Summary:

Tsunade and Uchiha Mikoto has devised a plan in order to bring two unlikely people together. All they ask is for Sakura to write to Itachi every week until he comes home from a mission until their engagement is finalized. It should be simple...right?

To Uchiha Itachi, With Love

Letter 2:

Dear Uchiha Itachi,

Well, I must say that I am very surprised that you wrote me back.

No, let me rephrase that.

What was REALLY surprising was the twenty bundles of roses on my doorstep this morning. Really, Uchiha! (Erratic scribble of damnit is in the margins before it is marked through.) Was it really necessary to send that many roses? And why on Earth are you sending me roses anyway?

(Undecipherable scribble is in the margin before letter continue.)

Keep in mind, Uchiha.

This. Does. Not. Change. Anything.

I don't know who told you that I love roses, (the words Ino, Naruto, and Sasuke are going to die is scratched through repeatedly.) but I will be sure to thank them.

Also, what do you mean Kakashi sensei told you some valuable information about me? I honestly can't think of anything that I have done that he would be able to tell you and why on Earth are you asking about me anyway!

Ugh, this arranged marriage is driving me (the words psycho, mental, deranged are scratched out) crazy.

Speaking of crazy, (bold line is drawn to the Dear Uchiha part above),your mother and father came by for tea the other day.

Care to tell me why you haven't been writing your mother?

I understand that you are (a forty year old man still living at home with his parents is smeared) a young man who is old enough to take care of himself but do please, try to write to your mother. Not only are you driving her insane with worry but SHE is driving me insane by trying to push this arranged marriage thing!

Speaking of this arranged marriage thing, your teammate, Hana, offered her congratulations about the wedding. I wasn't sure if I wanted to punch her through a wall or run away in tears. I don't know what the Uchiha tribe, yes I said tribe, are telling people but this is not a REAL marriage.

Also, maybe I should mention again that your mother and father "stopped by" for tea with my parents and I, the other day.

It started off pleasant enough. Your mother inquired about me working at the hospital and she praised me for being promoted to assistant director of the hospital but then your father had to cut in.

Not only did he state that I am to give up being a kuniochi but I am expected to be pregnant within the first year of marriage?

Seriously?

What century does your father live in?

Well, he wasn't too happy with my response of "when hell freezes over." He continued to persist until I decided to end the discussion with a blow to the table with my pinkie finger.

Needless to say, tea was abruptly ended once the crater appeared in the ground.

Your mother seemed to be overjoyed with the er-crater and kept sprouting off adjectives such as "youthful, strong, Uchiha babies."

Your father abruptly made an exit but I can't help but to feel overwhelming concern for him. (Yes, that was sarcasm)

Oh well. He will just have to live with it.

Since your mother insist we keep this letter thing going, I am going to give some medic tips so you can be safe through the duration of your trip because if you die I will find you and kill you again.

Medic Tips:

#1- Don't die.

#2- Be sure to wash behind your ears and wear clean underwear like a good little boy.

#3- Pull the stick out of your ass and live a little. You can't be all Uchiha 24/7.

Okay, I am going to end this letter thing now. It is getting to long and I am starting to feel awkward.

Shannaro,

Haruno Sakura

Notes: Thanks to all who faved and alerted the story so responses are appreciated. Also, I would like to note that flames will not be allowed. If you feel my story or this pairing is not to your liking then please do not read it. It is genuinely disheartening to get a review from someone stating that my pairing makes them want to puke and that Itachi would never pick Sakura because she is a pig? Seriously, understand that this story is a work of fiction, which means it is a made up story not canon and of course Itachi can't chose Sakura because he is dead.