Summary: When Susie begins running for school president, Calvin does also, in an attempt to stop her from becoming 'leader' of his school.

And now back to Calvin and Hobbes: The Series
Written by Swing123 and Garfieldodie

CALVIN FOR PRESIDENT
(Rewritten)

BRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!!!!

The bell sounding lunch rang out throughout the entire school.

The classroom doors opened, and all the kids poured out.

Calvin, however, instead of going to the cafeteria, he went to the bulletin board on the wall by the EXIT door.

Miss Wormwood had announced that the position for school president was open, and Calvin wanted to see who was planning on running for it.

Calvin walked up to the board, and was shocked to see that he was not the only person interested in it.

Nearly his entire class had flocked to the board, and was currently reading the ad for it.

And Calvin was in the very back.

"Excuse me," he said, walking up to the back of the crowd.

The kids ignored him.

"I'm trying to get past here." He growled.

No reaction. The kids continued talking to each other and ignoring Calvin.

"Get the heck out of my way, please." He said, through gritted teeth.

Still nothing.

"HEY!!!" He shouted, finally. "BEAT IT!!! MOVE OVER!!!! HIT THE ROAD, YOU GRAVY BRAINED FREAKS!!!!"

The kids all turned around and gave Calvin a shocked stare.

Then after a tense moment... well, they turned back around, and continued talking.

Calvin narrowed his eyes at the crowd, and his teeth gritted.

There was no way he was going to be able to push past them, all.

Unless...

Calvin reached into his pocket and pulled out a small yellow device with a red button on top.

BOOM!!!!

Instantly the kids all froze.

Calvin slipped the Time Pauser back into his pocket, and chuckled.

He walked over, and proceeded to shove everyone out of his way, mercilessly, until he reached the front.

When he got to the front, he took the pauser out, again.

BOOM!!!

The kids all jumped in surprise, and looked around.

Then they spotted Calvin at the front, staring at the board.

He turned and glared at them.

"What are you looking at?!?" he demanded.

Totally confused, the kids grouped back in front of the board, giving Calvin suspicious looks.

At that very moment, Susie walked up to Calvin.

"That really looks like fun, doesn't it, Calvin?" She asked, looking at the notice.

"What? Oh, yeah, sure whatever." Calvin said, only briefly looking at Susie.

"What would you do if you were president?" Susie asked.

Calvin paused.

He turned and stared at Susie for a long time.

"You really don't know?" He asked.

"Yeah, I do." Susie said, emotionlessly. "I guess I just got a glimmer of hope."

"I'd have the place demolished." Calvin said, turning back to the board.

"Right." Susie said, rolling her eyes. "Anyway, I think I may just run."

Calvin glared at her.

"you? Are you kidding me? Who'd vote for you?" He demanded.

"Uh, I could probably think of a few people." Susie said.

"Preposterous! Nobody would let a girl run, anyway." Calvin said, crossing his arms. "Presidential positions are a MAN'S job!"

"Uh huh." Susie said, rolling her eyes. "Well, I think I'm going to sign up to run."

"Don't humiliate yourself, Susie! You should leave that up to me!" Calvin yelled.

Susie walked past Calvin, and started towards the door by the board.

"HEY!" Calvin shouted after her. " You do know that there's no way they'd let you run! Especially with the kind of ideas who'd come up with!"

"Watch me!" Susie called back.

She walked into the office.

Calvin glared at the door.

He walked up to it, pushing past all the kids, and stood in front of it.

He crossed his arms.

"They won't let her enter. They can't. It's virtually impossible."

He then sat down in a chair by the door, and waited.

There was a long moment of silence.

Then, Susie walked out.

She turned and gave Calvin a sneaky grin.

"Guess what, Calvin?" She said, shiftily.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH!!!!" Calvin screamed, bursting through his front door, and rushing up the stairs.

"Hello, Calvin." Mom said, not even looking up from her cooking.

Hobbes was sitting on Calvin's bed reading a comic book.

When he heard the loud screams and pounding footsteps, he set the comic aside, and straightened up.

Calvin burst inside, screaming his head off.

"Hello, Calvin." Hobbes said, acting as if this was how Calvin always came home from school. "How are things going, today?"

"I'LL TELL YOU HOW THINGS ARE GOING, TODAY!!!!" Calvin screamed in his face. "TERRIBLE!!! WHAT KIND OF HEARTLESS BRUTE WOULD LET A GIRL RUN FOR PRESIDENT?!?!"

Hobbes stared at him.

"Uhhh..."

"EXACTLY!!! IT'S INHUMANE!!!"

"Calvin, just out of curiosity, when did we pick politics up in this TV show?" Hobbes asked.

Calvin stared at him.

"What are you talking about? I'm not doing anything political."

"Oh, never mind." Hobbes said. "I must have slipped into a different cartoon for a second there."

"I'm talking about the position for SCHOOL president!!!" Calvin shouted. "Susie, of all people, says she's going to register to run for it!!!"

"Huh." Hobbes said. "And what's wrong with that?"

"Open your eyes, Hobbes!" Calvin shouted. "Can you possibly imagine the horrors that would occur if Susie became leader of my school?!?"

"Uh... leader?"

"She'd keep us there all day and all night!! We'd have to sleep in sleeping bags on the classroom floor, and be waken up by a drill sargent at three in the morning to do laps around the school!! She'd have us wear horrible itchy uniforms and ban recess!!! Homework would double!! No, TRIPLE!!!"

"I see." Hobbes said, rubbing his chin. "So do you think people would actually vote for her if she was doing that?"

"That won't stop her!" Calvin shouted. "Her diabolical mind will probably hatch a way to rig the voting! She'll death threat people and bribe them with large sums of money!"

"Huh."

"We have to stop her, somehow!" Calvin said, pacing across the floor. "But how...?"

"You're blowing the situation totally out of proportion, again."

"What?"

"I said, maybe you could run for school president against her."

Calvin stared at Hobbes for a long moment.

"Hobbes, that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life." He said, finally.

"Uh huh."

"First off, how the heck would I go about running for school president? I don't know what to do."

"Well, it can't be that hard." Hobbes shrugged. "All you have to do is come up with a few ideas that'll bring some people to your side and then run from there."

"How would I do that?" Calvin asked. "I don't have any ideas! The only ones I DO have would have all the school executives against me!"

There was a pause.

"Aren't the school executives already against you?" Hobbes asked.

"Right that's the whole point!" Calvin said, throwing his arms up. "I wouldn't stand a chance running for president."

There was another pause.

"Unless, of course, you found a good way to get everyone on your side." Hobbes said, tapping his chin in thought.

"Right, Hobbes, how would I do that?" Calvin demanded. "The only way I could beat Susie in a competition like this, would be if I had a twisted genius mind helping me with it."

There was a long, throbbing moment of silence.

Calvin and Hobbes stared at each other.

"Sure, I'll help!" Socrates said, cheerfully, folding up the blue prints for his latest prank, and putting it in his desk drawer. "What would be the situation in which my scheming expertise is needed?"

"You need to help Calvin beat Susie in a contest for school president." Hobbes said.

"I see." Socrates said, standing up, and stretching. "Usually, I don't get involved in politics, but I'll make an exception for my good buddy, Calvin!"

"Right, whatever." Calvin said, crossing his arms. "We need you to find a way to make myself look good, while at the same time make Susie look bad!"

"Mm-hmmm," Socrates said, rubbing his chin. "Yes, excellent. I have the perfect plan."

"You do?!" Calvin said, hopefully.

"Yep, the competition is in the bag." Socrates chuckled. "All you have to do is sign yourself up, and I'll take care of the rest!"

Calvin grinned.

"Excellent! And you'll sure it'll work?" He asked.

"Have my plans ever failed?" Socrates asked.

There was a short pause.

"No, but they haven't really succeeded that well, either." Hobbes said.

"Oh, nonsense, my plan is flawless." Socrates assured. "Now, run along, and I'll meet Cally at the school tomorrow."

Socrates ushered them to the door.

"And rest assured, Susie will not win the contest." He said. "OK then? Bye, bye, now."

And with that, he escorted them out his bedroom door, and slammed it.

SLAM!!

Calvin and Hobbes stood there behind his door for a second, staring off into space.

"Well, that's settled, anyway." Hobbes said.

"Well, for all the trouble I'm going through his plan had better work." Calvin growled.

And with that, the duo walked down the stairs, and exited the house.

The next day, Calvin brought Hobbes with him to school.

He apparently wanted to see what Socrates had in mind for getting Calvin to win, too.

So, once they arrived at the school, Calvin got right down to business, and registered to run.

Calvin walked up the door with Hobbes, and stared at it for a second.

"Alright, then, Hobbes. I'm going in!" He said, melodramatically.

Hobbes rolled his eyes, and sat down in the chair next to the door.

"That's nice. Let me know how it goes." He yawned.

Calvin glared at him.

"Just ruin the drama why don't ya?" He muttered, opening the door, and walking inside.

As soon as the door closed, the sound of running footsteps reached Hobbes' ears.

He looked up.

Socrates ran down the hall , panting, and holding some tools in his hands.

"Hello, Socrates." Hobbes said, as he ran up. "What did you do?"

Socrates came to a stop in front of Hobbes, and wiped some sweat off his brow.

"You'll see." He said, chuckling. "I can tell you though, that Susie is not going to be winning."

At that moment, Calvin walked out of the office.

"Alright, they signed me up." He said, dusting his hands together. "They tried to give me some advice on how to run, but, as you know, I'm too smart for that."

"They signed you up?" Hobbes asked, shocked.

Calvin turned and stared at him.

"Yeah, what's so surprising about that?" Calvin demanded.

"So there was no bloodshed?" Hobbes asked.

Calvin glared at Hobbes, and turned to Socrates.

"OK, Crateso, did you set your hot shot idea up?"

"Everything is in place." Socrates checking his watch. "Susie will be coming around that corner in 32 seconds. When she gets here, tell her you signed up, and I'll set the operation in motion."

And with that, Socrates turned around, and rushed out the EXIT door.

Calvin stared after him.

"How did he..."

"He plans every prank out, mathematically." Hobbes said.

"Oh."

Suddenly, Susie appeared around the corner, wearing a red, white, and blue pin that said, "VOTE FOR SUSIE".

"Hello, Calvin." She said, walking up to him.

"Susie." Calvin said, blankly.

"What are you doing?" She asked.

"Beating you in this contest." Calvin said, raising an eyebrow. "I've just signed myself up to run for school president."

Susie stared at him.

"What?" She demanded. "Calvin, you can't win this. Who'd vote for you?"

"I can think of a few people." Calvin said, smugly. "Especially after today is done."

Susie rolled her eyes.

"Well, I know it won't do you any good whatsoever, but good luck." She said, walking past him.

"Oh no," Calvin said, turning around, and facing her. "Good luck to you. I won't be needing it."

Susie glared at him, and walked over to the exit door.

She opened the door.

Calvin, Hobbes, and Susie's eyes all popped open in shock.

There was a gigantic neon sign sticking out of the ground next to the school flag.

It was plugged into a socket on the wall of the school, and the words shown brightly throughout the playground.

SUSIE DERKINS: LOCAL STUDENT AND SPITTING CAMEL!
NOT THE RIGHT PERSON FOR THE JOB OF PRESIDENT!
VOTE FOR CALVIN!
WHO IS DEFIANTLY NOT A CAMEL!

There was a long moment of silence.

Calvin, Hobbes, and Susie all stood in the doorway, their mouths hanging open, and their eyes wide.

Kids were walking by the sign, pointing at it, and laughing their heads off.

Finally, Hobbes broke the silence.

"Huh." He said.

Slowly, Susie turned, and gave Calvin a murderous look.

Calvin, still totally in shock from Socrates' sign, stared at her with wide eyes.

Susie stalked across the floor, and came up to Calvin.

He grinned, nervously.

"Oh, hi, Susie. How's the campaign going?" He asked.

Susie went nose to nose with Calvin.

"So, this is how you want to do this?" She growled, through narrowed eyes.

"Uhhhh... I don't know quite how to answer that..." Calvin began.

"Fine then," Susie said, straightening up. "It's game on."

And with that, she turned, and walked away, leaving Calvin shocked.

"Hmmm," Hobbes said, rubbing his chin. "This has entertainment written all over it."

Calvin and Hobbes left the school once the bell rang.

People were still laughing at Susie.

Calvin nervously watched Susie, who was growling angrily at him.

"I feel somewhat guilty," he said to Hobbes. "Maybe this was a bad idea."

"Awww…," said Hobbes. "Feeling sorry the woman of your dreams?"

Calvin yanked Hobbes down to be eye level with him.

"Don't even start," he said calmly.

Hobbes backed away sheepishly.

When Calvin is calm in a situation like this, you know better than to tick him off.

"Where's Socrates? I need to have a word with him," Calvin continued.

Socrates suddenly popped out of a bush.

"Present!" he said. "What'd you think? Pretty good, huh?"

Calvin eyed him.

"Uh… Actually, I think you might have laid it a little thick. I mean, don't get me wrong. I thought it was good. I just think you might have been a little harsh."

Socrates simply grinned.

"Well, don't ask me to do anything about it. It's in the lord's hands now," he said.

"Actually, Susie seemed quite intent on fighting fire with fire," Hobbes said, watching Susie walk away. "I think it's safe to say that Socrates' meddling has turned this into a smear campaign."

"Huh?" asked Calvin. "But I was planning on doing this honestly! Is it now at the day and age where even friendly school competitions have to be filthy?!"

"Welcome to the real world, Calvin," said Socrates, patting him on the shoulder.

Calvin sighed.

"Well, what happens now?" he asked.

"Well, next up is the campaign," said Hobbes. "Any ideas?"

"Hmmm…," Calvin pondered. "Well, first things first! I need a campaign slogan!"

"Taken care of," said Hobbes.

Calvin stared at the sign that Hobbes had painted.

VOTE FOR CALVIN FOR SCHOOL PRESIDENT
A SIMPLE MIND FOR SIMPLE PEOPLE

Calvin arched an eyebrow.

Hobbes looked proud.

"Well? What do you think?" he asked.

"……Simple mind?" Calvin asked, rubbing his chin.

"It's great, isn't it?!"

"Uh…"

Socrates suddenly barged in carrying a box.

"Okay. I got the buttons you wanted, Calvin," he said. "I made them sticky so as to avoid stabbing people in the heart."

"Very good," said Calvin, picking one up. "These shall do nicely."

"Oh! And I made us some straw hats with Calvin's name on them for good measure!" Socrates added, pulling out three straw hats.

Hobbes put his on.

"Fancy," he commented.

"Good work. Anything else?" Calvin asked.

"Just your speech," Socrates said, pulling out some note cards.

"Huh?"

Hobbes stared at him.

"You do know you have to give your speech tomorrow, right?" he asked.

"What?! I thought I had more time than that! I've only just signed up!"

"Things move quickly in the politics world," Socrates said, handing him the note cards.

Before Calvin could start reading it over, they heard something outside.

Calvin and Hobbes looked outside in the street.

They were surprised to see a line of girls walking down the street holding a banner that said,

DON'T LET CALVIN RUIN OUR SCHOOL!
VOTE FOR SUSIE! SHE'S REALLY COOL!

Calvin stared at it.

"That's weak," he scoffed.

Then Susie raised a picture of Calvin picking his nose.

Everyone's eyes bugged out.

"That one looked pretty strong," said Hobbes.

"Oh please, that's nothing!" Socrates snorted. "Calvin, you've already thrown the first punch. People will see this as petty revenge. You've got this competition in the bag!"

"I don't know about this…," Calvin said unsurely. "Maybe I shouldn't even be running in the first place! I don't even know the name of my school!"

"Your school has a name?" Hobbes asked.

"Just look over the speech I gave you," Socrates said supportively. "You'll do great!"

Calvin simply sighed and looked at the note cards.

" Four score and seven years ago, I had a dream," Calvin read.

"Huh. It's only been one sentence, and already, you've ripped off two people," Hobbes commented.

"Thanks anyway, Socrates," Calvin said, handing him back the cards. "But I think I'll try to win with what I really think, all right?"

"But in this speech, you promise to cure the common cold!" Socrates said.

Calvin gave him a look.

"Eh, suit yourself," Socrates sighed. "See you later."

Socrates left.

Calvin got out a piece of paper and a pencil and sat down at his desk.

The next day, the school auditorium was packed.

Calvin stood backstage looking out at everyone.

For once in his life, Calvin actually felt a little unsure of himself.

Susie, on the other hand, looked calm and regal.

"Don't take the rejection too hard, Calvin," Susie said condescendingly. "When I'm president, I'll still think of you from time to time."

Calvin glared.

"Oh, don't get all high and mighty on me now, Derkins," Calvin glared, pointing angrily at her. "We've both insulted each other once. Let's just put it all behind us!"

"You wish," Susie snorted. "You started this war, Calvin, and I intend to end it."

Calvin growled.

"We'll just see about that, you big giant nerd!" he yelled, and he went further backstage.

Susie simply grinned evilly at him and prepared to go onstage.

Calvin sat in a chair nearby and pulled out a walky-talky.

"Boy Genius to White Fang. Come in, White Fang. Over," he said.

Hobbes' staticy reply came through.

"Can't I ever have a consistent codename? Over." he demanded.

"Never mind. I'm going onstage after Susie. How the heck am I supposed to follow her act? Over."

"Well, what do you think might be holding you back from winning? Over."

"Well, there's the fact that she actually cares about the school. Over."

"Ooh. Yeah, that might put a damper on the whole process. Over."

"How are you and Socrates doing? Over."

"We tried to give out buttons and flags and junk, but the people on the street just ignored us for some reason. Over."

"Huh. Oh well. We'll talk later. Over and out."

Calvin put the walky-talky away and watched.

Susie was heading out onto the stage.

Calvin covered his eyes and listened.

"Fellow students," Susie began.

Calvin nearly barfed.

"I shall start by talking about what will happen if you don't vote for me," she said.

Calvin looked up.

"Do you really want the school run by Calvin?" she asked. "The boy who has an ego the size of a VW van? The boy who constantly fails at everything he tries? The boy who talks to a tiger all day? I tell you, the school would be in anarchy if run by him."

Calvin was staring at Susie with a stunned look on his face.

"If you vote for me, after-school activities would be far more enjoyable. More school functions to raise money would be started. Vote for me, and you'll never fail again!" she finished strongly.

People clapped.

Calvin was staring at her in surprise.

"That was…almost attractive," Calvin thought to himself.

Susie grinned smugly at Calvin.

Calvin simply glared at her and walked up to the podium.

Unsurely, Calvin leaned into the microphone.

"Thank you, fellow student-onion-ites," he said unsurely.

Susie rolled her eyes.

"Anyway, I'm here because I want to do something for this school, but unfortunately, the school board wouldn't allow it, so I don't have much to offer you. All I have are insults that the other candidate has thrown at me. Sure, Susie may have the bigger vocabulary, the better grades, and she might be a half-decent speech-giver…"

Calvin suddenly stopped, racking his brain.

"Uh, I'm pretty sure I was going somewhere with this," he said.

Susie chuckled.

Then Calvin had an idea.

"Look, the point is…SUSIE DERKINS IS A SNOB!" he yelled.

Everyone gasped.

Susie's eyes bugged open.

"That's right!" Calvin went on, finding that he had struck a nerve. "She looks down on those who do mildly worse than her. She berates the barely smart. She constantly puts me down! THE WOMAN HAS NO IMAGINATION! SHE CAN'T EVEN PLAY A DECENT GAME OF 'MAKE-BELIEVE'! IT'S PERFECTLY NATURAL TO GIVE A SNOWMAN A LOBOTOMY, SUSIE! STOP BEING SO CLOSED-MINDED!!!"

Everyone clapped and cheered.

Calvin held up a hand for silence.

"I'll just say this…," he said. "Vote for me, Calvin, and I shall blow…your…minds!"

And he gave the double-peace sign, also known as the Nixon.

Everyone cheered.

Calvin got down and walked past Susie, who was staring at him.

"Put that in your pipe and smoke it, sister," Calvin simply said, snapping his finger at her as he walked past.

Susie continued to watch him leave.

A projected picture of Calvin was shown on a screen.

"I've seen enough," said Susie, turning it off.

Candace sat next to her.

"After that speech of his, I'd say you're sunk," she said.

"I wouldn't go that far," said Susie. "There must be something we can do. Some sort of humiliating thing in his past. Something big!"

"How about the Noodle Incident?" Candace asked.

"Nah, everyone knows about that," said Susie, sitting down. "It would take a lot to bring him down far enough to the point where he can't win."

Candace thought about it.

"You know, I may just have an idea," she said. "What if he were to drop out of the race?"

"What would it take to do that?" Susie asked.

Candace thought for a moment, and then started grinning.

In a dark alley, Calvin arrived. He was wearing a blue jacket with the hood over his head to avoid being detected.

"The dame had been real persuasive over the phone," Tracer Bullet thought. "She said she wanted to meet on Fifth and Main in the dark alley. It was clichéd, but I don't miss an opportunity to stop a potential crime. All the good detectives do it. I'd better play along for now."

Another figure in a coat was at the end of the alley, leaning against the wall.

"I saw my contact at the end of the alley. She looked like she could handle a gun, as well as a meatball sub. She should probably work out more."

The figure looked up at him.

It was Candace.

"Calvin," she said.

"Candace?" Calvin asked, staring at her.

"It was an accomplice of the Derkins dame. It was beginning to become a bit clearer, but there was still some fog on the horizon. It's time to put on my high-beams and get to the other side of this cloud."

"What do you want, toots?" Calvin asked, arching an eyebrow.

"Calvin, this election means a lot to Susie," Candace said. "If you drop out of the race for us, Susie's first act as president will be to make you the hall monitor."

Calvin watched her intently.

"Evidently, the dame expected me to sellout. I wanted to give her what for, but first I had to figure the angles out."

"Why would I want to be hall monitor?" Calvin asked.

"Because when the hall monitor looks the other way, the president gives him an envelope."

"Well, what if he doesn't look the other way?"

"He always looks the other way."

"What's so special about the other way?"

"The envelope is special!"

"What's in the envelope?"

Candace chuckled slightly.

"I can't tell you what's in the envelope."

"Well, you don't have to, but I sure would appreciate it."

"Look, what will it take you to drop out of this race?" Candace continued, clearly annoyed.

"You'd have to pry it from my cold dead hands, kid," Calvin said, taking the toothpick from his mouth. "If you think you can buy me off, you're lower than the South Pole, and that's pretty low."

Candace grumbled, and then fled.

"It was becoming all too clear that this went further down than it seemed. I made a silent vow to never let myself drop to that level. I would just have to wait until the results came in to do anything else."

Calvin left the alley in disgust.

The next day at school, Calvin saw Susie at her locker. He approached her.

"Listen, Derkins," he said, pointing a finger at her. "Tell your little four-eyed accomplice that I'm not taking bribes, okay?"

"Huh?" Susie asked.

"I've said my piece," Calvin said, walking away.

Susie watched him leave.

Then she looked at Candace, who simply looked back sheepishly.

"Oh, Candace, you didn't…," she sighed.

A few days later, Calvin was in his room.

Hobbes and Socrates were there as well, putting away picket signs and boxes of buttons and flags.

Everything said, VOTE 4 CALVIN or CALVIN FOR PREZ.

"Guys, I'm beginning to have fourth thoughts about this election," he said, lying on the bed.

"What do you mean?" asked Hobbes, putting the straw hats away.

"Well, this whole scandal thing is beginning to take a toll on my conscience. Then of course, there's the added bonus that I don't really know what to do as president."

"You should've run for vice-president. They're the ones that run things for real," Socrates said.

"Hobbes, what should I do? I can't back out now! I'm too far deep!" Calvin whined.

"Just sit it out! Odds are that you're not going to win anyway, and besides, it's just a friendly competition," Hobbes said.

Calvin sighed.

"Why was I made so brilliant, and yet so competitive?" he asked the sky. "It would be better if the winner wasn't left with a big responsibility!"

Socrates simply grinned.

"Don't worry. Maybe things will go your way tomorrow," he said.

"How?"

"Oh, you'll see," Socrates said mysteriously.

And with that, he departed.

Calvin and Hobbes watched him leave.

"He's scary," Calvin sighed.

Hobbes nodded.

The next day was the voting day, and a bunch of students went into the booths.

Calvin and Hobbes stood at the sidelines.

"How do you think I'm doing?" Calvin asked.

"Bombing," Hobbes said, not looking up from his comic book.

Calvin rolled his eyes.

Then he saw Susie nearby.

Calvin glared at her.

She glared right back at him.

"Come on, Hobbes," he said. "The view just got ugly."

He picked Hobbes up and walked away.

Later that day, Hobbes had already gone home. He was in the bedroom reading another comic book.

Suddenly, the door burst open.

WHAM!

Hobbes listened to the footsteps get louder and louder as Calvin ran to the room.

The door then exploded open.

WHAM!

Calvin was looking at Hobbes with a strange expression.

It was a mixture of anger and happiness.

"Hey. How'd it go?" he asked.

"I LOST!" Calvin shouted angrily.

Then his face changed completely.

"I LOST!" he shouted again, but this time he looked happy.

"I'm sensing some mixed emotions here," Hobbes commented.

"Well, I'm angry that I was humiliated during the campaign and that I used up a perfectly good slander speech against Susie for nothing, but I'm happy that I don't have the responsibilities!"

"So…you just don't know what to do with yourself, do you?" Hobbes asked.

"Yeah, so I'm just going to let this recede into the background and forget it ever happened."

DING-DONG!

Calvin looked up.

"Uh…maybe I should get that," he said.

"Go for it," Hobbes said, not looking up.

Calvin walked downstairs and answered the door.

It was Susie.

"Oh…Derkins," Calvin said, eyeing her suspiciously. "What are you doing here? If it's to gloat, make it quick. I have better things to do."

"Look, Calvin, I just wanted to apologize," she said.

Calvin stared.

"Seriously?" he asked.

Susie nodded.

Calvin was tempted to say something rude in response, but for some reason, he felt a strange change of heart.

"Um…thank you, Susie," he said awkwardly. "And I suppose…I myself…am also…sorry…for what I did…and said…during this campaign…Susie."

Susie couldn't help but grin.

"Really?"

"Yeah, I suppose my methods were ruthless and rude, but I guess it all worked out in the end. You won the election, and our school can bow down under your gaze."

"Actually, I didn't win either," she said.

Calvin's eyes popped open.

"Huh?!" he asked.

"Yeah, some kid named Elliot won," she said.

Calvin stared at her with wider eyes.

"Huh, that explains his attitude yesterday," Calvin muttered, thinking back.

"Huh?"

"Uh, nothing!" Calvin said quickly. "So…neither of us won?"

"Ironic, huh?"

"Very."

There was an awkward pause.

"Well, thanks of apologizing," Calvin said.

"And you," said Susie.

Calvin went to close the door, but before doing so, he looked at Susie again.

"You know, Susie," he said slowly. "For a slimy girl, you're actually pretty cool."

Susie beamed.

"Really?!" she asked.

"As long as you don't tell anyone," Calvin sighed, closing the door.

The minute the door was shut, Calvin gagged to himself.

"Man, that was sappy!" he grunted.

And he went upstairs to fill up some water balloons.

The End

Voice Work

Pamela Segall Adlon: Calvin
Tom Hanks: Hobbes
Ryan Stiles: Socrates
Dakota Fanning: Susie Derkins
Lauren Tom: Candace
Jennifer Love Hewitt: Mom

Coming up Next: Roughin' It