Why hello there :D [Smiley face inserted for flechette mango]
A suggestion from yerashi9921 ! Thank you readers for all your suggestions and reviews! Very grateful to all of you^^ Please don't forget to review this chapter as well!=D
yerashi9921 –Hope you enjoy this chapter! Let's hope that Xanxus's 'love' for animals can rival yours eh?
Well then, let's start shall we?
...a Zoo-keeper...
Xanxus sighed loudly as he put on his uniform for the day, which consisted of a pair of black trousers and a white shirt with the logo: "You love Animals, We love Animals, We all love Animals!". Tch...why do I have to do this shitty job? Why you wonder, Xanxus? That's because you have failed all the other jobs that the Ninth assigned for you. He walked reluctantly towards the Manager's office and opened the door, only to find the Manager sipping his tea gingerly, like an old man. The man beamed and gestured for Xanxus to be seated.
"Your name is Xanxus yes?"
"Yes," replied Xanxus gruffly who was picking at the open seam in his uniform.
"Nice to meet you, Xanxus. My name is Mr Xuan," spoke the Manager as he handed Xanxus a piece of paper, "Now, this is a list of all the things you have to have completed by today. Please look through them carefully and complete them to the best of your ability" He ended with a smile.
Xanxus groaned which earned him an another cheeky smile from Mr Xuan. Mr Xuan in return, earned a cold glare just before Xanxus left the room and slammed the door behind him. His day was just beginning.
-XXXX-
Xanxus stopped and stared at the animal he had to take care of first. A large animal with a trunk. You guessed it. An elephant. Great...damn this. He took a quick glance at his first instruction for the day:
1. Clean the elephant's feet.
"Don't you need to be freaking qualified to do this shit?" growled Xanxus, coming back from the store-room with the necessary equipment for the task. He opened the gate and let himself inside, and then strolled over to the elephant. The elephant stared suspiciously at the figure before it turned around and lifted a leg for Xanxus to scrub. Xanxus narrowed his eyes. Just who the hell does it think it is huh? I am not your bloody slave, trash.
Xanxus stared at the foot and grimaced. How dirty is this foot? Small bits of food, mud and minute rocks could be seen, not to mention the elephant's own poo. Nonetheless, he had to do this. Xanxus grabbed a scrubber and placed it into some hot, soapy water, and then used the scrubber to clean the dirty foot. The elephant moved which made Xanxus nearly lose his balance. He glared furiously at the elephant and continued, this time scrubbing it even harder. The elephant cried out in distress and nearly kicked Xanxus in the face. He cursed softly and proceeded to the next foot.
-XXXX-
The air stank like shit. Literally. With the elephant out of his mind, Xanxus was onto his next instruction.
2. Feed the monkeys peanuts.
Xanxus slipped into the monkeys' feeding spot quietly, not wanting to be seen by too many visitors. He hastily threw the peanuts into the air and was about to exit when a child shrieked: "Ah! The monkeys mummy! The monkeys!" Brat. Now, Xanxus couldn't exit even if he wanted to. There were too many people crowding around to do that.
A huge group monkeys came out and fought over the peanuts. Xanxus was now a witness to the scratching, cat-fighting and monkey-bickering being held. Instead of actually eating the peanuts, the monkeys were throwing them in the air, with one landing hard on Xanxus's head. He rubbed the bump with a scowl and reached for his guns when he realised that his guns got confiscated by the Ninth. That old man takes them away when I need them most, that bastard. Yep, that's right. When you "need it most" to shoot some monkeys down. Ever thought about animal cruelty? Don't think so.
Suddenly, the monkeys all turned around stared at Xanxus hungrily. "What now, you cat-fighting trashes?" He then glanced down remembered that he was still holding the bucket that was filled to the brim with peanuts. Xanxus's eyes widened when he knew that in a matter of a few seconds he would become a monkey's best friend.
"Give me a freaking break!" he roared when he saw the monkeys charge towards him. To his surprise, his quick reflexes saved him. He threw the bucket full of peanuts with more than enough force, which scattered the 'delicious' treats everywhere and injured a few monkeys.
"Mama! I think that's a human monkey! Look! Over there!" cried a little boy pointing at Xanxus. His mother replied with a laugh and said that they didn't exist. Damn kid.
-XXXX-
From cleaning duck poo around the zoo and placing the disgusting little black balls of shit into a brown paper bag, trying to catch a rogue squirrel which nearly had Xanxus tripping over an acorn to handing out colourful balloons to 'screwed up' little kids with 'twisted minds', Xanxus had had enough. Xanxus let out an exasperated sigh and looked at the last command.
20. Let the lions loose
He couldn't believe what he was seeing. Let the lions loose? Loose?"Is this trashy old man out of his mind...?" he wondered while walking towards the lions' play area. The lions glared at him as he neared, which soon turned into a fierce glaring competition. Even Bester's better than you guys, so piss off. Xanxus grabbed the keys from his pockets and impatiently unlocked the gate. "So long, suckers."
He stole a last glance at his instructions sheet and stared at a large oil spot. What the shit...what is that doing there…?
20. Let the lions loose-n their muscles by encouraging them to play with the equipment provided.
Xanxus turned around and stared at all the commotion going on, then turned back and shrugged his shoulders. Oh well.
-XXXX-
"M-manager! There's trouble! Big trouble!" cried a desperate worker, "T-the lions! The lions!"
"What?" roared the Manager as he heard frantic screams and terrified shouts from the people, "W-what is the meaning of this?"
NAME: Xanxus
OCCUPATION: Zoo-keeper
STATUS: FIRED.
[Deleted Segment]
He walked reluctantly towards the Manager's office and opened the door, only to find the Manager sipping his tea gingerly, like an old man. Everything to him seemed like an old man...Why? Because he was aging. Like an old man.
Hope yah enjoyed that hmmm?
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Thank you for all your weird and wonderful suggestions once again! GAAA KAKAKA!
Must sleep now... ZzZz
-TUGB