Ren rubbed his temples, taking the stairs up to his apartment. His feet dragged. He had bad days before. Before finding his Katsuki, there were a few bad days. When he first came to Japan, he had months worth of bad days. Today weighed in his mind unlike all others though. For the first time since arriving to Japan, his acting had failed. Not by his own problems, but by outside circumstances. It was more frustrating than anything, and it weighed him down.

Yesterday was a semi-normal day. He was working on a TV drama. Staff and actors there were all showbiz veterans. They had both complained loudly about the depreciation of media and made fun of the rag magazines. They never paid much attention to the gossip columns, and he was there to enjoy their silence all day. One of the employees had actually came up to him and encouraged him. "I doubt that I need to tell you this sir, but the staff wants you to know; even if you were gay, you're still the best actor out there Tsugura-san and that's all that matters." Everything had ran smoothly, even if there hadn't been much success on the matter of his kohai. He almost forget about the rest of the world.

Today he had given some publicity interviews, and he had a model shoot for a new cologne. It was his first day back in the public eye as Tsuruga Ren. He was reminded that the acting world was not all about talent and skill.

When he entered the new studio, the set was much more subdued than he expected. He was use to excited whispers of the female staff members, but instead of squeals, whenever he walked past they broke out in tears. He could catch phrases like "such a shame" and "all the best ones." The men however, openly snickered at him. He wouldn't crack under their jest, he had dealt with jealous comments of men almost all his life.

It was his job that got under his skin. By the end of the shoot, he was feeling more than a little frustrated. No matter what he did, the director had asked him for "more masculine," and told him he looked too "poised" and "soft." He had several wardrobe changes, but all the outfits picked the photographer had casted off as too "floaty." Several hours of shooting had past, and the director wasn't happy. He told Tsugura that he wouldn't need to worry about coming back to re-shoot. He said he would pick the best out shots, but the actor knew he probably was going to find another assuredly straight male model. It was the first time he was taken off the job in a long time, and it hadn't lost its sting.

The interviews hadn't gone much better. He didn't realize how many ways an interviewer could ask "Are you homosexual?" and hear "No, I'm not" as "Maybe, you should keep asking." Ren's cheeks hurt from holding his gentlemanly smile for so long. He never thought Actor X would be a welcomed reprieve from his main stage name, but it was.

Yashiro however, took the day much better than he expected. When Ren had asked for energy bar for lunch, Yashiro left and took about forty minutes to get back. He had asked where his manager had gone all that time, but the only response was "traffic" and a suspicious smile.

In the car Yashiro had complained loudly about the narrow-mindedness of the industry, but he always turned the conversation over to Kyoko in one way or another.

"Wouldn't it be nice to have Kyoko-chan make you a bento box? I'm sure the rice would have a pink heart and everything."

"That soda they had in the studio was pretty good. Kyoko-chan was in that soda commercial, wasn't she?"

"It was nice talking to Kyoko-chan. She gets prettier every day."

"You should appeal to Kyoko-chan's sensitive side. She likes taking care of you."

The simple mention of her seemed to perk his manager up, but for once, he frowned at the thought of her. Whenever he thought of her, he thought of the stupid challenge. He had worked so hard to get ahead in this field. He had meant what he said about not wanting to push Kyoko into anything, but he also didn't want to go back home over something as stupid as this. Acting was a part of him as much as her presence was. If he failed this, he could kiss everything he worked for goodbye. For the first time, he wanted to call his father and ask for advice.

Ren entered his apartment, surprised by the scent of the dinner wafting through the air. He looked down by the doorway and spotted a small pair of fashionable ruby heels already there, used but well kept. Ren remembered those heels vividly, walking down the straight line as he had taught his model to do. His lips curved in a small smile.

"Tadaima," Ren said, making extra attention to shut the door loudly enough for her to hear. He felt a bit strange saying that in his own apartment, but it had a strange pleasance as it rolled off the tongue.

"Okaeri" Kyoko responded, popping her head from out from the kitchen. "I hope you don't mind hot pot. I thought it would be nice with the frigid weather lately. Yashiro-san let me borrow a key and told me to make sure you ate properly tonight."

Of course he did… I gave him that key in case of an emergency…

Ren sighed at his manager's antics, and she visibly deflated. "Do you not like hot pot Tsuruga-san? I could make something else if you'd like."

"No no, Mogami-san. Hot pot sounds delicious. You're right about how cold it's gotten recently." He took off his jacket and hung it up, before joining her in the kitchen. She was wearing a chef's apron, and several pans were on the stove. "You really didn't have to do this however."

"I wanted to. Yashiro-san says you've slipped back into eating only energy bars and convenience store snacks. You need to take care of yourself properly Tsuruga-san, or you'll get sick again." She frowned at him, and he found himself chuckling. She was a bit like a mother hen. Always worrying about what he ate. It felt good to smile again.

He watched her finish frying some omelets before wrapping them expertly into two bento boxes.

"Wouldn't it be nice to have Kyoko make you a bento box? I'm sure the rice would have a pink heart and everything!"

He shook his head at his managers words and peered into tomorrow's lunch. It was quite expertly made, but the rice was all white in both settings. Apparently she wanted to make sure he and his manager ate well part of tomorrow too. He pulled back and watched her lean over to taste the broth. Her pale white neck peeked through her growing hair.

The Emperor flickered beneath his skin. He wondered what she would do if he snuck behind her, pulled her back into his embrace, and kissed her neck? If he did that, he could win her over. He was well experienced with women. He could claim her as his own.

Mentally, he smacked himself. This was Kyoko he was thinking about. She probably throw the pot of hot broth on him, and run like the wind. He'd deserve it too.

"Do you need any help Mogami-san?"

"I'm almost done." She said, stirring the pot. "Feel free to rest."

"I'll set the table then."

The tinkle of dishes and pots were the only sounds that filled the apartment. The silence was comfortable, and he was distracted by the meal once set out on the table. He forgot how wonderful of a cook she was. His appetite always increased when it was something she made from scratch. Having her there felt calming, like balm on a fresh burn.

"How'd the taping go today, Mogami-san?" He asked her, looking up from his mostly empty plate.

"Quite well, thank you. Director Sato is quite a perfectionist, but she seemed very pleased." Kyoko smiled as she usually did after a hard day's work. He felt his heart lift.

"How did you learn to play the cello that quickly?"

"I don't know how to play the cello. I only learned how to play that part of the piece." She held up her hands and crossed them repeatedly in denial.

He shook his head. "You played it like a professional. It was quite impressive."

"Wakeshima-san showed me how she played during breaks. She's very pretty, kind, talented and a good teacher."

"Still, one doesn't go from not knowing how to hold a bow to playing a complicated piece like that." He pressed on. He wasn't sure why he did, but Ren felt like there was something hidden beneath her shy answers. She sighed.

"I use to spend a lot of time at an inn in Kyoto. They had a sankyoku every so often to come play for the most important guests. A few times the players would show me how to use their instruments in the garden."

His eyes widened. He remembered how she pretended to play the cello in the car. So she was remembering her childhood.

"Oh, I see. So you were use to a bow and strings instrument. Did you enjoy it?" He asked. Her smile returned.

"Very much. I especially enjoyed the sound of a Shamisen."

"Did you ever dream of being a professional musician?"

The silence was louder this time, much more pronounced. It didn't feel quite like an inquisitive pause. Her face showed the pain of a person remembering a long buried, painful past.

"When I was little…I remember walking down the street to school. I saw a geisha. I remember wanting to be one…"

A small child walks along a paved road alone, holding a large plain black umbrella obviously too big for her. She holds it sideways, using it to try and shield herself from the heavy rain and the gusts of wind. Her forest green school uniform and long black twin tails are already soaked, and she's near tears.

Lost in the worsening storm, she starts to cry, and wipes her wet cheeks away with one of her damp sleeves. In her other hand, the umbrella is batted by the wind, and ripped from her fingers.

"Oh no! Mother's umbrella!"

She chases the black object down the street, splashing through piles of muck and puddles. Her small arms reach for rain shield, but the blustery weather lifts it above her grasp. It ripped on branches and finally gets stuck between against a window at a large inn.

The young girl goes up to the fancy door, and calls out. Hearing no answer, she lets herself in to retrieve her mother's umbrella.

Standing in awe, she drinks in the sight of the tall graceful woman at the end of the long hallway. The woman is painted white, with a complicated hairstyle, ruby red lips, and dressed in long flowing material. Her voice sounds like the tinkle of bells, and the small female is mesmerized. After experiencing nothing but the basics all her short life, the woman down the hall is like a colourblind child seeing a rainbow for the first time.

She doesn't notice the little boy, pale from sickness, come down the side stairwell. He sees the small girl, and then looks to see what she's staring at.

"Haven't you ever seen a geisha?" The boy asks, snapping her back to reality.

He saw women dressed like that all his life. He didn't think anything special about them. Their music was so boring and all they did was talk about how cute he was.

"No. What's a geisha?" The girl asks curiously, looking at the boy in eagerness.

"Well..." The young boy crossed his arms and lowered his head in thought. "She's like a pretend princess. She wears makeup, plays music, and acts pretty."

"Wow," the young girl awed in amazement. She glanced again at the painted breathing figure, being led out of view. "A princess must be extra amazing then!"

"Don't you even know what a princess is?" The girl shakes her head in confusion. "You don't know anything, do you?" The boy smiled, opening the door wider. He didn't get to meet many children his age at the inn. She looked dirty and seemed dumb, but nice. "I'm Fuwa Shoutaro. You can call me Sho. What's your name?"

"Mogami. Mogami Kyoko," she said brightly, a large smile blossoming over her young face. "Nice to meet you, Sho-chan!"

Everything started sliding into place now for him. Her love of makeup. Her perfect posture. Her skilled bows, the expertise at performing traditional tea ceremonies, and the ability to hide her discomfort in a professional setting.

"Did you ever think of joining a kaburenjo?" Ren asked, breaking her mental trip down memory lane.

She nodded her head, her eyes downcast.

"You need to have…parental approval in order for a geisha house to accept your application. My mother…wasn't supportive on the idea." Her voice trailed away. She took a moment to compose herself, lifting her head with a forced smile. "That's okay though. I wouldn't have been very good at it anyways. I had lots of fun at the inn and it was like training in a way."

Standing up, she started clearing away the plates and returned to the kitchen.

He had pushed too much. Ren wanted to apologize. He could go in there and hug her, which would get her mind off things, but probably give her an aneurism. He could laugh it off, like he had with the Valentine's debacle. That was too cruel. He'd think of something to make it up to her.

"Mogami-san?" He called, deciding.

"Hai Tsuruga-san?" She called from the kitchen, above the sound of water rushing.

"Call me Ren."

He heard only silence, and then the breaking of dishes.

****

kaburenjo -- a school dedicated to the training of geisha.

I personally think it makes sense, but feel free to disagree. This was suppose to be a comedy, but things turned out so serious!