I know it's been a while. I am sorry about that. Hope you'll like it!

Chapter 4

Kara was telling Kacey a story using a rag doll to illustrate the heroine's numerous exploits. It had taken them a long time to assure themselves of her mother's fate but they had finally found all the corps, and unfortunately she had been among them. This new development was not something she had expected. She might have wished it those first days after the rescue. At that time the loss of Kacey had been so new and raw that in her rage she had thought that if Kacey's mother had died on New Caprica then she would still be blissfully happy. She wouldn't be alone. But she had come to deal with the loss, had met Kacey's mother and spent a lot of time with the both of them. She had lost a friend today and Kacey the most important person in her life. How in hell were you supposed to tell a two-year old that her mommy was dead and not coming back?

Kacey must have sensed that something was bothering her because she felt a tug on her arm.

"Honey, is something wrong?"

"Mama?" Oh, crap! She had to give the kid credit. She knew how to go straight to the heart of the matter.

"I am sorry sweetie, mama is not here." Obviously that was not the answer she had been waiting for. Knowing that she would have to tell her at one time or another, she thought why not now?

"Kacey did mama ever talk to you about the Gods?" No answer.

"Well the gods are very powerful people. They've created a very beautiful place called Elysian field where brave people can rest forever." She watched Kacey's face trying to detect a hint of understanding. She seemed to follow the story so she decided to go on.

"Your mama went to that place because she was very tired."

"Why?" Oh gods! It wouldn't be as simple as she had hoped.

"Do you remember what happened yesterday?"

"Fire!"

"Yes there was a fire, and you got hurt." She nodded. "And after you were really tired and took a long nap." Another nod. "Well your mama was really, really hurt and she needed to go to that special place I told you of, so she could rest forever." Kacey' face was blank. She obviously did not understand what it implied.

"Mama is not coming back Kacey. Ever." She told her softly. It seemed to her that Kacey was trying to decide whether she was lying or telling the truth. She took her by surprise when she said:

"No Mama?"

"Yes Kacey, no mama." Her eyes filled with tears and it broke Kara's heart. She gathered the child in her arms and rocked her, holding her tight trying to sooth her pain.

"Where have you been?"

Oh gods! He was too tired for that.

"Sickbay, hangar deck, CIC…" Dee was glaring at him and when he did not elaborate, she screamed.

"Don't be a smart ass! You could have at least told me you were fine. For all I knew you could have been hurt or worth!"

"Look I am sorry! Ok? It was crazy out there, I didn't have time!" She got even more furious.

"Of course you didn't have time! Poor stupid me, you were too occupied taking care of Kara Thrace!"

"What the frack are you talking about?!"

"Oh so you did not spend the last hours in sickbay with her?"

She was jealous! His sweet, even tempered wife was jealous; and it annoyed him. He felt as if she had no right to be, he hadn't done anything to induce this kind of reaction.

"Yes I was in sickbay. Helping a child and being treated! What? Did you think I would be involved in a trist with Kara Thrace in the middle of an attack?" The look on her face said it all.

"Look Ana I am too tired for that right now. I am going back to the pilots' bunkroom for a while. Let me know when you're once again rational, ok?"

He did not bothered to wait for an answer, grabbed his gear and left.

Ana had saved him from desperation when Kara had broken his heart. She was always there for him no matter what! And he often felt like a bastard knowing that he did not love her the way she deserved. He cared about her a great deal. He even loved her but was not in love with her. Until the rescue it had been easy to forget, at times he had even been able to convince himself that their marriage was all that he had ever wanted: an uncomplicated, steady and safe relationship. But Kara was no longer inaccessible. He saw her everyday and each time the feelings he had tried so hard to bury came back to the surface a little stronger, a little harder to ignore.

Ana must have sensed it and now she feared loosing him. It was a perfectly natural reaction he reasoned. But he was not ready to face it; he was not be able to answer her questions when he himself did not know the responses.

"Kara, are you sure you want to do that?"

"A battlestar is not a place to raise a child Admiral. You know that."

"Our circumstances have changed. A lot of crew members are raising children here." Seeing that she was about to interrupt him he held a finger up. "Hear me out Kara! The family quarters are almost ready and people are organizing a daycare system. So yes maybe a battlestar is not the best place to raise a little girl but it's not the worst either. Beside Kacey has already been living here for a while now…"

"Yeah right!" she sniggered "sleeping on a cot on a greasy hangar deck."

"People are doing the best they can with what they have Kara. And right now our most precious processions are our families and friends. Who will be there to help you if you leave Galactica?" She looked away.

"It's not like I have a lot of friends right now anyway, sir."

"Well you still have your family here! No matter what happens Lee and I are your family. You know that Kara?"

"I…It's not that simple sir." She sighed.

"Give me your eyes Kara" he said softly. "You know maybe, just maybe it is that simple." Seeing her confusion he explained. "Maybe you just have to let people be there for you Kara. Everybody needs help sometimes and there is no shame in admitting it." She did not answer. "Think about it Kara. I'll give you a pass for cloud nine, you can stay there for a while and come to term with everything."

"Thank you sir."

"Don't go yet. I have something for you." He went to his desk and took one of the books lying there. "I haven't been around much while Lee and Zack were growing up but there is one thing I remember. Whenever I was on leave I would tuck them in for the night and then read them a bedtime story. It was our special time." He put the book in her hands. "I hope you'll do it for Kacey." It was a beautiful book, leather bound with colorful illustrations. The kid would love it. But somehow it felt wrong to be accepting something that should only be given to a family member.

"I can't! You should give this book to Lee not to me."

"Lee will understand, he stopped asking for a bedtime story twenty years ago." That made her smile. Just the idea of a small black haired boy waiting with his favorite stuff animal in his arms for his father to read him a story, was doing weird things to her stomach.

"If it can make you feel better about it, you can give it to Lee once he has children."

"Alright, I'll take it then."

TBC...