BLURP! BLURP! Ok, this is a suggestion from Crownless King and Cloudysmile ! Hope you guys will enjoy thisXD Thank you for all the suggestions=D
This chapter was a tad hard to write, but I soon got an awesome idea...*grins* Thank you to Mockingjay Rose for Beta-Reading!
WARNING: VARIA INCLUDED. WHICH MEANS SOME LOVELY SWEARING.
...a Host in a Host Club...
Xanxus sat slouched on his grand throne while waiting for the others to finish getting ready. He wore a black tuxedo and a half-done tie, with his X-guns and a bottle of Vodka stashed somewhere in his pockets. Squalo walked in first sporting the same outfit as his boss- a black tuxedo, however with a done up tie. His long silvery hair flowed gracefully down his back as he strode across the room to grab a small bottle of brandy. Brandy was always helpful during events or special occasions when you had to drug the other person to get them to 'Shut the hell up'.
Bel and Fran walked in with Mammon floating close behind. Bel's signature laugh and Fran's boring monotone was heard the moment the duo walked in. Bel was adjusting his tiara when Levi and Lussuria strolled in the room.
"Ah...everyone looks so lovely, Mou~" squealed Lussuria, who clapped his hands with joy.
"When are we leaving, boss?" asked Levi, who walked over to the small fridge across the room to seize a few bottles of Tequila, just in case his boss ran out and threw a tantrum. Xanxus glared at Levi before he stood up and without warning, he walked out of the room.
-XXXX-
"Ushishishi~ We've arrived?" questioned the prince amused by his surroundings, "Why is everyone staring at us? Why are some even fainting?"
"Who knows, maybe your face is so ugly that-" But before he could finish, Fran discovered knives sticking out from his frog hat.
"Did you say something, shishishi?~" twitched Bel, who held another handful of knives at the ready. Bel grinned and pocketed his knives when he saw Fran shaking his head frantically. "Good froggy"
"Voi, boss..." murmured Squalo, glancing at Xanxus nervously, "What are we here for?" Xanxus shrugged apathetically, but he sensed the uneasiness in his second-in-command's voice. He himself was getting anxious as well. Why the hell is everyone staring at us? But there was one point in particular that worried him.
Why was a majority of the people here WOMEN?
Not that it was a problem...but why? Why are there so few men? Xanxus snapped back to reality when he saw the Ninth walking towards them cheerfully. Tch...bastard...what does the old man have in store...
"Xanxus! Varia! How nice of you to come today!" greeted Timoteo, beaming at the group. Squalo wasted no time and got straight to the point.
"VOI! WHAT ARE WE HERE FOR, DAMMIT?" With his loud ear-piercing voice and his sword pointed at the Ninth, Squalo gained quite some attention. Timoteo laughed and exchanged a few mischievous looks with his men.
"Well...what your job is today Xanxus... as well as the Varia, since we're including them in this job… I believe your men will be quite good at this," Timoteo paused and grinned, "Your jobs today are to be...hosts!"
Xanxus stared at his father in disbelief, his eyes widening when he knew what they were all in for. Bel laughed, Fran just kept staring, Mammon didn't care since he was too 'young' for this and Levi didn't know whether to feel happy or shocked for his boss. Lussuria squealed in delight and Squalo gagged and 'VOI-ed'. Good thing he brought that brandy along.
"VOOOII! I THOUGHT YOU SAID IT WAS JUST SOME F**KING PARTY!"
"Well well...even an old man like me make mistakes, Squalo" The Ninth was clearly satisfied at their priceless reactions. "All you have to do now is to please all the wonderful ladies here"
"The fuck I will..." muttered Squalo angrily, brushing his hair away from his face, feeling immensely annoyed at the fact that he had to be surrounded by squealing, possessive and obsessive fangirls. Bel, on the other hand, didn't mind at all.
"Ushishishi~ This will be interesting for the prince..."
"F**KING HELL..." growled Xanxus furiously, who couldn't believe that they were invited to some trashy host party. He glowered dangerously at the Ninth before entering a large, grand room fitted with extremely expensive furniture. No way in hell...
-Squalo-
Squalo carefully inspected the small bottle of brandy he was holding before sitting down on a grand-looking armchair. "Should last..." he muttered as a girl in her late teens walked up nervously and sat down opposite him. Squalo rested his head on the side of his hand and eyed the girl disinterestedly. She's so damn nervous she can't talk...well, that's a good thing at least. The girl looked up at Squalo and then back to her lap. W-what c-can I say to S-Squalo-Sama...I-I...
She hesitated before stuttering, "S-Squalo- S-sama, m-my n-name is-"
"Voi, cut out the 'Sama' woman, it makes me puke like a drunken shit," snapped Squalo, changing to a better position on his armchair. The girl blushed and nodded meekly before continuing.
"S-Squalo-s-san...w-well...I-I just want t-to s-say...that I..." stammered the girl while blushing furiously, "I-I-"She paused and her face glowed with an eerie look of determination while staring at the handsome young man opposite her, who was trying to brush away a strand of hair that was covering his eyes.
"I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, SO CAN YOU MARRY ME? WILL YOU BUY ME A CAR? WILL YOU MARRY ME? WILL YOU BUY ME THE LATEST PERFUME? BUY ME A CAKE! PLEASE! I BEG YOU! I WILL BE A GOOD WIFE! I SWEAR I WILL! SO WILL YOU MA-"
"V-Voi...drink this first, woman," spoke Squalo wearily as he handed her a glass of 'apple juice'. The girl gave a loud cry of delight and accepted the drink enthusiastically with shaking hands. Neatby, Xanxus scoffed when he heard the girl propose to Squalo. The rest of the Varia looked on with great interest on what was going to happen next.
I ABSOLUTELY CANNOT BELIEVE IT! OHMYGOSH! I MUST BE THE LUCKIEST GIRL IN THE WO-
Squalo eyed her curiously as the glass fell from her shaking hands and shattered as it fell to the floor. The girl fainted and fell to the floor, who had to be taken out by the Ninth's men. Squalo sighed and rubbed his temples. I'll kill the Ninth one day...how dare he put me together with a crazy bitch, DAMMIT!
-XXXX-
"Mou!~ Squ-chan! You broke her heart!" exclaimed Lussuria, walking over to the door, "I'm going to get the next girl for Bel!" He opened the door and was about to walk out when he turned around and questioned mischievously, "By the way, Squ-chan...how much brandy did you use, mou?~"
Squalo glared at Lussuria and snarled:
"All of it"
-Bel-
A young quiet-looking girl walked in and sat down opposite Bel. Bel grinned, "Ushishishi~ You look nice today" The girl nodded and smiled slightly.
"Ah, Bel-sempai...she doesn't like you," whispered Fran, loud enough for the girl to hear. The girl stared at Bel with a horrified look and shook her head desperately.
Bel laughed and stabbed Fran's hat with a handful of knives, "Stupid froggy" Then he turned to the girl who was sobbing softly on a handkerchief. "Ushishishi~ I do like you," soothed Bel as he got up from his chair and walked over to the whimpering girl. Fran looked on unconcerned and knew what his sempai was going to do, after all being a ladies' man was not easy.
Bel smiled sheepishly at the blushing girl and leant closer to whisper softly in her ear, "You're the only one for the prince, princess..." The girl widened her eyes in shock and took one last look at the prince before she fainted.
Fran shook his head and beckoned for the Ninth's men to take her away. Then he looked at Bel and sighed.
Liar.
-XXXX-
"Again...how many girls are fainting, mou?~"groaned Lussuria as he signalled to Levi to get the next girl in the room. Levi strolled to the door nervously and gulped as he opened the door.
It's the boss's turn...
-Xanxus-
Xanxus yawned as the girl sat down opposite him with a big smile on her face. She looked excited. Very excited. And that overload of excitement was awfully freaky. Xanxus glared at her before reaching over for a glass of Tequila. The girl wasted no time to gain his attention.
"My name is Pippi! And I am 18 years old! I know I'm a bit young, but I'm good at lots of things! Things such as-"
"I get it, trash..." snapped Xanxus, closing his eyes and thinking of ways to strangle the old man, "I don't give a shit at what you're good at."
"R-right...w-well..." stammered Pippi who was quite taken aback, "Where do you live?" Xanxus didn't reply and Pippi took this as an excuse to continue babbling.
"Well, you know I already know where you live! Haha! Being the fangirl I am...of course I know everything!" giggled the girl, "I know everything that there is to know about you, Xanxus-sama." Xanxus opened his eyes and stared at the girl like 'What the fuck?'
"Xanxus-sama, I know how old you are!"
"I know your birthday..."continued the girl, clearly proud of herself, "And...the exact minute, no, second you were born into this world!"
"I know what your favourite foods are!"
"I know where you go every holiday!"
"I know-"
BAM.
Xanxus couldn't take it anymore. He couldn't deal with another minute of her presence and to solve this, he opened fire at the finely painted wall. And with that, he signalled for the men to come over and take the insane girl away.
"H-hey! I'm not finished!" screeched the girl, frantically trying to get Xanxus's attention, "I also know what type of girl you like!"
Squalo smirked when he saw his boss motion to Levi to get him a bottle of Vodka. His attention then turned to the shrieking girl and he wondered what type of girl she had in mind.
"Xanxus-sama! It's me!"
The door closed with the aid of Xanxus's gun. Another hole. Mammon was already counting the expenses. Squalo forced back a laugh and his gaze fell on his boss, who crushed a full wine bottle.
Xanxus wanted so badly to kill that damn girl. No, he would kill the Ninth for making him do this.
"Xanxus-sama! You like girls like me!"
"Hell no, bitch"
NAME: Xanxus
OCCUPATION: Host
STATUS: FIRED.
Thanks so much for reading!
Reviews will help a great deal=D
So, who did you think was the best Host? *Grins*
LAATTERR!
-THEULTIMATEGREENBOSS