Here we go again! hope you all enjoy it!
Thank you so much to everyone who has been leaving me such lovely reviews, i know i say it every chapter i really do appreaciate hearing your thoughts so much. it really does make my day! Also thanks to Mari for beta-ing again! You're a star, thanks for getting it back to me so quickly!!!
When Harm was finished getting changed, he came out to find Mac curled up on the sofa surrounded by files, with one balanced precariously on her lap. He paused for a moment to watch her. She was completely engrossed in what she was reading. She had tied back her wet, dark hair, which was escaping in curly tendrils to frame her face. She looked really comfortable, like she belonged there. A smile appeared on his face as he thought back to the food fight they had had earlier. If Mattie and Jen hadn't interrupted them… he felt himself blush as he remembered his actions and the look of surprise, but not displeasure, on Mac's face.
Mac could feel his eyes on her. He'd been staring at her for the past two and a half minutes. Knowing that it would have to be her that made first move after her words in Paraguay, she couldn't resist flirting a little bit.
"See something you like, Sailor?!" She said in a slightly breathless, but bored voice without looking up from the paper on her lap. She grinned to herself as, out of the corner of her eye, she saw Harm jump about six feet in the air at the sound of her voice.
"So what if I do?!" he replied, much to her shock. She had presumed that he would retreat again, back into the pattern that they we stuck in; flirt...get too close…bolt.
She looked up at him, and saw that he was once again smiling that slightly nervous smile, like he couldn't quite believe what he had just said, but was waiting hopefully to hear her response.
"That depends on what you're going to do about it!" Mac heard her own voice say. She froze in sudden terror, trying not to look in Harm's direction. Silence. Mac was now acutely aware of the blush that had appeared on her cheeks. Idiot, a voice in her head said, you were getting along so well, now he's going to run away. All because of you. Just like everyone does. It's all your fault. Mac felt hot tears pricking at her eyelids as the words of self doubt that had haunted her entire life, came rushing to her mind once again. She could still feel Harm's eyes on her.
Harm couldn't believe it. She hadn't thrown him a red light! Quite the opposite, in fact. But now he could see she was withdrawing back into her shell, her emotional defences reasserting their dominance over her mind. Determined to stop her from closing him out again, he did the only thing that he could think of. He raced over to her, reached out and tilted her head so she was looking at him, and kissed her ever so gently and briefly on the lips.
Mac jumped as she felt the touch of Harm's hand, her eyes widening as she realised he was now kneeling in front of her, a gentle expression she had never seen before in his eyes. The feeling, even for such a brief time, of his lips on hers absolutely floored her and she let out a slight sigh as he pulled away, his eyes fluttering open as he sat back on his haunches.
They stared at each other in silence for a few seconds, both unable to speak, and terrified at what the other might say, Harm almost waiting for the feeling of Mac's hand coming up to slap his face. He saw her hand moving towards his face, and he steeled himself to wait for the blow that was sure to come. He deserved it after all. But it didn't. To his surprise, her fingers landed softly on his cheek, running down the side of his face slowly, torturously. His eyes had flickered closed again at her touch, savouring the feel of her fingers on his skin, as he was still half sure that any moment soon she would come to her senses and hurt him for being so presumptuous.
"Harm?" her voice was a whisper. It took all of Harm's courage to open his eyes and force them to meet her beautiful brown ones. What he saw in them surprised him, allowing hope to once again surge in his heart. She was smiling. A full-blown Mac smile. One that he hadn't seen for a long time. He opened his mouth to say something, but was promptly shushed as Mac pressed her finger to his lips to stop the words escaping.
Mac's heart was still racing from the kiss, let alone the electricity which was now crackling between them. All she could think of was kissing him again. And again. Sure they had kissed before, a lot more passionately as well. But never had his kiss been so full of promise, full of hope. It hit her suddenly, that no matter how many times they had pushed each other away, hurt each other either on purpose or my mistake, they were just meant to be together. There was nothing else to it. He was the only one who she could ever picture growing old with. Very slowly, she kneeled down next him, all the while never breaking eye contact. Then, she leaned forward and kissed him, her arms wrapping around his neck as the kiss deepened and became more passionate. Both of them were too distracted to hear anything not the door of the apartment open and the soft foot falls of a teenager which paused suddenly as her eyes took in the scene in front of her, nor the footsteps quickly moving away again and the soft click of the door shutting.
Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god! It worked! Were the only coherent thoughts running through my brain as I race down the hallway back to the apartment I share with Jen.
I hurtle into the apartment, "Jen! You'll never guess what…." I yell as I collapse onto the sofa next to my roommate.
"It worked?" she guessed with a grin, taking in my happy face and the fact that I returned without the popcorn I'd gone in search of in the first place.
"Yep! I just walked in on them kissing!" I reply excitedly, "They didn't notice me, so I snuck out again! But isn't that so exciting?!"
"That's really great Matts." Jen replies with a smile, but I can see that she's not as happy as I am.
"What's wrong? Aren't you pleased about it?" I ask, worried.
Jen sighed. "Of course I'm happy! I'm over the moon for them, I can't think of two people who deserve to find happiness more than Harm and the Colonel." She replies with a genuine smile.
"But?"
"I'm worried about the General's reaction. The UCMJ has some pretty clear rules on fraternisation between officers. Before, with Admiral Chegwidden I think they could find a way around it. He was a lot closer to his staff than the General is. With the Admiral, everyday he half expected them to come into his office and tell him their relationship had changed; he was in on the office pool! But the General is completely different."
"I'm sure it will be alright!" I reply. I've never really understood all the Navy rules and regulations. These two people have been in love with each other for so long. Surely they aren't going to get in trouble for that. "Should we go in and see them when the movie finishes?" I continue. "I want to make sure everything's alright."
"Sure!" Jen agrees, and I can see her eyes sparkle with excitement. The one thing I noticed about the JAG team the few times I have met them, is just how much of a family they are. I know Harm doesn't have the easiest relationship with his mother, and from the time I've spent with Mac I've come to realise that our families share similar traits, so she doesn't really have any family either. They are all a lot closer than just work colleagues. They stick up for each other, support each other through everything. They are everything a family should be.
I can't stop smiling now. I really can't believe it worked! They looked pretty involved in that kiss! I wonder how it happened. I sigh happily to myself and turn my attention back to the screen, where Reese Witherspoon is just about to sign her divorce papers at her wedding. I hope that one day I'll have a guy looking at me the way that Harm looks at Mac, or Jake looks at Melanie in the film.
MAC's POV
After a while we pull back from the kiss. My heart is pounding like crazy, I'm straddling Harm's lap, and my lips feel a little bit swollen. But I can't stop the grin that I know has appeared on my face. Harm is looking at me in a way that I've never seen before. I think he wants to kiss me again. He's flashing that Flyboy grin at me. I wonder if they teach that at flight school…He's certainly got it down to a T. I think idly as I feel my already weak defences start to melt and I lean in for another kiss. We stay like this, trading kisses for about 15 minutes, I say about because I really can't be sure. He seems to have thrown my internal clock slightly out of whack, something that I am never going to mention to him.
I am crazy about the guy, but I'll be the first to admit that he has a rather healthy ego and I'm not about to start building it up any further. When we both pull back, we look at each other a little sheepishly.
"So…" Harm starts, obviously not sure what to say. I don't blame him. I don't have a clue either.
"That was um…" I hear myself responding, unable to articulate my thoughts completely.
Harm's flyboy grin is back as he seems to understand what I'm saying.
"Yeah" he agrees, blushing slightly.
We stare at each other for another few minutes. Four, I think, but I still can't be sure. Then I just start laughing. I can't help it. I just keep giggling. Harm is watching me with a slightly hurt look on his face and I can't say I blame him.
"I'm sorry Harm, I'm not laughing at you!" I manage to get out, "I'm laughing at us! We're acting like teenagers!"
He smiles then, knowing that it is true. "So.." he starts again, clearly slightly tongue-tied. "I…uhhh…" he sighs softly, and leans forward to give me another brief kiss. As he pulls back, I reach out and grab his hand in mine.
"Harm," I say nervously. I need to get this out, whatever is going to happen between us can't start until I've told him this. My expression is obviously showing my nerves, and he start to look away again. I tug on his hand slightly and he looks at me again. I take a deep breath and start, "I'm sorry." I say simply.
He looks like he's about to respond so I carry on quickly, my heart pounding. "I've never regretted anything like I do what I said in Paraguay."
Harm opens his mouth to reply, and I put a finger over his lips to shush him. He needs to understand this otherwise it will eat him up inside. I know my Flyboy. "I didn't mean it Harm. I was just so exhausted by it all, don't think I don't understand what you gave up to come and rescue me. When I was lying on that table, all I could think about was you. That I was going to die, and we had never managed to get past our issues; the only man I could ever envision spending the rest of my life with, and we couldn't get past it.
Then you appeared, just like I had hoped you would, but with everything we had to do we just never had the time to talk about us. Something inside me just snapped and just I couldn't cope with it all anymore. I hated myself the minute I said the words, but they were already out there. We have always done such a good job of hurting each other with words and I didn't know how to fix it." I feel the tears rising in my eyes as he looks at me expressionlessly. I can't tell what he's thinking. I never can. His silence is unnerving me so I look at my hands, trying to fight the tears that are slipping down my face.
Suddenly I find myself engulfed in his arms. He is holding onto me for dear life, pulling me firmly against his chest.
"God, I love you so much." I hear him say softly, and the tears start falling faster. I can't stop them. I'm not sure if even I understand just how long I have been waiting to hear him say those words. We stay like that for a while. Just holding each other, until we are predictably interrupted by the arrival of a rather cheerful teenager and Petty Officer.
"Hi gu…" Mattie starts as she bounds exuberantly into the apartment, trailing off when her eyes land on us. "Sorry, are we interrupting?" she says after a moments hesitation. I pull back from Harm's embrace and smile warmly at her.
"No, we were just about to put a DVD on ourselves, we aren't getting anywhere with the case. Why don't you to join us?" Mattie looks dubiously from my obviously puffy eyes to the unreadable expression on Harm's face.
"Are you sure?"
"Positive" Harm replies firmly, smiling down at me warmly. Thank god! I think to myself, he understands. He gets to his feet stiffly; he has after all been sitting on the floor for the last hour or so, and his back is obviously a bit sore.
"Do you girls want a drink?" he says as he moves into the kitchen. He nods at Mattie and Jen's requests and shuffles off quietly. I can feel their eyes on me, so I look up and give them a big smile.
"We were going to put a West Wing DVD on, why don't you find one you want while I help Harm with the drinks." The girls quickly agree. Bless them, they know that they have interrupted something and are clearly doing their best to give us some space. I hop to my feet quickly and follow after Harm.
We stand next to each other, sorting out the drinks in silence. Mattie and Jen's chatter floating across from the other side of the apartment. It's not the most awkward silence we've shared, but its close.
Then Harm speaks. "I'm sorry too." He says quietly. "I was being a jackass then. Everything I did just seemed to make the situation worse. I was so scared of losing you Mac, I didn't know what to do, or how to make it right."
I turn to face him, a teary smile on my face. "Well I think you've managed it right now Sailor." I reply, looking up into his worried eyes. The relief I find there is touching and I just have to stand up on tiptoe and press my lips against his again. His arms wrap around me and I feel myself melting into his embrace.
"So we're ok?" I hear him whisper as he pulls away.
"We're ok." I agree, smiling at him shyly which he returns with equal shyness.
"We better get in there, I suppose." He says after a few seconds. I nod and pick up mine and Jen's glasses, following him back to the living room, where Mattie and Jen are lounging on the sofa, taking up all of the room. I put the glasses on the table and turn to face them, hands on my hips.
"And where am I supposed to sit?!"
"On Harm" Mattie replies innocently, "I'm sure he gives good hugs!" I laugh at that and exchange an amused glance with my partner.
"Well I suppose he probably would make a good pillow!" I reply with an exaggerated sigh, trying not to laugh as Harm quirks an eyebrow at me. I move quickly over to where he has sprawled in the armchair and sit gingerly on his lap, hideously aware of Mattie and Jen watching me. I fidget slightly, trying to get comfortable, when Harm pulls me back suddenly, so I am sitting on his lap, with my legs stretched out over the arm of the chair, my head on his shoulder and his arms firmly wrapped around my waist.
"Comfy Ninja Girl?" he murmurs softly in my ear.
I flash him a quick smile, "Very!" I reply under my breath in what I hope is a sexy tone.
He grins back at me disarmingly and I force myself to turn my attention to the TV. Now is not the time for those kinds of thoughts! A few minutes in, I take advantage of Mattie and Jen's distraction to lean up and whisper in his ear.
"And Harm? I love you too." He looks down at me, his eyes almost as wide as the smile that threatens to split his face in two. He kisses me quickly, conveying one hell of a lot of emotion into that brief kiss.
We turn our attention back to the screen, both grinning hugely.
We're going to be ok.
teehee, fluff! i love it! hope you did too!!!
1 more chappie to come and then i'm closing the lid on this one! with any luck inspiration for my other stories will return!!
thanks for reading!