Chapter 6
"You betrayed me again." The words, accompanied by an ice cold stare, would have taken all the breath from Helena's lungs if that hadn't already been accomplished by Myka's forearm.
Helena opened her mouth to respond but coughs, rather than words escaped her throat. She reached her hands up to wrap them around the fist at her collar but their progression was stopped by a "Don't."
"Myka-" She heard Pete begin but the agent holding her body hostage showed no sign that she heard her partner. "Myka, maybe we should give her a chance to explain." Helena nodded and coughed in agreement.
Her captor did not move or speak. Bravely, Helena lifted her eyes and stared back. And she did not like what she saw in her wild eyes. "If you'll only let me…" She sputtered, pleading with her brown eyes.
She watched as Pete's hand came to wrap around his partner's. "Let her explain." He said gently, one hand on her back, the other prying her fingers loose from Helena's collar. She watched as Myka allowed Pete to remove her hand but the hand holding the tesla did not waver. She looked down to see that her newly unoccupied hand was now clenched in a fist at her side.
"Well. Explain."
"I had only.." She began, her voice still strangled. "I mean it really was quite selfish of me. Not to mention dangerous. It's just…" Myka prodded her cheek with the tesla as if to remind her it was still there. "Well, darling," She felt a sinking feeling as Myka flinched. "I had almost gotten to this man and I thought well, this is it. I snag, we bag and then you two return to tag. And then it will be over. And really this artifact isn't so dangerous and well-"
"Spit it out." Pete prodded from behind her.
"Well, I really, I let him go because of you. So I could spend more time with you, Myka." She turned her eyes downward and braced herself for the negative reaction she was no doubt about to receive.
"Bullshit." She heard Myka reply.
She snapped her head back up. This time Myka refused to meet her eyes. She opened her mouth to reply but closed it, not sure what she could say to convince her.
Pete came to her aid. "Mykes." He said in a gentle voice and met Helena's shocked eyes. "I believe her."
"You do?" She turned her whole body around, her tesla dropping from the spot beside Helena's face.
He nodded. "I do. Look, she has proven herself time and time again. She's given up her life for us in the past. For you. And I trust her. If she says that is what happened well, then, I believe her."
Helena stayed glued to her spot against the wall, almost afraid to breathe. Myka turned around and met her eyes again. "I'm sorry." She whispered dropping her head.
She was barely shocked when she felt a slap on her arm. "How could you be so-" Myka hit her again in the same spot, not hard enough to hurt her. "Stupid. Foolish. Moronic." She hit her one more time. "Ugh. Sometimes you can be a real asshole, HG, you know that?" She ran her fingers through her hair and shoved her tesla in her belt.
Despite the circumstances, Helena felt herself smile a bit at the nickname. It wasn't the first time the other woman had called her that word, or some derivative of the word. She had always found it unusually endearing. Somewhat adorable, sexy even.
"I had only meant to-" She started, pushing herself off the wall with her foot.
"Woah, woah, woah." Pete stepped in front of her waving his hands. "You two need to talk. Obviously. But not while I'm here. Not in the middle of an alley. And…" He reached over toward Myka who tried to slap his hand away and pulled the tesla out of her pants. "Certainly not with any weapons at your disposal." Helena chuckled at Myka's furrowed brow and her arms crossed over her chest. "You too, HG." He turned to her and held out his hand. She scoffed then turned over her firearm with a shake of her head.
Helena stood in front of the door to Myka's room, her fist shaped right hand frozen in mid-air, her free hand sweating at her side and sock clad toes curling beneath her. Taking a deep breath she tightened the muscles in her arm and began to bring it forward but before she could make contact the wooden door swung open before her. She exhaled as her eyes took in the woman standing in front of her. She looked freshly showered, her face pure, her curls appearing damp but orderly. She was dressed similarly to Helena, relaxed jeans and a loose fitting t-shirt. Her eyes bore the same enthralling sparkle.
Giving a tight lipped smile she pulled the door open further and motioned with her free hand. "I thought I heard someone out here. Come on, I ordered pizza."
Taking another deep breath Helena followed her into the room, one foot dragging behind the other. She pushed the door closed behind her.
"I ordered pepperoni. I hope you don't mind, I had a craving." The taller woman shrugged as she sat down on her bed, curling one leg beneath her. Helena stopped next to the bed somewhat shuffling her feet against the carpet. "Sit. Eat." Myka moved the box making a spot next to her on the bed. She opened the box and picked up a piece then offered a piece to Helena. "Don't make me eat this all by myself. God knows I will." She chuckled.
Helena returned her smile. "Thank you." She took the pizza from her hand, took a bite and sighed. "Heavenly."
"Right?" Myka nodded then laughed. "I always found it funny how much you despise most modern food but somehow love pizza."
Helena joined her laughter. "Its exquisiteness cannot be denied, I'm afraid." The laughter died off and they were left finishing their pizza in companionable silence.
"So, what exactly have you been doing while you've been away?" Myka asked wiping her hands.
"Oh, odds and ends, darling." HG answered.
"Always a mystery." Myka said softly.
Helena chuckled. "I'm freelancing for the Regents, so to speak. Urgent, top secret, dangerous, the usual order." She stretched her legs out in front of her on the bed and leaned back on her hands.
Her companion did not respond. HG recognized the familiar look of concentration on her face, eyes cast downward, brow furrowed, bottom lip between her teeth. "Darling?" She placed a hand on her knee, prepared for her leg to retract from her touch. It didn't.
Myka raised her eyes. "Did you-" She started then shut her mouth. "Did you have a choice?"
This time it was Helena who did not respond.
"HG?" She prodded.
"Myka, I-" She pushed her hair back and then let it fall into her face again. "I can assure you that my wishes figured very minimally into the Regents' decision to pull me away from the Warehouse."
Myka raised an eyebrow. "And your wishes?"
She chose her next words carefully. "You have to understand that I had been, quite literally, on my own for some time." She sighed. "After everything which had transpired- everything I had done- for you to welcome me into your forgiving arms so willingly- I had never, still have never, experienced anything quite like that before. The intensity which you loved me, Myka, which I loved you- I was scared. So when the Regents approached me I- I did not protest. And I'm sorry." She sought the other woman's eyes, which met hers, unabashed. She found unexpected warmth and understanding in their emerald depths.
She did not say anything so Helena continued. "I thought that perhaps I would experience this new world and perhaps become lost within its depths. That maybe I could forget about everything I had done and everything I had felt. It was cowardly of me." She moved her hand from Myka's knee and took her hand in her own. "I was wrong of course. Of every wrong I have committed, the one I hate most is leaving you."
Myka looked down at their hands before bringing her free hand on top of her ex-lover's. When she spoke it was barely audible, "You're always in the back of my mind." Helena's heart momentarily paused. She looked up then and met her eyes. "Even when I don't want you to be." HG flinched at this. Myka looked down again and started to rub her thumb over the back of her hand.
Helena swallowed. "I can never begin to make amends for all I've done, Myka."
Myka's head snapped up. "Stop. Just stop… apologizing please." Using both her hands she twisted the one secured between them and interlocked the fingers of their right hands together. Her thumb continued to rub the back of the other woman's. "I should be the one apologizing. What I did earlier-" She took a deep breath. "I guess it's always been a struggle for me to trust you fully."
"I can't understand why that is. It's not as if I attempted to end the world or anything" She smiled.
Myka gave a small laugh. "But you've redeemed yourself time and time again." Helena shrugged.
A silence came over them again which Myka was the one to break. Once again her voice was quiet. "I can't-" She cleared her throat. "You know I can't bewith you right now. But I- I hope we can be friends."
Helena smiled. "I'd like that darling." She was about to get off the bed and depart when Myka spoke again, her eyes still cast downward.
"And in the future." She shrugged. "You, know, if we both happen to be single, maybe we could… maybe we could try again."
Helena smiled wider. "I think I'd like that better." Myka chuckled. Their eyes locked for a moment before their eyes both instinctively travelled to one another's lips. Helena's will power broke the trance. "I better um, depart." She climbed off the bed. Myka followed her to the door. Their hands remained clasped together.
Helena pulled open the room door then turned back around and placed a hand to her cheek. "Good night, darling."
Myka's cheek flushed. "Good night, Helena." Helena dropped her hand and stood in the hallway a moment smiling brightly before giving a smile wave and heading off down the hall.
Myka watched as she walked away, her eyes travelling to the other woman's backside. She was still smiling when she shut the door but a wave of guilt converted that into a frown. Charlotte. She pushed her hands into her curls and leaned back against the door, her brain and heart swimming.
A/N: Sorry if this is a bit unedited. Hope you enjoyed! Thanks for reading and reviewing. I believe there will only be two chapters after this. I can't quite commit myself to a chaptered story right now. But there are some great one-shot ideas floating around my mind.