Hanah Potter: Their father is Beetle. I just thought it would happen, ya know? ;)
Chapter Two
Sarah woke up the next morning at 5:00. Don't ask.
She was just tying her sash when a brilliant idea sprang into her mind.
"I'VE GOT IT!" she screamed.
If you're wondering how the parents reacted to her very, very, loud voice, well, lets just say that Silas, Marcus, and Nora's parents just snorted a bit. Sarah and Milo's father lifted his head slightly and muttered, "Where, oh WHERE did she get this from?" and fell back to sleep. Their mother barely stirred.
As you can tell, they're pretty used to it, after listening to about eight years of Sarah, Milo, Silas, Marcus, and Nora (well, not her as much) waking up on the weekends at 5:00 and shouting to wake the dead.
Sarah rushed over to Nora's room and prepared to shake her if need be, but she was already up.
"What exactly do you have?" asked Nora, rubbing her eyes.
"A splendid idea, my friend! And we shalt tell the others once they awaken!" proclaimed Sarah. She leaned down and whispered into Nora's ear. The older girl grinned. "Excellent. Perfect. Genius." "Isn't it, though?"
Sarah went back to her room to start drawing up a plan. As soon as she completed a list, she rushed out into the hall. The other four were standing there, fully awake and dressed.
"Whatcha got?" asked Marcus. She showed it to them. "Step one" read Silas. "Buy slingshots. There's a shop—" "Oh, I know that place. On the corner of Something Street and Whatchamacallit Way" said Sarah, scratching her chin as she tried to remember the names of the roads.
"Come on, let's get some breakfast," said Silas, already sprinting downstairs. The others quickly followed.
They spooned porridge into their mouths faster than Uncle Sep's dragon and raced out the door.
They didn't leave a note. They never do. Their parents know that they've just gone out for a jaunt or something.
"Let's ask directions from Uncle Sep. He'll know where it is," said Marcus. They blasted up to the Wizard Tower gates and Sarah whispered the password. As they entered the Wizard Tower, the floor read: "Welcome Royal Rambles." Milo stared at it.
"That's odd. I thought it would say, 'Welcome Apprentices, Princess, and Nora." "Yeah, I thought that was boring, so I reprogrammed it" said Sarah nonchalantly.
"How'd you reprogram it? Where do you do it?" Nora asked Sarah, who had called down the stairs and was waiting for it. "Well, you know the Ice Tunnels?" Nora nodded. "Down there, directly under the Wizard Tower, if you chip away at the ice on the top a little bit, there's a thing with a bunch of stuff written on it. I just told it to say 'Welcome Royal Rambles", and ta-da, it did."
Soon the stairs came to their floor. Silas said, "Fast" and they hopped on quick before it took them away.
There was one little problem.
It didn't move.
Marcus kicked it and screamed, "YOW!" Silas tried to push on it and Sarah helped him. Finally it started to move, really really fast.
Milo knocked on the great purple door. There was a groan and a grunt of, "Whoizzit?"
Nora asked Sarah, "Were there any other things that happened? When you reprogrammed it, I mean."
"Whe-ell, there was that one thing, but I don't know it it's worn off y—" "Good grief, you five, can't a guy get an ounce of sleep?" Septimus had opened the door and was still yawning.
"We need directions to the store that sells slingshots," said Milo.
"Mmkay. Here, I'll take you there." He pulled on his cloak and walked out the door. The snores that still came from the room showed that Koran was still asleep.
As soon as Septimus could see the floor, it read, "Welcome LegLess Invertebrate." His mouth opened and closed silently as some of the younger Ordinary Wizards giggled.
"So it hasn't worn off yet!" proclaimed Sarah. Septimus glared at her. She grinned sheepishly. "Hey, all I know is that I changed ours to Royal Rambles, and you became LegLess Invertebrate. Congrats."
He slapped himself in the forehead. People do that a lot when they're around Sarah.
As they jumped down from the stairs, Septimus nodded to the other Wizards and muttered the password as the group exited the Tower.
He walked them to the small store and left them there, calling behind his shoulder, "I hope Koran hasn't found his present yet."
"You got any money?" Milo asked Sarah. She fiddled around in her pockets and came out empty. "Nope." "None." "I think I've got something" said Nora, and pulled out a few half-crowns. "I have some, too" added Marcus. Pooling their money, they walked into the store.
The five came out a few minutes later with a slingshot each. "And the best part is, I got a discount 'cause I'm the Princess!" said Sarah with a grin. Silas looked at the list again. "Step two: ask Uncle Sep how much and what kind of food he's going to have at the Apprentice Supper" he read. "That's easy. Let's run and ask him." And so the Royal Rambles took off too the Wizard Tower for the second time that day. And it was only 7:00.
Marcus knocked on the purple door and this time Koran answered it. He eyed them warily. "What do you want?"
"We need to ask Uncle Sep how much and what kind of food he's having" said Nora. Septimus came to the door. "Now what?"
"Repeat: How much and what kind of food are you going to have at the Apprentice Supper?" asked Silas.
Septimus scratched his head. "I dunno, a bunch of desserts, some entrees, some drinks, and a bunch of fruit and veggies."
Milo rolled his eyes. "Be a tad more specific." "Okay, there will be pies"—Sarah gave a thumbs up to the others—"cakes, a chocolate fondue, pastries, doughnuts, crème brulee, flan, chicken soup, steak, noodles, lasagna, pizza, clams, mussels, crab, calamari, lobster, fish, oysters, soda, juice, strawberries, blackberries, raspberries, oranges, apples, potatoes, carrots, cabbage, lettuce, corn, and pumpkin."
Silas let out a long, slow whistle. "Yowza, that's a lot" breathed Marcus. "Sounds like a little slice of heaven to me" said Sarah with a grin. "Now, is that all?" "Yup" said Milo. "Let's go, guys."
As soon as they were outside, Silas pulled out the list. "Step thr—oh wait, there is no step three. Huh." "Well, duh, there is no need to have a step three" scoffed Nora. "All we have to do is wait."
And wait they did. But not silently, oh no, nothing with the Royal Rambles is ever silent. I don't even believe that word is in their vocabulary.
For the next 11 hours, they went into the forest and annoyed their other, much older, cousins, sat on a bench and discussed whether licorice was better than custard, got hold of a microphone and broadcasted the end of the world across the Castle (therefore making people panic), caused mayhem in the Manuscriptorium by knocking over at least five stands and 13 desks (one of the scribes sighed and asked his friend where the kids got their hyper/weirdness from, to which his friend replied, "Maybe a bit from Milo and Sarah's father."), built a 6-foot sculpture of a wolf out of toothpicks, and finally danced to music for an hour and a half.
"Whew! So much craziness in one day. I'm gonna pass out" wheezed Marcus. Nora agreed.
The Royal Rambles had barely anytime to relax before Milo and Sarah's mother poked her head in. "Come on, kids, it's time to go."
Sarah winked at the others and groaned. "Why do we have to go?" "Because Septimus is your uncle. And I'm sure you'll get to know Koran a bit better." "Big whoop" she grumbled.
As they walked to the Wizard Tower, Sarah reviewed her plans with the other four. The five rehearsed it, and then, grinning like some demented zombies, they zipped inside the Tower.
The Apprentice Supper was held in the Dining Hall. The families piled in and Silas made stupid faces at Kaia, his 17-year-old cousin. She rolled her eyes and pointedly turned to talk to her brother Max. Food was already on the table and Milo was staring at it. "Um, Mi? You're drooling."
As Sarah settled down in a chair next to her brother and Nora, she glared at Koran, her violet eyes narrowing into tiny purple slits. He glared back, green light in his slits. She made a scoffing noise and looked away. She struck up a conversation with Milo and they were arguing about the best way to TP a house when Septimus interrupted.
"We gather here tonight to welcome the next ExtraOrdinary Apprentice." Most of the others clapped. As you might expect, the Royal Rambles just slapped their hands together once and went back to their conversations. "A-HEM" Septimus cleared his throat and they grinned sheepishly and stopped talking. "And now, Koran…"
Sarah hissed, "Get out your slingshots!" to the others, and they pulled them out of their pockets. "…I would like to formally ask you…" "Grab some food!" she whispered. "…is it your wish to become my apprentice?"
Koran had not even opened his mouth when Sarah jumped up on the table and screamed, "FOOD FIGHT!"
She began by shooting a pie at Koran and then food flew everywhere. Milo undershot a cabbage into some guys face, Silas and Marcus shoved cakes in each others faces, and Nora dumped a juice bottle all down a ghost. As this made him feel like he was made of juice, he began to feel very ill.
Even Milo and Sarah's father joined in the fun, until the look on his wife's face warned him to stay back. But Septimus had no wife to stop him and he flung food all over the place. Koran shrugged after looking at the ExtraOrdinary, and then he tossed a flan back at Sarah. She blocked it with a plate and jumped until she stood in front of him, then smirked and dumped a soup on his head. He blew a noodle out of his face and picked up a doughnut to throw, but quicker than he thought possible she was at the other side of the room, having a spoon battle (with ridiculously large spoons that probably came from the fondue pot) with Milo.
The fondue pot.
If I had that, I…I'd be able to master any of them.
Koran lunged forward and grabbed the pot, some chocolate sloshing up on his green tunic as he lugged it across the room.
Sarah and Milo had given up their spoon fight and were now dumping mashed potatoes into everybody's hair. Totally unsuspecting, right?
Wrong.
Koran finally got behind Sarah, and lifted it above his head, ready to dump it on her. But then a drip of chocolate plopped onto her shoulder. She turned around, grinned sweetly, and then grabbed the fondue pot and slopped it all over Koran. She ran off guffawing and screaming, "IT'S A CHOCOLATE MONSTER!!!"
Koran gritted his teeth to keep from swearing some colorful oaths.
All the other Royal Rambles were laughing their heads off.
That ended the food fight, and then Septimus asked Koran again if he accepted the position of ExtraOrdinary Apprentice, and he did. This time, everybody clapped. They looked stupider with mashed potatoes in their hair, and someone had stuck a carrot in Nora, Silas, and Marcus' fathers ear.
As the Royal Rambles walked home, Nicko was still chortling. His wife rolled her eyes at him and snapped, "Honestly, Nicko, it wasn't that funny!" "But it was " he chuckled. "That was the most fun I've had in years."
Jenna looked down sternly at the kids. "You do know you're grounded, right?" "Oh yes, we figured that out early on" said Sarah cheerfully. "We decided to not waste time yelling and screaming this time." "Good."
She grinned. "But we'll have a lot of fun next week. Or next month." Milo snorted. "Whichever we get."