Daryl spent two weeks, carefully picking off every last walker near the farm. Moving from one spot to another, he kept them running in circles as he dropped them one at a time. Three days of dragging their bodies into piles, Daryl lit a match and watched them burn. The fire flickered, entrancing Daryl, as his mind floated off to memories of other fires. Fires that killed. Fires that protected. Fires that they all sat around as a family.
Tears actually came to his eyes as he thought about all of those they'd buried…and burned.
He lost his brother.
He lost his family.
He lost Katelyn.
Two of those had been his fault. Merle was another story.
He couldn't believe that Merle had tried to kill Katelyn. What the hell could he have been thinking…and why? That's the part he didn't understand, was why. It didn't make any sense to him. He couldn't fathom why Merle would hate her so much. They just met. He didn't know her. So what if he didn't like her, but Merle hated everyone and he didn't try to kill them.
Maybe the Governor had changed Merle…for the worse. If that were possible.
If Daryl was going to be honest with himself, he had to admit that Merle had always been a wicked bastard. He couldn't think of anything redeemable about him really. Maybe his courage. Merle was a brave SOB, but nothing else really. He was tough, but that had also made him mean, and he didn't know anybody meaner than Merle.
But Daryl wanted more.
He wasn't interested in just surviving anymore. He wanted happiness. He had touched happiness, with Kate, but he'd thrown it away. He'd been so scared she'd reject him, that he'd run. Maybe Merle's courage wasn't real. Real courage, was being able to love, and risk the possibility of pain. Merle cut off that possibility out of fear of pain, and that wasn't bravery. That was fear.
Merle Dixon was afraid.
Daryl swallowed, thinking back to all the time he'd spent as a kid, looking up to Merle. He'd thought he was what real men were supposed to be like. Angry and mean, battling everyone, clawing your way through, but he'd tasted real love. He knew there was more to life.
"Shit!" Daryl swore, looking around the empty house.
He had to go back.
###############################################################################
Packed in 2 SUV's and a station wagon, the group of survivors made their way through the mess of cars slowly. They'd found lots of dead, and only a handful of walkers, but they were able to resupply just about everything they needed from the throng of cars with luggage. Emptying the gas tanks, they filled their portable ones, and loaded them into the back of the SUV's. They'd be able to make it two or three days without having to find more, but kept their eyes out for possible fill up spots just to be sure.
Katelyn was still struggling with keeping food down and Carol grew more and more worried as the days went on. Turning off at an exit for a small town, Rick and Tyreese headed into the grocery store with Maggie and Glenn following behind. Carol took the opportunity to go talk to Hershel privately.
"Hershel. Can I speak with you?" Carol asked quietly, coming up to him.
"Sure Carol. What d'ya need?" He asked congenially.
"You noticed how sick Katelyn's been?" She asked softly.
Hershel paused, looking at Carol, as he went back through the events in his head.
"I know she's been sick off and on but honestly, with everything going on, I hadn't thought much of it, other than to make sure she's getting some food." Hershel stated, searching Carol's face for clues as to what she was getting at.
"Do you think she's pregnant?" Carol whispered, looking around to make sure no one was near them.
Hershel thought hard, his mouth tightening in concentration.
"That's a good question. She's been eating better. I just assumed she was so distraught over what happened, she just got depressed and sick. I'm not sure she can get pregnant, Carol, but we should probably find out." Hershel said thoughtfully, looking over toward Katelyn who was sitting in the back of the car, leaning her head against the window frame.
"I'll go talk to her. You go find a test." Hershel said, beginning to move toward Katelyn with his awkward gate.
He walked by Carl who was holding the baby and took a deep breath. It was already hard with one baby, but two…that was gonna be hell.
Carol walked inside the grocery store and made her way casually toward the pharmacy. Climbing over piles of things people just threw on the floor, she didn't hear Glenn approaching.
"What are you looking for?" Glenn asked, walking up to Carol.
Carol was startled and Maggie smirked at the guilty look on her face.
"Someone looks guilty." She commented, playfully elbowing Carol.
Carol looked around frantically, not wanting anyone else to hear.
"Shhh." She hushed, causing Maggie to realize it was serious.
"What's going on?" Maggie asked, looking at Glenn with a worried expression.
"I think we have a problem." Carol whispered, looking over her shoulder to make sure no one was watching.
"I think Katelyn's pregnant." She said quietly.
Maggie and Glenn fell silent, shocked expressions plastered across their faces.
"Shit!" Glenn hissed, trying to be quiet, but he was less than pleased.
"How?" Maggie demanded, feeling stupid after she asked.
Carol glared at her lopsidedly, like, "Really? You need to ask that?"
"Sorry. I mean I know how…but how?" Maggie rephrased.
"I don't know. I would have thought they'd been careful, but then again, I've never seen Daryl Dixon walking around with condoms." Carol said.
"What if its food poisoning or something?" Glenn asked, digging through stuff laying around in the aisle.
"For four weeks?" Maggie asked, laughing at him.
"Okay, but they weren't together that long and…" Glenn paused, finding a box marked EPT.
"It only takes once, genius." Maggie snorted, throwing at box of pads at his head.
"Hershel wants me to grab one of those. He's talking to Katelyn now." Carol stated before continuing, "Just keep it quiet for now, okay?"
They both nodded and headed toward the back of the store to round up other supplies.