DON'T PANIC

Chapter nine; just who exactly is he?

-RxN-

The autumn air was cool as Axel and I walked down the street. We didn't have any destination in mind, we just walked aimlessly to make time to speak. As always, I was nervous.

"Listen..." Axel began, breaking the silence. "I know where Roxas is."

I looked to him in shock. "Is he okay?"

"Yeah, I guess you could say that." He shrugged.

"Well what is that supposed to mean? Did something happen to him?"

"Heh. Roxas' pride is too high for his own good, I'm gunna assume that night you guys got attacked he said he wasn't going to the hospital?"

"Yeah... He insisted on walking me home."

"Well, after he did that, he passed out on the street. Thankfully someone found him and called an ambulance." Axel explained, and I didn't know what to think. The only concern I had was his safety.

"So he is alright?" I asked depserately hoping for a straight answer.

"Yes. But, I don't know if you realized that night, the asshole that beat up poor Roxy was wearing brass knuckles when he attacked. Roxas' cheeck bone is slightly fractured and one of his ribs is slightly broken. He's actually lucky he didn't get killed, Xaldin must have gone easy on him..."

"Oh my goodness!" I exclaimed. "I have to visit him. Please take me, Axel."

"Well he's not in the hospital anymore, he's just resting at home. I'm sorry kiddo, but I don't think Roxas would be too happy. As I said earlier, his pride is very tall. I doubt he wants you to see him like that."

"P-Please? Can you at least ask him to see me?"

Axel groaned and rolled his emerald orbs. "Ahhh, alright, fine. I'll call him." He whipped out his cellphone and dialed a number quickly with a slightly irritated expression on. He held the phone to his ear and waited for an answer. After a moment, he said "Hello? Yo, Roxas? What's up man... Oh I'm actually with Namine right now, I ran into her after school... Yeah, I told her what happened cause you didn't have the balls to." I heard slight yelling through the phone and Axel chuckled. "Of course I told her man, the poor girl was sitting around all worried that you'd gotten killed by those assholes."

My face flushed. "Well she wants to come see you really bad." The redhead continued. "Don't be so egotistical, Namine isn't going to think you're a coward." Of course not. I thought in my head. Roxas is extremely brave, more brave then I could ever dream of being... "Alright dude, see you in a bit." He hung up the phone and I looked up at him with hopeful eyes.

"Well?"

"He said yes."

I smiled brightly. "Thank you, Axel."

"Ehh, no problem." He brushed it off and we continued down the street. "You know Namine, I really don't want you to think Roxas is weak either... To be completely honest, he's one of the toughest guys who were ever in the- um, this part of town."

"I don't think he's weak at all." I answered truthfully. "I think he is extremely brave."

"Yeah he really is. He can take out pretty much anyone, but at the same time he's still human. It would be difficult for anyone to fight back while being pumbled with brass knuckles by a 45 year old man."

Just saying that sent chills up my spine. Poor Roxas...

"No one knows about this place but me, so you're lucky that Roxas let me bring you here. I guess he really trusts you, eh?" Axel said as we approached a five story apartment building. We had walked a good half an hour across town to get there. I blushed and said nothing, and Axel laughed. "Weird, considering you guys barely know each other, but I trust Roxas' judgement well enough."

When we reached the apartment, Axel typed a code into the buzzer and the door clicked open. He opened the and I followed him inside, anxious to see Roxas. We took the elevator up to the top floor, and at the very end of the hallway is where Roxas let us in. My heart fluttered upon seeing him. He didn't look as bad as I thought, but he was still bruised up and definitely didn't look happy. When he saw me, though, he gave a slight warming smile.

"Hey, guys..." He said, letting us in.

"Yo." Axel said.

"H-Hi." I stammered, taking in my surroundings. The apartment was a small, standard apartment. There was an open living room which connected to the kitchen with a small hallway that I assumed lead to his bedroom and to the bathroom. The living room had one large couch, two plush chairs, a coffee table and a flat screen TV with an xbox hooked up. The place smelled of cigarettes, which kinda upset me.

"Have a seat anywhere you'd like, Namine." Roxas said sweetly as he sat down on the couch. Axel took one of the chairs, and I sat beside Roxas. "Sorry the place is kinda a mess..." He chuckled.

"I-It's fine." I stuttered nervously. I noticed there was an ashtray with an excessive amount of butts in it and a pack of Belmonts. Why is Roxas smoking? I wondered. It's so bad for you...

"So how ya feelin'?" Axel asked, putting his feet up on the table.

"I'm alright..." Roxas replied reluctantly. "Hey Ax would you actually mind if I talked to Namine alone for a few minutes on the balcony?" He briefly looked at me before looking back at Axel. "I owe her an explanation."

"Yeah yeah no problem, go." Axel practically shooed us to the balcony. I grew more and more nervous as we went out and Roxas shut the door behind him. He pulled out a cigarette and lit it, much to my disapproval.

"Sorry about the smoking." He said to me, looking out in the distance with his elbows leaning on the fence. "Just been so stressed out..."

"I-It's okay." I replied instantly. "I kind of understand."

He laughed with good nature. "Yeah, it's a really bad habit. Plus it hurts like hell when I cough because of my, y'know, busted rib..." He took a puff and sighed. "I'm sorry, Namine."

I was surprised by this. "W-What?"

"I'm just... Sorry. We hardly know each other and I feel like I've already put you through a lot."

"I'm just glad you're okay." I said quietly. "I was really worried..."

"I dunno." He shrugged. "I just didn't want to show up to school and be asked all these questions, and I didn't want you to have to see me all marked up again. I'm still so sorry you had to be there to witness that."

"Again, I'm just glad you're okay."

Roxas turned to me then, and took one more drag of his cigarette before flicking it off the balcony. "I need to ask you something." He spoke somewhat sternly, staring deeply into my eyes. I was lost for a moment, my cheeks blushing intensely.

"Y-Yes?" I replied after a moment, my heartbeat increasing.

"Why do you care about me, Namine?" I was startled at this question... My blush grew even deeper, and I didn't know what to say. I awkwardly looked at my feet. "It's just, we barely know each other... Yet you seem to genuinely care what happens to me. Why is that? I just have to ask." When I didn't reply for another few moments, he chuckled slightly. "I'm sorry for making you nervous."

"I-It's okay." I finally peeped. "To answer your question, well to be completely honest... I don't know how much you really know about me, Roxas. You... You saved me that one night in more than one way; I haven't forgotten about you since. You're the first boy to talk to me and actually be nice to me... I have no friends, I've been considered a loser for years, but you just... Don't seem to notice, or care. I dunno, I guess I just... I dunno."

"I don't think you're a loser." He smiled brightly, and in that moment I swore my heart skipped a beat.

"You don't?" There were butterflies in my stomach that were on a complete rampage.

"Not at all! I think you're the nicest girl I've ever met. You're honest and genuine, who cares what a bunch of losers at school think? You obviously just haven't met anyone worth your time yet, if you don't have any friends."

I stared at him wide eyed for a moment, hardly believing what he was saying, before smiling warmly. "Thank you, Roxas." I can't believe how sweet he is... I thought. He can't be real, there's no way.

"Anytime. I know how tough school can be... There's always a lot of really mean kids, I think everyone's been bulliied at one point or another."

"Not Kairi." I groaned, and Roxas laughed.

"No, Kairi has."

I gave him a weirded out look that read disbelief. "No she hasn't, she's always been popular for as long as I can remember."

"Yes but the term 'popular' by todays standards doesn't mean what you think it would mean. Kairi may think that everybody loves her, but all of her friends say mean things about her when she's not around, she just doesn't know about it." He chuckled. "In my opinion, these days popular means that everybody knows your name, not that everybody likes you. But because of Kairi's intimidating personality, no one ever says anything to her face... But believe me, they do talk shit about her."

I didn't really know what to think, I'd never thought about it like that before, but it really did make sense. Kairi was awful towards a lot of people, I always wondered how they could genuinely like being treated like that... I laughed to myself at that point, feeling silly that I'd never really understood. I'd always looked at Kairi as the most loved girl in school, but after listening to what Roxas had said, I realized that she probably was one of the most hated. As mean as it may sound, this thought brought me comfort.

"I never thought about it like that." I said smiling.

"Of course you didn't, because she's probably been planting it in your head for years that you're worthless and she's on top."

I averted his ocean blue gaze. "Is it that obvious?"

"I guess I'm just good at reading people."

There were a few moments of silence before we decided to go back inside and join Axel, who was smoking one of Roxas' cigarettes with his feet up on the coffee table.

"Axel, c'mon man." Roxas complained, kicking his friends feet off his table.

"What?" Axel cocked an eyebrow.

"Coulda asked about the cigarette, you know."

Axel shrugged nonchalantly. "Hey man, not like you should be smoking anyways. You have a fuckin' busted rib."

Roxas blushed and sat down. "It's not that bad... It only hurts when I cough, really."

"And cigarettes make you cough."

"Ehhh, leave me alone." The blonde groaned. I giggled a bit at their argument as I reasumed my position beside Roxas on the couch.

"So, what's the plan dude?" Axel asked putting his feet back up on the coffee table. Roxas gave him an irritated look but chose to say nothing about it.

"I dunno man, I'm not going anywhere." He sighed.

"I mean what are you gunna do about, you know... The situation."

"What am I supposed to do about it? Take them all on by myself?" Roxas' voice was laced with true concern. I felt so terrible for him that he was put in this position. At the same time I still didn't quite understand everything that was happening. "No one fears me anymore, especially after they saw Xaldin almost kill me. I'm not as strong as I used to be... I just don't have it in me anymore."

"You've got me on your side too, bro. I hate them just as much as you do, believe me."

I felt kind of awkward being in the same room as this conversation, it seemed like they were speaking of things I shouldn't have been hearing... But then again, they were talking as if I wasn't even there. My same old insecurities kicked in telling me you're so much of a nobody that they probably don't even care if you hear any secrets at all because that'show unimportant you are. But a new voice I'd never heard before seemed to also be speaking to me telling me that maybe the reason why Roxas spoke so openly around me was because he really did trust me that much.

"Well then they'll kill both of us, Axel." Roxas spoke with exasperation.

"This isn't the Roxas I know." Axel stood up, appearing to be angry judging by the expression that creased his brow. "The Roxas I know would never just give up like that. The Roxas I know would be off beating the shit out of each and every one of those guys, don't try to tell me you haven't before cause I've been one of them too. You and I both know that you could have mucked Xaldin that night had he been fighting like a real man with his real fists."

Roxas was silent for a few moments before responding. He seemed to be feeling remorseful, and the more the two said to each other the more out of place I started to feel. I really didn't belong in the middle of that conversation.

"I told you man... I'm not who I used to be. I don't want to live that life anymore."

"Me neither, that's why we both got out." My eyes widened in shock a bit. Roxas... I thought. Were you a member of Organization Thirteen too? I noticed him look at me quickly in his peripherals and jolt up to his feet.

"I'm sorry Namine, you're going to have to excuse us." He spoke sternly. I nodded frantically and Roxas and Axel exited to the balcony. I was scared to look over at them, but when I did it was evident that they were arguing. I could no longer hear them, which was good I guess, but at that point I could not deny my curiosity...

Just who exactly is he?

A/N: Yeah, I know... It's kinda been two years... BUT I'm bringing this story back. :3 I doubt I still have readers from when I originally posted this, but I hope I do. I'm sorry for dipping out on you guys, and I hope that you can still enjoy the story now even though its been so long.

ALSO the artwork for this story WAS drawn by me; check out my deviantart page for more stuff like that! reckless-abandoned :)

Thanks for reading! Please review if possible :3