Erik woke up the next morning wondering when he actually fell asleep the night before. He sat up, rubbed his eyes and then looked around the room with disinterest. The last few weeks living here had been busy and a lot to take in and hopefully today would be a lay-low day…a crash resounded nearby, causing Erik to cringe. Maybe not…

He got up and dressed, wearing what the girls called "black skinny jeans" in the style that supposedly was popular and a white undershirt over him. He walked into the kitchen; opening the cupboard he was allowed in when there was another crash behind him. He went to pull his knife but grasped nothing and remembered that he had left it in his room the night before.

He looked behind him and there was Erika, a pan on the floor and her head in her hands. She looked up at Erik and saw his worried look which quickly made her pull herself together and pick the pan up.

"Morning," she said quietly. Erik gave a slight nod in response as he took in how tired Erika looked. Remembering her not-so-peaceful sleep last night he knew she must be emotionally exhausted.

As he went to get his breakfast he saw Erika's sleeve lift up a bit to reveal the same black markings he has seen previously. Now in the daylight he noticed that it was a long tattoo going up her forearm of a musical staff with notes on it.

"When did you get that?" he asked.

"I got it when I was 18." Erika explained, knowing that her plan to hide it from Erik had already failed not even 24 hours after she promised herself to keep it a secret. "I was going through a lot in my life at the time and I had composed a song in my head to help me sleep at night. I would hum it to myself to get the bad memories to go away. So, because it meant so much to me I had the noted tattooed to my arm to remind me that I survived and I always will no matter what."

Erik slowly walked over to where Erika was standing and put his hand on her arm. "Can I see it?" He asked quietly. Erika nodded hesitantly and lifted her sleeve up the rest of the way to reveal the rest of the tattoo to Erik.

Erik gazed at the tattoo and noticed some scars peeking out from under the permanent ink and slowly grazed his fingers against them. Erika had hurt herself? Why? He wondered as he turned his attention back to the noted on her arm. He slowly hummed out the tune as he read the notes and Erika immediately froze.

The more Erik hummed the song the more recognizable it became to him. Soon he stopped humming as full realization came to him. This was his song; he had written it for a girl he had exchanged letters with before his obsession with Christine. The song that kept him alive in those dark times – the song he had written for the message-writer. His mind was reeling and spinning – was Erika the message-writer? That self-harmer? That person who had been with him in his dark time – and was going through hers?

Erika was squirming as his grasp became firmer and firmer at his thoughts. He released her and gazed at her with shocked eyes. "It was you," he whispered. "The girl who wrote to me every night."

Erika now knew that her secret was out and soon became angry. "So what if I am?! You became so obsessed with Christine that your letters stopped and just when I needed them! You were the only person I trusted with my secrets and the only person who kept me in reality during that time in my life! I broke the laws of time to write to you knowing that my previous self would be the only person in history to understand me! But I should've remembered the damn obsession with that bitch opera singer! I remembered the song, though. After you wrote it it came into my memory from being you and it became the only comfort I had! So you know what Erik? This is why I don't date, why I don't accept that I have feelings for you because I know that your mind is screwed up and it won't ever let any true sense come through! You're a man who is ruled by your pride and selfishness and you never once thought about the hurt girl you ditched for a woman who would never love you!" Erika was crying now but her speech had gotten Erik upset as well and he found himself yelling at her almost twice as loud.

"How dare you! You think I forgot you one purpose?! Sure I obsessed over Christine but never once did I forget the girl who would hurt herself and I constantly worried that I would find a note with your blood on it. I stopped my letters because I was afraid that I couldn't help you through whatever you were going through while telling you the shit that was my life. I was sure that my horrible stories from my past would only make you more depressed than ever and that I would read your last note telling me your final goodbye and that you would be gone!" Erik by this point had grabbed Erika by the shoulders and forced her to look into his eyes. "Now that I know who you are I can see that you are still holding onto the past and it's hurting you; I see it in your eyes. On the outside you convince everyone that you're alright – that you're perfectly alright – but in your mind you're bursting at the seams trying to get out. It's going to kill you – you can't do it alone Erika!" he shouted.

Erika stared in shock at him as he stared back into her eyes. Once over her shock she glared full force at him.

"How do you know how I feel? How can you ever possibly understand what I've felt – what has happened to me? You'll never understand! I thought you did but I think that you've clouded your mind with so much music that you've forgotten!" she shouted, struggling in his grasp.

"Oh I know – I know exactly what has happened to you. You've been alone, cast aside, abused, hated, unwanted, used and hurt. I remember those days – those days that you would tell me that you had broken down and cut again after saying you were going to get help and those days where you would write to keep yourself alive. I remember those dark days. I want you to know that you can't do it alone. It WILL kill you Erika." As the truth of his words sunk in, Erika struggled, wanting to be alone if she cried.

"Let me go you bastard!" she said, wriggling under his hands trying to get away.

"Damn it all!" Erik said, grabbing her face and kissing her. At first Erika tried to fight away the electricity, but when she found how amazing it felt, she stopped her struggling. Erik pulled away and she glared at him.

"How dare you!" Erika yelled.

"How dare I? How dare I what? Show you that you're not alone? Show you that I will help you – no matter what it is? Show you that I love you?! That I fell in love with you, even during my focus on Christine, when we started writing those letters?" Erik asked, forcing her to look at him. Erika's eyes widened slightly at the word love, but other than that her visage remained sad. He kissed her again, more gentle this time. When he pulled away, Erika met his eyes, near tears. She embraced him and buried her face in his chest, sobbing. A little shocked and unknowing of what to do, he wrapped his arm around her, rubbing her back. They stood like that for who knows how long – just supporting each other. When she had no more tears, Erika pulled away. Her eyeliner was running and her eyes were puffy and red. She wiped at her eyes and sniffed.

"I'm sorry – no one deserves to witness this hideousness," she joked, giving a small laugh and wiping at her eyes. Erik smiled softly and took her hand. He kissed her fingers gently. "If anyone knows about this, I'll have to kill you." She had returned to her cold exterior.

"Thank you for allowing me in for a few minutes," he whispered, bowing as he kissed her fingers again. He started out from the room before Erika called him back.

"I think we need to talk about those letters. But in a more collected manner."

Well guys, here's the next chapter like I promised. Very tense, huh? Anyways, the feeling of the original chapter was cut from this since I wanted to add more emotion to Erika's back story. I've recently been struggling with the same stuff Erika has been struggling with and I'm currently getting help for it. The story with Erika's cutting was just something we were adding to the story to give it more depth but after this past year I can identify with Erika and how she feels. I added some emotional stuff in this based on how I felt everyday and still do feel sometimes so sorry that this chapter might be a little bit of a joy kill but it was in the original draft of the story with more added to it. Please review and I hope you guys have been enjoying the story! Next chapter will hopefully be out tomorrow.

~MewAngelWings