Terms to know: The literal translation of Seme is "Attacker" or the Pursuer and Uke means "Receiver" or the Pursued. If you're aware of the context this is usually in, you probably already have an idea of what's coming.
And yes, I've read and watched them all. Three points if you have too. Five if you get Yashiro's badge reference. Runa beta'ed, and I couldn't thank her more. (Of course, I still tweaked things, so any errors are my own.)
Ren had never been inside his manager's apartment before. It wasn't that Yashiro barred him from entering; it was just that there was never the opportunity to see inside. He valued punctually just as much as Ren did. Usually Yashiro waited in front of his building in the morning and hopped out at night. Both went about their private lives separately. On the few occasions they did decide to keep each other company, it was commonly somewhere public like a restaurant or bar. In a strange way, Ren was glad he was finally able to see what his manager called home.
"Make yourself comfortable Ren. I'm just trying to find something more suitable for today." Yashiro called out from behind his bedroom wall.
It was a pretty big apartment by Tokyo's standards. It was on upper floor with a nice view, located in an affluent neighborhood, and looked well maintained. Everything was new and shiny. From the light bamboo furniture, to the rice paper blinds and the tatami mat flooring, everything screamed Japanese traditional. The few electronics Yashiro owned looked out of place, and almost every one of them (excluding his laptop) was wrapped in a thin layer of plastic. Apparently no electronic was safe from his curse.
"Why does everything I own look so old?"
What surprised Ren was his bookshelf. Not really a bookshelf, but a wall of nothing but shelves. All dedicated to manga, with a few anime figurines strategically placed. The books were a multitude of baby blues, duck yellows, spring greens, and other florescent colours. They were all alphabetized too. Obviously well cared for, some showed signs of handling, while others sat with the price stickers still on. He ran his finger along the horizontal titles of various volumes.
Boys Over Flowers. Card Captor Sakura. Fruits Basket. Fushigi Yuugi. Hana-Kimi. Kaichou wa Maid-sama. Kimi Ni Todoke. Marmalade Boy. Ouran High School Host Club. Sailor Moon. (Ren winced. That was one he'd heard of.) Shugo Chara. Vampire Knight.
Only one laid out of place. Pink and bright, he could read the book's spine from across the room. Sukippu Bito: Volume one. He went to pick it up, but the sliding shoji screen opened, diverting his attention.
"Done! I can't believe this still fits me…"
The first thing Ren noticed was the glasses. Mainly the lack of them. Without them his manager looked much younger, though with them Yashiro barely looked older than him anyways. His hair was also different. Usually combed and neatly flattened, now it was meticulously messy with the perfect amount of gel to hold it in place. It was the outfit however, that really made him change. The black pants, steel blue shirt, and gray tie were normal enough, but it was the jacket that did it.
"Isn't that a school uniform?" Ren deadpanned, pointing to the golden coat of arms on his white jacket pocket. The emblem had angel wings, and a "S-A" embroidered within the middle. He was sure no jacket like that was ever made for street wear. "Yashiro...Are you trying to make me look like a pedophile too ?"
"I don't look that young," Yashiro muttered, fixing the gray tie that went around his shirt collar. "Besides..." the manager added cheekily, a bemused grin rising on his face. "I would have thought you'd appreciate the irony of a high school uniform."
Ren glared.
"Oh, and call me by my first name Ren. No one is going to believe us if they hear us formally addressing each other."
"I thought this was just to attract attention Yukihito." Ren rolled the name off his tongue sarcastically. "I think going out with any male is going to attract attention. Being believable doesn't matter."
"All I know is that if I'm going to embarrass myself for your sake, I'm going to do it right." Yashiro said firmly. He walked to the bookshelf, and delicately placed Sukippu Bito back in its rightful place. "This is probably the only time I'll be able to put any of my literature to personal use, and I want to be assured Kyoko hears what you want to say." Pulling out one of his treasured collection, he thumbed through the pages for a useful reference. "Now since you're Japan's number one actor, base your character on this."
Knocking lightly and hearing nothing, the beautiful manager entered the Queen Records' private guestroom. Well decorated and comfortable, it was the common crashing place for musicians who needed a break during recording sessions. Since Sho was one of those types, he was well aware of the hotel-like arrangements. It was the only place he could have meant. She figured he'd be in the room, sleeping the night off.
The room was empty, but only of people. The place looked like a whirlwind hit it. The pillows and bed sheets were thrown every which way. Soda cans sat haphazardly on flat surfaces. A few pieces of furniture were overturned. And then there was the paper. Papers were sprawled all over the room. Some left crumpled by the waste basket, some left knocked over by the desk. It was a white, crinkled carpet.
In the middle of the table sat the only stack of papers that looked organized. It naturally drew her in; the only sense of order to an otherwise chaotic room. Making sure to tiptoe around the litter, she made her way to the table and sat on the edge of his couch. She took the pile of papers and brought it into focus. It was in English, but the words were in noble calligraphy.
Odes For The Mogamigawa
She knew what the Mogami River was. It was a large river, not too far from her hometown. "For" and "The" was easy enough to understand too. It was the word "ode" that confused her. Determined to figure out the title, Shoko pulled out her cell phone and typed "ode" into the internet search bar.
"An ode is typically a lyrical verse written in praise of, or dedicated to someone or something which captures the poet's interest."
Lyrics? ...No way…is this a new album? She shuffled through the seventy or so pages that made up the set. Some had tired, crooked lines, in the same messy way he usually wrote his lyrics. Most had sheet music, neatly penned, full of crescendos and directive notes for the band.
He did this all in one night? How? Why?
Pulling out one of the non-musical sheet notes, she browsed over one of the paragraphs at random.
If I took you for granted
I apologize for acting tough
You're my reason for living
And there's no way I'm giving up
The lyrics caught her by surprise. Sho rarely did songs about love, and had never apologized in his songs before. Was this about Kyoko? Quickly shifting the pages around, she came to another page and quickly read it over.
Can't believe I could think that she would just follow me everywhere I go
I wrestle with you in my dreams and wake up making love to a pillow
And I fall asleep and dream of alternate realities
And I put myself at ease by pretending that she still loves me
Blushing deeply, Shoko stopped reading the page there. The lyrics almost felt like his diary, more than just some words put to a song.
There was no way this song could be about anyone other than Kyoko... But where did the Mogami River come into play?
Wanting to make sure she was right, she pulled out the last page.
I'm not fine, I'm in pain
It's harder everyday
Maybe we're better off this way
It's better that we break, baby…
Shoko smiled sadly, and returned the stack to its proper resting place. She should have known Sho would never take no as an answer. If he was determined to apologize, Sho would do it. Stomping through the mess, she switched off the light and went in search of the lyricist.
"If this all works out Ren, I expect the baby to be named after me. And I want to be the godfather." The 'high school' man muttered discreetly, digging deep into his glass to extract some of the caramel syrup.
"Hmm?" Ren made through the sound of his spoon, barely tasting the raspberry mousse pudding.
"No girl will ever want me after this gets out." Yukihito whined, digging into the rest of his extra large, triple chocolate ice cream parfait.
Mindful of watching eyes, Ren clearly saw how many girls had their gaze on his manager, surrounding the security Plexiglas. He tilted his head to the side, pointing them out. "There are plenty of girls watching appreciatively now."
An exclusive dessert café to only the Tokyo elite, the two men sat relatively relaxed at their table, enjoying the sunshine that filtered through the crystal wall. It was a relatively secluded place, with private security that allowed in only the rich and famous. It was one of the few places the pair enjoyed going to whenever they had time to spend between jobs. Ren for the privacy, and Yashiro for his massive sweet tooth.
Still, they had to be seen, and to be seen meant they had to have an audience. Yashiro requested a seat right beside the clear wall; that, along with a simple anonymous phone message to a gossip blog, was all it took. By the time the waiter came around, about a hundred camera phones and noses pressed themselves against the privacy glass. They were sure there'd be thousands more who saw this scene by the time they left, likely on YouTube or Entertainment-Japan. It was akin to being an exotic specimen on a human scale ant farm.
"They're not watching for me. They're squealing about us." Yashiro retorted. He pouted, and the female spectators collectively aw'ed. "I can hear them saying things like "seme" and "uke." Even worse, they're saying I'm the uke."
Ren looked at him, perplexed.
"It's something you have to read about to understand." Yashiro said, blushing lightly and looking away. "Let's just say your plan is working."
"May I remind you this was your idea?" The actor said, mildly amused.
"I was riddled with guilt and alcohol. A manager isn't perfect."
"I don't think I've ever attracted this many people before. Your plan is working perfectly enough."
"I know it is." Yashiro went to push up his glasses, but stopped once he felt his bare face. "My e-mail has been bombarded with talk show requests. Your LME fan-page has five times the usual viewers today, and it's only eleven am. It seems the shoneni-ai culture is still going strong. Still Ren..." He dropped his voice. "The fact you're willing to go this far surprises even me. For someone who wasn't even willing to entertain the idea of courting you-know-who, the fact you're intentionally causing a media frenzy like this, so that you can confess to one girl in front an entire nation, and say you're willing to quit for her. it's very...well it's not like you. Romantic, but a little..." There was a pause to search for the right word. "...maladroit. Clumsy."
Ren looked at his 'date' with mild surprise. Clumsy was not a word he ever thought would be attached to his name. Especially regarding romance. Charming the opposite sex was second nature for him. Of course, he had fell for the only one that was impervious to his typical charm. She always left him guessing and scrambling, wondering what he could do to get closer to her. Even now, sitting in a cafe, pretending to be gay, so he could confess to the world his sincerity about her though giving up his biggest desire in life; it was clumsy.
He slowly began to chuckle, which increasingly rose, turning into all-out laughter. Yashiro watched on with nervous surprise, a bit embarrassed at his own words and his charge's response. Ren casually wiped a humored tear away, thinking about how only one week neatly undid his entire life in Japan.
"'If love becomes serious, you'll lose your composure. It makes one not care anymore. Even if…he looks lame and messy'...someone wiser than I told me that...and I'm afraid he's right." Ren repeated the line softly, almost more to himself than to anyone else. Dropping his spoon in his cup, Ren gave one of his heart-stopping smiles, and looked at Yuki. "Shall we move on then?"
"Okay, I guess so." Yashiro sighed. "We told the president we'd do Bridge Rock, and it's best to keep to the schedule."
"Wait," Pulling on the white sleeve before his partner got up from his chair, Ren pointed at Yashiro's face. "You have some cream on your cheek."
"Really?" Yukihito said, reaching up to touch his cheek. He paused, remembering something, then brought his hand back to the table. "Wait…I know this scene. You should wipe off the spot yourself."
The wind blew a plastic wrapper across the scene, a classic touch to Ren's face of bewilderment. "They do that in stories for little girls?" Ren whispered harshly, obviously disarmed at the entire aspect.
"It's for all genre and ages Ren. Just do it. It's not exactly pleasant for me either." Yashiro bent low to look like he was licking his cup, hissing his instruction."Look, I have zero interest in you Ren, but I know this culture." He spoke so softly that the actor couldn't really hear him, but luckily his lips were easy to read. "You want girls talking? You have to do the hallmark things. I'm trying to be the innocent high school boy who loves sweets and is unaware of your pursuit. Now, smirk, lean over the table and flick the cream off with your finger."
Yashiro pulled back, and pretended to lick his spoon. "And make sure you don't blush. You need to look like you're trying to seduce me."
Getting up and leaning forward, Ren's facial features changed. His lips quirked at the edges, smiling in his best predatory grin. Yashiro's cheeks instantly went pink, as Ren's eyes became narrowed in desire, and he leaned over the table.
"You've made a mess again, Yuki..." His deep voice growled, just loud enough so that a few onlookers could hear. Dragging his long finger against the sticky mess, the Emperor dabbed away at the speck of cream from his manager's cheek, and popped the sweet substance in his mouth.
A collective fan-girl squeal erupted from the block, breaking the nearby car windows. Several of the girls in the front fainted, as Yashiro went from pink to boiling tomato red.
I guess I am the uke…
Shoko wandered into the music studio's sound booth, attracted by the red recording light. It was pretty rare for one to record on a Friday. She had walked along most of the halls of Queen Records, and she hadn't seen one more scratch of proof that Sho was still in the building, This was one of the few places she hadn't checked.
I asked her to stay but she wouldn't listen
She left before I had the chance to say
The words that would mend, the things that were broken
But now it's far too late, she's gone away
She had worked with him for more than a year. She had seen the improvement he had achieved all throughout his career. He had small increments of improvements during the time, and he had jumps, like after the situation with Vie Ghoul. But this, the sound of his voice was nothing likehe had ever done before.
Every night you cry yourself to sleep
Thinking "Why does this happen to me?
Why does every moment have to be so hard?"
Hard to believe that
He cradled the hanging microphone like a butterfly, as if it were the only thing that mattered. It was touchingly beautiful yet heart wrenching, to see his face and his voice cry out in such an affectionate way. The band behind him played in awe, unable to fall out of step with his melody.
It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you
So enthralled by Fuwa's tender performance, the twin sound technicians didn't notice her enter. She had to tap the two men on the shoulder, and only then did they swivel in their chairs. Like most people who've been cooped up together in a confined space for long periods of time, the two were tuned into each other's thoughts, and played their conversations off each other.
"Aki-san? You're finally here."
"What happened to Fuwa?"
"Yeah, it's like he's went through a transformation."
"He called everyone up personally, and asked us if we could come in and work with him on his new album."
Of all the things I felt but never really shown
Perhaps the worst is that I ever let you go
I should not ever let you go
"The kid is crazy for thinking he can hammer out a CD in a week, and a new single by the end of today. Still…I have to give him credit."
"Yeah, I've never heard him like this before. Whatever touched him, it really hit him hard."
"It's like he's singing his heart out."
I won't go home without you…
"His is singing his heart out…" Shoko said, smiling faintly.
I won't go home without you…
As the last chords ran though, Shoko leaned over and pushed a button on the soundboard. The microphone turned on, and she leaned towards it to speak.
"Twenty minutes guys. Take a break…and good job."
As the band exited, they patted the singer on the back, congratulating him on the passionate performance. Sho took it all with an acknowledging nod, much different than the aloof, confident act he used to play. She had to admit it impressed her.
Walking out last, Sho looked at Shoko and smiled at her wearily. He wore tired circles around his eyes, but his expression had changed from last night. It was like his heart was lighter, after pouring his emotion into his voice.
"Come on Sho, let's get you something to eat."
News Flash: TsuruGAY Ren Suspected Of Coming Out The Closet!
"Manami, stop crying! It's not the end of the world!" The male host looked at his co-host with thinly veiled annoyance, edging away from the saltwater puddle that slowly made its way towards his side.
Manami banged her fists on the fake wood table, in the middle of throwing a tantrum on live TV."Of course it is, Kenta! It's the end of my dream world!"
A collage of photos ran through the screen, one where the two men were going shopping, entirely too close to be publicly appropriate, another where they were entering an unidentified apartment together, and the last one a grainy camera video shot of Ren wiping the cream off the other man's cheek.
The hostess openly wailed as the camera panned back to her, mascara and heavy makeup washing down her face. "It's so not fair! It's noooooot faaaaaair! Why is it all the cute ones?"
"You know Manami" Kenta swiveled to face her with a charming smile, cupping her hands in comfort. "I'm single and I'm interested in women."
Manami tears stifled a bit, looking over at her grinning co-host. Her lip quivered and she took a wavering breath, before promptly starting to wail again. Shrugging at the rejection, the camera zoomed on the male announcer.
"Well we know that Tsuruga Ren will be appearing on LME's Bridge Rock to make an announcement at seven pm tonight. We're sure everyone will be tuning in to confirm what we think we're seeing! See you then!"
Both manager and charge dropped their trays, slack jawed.
A/N: I've been writing a chapter before this, but I just can't seem to get it right. So I decided to scrap it. You guys don't need to read more sadness. I hope this didn't cause any tears. I might make all the "deleted scenes" an omake at the end of the story. I've actually written quite a bit in past chapters which I've decided to scrap. It'd be interesting to make them a side story, right? (Although the ending still feels a bit far off.)
I'm kinda socially awkward...and I want to apologize...but I'm really nervous..so I'll dedicated this chapter to that person in hopes they know I appreciate every criticism and review they give me, and I am going to reference the fact the actress is acting as a "beard" somehow in future chapters.
I love all my reviewers. Especially ones that come back after long periods of time or write lengthy reviews to what they like or don't like. I don't feel I'm nearly as good of a writer as some of you say. I'm just sharing some amusing daydreams. Thank you for making this my most reviewed story.
"Remise en question" by Hermi-ko is the French translation of Batting For The Other Team, so if you read or like to pretend you can read French (like me), go and take a look! Thanks Hermi-ko!
All lyrics belong to Maroon 5 and their respected media giants. (I've actually imagined Sho sounding like this particular singer. *nervous laughter*) In order of reference "Back At Your Door," "Can't Stop," "Better That We Break" and "Won't Go Home Without You." Happy Halloween!