I look at the clock on the dashboard to see if maybe I could figure it out. It says 6:24 but that doesn't really mean anything because I'm not really sure what time it was when we left. I don't know, ugh I just want to wake up from this nightmare. I lean back against the window, neither my mom nor Mr. John are saying anything, not really sure if they had said anything this entire time. I hope we get there and everything is OK. I hope everyone is OK for that matter. Oh my gosh! Please God let me wake up. I just wish that we knew something. I did venture to the Internet but all they are saying is that their was a plane crash and they aren't sure about any fatalities. They say they haven't received any numbers. Numbers? He is a number now, they all are, they are numbers. They don't really know what caused it yet either. I don't want to think about it because the thought of never seeing him again made me want to throw up but I couldn't help but to think about the last conversation I had with him. God if that's the last conversation I had with him- 'stop Hannah' I started to cry silently. I knew we were now somewhere near LA because I began seeing signs for the airport.
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After checking two hospitals they sent us to the trauma center. Mr. John walked over to the receptionists desk "Im looking for my son, he was involved in the plane crash-" The blonde haired girl responded "Yes sir we have 14 patients from that crash, ill get the doctor for you." We walked to the waiting area and sat. Not one of us said anything, we just waited. A tall, white-haired man approached us, "Hi, Im Dr. Lutz. I understand your here to find your son." Mr. John nodded "We have been to 2 other hospitals and they sent us here", it was the same routine as the last two hospitals we had been to. The doctor began speaking again "OK, you can come with me-" he looked at my mother and I "-sorry only one." They disappeared behind double doors. My mother and I sat in silence, neither one of us saying anything.
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After what seemed to be hours Mr. John came out from behind the double doors with his face red and tears falling from his eyes. Oh God no! I stood up and ran to him as fast as my shaky legs could carry me, "Is he here?" I asked with tears falling down my face. His head fell, "IS HE HERE?" I said sternly. He looked up at me and nodded "Yes he is, Hannah he is here."
(A/N) Next chapter will be up ASAP!