Chapter Eighteen

The Myth of Happy Endings

I was thankful that most of Michelle's group had left, leaving only a few stragglers when the guards opened the door. I let out a guttural yell as I led the charge, catching them unaware enough that they missed me by a mile when they fired in my direction. I decked one of the frogmen, hitting it in its right eye, causing it to scream as I wrenched the gun out of its hand, hearing the other landing on the floor as well. I gave the group a wide grin, feeling alive as I took off at a run, running to where the stairs we'd been marched up earlier and heading to where I hoped the back door was.

It was a few minutes of nervous silence as shots were fired at us. I aimed my shots at their extremities, knowing not to fire any lethal shots. The two remaining guards backed off, possibly because they were wounded. I kept an eye on them as I waved everyone through, doing what I could to keep everyone protected before bringing up the rear and then jogging to the lead position, looking for the back door.

We only had to walk five more minutes before finding the door which I'd only assumed existed. I waved everyone through, watching the rear of the group of unarmed and defenseless people before leaving the building behind, leading the group to the base of the hill which I'd mentioned we'd meet up with Michelle. I kept jogging, burning up the adrenaline which was coursing through my system, grinning widely the whole time. I never felt as alive as I did in that moment.

Once we walked around the hill, the familiar blue box greeted me and I could feel my grin widening, seeing a familiar being leaning against the blue box. I slid the gun into my messenger bag for future use as I approached. He didn't seem too angry; in fact, he seemed calm, giving me a smile as he saw that I was fine.

"So I heard you had choice words for me," I stated, raising my eyebrows at him.

"I was annoyed because you handed me off to someone else," he stated with a frown, "as well as giving me an attitude."

"I had to focus on coming up with a plan which didn't involve jumping from a window. Mostly when I realized just how far from the ground two stories were," I stated with a smile which felt feeble.

"Have a problem with heights too?" he asked, turning serious.

"Only when I'm falling. Or climbing up," I stated with that same feeble-feeling smile.

"We're going to be rescued by that?" one of the people in my group asked.

"It's a lot bigger than it looks," I said with a smirk as the Doctor pushed open the doors, contradicting the sign on one of the doors.

I watched as the group looked at the TARDIS, some walking around it, trying to figure it out. Some things never change. I saw a team of the frogmen reaching the top of the hill, firing at us. I muttered a curse as I watched people panic. This wasn't going to be a good situation.

"Get in!" I shouted at the group, hearing that I barked at the people as I debated what I should do, instead waving people in before running in myself.

"You're alive!" Clara exclaimed, happy to see me.

"You expected me to up and die and not be around to drive the Doctor up the wall?" I asked, laughing as I heard the doors slam.

I looked around, seeing that the Console Room was crowded with all sorts of people before turning to Clara who said, "we should get out of the way."

I nodded, heading to the stairs so I could be out of the way and to prevent myself from hyperventilating. The last thing I wanted was to give the Doctor reason to believe that I wasn't up to traveling, that I wasn't good enough. I wondered if I was the first to feel that way as I sat down on a stair, watching as the Doctor reached the console and tried to navigate around, seeing so many people there.

"Everyone! Get out of my way!" I could hear him shout, sounding just a bit irate and more than a little agitated.

"Manners, Doc!" I shouted at him, getting a glare from him.

"I can't not be rude when I can't even run around the console! How am I gonna pilot the TARDIS when there's all sorts of people blocking my way?!" the Doctor shouted at me, now quite irate.

"Clara, can you whistle?" I asked, turning to Clara with a grin.

"How loud?" she asked, grinning back.

"As loud as you can."

My ears were ringing for a full minute afterwards as her whistle made everyone stop in their tracks as I jumped up to stand before shouting, "Okay, everyone! Listen up! I need everyone to go into this hallway here and just stand and wait! Oh and it might also be a good idea to sit down actually. If any of you suffer from motion sickness, just go wait in a bathroom! Okay, follow me!"

I turned to Clara as I waited for everyone to shuffle towards us, "did you have to whistle that loud?"

"You asked for it!" Clara exclaimed.

I opened my mouth to defend myself before realizing that I did actually ask for it before saying, "yeah. I did, didn't I?"

"Onwards!" I shouted, spinning so that I was facing the direction leading the people, realizing as I was walking that I probably did multiple rotations, but I didn't care.

I felt safe. There was nothing that could hurt me while I was in the TARDIS as long as I stayed to the rooms which were familiar to me. Especially when the Doctor was inside with us. He'd keep us safe especially if his own existence was on the line. And I'd begun to wonder if it really matter if he was nearby or far away, as long as there were people who needed help, he would help them. I walked for a few minutes before I sat down, stretching my legs, seeing that Clara was sitting down at the end of the corridor, near the door. I saw her give him a thumbs up before I started feeling the TARDIS move, the sounds of it leaving its previous location echoing down the corridor as everything jolted around wildly, reminding me of a carnival ride.

I looked over the various people who looked either worried, scared, or terrified out of their wits. Me, I was grinning like a loon. I could hear the TARDIS settle down as we felt one last jolt. I saw Clara turn in my direction and gave me a thumbs up before getting up. I jumped up and started to help everyone stand up. Luckily, no one had gotten sick, to my relief. Clara started leading everyone out of the corridor and I was at the rear of the shuffling group, making me hop from foot to foot to try to reign in my energy and impatience.

As I got to the console room, I noticed that everyone were leaving through the double doors. I walked out with the end of the group before spotting where the Doctor and Clara were, jogging towards them before I was approached by Michelle.

"This is incredible!" Michelle exclaimed, causing me to smile.

"The TARDIS is that, all right," I said with a smile, "doesn't hurt that it's a time traveling spaceship. Or is it a spacefaring time machine? Anyways, it's definitely quite a wonder."

"So what exactly does the Doctor do?"

"This," I said, motioning to the crowd which was dissipating, "helping people, saving the universe, seeing new worlds, having adventures. The kinds of things I always imagined doing when I was a kid."

"So that's why you're bouncing on your feet and running around with a huge grin on your face?" Michelle asked.

"What?" I asked, not realizing that I hadn't been able to stand still the whole time.

"You're bouncing on the heels of your feet," she stated.

"I am? Oh. Never done that before," I stated before adding, "or if I did do that before, I never noticed. Wonder what other things I do that I haven't noticed. That's new."

"You're acting more alien than the Doctor is," Michelle stated.

"And? Being 'normal' is for boring people," I stated with a grin, "what's wrong with reveling in the whole adventuring thing and being excited for life?"

"Nothing wrong with that," Michelle stated, "but do you really want others to wonder who's the alien here?"

"And I should care about the opinion of the people who aren't important to me?" I asked in a deadpan, glancing at her.

"Are you saying that I'm not important?" she asked.

"You're neither a friend nor one with a time traveling spaceship or a spa—" I started before I was interrupted.

My face stung as I suddenly found that my head had been turned by the force of the impact. I'd been slapped. For the first time in years, if not decades. I blinked, still a bit stunned as I looked at Michelle who glared me down in fury. My left hand rubbed the cheek which had been aching. She took a step toward me and grabbed me by the collar of my worn denim jacket and pulled me down so I was eye-level with her and staring into her furious gaze, flinching half because of the flame of anger and because I always felt intimidated when I made eye contact with anyone.

"You will never insinuate that I am unimportant," she almost growled.

"I said 'to me'!" I yelped in fear, unable to extricate myself from her grip.

"It doesn't matter! I'm not unimportant!" she exclaimed.

"You're definitely not my friend," I said calmly, looking into her eyes, "which means that I don't care what your opinion of me is!"

"You will!" she exclaimed.

"Oh look at you. You're like a Chihuahua. Lots of bark, especially when dealing with bigger people. Gotta act all big, huh?" I asked, my mouth going without my brain filtering it, half because I had no other plan and half because she was being a bully and I knew how to deal with bullies, "and I suppose it's all cause your parents gave you everything you ever wanted. Except their love, huh?"

I felt my left cheek erupting in pain as my head was turned again. This time, I'd been expecting it. I quickly turned to look at her.

"Don't do that again," I stated.

"Then stop seeing me as unimportant," she stated.

"I'm not gonna worship the very ground you stand on, if that's what you're saying," I stated, "what happened to you? I mean we were getting along swimmingly back there…"

"One, I was terrified out of my wits. Two, you were acting like you had a plan," she stated, "and three, you didn't say I was unimportant then."

"I said that you weren't a friend yet," I stated, "which means that I don't care for your opinion and I wasn't and not ever going to let it affect me in any way."

"You better care for my opinion!" she exclaimed, hissing at me.

"Now what is going on?" I heard a familiar voice asked, his tone curious but had a barely disguised tone of annoyance.

"She called me unimportant!" Michelle exclaimed before I could respond.

"I think that regardless of what she said, it doesn't merit physical violence," he said lightly, glancing pointedly at the hands holding onto my jacket.

"I'm not the bad guy here!" she exclaimed defensively.

"Words are no justification for physical violence," I stated lightly, "ergo, yes. Yes, you are being the bad guy here."

It was then that Michelle started crying, letting go of my jacket and I stretched backwards with a sigh of relief that I could stand straight again, getting a glance from Clara as Michelle went running to her. I looked at the Doctor, who was giving me a glare.

"I didn't exactly tell her she was unimportant in the grand scheme of things. What do you take me for? A complete monster? Wait," I said, pausing before saying, "scratch that. I…I'm just gonna…y'know…go back into the TARDIS so I don't make a bigger mess of things. I mean, there's no reason for you to see me as anything else but a complete monster."

I turned around, feeling less welcome as I made my way to the TARDIS. I needed something to soothe the emotional pain I was feeling. I needed to drink something while I worked my way through my pain, far from everyone. I pulled the door open like the sign told me to and padded in, not wanting to be in sight of anyone after what happened. Was this why everyone dropped me like a hot potato once they see my true face? Why so many guys, after I've formed a bond with them, would replace me as soon as they could?

I made my way to the kitchen, wanting to make myself some peppermint tea. That always helped me to work through my emotions. After a bit of waiting, the pot of water was boiling and I carried the teapot to the table, setting it down on a special type of coaster made for teapots before grabbing myself a teacup, a spoon, and some sugar before sitting down.

I dropped two heaping teaspoons of sugar into my cup before pouring some of the tea into my cup. And then came the waiting for the tea to cool. I stared into my hot drink, deciding that I could start working out my thoughts and feelings. Hate bubbled up, every bit of it focused at myself. I felt quite the idiot. I knew why I felt that; after all, I was pretty much a complete monster. No matter where I went, I always brought sadness and bad luck to those who got close to me. First, it had been my parents to suffer. Then my closest friends. I'd caused so much horrible things long before That Day. I deserved being slapped by Michelle and being glared at by everyone. Just like how I deserved every horrible thing that had ever happened to me.

I don't know how long I'd been sitting there in the kitchen, staring into my cup of tea when I noticed that someone sat across the table from me. I knew it was the Doctor long before he even spoke, seeing him in my peripheral vision. Silence stretched between us long enough that I got the feeling that he was letting me speak first.

"I don't know how you even put up with me," I stated, "I'm useless and a nobody when I'm not a complete monster who barges into other peoples' lives unannounced and winds up making everything worse."

"Of all things you are, you're neither useless or a nobody," he stated, sounding annoyed, "and I'm tired of people who think that they're unimportant. Everyone's important. And I can tell now that you're not a monster, complete or otherwise."

"I think I'm useless," I stated with a frown, "I mean, I passed out because I hyperventilated, which I did because I was cornered by a mob of very desperate people who all wanted my attention and for me to save them."

"Why would you want to do something like hyperventilate?"

"It…happened. I've got no control over when my tolerance of being in a crowd gets used up," I stated, "that's why I understand the need for personal space."

"So says the girl who coordinated a group hug with Clara," he said, sounding amused.

"You were going into emo territory. You needed a hug to pull you out," I stated.

He suddenly stood up and walked to me. I quickly was pulled to my feet and felt arms wrap around me in a tight hug. I knew I twitched and stiffened. After I hit the age of twelve, I stopped being hugged at all. Before that point, I was only hugged when I was upset and crying. This was still rather new to me. It was then that I realized that the hug was more like a cling and not of the romantic variety.

"Doctor?" I asked, quite puzzled by what exactly was going on.

"There, I think that helped," he stated, letting me go abruptly.

"And to think Michelle said that I act more alien than you," I muttered.

"So what was that whole mess with her all about?" he asked as he sat back on the chair he'd been sitting on before the hug.

"She wanted me to allow her opinions of me change who I am, that I would conform to her expectations," I stated with a frown as I sat down, "and I told her that she isn't quite that important to me for that to happen."

"That's different from what she told me," he stated as I stared into my cup of tea.

"It doesn't matter who you listen to," I said quietly, "I know that you'll favor her over me anyways."

"What makes you say that?"

I looked him in the eyes. I didn't care if he saw the emotional wounds everyone had left in me, the same ones I'd been careful to hide.

"Because I'm no one's favorite anything," I stated quietly, "I'm the one who's always kicked to the curb when people are done with me. I'm the replaceable girl. Everyone replaces me in their lives. Typically with people who are more perfect and less weird and unusual and with all due haste. If my mom hadn't had her tubes tied, she would have replaced me with a new, more perfect kid."

Silence fell between us as I noticed a darkness just out of reach, growing in his eyes as I divulged everything to him. As I told him now everyone got rid of me and kicked me to the curb. I saw the darkness grow once I made the passing remark about my mother.

"You're wrong," he said quietly.

"Then why did my own mother call me a 'mistake' for five years of my life?" I asked, hearing my own anger in my voice.

"I don't know," he said, just as quietly, "but you are not replaceable. Not to me, I can tell you that right now."

"But it's clear that I'm basically a mayfly compared to you," I stated with a frown.

"It's not replacing when I remember everyone I've ever traveled with," he said quietly, "and when you leave, I'll remember you too."

"Yeah," I said quietly, looking back into my cup, "I can't promise that I'll be traveling with you forever. It'd be a promise I could never keep. What I will promise is that I'll be here up until I feel that it's my time to move on. That it's time for me to put all this in my past. Until that day comes, I'm not gonna leave."

"But that day will come," he stated.

"Nothing lasts forever," I stated, "you of all people should know that. That there's a time for everything. My time for traveling in space and time with a kind old soul with his incredible time traveling spaceship is now. Or would the TARDIS be more of a space-faring time machine?"

"It doesn't matter," he said with a smile as I took a sip from my tea, "there is something that I wondered."

"Hmm?" I asked, swallowing a big gulp of my tea.

"You were adamant about having your boyfriend be the last victim we'd rescue," he stated, "why? If it was someone I cared about, I'd rush to rescue them the first chance I'd get."

"I'm not in a rush to get my hopes crushed," I stated, looking at the liquid in my cup, "the longer I draw it out, the longer I could remain hopeful and ignorant of his possible death. Besides, I don't think you'd be in a rush to see the scene which would doubtlessly unfold if he is alive. Let alone just how busy I'd be afterwards. I want to remain focused on helping everyone before I get all soft and mushy."

"You didn't deny it," he stated with a grin.

"Stop it! You're too old to try to play the part of an annoying little brother," I stated with a huff, "especially when you were definitely acting like a withered ol' grandpa."

"I don't act like a withered old grandpa!" he exclaimed in annoyance.

"Then why do you sometimes look at me with that look of experience and wisdom that I used to see in my own grandpa's eyes?" I asked with a smirk, "face it, you can't help it."

"I can't help it that I have old eyes," he stated, "not physically old, just—"

"That's what I'm saying," I stated, "you sometimes come off as a space grandpa. A space grandpa who brings home the broken strays and tries to mend them while playing the part of an interstellar tourist. Wow. I think I just summed you up."

"I don't know if I like or hate your analogy," he muttered.

"You'll get used to it, old man."

"Are you trying to rise out of me?"

"If by 'rise', you mean just me giving you a hard time just for the sake of it and nothing much else, yes. Wow, and to think I almost could have made an innuendo out of it," I muttered with a smirk.

"I'm done," he said, standing up and walking out of the kitchen, "I'm done."

~Author's Note~

Michelle got a bit of character development, as did Lisa (sorry for the angst). I couldn't help how Lisa summed up the Doctor (which I think is the perfect analogy). Just like I couldn't help but to show that she does have a bit of an enjoyment of innuendoes. I don't want to see Lisa and Jack talk to each other. To Lisa, flirting is just talking and Jack…well…I don't think I need to say anything. Those two, if they ever meet, would probably throw innuendoes and flirts at each other and it just stays at that. And if poor Eric is there, he'd probably get tired of it or sees that Lisa means nothing by it. I hope you guys are enjoying this and if you guys want to point things out to me, I would fix them when I could. I can guarantee you that Michelle won't be this much of a jerk for long.