A/N: Hello there! First order of business, only a few more chapters left! I'm so excited to deliver you guys the ending, it's been an absolute blast. It's definitely a lot darker and angstier (the story, not the ending) than I first intended, but I'm really enjoying it. I would definitely love to hear what you guys think!

Second order of business: the Season Finale. Bawled my eyes out. That is all.

Love all of you. :)

Chapter 19

"My hands are tied here, Neal."

"And I get that, I do. I really do, but this is important."

"I understand. But you are two days into a five day watch."

"Suicide watch," Neal reminds him, almost as though to poke fun at the lengths Peter has taken now. Peter doesn't find it funny one bit.

"I can't let you go by yourself."

"Sisley can take me."

"Sisley is currently under investigation in this case. I wouldn't trust it. And she'll most likely be drunk. You can't be around that, you know that." Ever since Neal told Peter about her involvement in the human trafficking business, she has been steadily rising to the top of the list of suspects in Wilcox's murder.

Neal sighs, crossing his arms and searching the floor. "Yeah. Yeah, I do know that." He looks up again, his face pained. "It's not getting any easier, it's getting harder."

"The best things in life never come for free."

Neal smirks. "I'll remember that. You been hanging around Mozzie?"

Peter shrugs. "I may have. We actually have quite a bit in common."

Neal chuckles at this. "Enlighten me."

Peter considers, then locks his eyes on Neal's. "We both want you to stick around."

Neal sighs, looking at the floor. It takes him a moment, but he finally speaks, still looking down. "I need a meeting today, Peter. Please."

Peter nods quickly. He knows, he knows. "El can take you."

"I'm not pulling her out of work again."

"Jones will take you."

"You're kidding."

"Diana will take you."

Neal throws up his hands. "Damn it, Peter, forget I asked."

Neal knows his reputation doesn't help him here, but after waking up alive, a shift has occurred within him. All he wants is to beat this thing. He tried to end it all, but that didn't work, and he can't keep living like this, so his only option is to fix it. He has to, and the one thing he needs right now is to be reminded by a group of people in the same situation as him that it's possible. All he wants to do is go to a meeting, but he understands why Peter doesn't trust him.

The older man is studying him, and he leans back in his chair, crossing his arms behind his head, and after a moment, he looks down, sighing. He doesn't look up when he speaks. "Come on. Let's go." He shifts to get up, and Neal just watches him, raising his eyebrows. Peter glances over at him when he's shrugging on his coat. "I'll take you."

Neal shakes his head, looking down. "No, no way. I'm not getting in the way of your work," he finishes, studying the desk, and Peter breezes past him on his way out the door, stopping right outside the office to glance back at Neal.

"Are you coming or not?"

Neal sighs, and shoves his hands in his pockets, following Peter out the door.

As soon as Peter and Neal enter the space, the tension is palpable. Neal grabs two cups of coffee, bringing one over to Peter and sipping at his own, his other hand in his pocket. They both have to consciously keep themselves from sticking out their tongues and grimacing at the taste, and Peter chuckles, shaking his head. The humor is lost, however, when Peter's face turns to stone, and Neal turns around to find what has sparked this reaction.

Sisley has wandered in the door, clearly having trouble staying on her feet, and Neal just sighs, keeping his head down. He prays things go well and she doesn't make a scene.

Of course, that would only happen in a world where things go right for Neal, and unfortunately, that's not the world he lives in. He squeezes his eyes shut when he hears her uneven steps behind him, bringing two fingers to his temple. Peter takes a sharp inhale, bracing himself and straightening up, putting his hands on his hips so his badge glimmers when the light from the stained glass windows catches it.

"Sisley," he nods to her, voice stern. She doesn't even acknowledge Neal, just breezing past him and getting in Peter's face.

"Why're you looking into me," she demands, slurring, and Peter stays the course, studying her.

He cocks his head. "We have reason to believe you are involved in the case I'm currently investigating."

She giggles, leaning over against Neal to keep from falling, and he frowns, lifting her up off of him. Once she's steady, he steps slightly to the left, keeping his distance. This is work, not play. Her face falls slightly, and she looks down.

"What reasons are those?" she asks, quiet, and Peter raises his eyebrows, crossing his arms.

"Those aren't details I'm permitted to discuss with you." He shifts, nodding once at Neal, who looks down in response, shoving his hands in his pockets.

She glances up at Neal. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

He sighs. "We're about to start-"

"Please."

After a moment, he gives Peter the nod that it's okay for him to take a seat, and they walk a few feet away.

When they're out of earshot, she looks up at him, her face pained and her voice cracking. "They think I did it."

"I know-"

"They searched my home, Neal. They found some things."

Neal stands up a little straighter. "What kinds of things?"

She looks through him, avoiding making contact with his eyes. "The wine. The money books." She pauses, and her voice is a little lower. "The needles."

Neal furrows his brows. "What?"

"The same kind used to kill Wilcox. They think I did it."

He just looks down, and speaks after a moment. "Shit."

"Yeah."

"We're going to go take our seats, you should do the same," Melissa calls over, and Sisley sighs, looking back at Neal, her face pleading. He just gives her a reassuring look, shaking his head to tell her now isn't the time.

When they sit, Neal leans back a bit in the chair, sighing as he rolls up his sleeves, and Peter glances over at him. A small detail catches his eye, and he double-takes. He squeezes his eyes shut, exhaling sharply, and stands just as Melissa is welcoming the group. He quickly yanks Neal up by the arm and drags him outside, Neal stumbling behind him, confused.

As soon as they're outside, Neal just shakes his head, eyes wide. "What the…what the hell, Peter!"

Peter is pacing, his hands on his hips, furious, and he glances up at Neal and stops, pointing a finger at his friend. "No, no, you don't get to say that to me."

"What are you talking-"

Peter cuts him off, grabbing Neal's shirt and pushing up the sleeve a bit more, holding up his bruised and pock-marked arm. "This. This, is what I'm talking about. What the hell is this, Neal?!"

Neal stops, just staring at Peter, who is taking heaving breaths, and after a moment, Neal glances down, searching the concrete, mouth open slightly as he tries to find the words. "That's… I stopped."

"Bullshit, you stopped; these aren't more than a week old."

Neal pauses again, this time searching the sky, and he yanks his arm back, crossing them behind his head as he paces a bit, exhaling sharply. When he finally stops again, he brings his eyes up to meet Peter's, which burn with anger, and a tinge of sadness. Neal's voice is barely above a quiet mutter. "Listen." He hesitates, and tries again. "Listen. It happened about a week ago. I tried it before you found me on the roof."

Peter stops at this, blinking, then he searches the ground, bringing two fingers to his temple. It takes a moment, but he connects the dots: it was another attempt of Neal's to take his life. "You…"

Neal doesn't move, studying the ground. "Yeah." He pauses. "I haven't used...since."

Peter inhales shakily, before glancing back up at Neal, his eyes sad, but tinged with darkness. He feels so betrayed. "I don't believe you."

Neal sighs, throwing up his hands before pacing around a bit. "I don't expect you to." Peter studies his friend for a moment, narrowing his eyes with concern, lightly shaking his head. Trying to figure him out. Neal glances up, stopping when he notices Peter's stare boring into him. "What."

Peter shakes his head again, scoffing and glancing down, his voice sad. Almost incredulous. "What the hell happened to you?"

Neal blinks at this, then looks up at the sky, crossing his arms and tapping a foot. After a moment, he looks down. "I'm sorry, Peter."

The worst part of all of this is disappointing Peter, time and time again. No matter how much the older man tries to help him, it's all for nothing, because Neal just can't get his shit together. "I don't even know who you are anymore."

Neal shrugs at this, eyes cast down as he raises his eyebrows. "Neither do I."

A quick shake of Peter's head tells Neal he's not done. "It's disappointing. I put everything into rebuilding you and your life and your career. We had a good thing going, you didn't need to go and screw it up like this."

Neal closes in, crossing his arms, and looks down, nodding.

"Let's…" Peter sighs. "Let's get you inside. We'll talk about this later."

Neal raises his eyebrows, just nodding. As though he'll be able to focus on anything happening in the meeting now that Peter has called him a disappointment.

Later that night, Peter has approached Neal at the table, sliding a pamphlet across the surface.

"You have got to be kidding me," Neal says, glancing over it.

"Deadly serious, Neal."

"So now this is an ultimatum."

"It's a decision I'm asking you to make. It very well may save your damn life, I wouldn't pass it up."

The table of the Burke's home has become a war zone, and Neal is shaking with both anxiety and rage as he looks over the details of what Peter wants him to do.

"But if I don't go, you'll throw me back in jail."

Peter pauses for a moment, and looks down, nodding. "Yes. Yes, I will, because this is what I should have done when this first started, but I wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt and see if you could work it out yourself. You couldn't. I don't have any other choice, Neal. I'm not giving up on you."

"That's not really your decision to make."

"It kind of is."

Neal sighs, scanning over the details of the program. "What the hell am I even going to do all day? Talk about my problems? I'll lose my mind, Peter."

"That's not what this is, Neal. Just read what it says."

Neal sighs, scanning over the pages, drumming his fingers on the table. After a moment, he glances back up at Peter, sighing again, admitting defeat. "Okay."

Peter looks up at this. "Okay?"

Neal nods, scoffing and pushing the pamphlet back across the table. "Yeah, okay. It's not like you're giving me any other option."

A small smile plays on Peter's lips. "You're right. I'm not."

"Peter-"

"Don't. You'll forgive me someday."

Neal scoffs with a weak smile. "Doubtful."

The scene is reminiscent of a child's first day of school. Peter and Elizabeth hold Neal's bags, basking like proud parents, and Neal is just standing there sulking. Well, as close to sulking as Neal can get.

This is going to be a nightmare.

Peter shrugs when they wander into Neal's new home, frowning. "Nice digs. Not bad."

Neal glances over at him as he pulls the messenger bag off his shoulder. "Please never say 'digs' ever again." Elizabeth chuckles as she makes Neal's bed, and he rushes over. "Hey, hey, I've got that. You relax."

Elizabeth smiles, doting on him. "You go relax, you're about to begin camp."

"Oh, we're calling it camp now."

Peter shrugs. "It sounds more exciting that way."

Neal glares over at Peter. "Let's not make this something it isn't. You're forcing me to be here. I'm not exactly thrilled."

A small smile dances on Elizabeth's lips as she finishes the bed, and Neal sits on a chair in the corner, flipping through the orientation packet. This is college. This is summer camp.

This is an absolute nightmare.

"7 AM, Rise and shine."

"At least they're positive about it," El offers, shrugging.

"Is the shining required?" Peter wonders aloud, and Neal stifles a laugh as he continues reading.

"8 AM, Breakfast, Rounds, and Community Group. 8:45 AM, Daily Preparation…what does that even mean?" Peter chuckles. "9 AM, Lecture- see, this is college." El snickers, and Peter stands by the window, looking out at the view, his hands clasped behind his back.

"-11 AM, Big Group. 12 PM, Lunch. 12:45 PM, Free Time. 2 PM, Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy…Wow. 3 PM, One-on-One. 3:45 PM, Activity…" He looks at Peter, furrowing his brows. "Like finger painting?"

Peter scoffs. "I should hope not."

El shrugs. "Maybe it's knitting."

"Or archery," Peter offers, nodding.

"Or ballet."

"Or-"

"Yeah, I'll let it be a surprise," Neal announces, holding up a hand. "Please just stop." Peter and El have to keep themselves from laughing and Neal just smirks as he shakes his head, turning his attention back to the pamphlet. "5 PM, Free Time. 6:30 PM, Dinner. 7:15 PM, Reflection. 7:30 PM, Free Time. 11 PM, Curfew." He sighs, dropping it on the end table. "Great."

Peter looks at his hands, before glancing up at Neal, his voice low. "We're proud of you, for being here."

Neal nods, looking down. "Yeah."

"Really." Peter adds this, slipping a hand into his pocket and slapping Neal's shoulder. Neal smirks.

"Can't say I feel the same, but at least I'm dipping my toes in."

El smirks, and a woman appears in the doorway, perhaps a few years older than Neal. She's by no means shapeless, but she's extremely slender, almost delicate. The volume of her deep red hair contrasts it; it curls in Shirley Temple-esque ringlets and has no rhyme or reason.

"Hi, Neal?"

He looks up, nodding, slipping his hands in his pockets. "That's me."

She smiles, and steps in, extending a hand. "Great to meet you, Neal. I'm Camille, I'm one of the members of your team."

Peter raises his eyebrows. "You have a team." Neal grins, rocking back on his heels.

"It's so nice to meet you, Camille." He glances back at Peter, then smiles at her. "So, uh… which member of my team, are you?"

She gives him a knowing smile, there's a hint of reprimanding in it. "I'll be your counselor, Neal." She emphasizes the word, so he knows she's serious. El has to stifle a small snicker, and Peter shoots her a glare. Camille motions to Peter and El. "Is this your family?"

Neal widens his eyes, and Peter clears his throat. No one knows how to react for a moment, until El straightens up. "Yes. This is Peter, Neal's…father. And I'm Elizabeth. His…step…mother."

Neal's eyes open even wider and he searches the floor. Peter just stands there, unsure of what to do next. Camille smiles.

"You have a beautiful family."

Neal looks up at this, plastering on a very fake grin and speaking through his teeth. "Thank you so much."

"Of course," Camille replies, holding open the door. "We're getting started, if you'd all like to join us in the West Hall. Five minutes."

Peter just gives her a tight-lipped smile, Neal scratches his head, looking down, and El sighs, stepping forward and breaking the awkward silence. "Thank you so much, Camille. We'll see you in five."

Camille smiles, and takes one more look at the three of them before breezing down the hall to the next room.

Neal sinks onto the bed, head in his hands, and Peter stares at El. What the hell was that? She just shrugs.

+++++++++

"Neal?"

The young man doesn't respond. He's sitting at a table in the lounge, the fingers of one hand wrapped around a cup of coffee, the other hand drumming against the table.

"Neal. How're you doing?"

After a moment, the younger man looks up, and opens his mouth to speak, then closes it again, shaking his head. "I'm… Yeah, I'm okay."

Peter sighs at this, leaning back in the chair. "How's it going over here?"

Neal scoffs, searching the ceiling as he takes a swig of his coffee. "There are worse places to be."

His mentor chuckles at this, looking at the table. "You're right." He pauses. "There are. What have you been up to?"

Neal glances around the room, surveying his surroundings; the environment, the space, the people. "Just… keeping busy. Wish I was at work."

"Staying positive?" Neal shrugs both his shoulders, cocking his head as he sips his coffee. "That's good."

"Any updates on the case?" Neal casually asks, looking down at his coffee when he does. Peter hesitates.

"Not much in the way of hard facts. Lots more speculation."

Neal's quiet. "Is she still at the top of the list?"

Peter nods, keeping his eyes locked on Neal's. "Yes."

"You know she didn't do it. She had the needles to protect me, Peter."

"I know what she was trying to do, but it doesn't look good. There's more evidence against her than Thompson, at this point, and he's out of the country in two days."

Neal shakes his head, lightly pounding a fist on the table over and over as he shakes his head. "I can't let her go down for this, Peter," he finally says, glancing up.

"Why are you so sure it wasn't her?"

Neal hesitates, studying the people behind Peter. "I am, okay?"

"I'm sure you're sure, but I can't say for sure that I'm sure."

Neal cocks his head. "Huh?" Peter shakes his head, waving it off.

He hesitates, then, after a moment: "So. Week one under your belt." A brief pause, and he lowers his voice. "Talk to me, Neal. How are you really feeling?"

Neal sighs, glancing to the side, before looking up and meeting Peter's eyes. "Honestly?" Peter gives him a curt nod. Neal shrugs. "The same as I did before I came. The lectures are interesting, but it's nothing I don't already know. The community is fine, and everything, I'm just…" He lowers his voice further. "I feel just as bad as I did before I got here."

Peter sighs at this, leaning back in the chair. "I understand, Neal. I do. But if you take anything from this, even if it's something like staying clean for 26 days straight, I'll take it."

Neal scoffs. "Yeah. At this point, I'll take what I can get."

Peter smirks, looking down. "That's all I'm asking for."

Even if Neal won't admit it, there's something different. It's a light in his eyes, that wasn't there in the months prior to him coming here. Perhaps it's just that they're no longer blood-shot and red-rimmed at all hours, but whatever it is, it looks good to Peter. He's been keeping tabs on Neal, checking in, pulling rank for details, and everyone has said what a delight Neal is to be around. Peter laughed at this. They don't need to tell him how wonderful, intelligent, charming and kind-hearted Neal is, Peter knows that already. He just wants to hear his friend is happy and healthy.

That's all he wants, more than anything, is for Neal to find happiness, and he hopes to God that Neal finds it here.