Santana and Brittany stand outside in the cool night air inspecting the huge building that looms before them.
"Holy shit. What have we gotten ourselves into?"
"It looks like a museum. Like I'm pretty sure there are mummies up in this shit."
The Latina chuckles at her friend's joke. "Well, I'm sure we'll see some corpses at least."
"People actually live here?"
"I think the term 'live' is up for interpretation… Guess we better get this over with, eh?" She extends her hand to the blonde who quickly grabs it.
"You'll be okay. I'm here."
The girls make their way up the marble steps and are escorted inside by the doorman. Upon seeing the lavish interior of the house, they both freeze in their tracks for a beat.
"This isn't real life," Brittany says in disbelief.
Servers walk around serving food and drinks as throngs of elegant people pass them by whilst nonchalantly chattering amongst themselves. A grand staircase is on the far left side of the room, the walls aligned with paintings that look like they cost as much as the house. The rooms seem never-ending as there's one to both their left and right; one appears to be more of a lounge and the other more of a ballroom as there's a live orchestra playing while people either dance or stand to the side to listen.
"How are we supposed to find anyone in this place?" Santana mutters.
"Hello. And you are?"
The voice startles them as they spin around to see a rather striking middle-aged woman looking them over. Her skin is taut despite her age and she has the same shark eyes as Anna, though while Anna's are endearing, hers cut through them like knives. She wears a white and black woman's suit that shows off her toned body and heels that make her seem even taller than she already is.
For once in her life, Santana is at a loss for words. "We're—"
The lady looks down and sees them holding hands. "Friends of Anna's no doubt." She narrows her eyes making them feel uneasy. She studies them for a while before deciding they pose no real threat. "Well… I have no idea where she is at the moment. I'm sure she'll be along shortly. Have a drink." She raises her wineglass in suggestion and wanders off to greet someone who seems to be more worthy of her time, as her eyes seem to light up as she approaches them.
Santana turns her attention back to Brittany. "God, she's terrifying… I'm so glad I'm not Quinn."
"Where are they by the way? Do you think you should text them?"
The Latina pulls out her phone and as if on cue, Anna and Quinn suddenly materialize on the grand staircase. She watches as the green-eyed girl makes her way down the stairs wearing a pretty white dress that shows off her lean body. Though her red lipstick makes it hard to focus elsewhere. She seems to feel Santana's eyes on her as she meets them for a moment before she turns her attention to the people who greet her at the bottom steps.
"Guess I won't be needing this after all," Santana says as she puts the phone back in her clutch. "Maybe we should take Mrs. Porter up on that drink offer."
"Already got it covered." Britt says in a whisper. "See, that one over there?" She points to one of the servers in the corner of the room. "He looks like he has some good shit. I'll be right back."
As she excuses herself, Quinn finally manages to break through the crowd and make her way over to her. The brunette takes a breath, bracing herself for whatever's going to happen next.
"Hi," The blonde says huskily. Even though it's a simple greeting, she says it lightly because as soon as the words leave her mouth, she breaks out into one of her biggest grins.
Seeing her smile causes Santana to return the favor. "Hi."
"I'm really glad you could make it… I'm still a bit nervous." Her eyes seem to twinkle with excitement but her brow scrunches up a bit in worry.
"Don't be… I will be the first to admit that Mrs. Porter is slightly terrifying but I'm sure you'll be fine. After all, who could resist that smile?"
The compliment sends a slight hint of color to the girl's cheeks as she smiles even wider. "You always make me feel better about things."
The Latina allows a slight hint of concern to play across her features. "Do I? Q, about the other night—"
Quinn quickly reaches out to grab her forearm, her expression suddenly very sincere. "Don't even worry about it. Truly. I said some awful things… I think I needed to get some things off my chest and no matter how bad it felt to say them the other night, I feel better now to be able to let it go. You showing up tonight means the world to me… I wasn't sure you would come."
"Of course I came. I deserved some of the things you said… At the end of the day, I just want you to be happy."
"I know that now. I don't think I wanted to see it before."
"What changed your mind?"
"All of the little things just added up. I think I always knew, I just didn't want to let myself get hurt again."
The brunette is still processing everything as Brittany appears with two drinks in hand. "Hey Quinn!" She gives the girl a friendly hug before turning to Santana and asking playfully, "May I interest you in a drink?"
"Thanks, Britt," The Latina responds with a smile as she accepts the drink, her gaze never leaving the girl in the white dress for more than a second.
Anna makes her way over and gives Quinn a small hug as she wraps her arms around her waist. "Hey, everyone." She notices the wineglasses in the other girls' hands and grins. "How's the wine?"
"Pretty good actually," Britt responds cheerily. "I'm not even much of a wine drinker but this is so good."
"Should be. I think it's like a hundred dollars a bottle." The girl nearly chokes on her next sip, which causes Anna to chuckle lightly. "My mother is something else, huh?"
"You got that right." The woman interrupts, appearing behind them. "Anna, must we be so blasé with the PDA?" Santana and Brittany quickly excuse themselves as she approaches.
"Seriously, mom? I gave her a hug that lasted like half a second."
"Not everyone here has your best interests at heart."
"I noticed. You're here, aren't you?"
The woman ignores her daughter's comment as she focuses in on the blonde standing next to you. "Quinn Fabray, nice to meet you."
"Yeah, you too, Mrs. Porter." She politely accepts the handshake and prays she doesn't feel how clammy they've suddenly become.
"Call me Glenn. Mrs. Porter just sounds so formal." Her shark eyes smile a bit, inspecting Quinn closely.
"Okay, Glenn…" When neither Porter seems to have anything further to say to the other one, the blonde tries to strike up polite conversation. "Thank you so much for doing all this. Anna and I are really—"
"Oh, it's no problem. This is the only way we get to meet any of Anna's little girlfriends."
"Oh, I—"
"Mom, I don't know why you find it so surprising that none of them will come here willingly. Where's Dad?"
Quinn swallows uncomfortably, inching closer to Anna.
"He'll be here sooner or later, dear. God knows what woman is holding him up. Ah, the district attorney is here, we'll continue this discussion later."
And just like that she disappears into the crowd leaving Anna and Quinn standing there, mortified by the conversation that just transpired. The dark eyed girl pulls the blonde closer to her. "I'm really sorry… Maybe we should just go…"
"No," Quinn says with a sudden look of determination. "She can't bully us. I've been through worse than this."
The other girl smiles at her words and gives her a little kiss on the cheek, and although she can't see her in the crowd, she knows her mother sees it. "You're incredible, babe."
Despite the smile that crosses her lips, a sudden uneasy feeling overcomes her that has nothing to do with Glenn or their surroundings. She finds herself searching for a familiar pair of brown eyes in the crowd, and when she doesn't see them, her heart drops a little.
Anna whispers in her ear. "Hey, so do you wanna grab some wine and dance a little?"
The blonde nods and they make their way toward the ballroom.
Brittany and Santana manage to find a corner of the ballroom where the other outcasts are hanging out. None of them are wearing $1,000 suits or paying much attention to them at all, which is just fine by them.
"So, how do you think that went?" The blonde says, nodding slightly in the direction of where the Porters and Quinn were standing earlier.
"No idea. The bitch seemed pissy as usual so I'm sure she didn't win any popularity votes with Q."
They spot Anna and Quinn now, as they make there way to the side of the ballroom, stopping to grab some wine from the nearest server.
"She looks happy, doesn't she?" Santana wonders out loud.
"Yeah, she does… Almost like a weight has been lifted off her shoulders."
The Latina looks somewhat downcast. "I think I might've been the weight."
"What do you mean, San?"
"I don't know… I don't think I can do this anymore… I think I have to let her go…"
"Why, Santana?" The blonde looks at her confused, recognizing the pain in her eyes.
"Just seeing her today makes me realize I'll never be able to offer her any of this. I'll never have parents to bring her home to. Anna is a good person… I think she loves her."
"That isn't the point. The point is whether or not Quinn loves her back."
"She will."
"Don't do this. You're going to make yourself unhappy again."
"Yeah, but I'm used to it. When I look at her, I can't be angry or selfish. I had my chance and I blew it. I'm not good enough for her. She's been through a lot of shit in her life and she deserves someone better than me. You should've heard me the other night… I told her I loved her but I said all the wrong things… I didn't realize how badly I had hurt her."
"So, you're giving up… The way she looks at you—"
"Brittany, it's okay."
The orchestra starts playing a familiar tune. Santana recognizes it almost immediately.
"This is such—"
"Meet me at the car."
And with a look of determination, she crosses the room to where the blonde stands, swaying gently to the music. She doesn't see Anna nearby, which relaxes her only slightly.
"Dance with me?"
Quinn looks surprised to see her there and quirks an eyebrow at her.
"It's one of your favorites, right? La Vie En Rose? Edith Piaf?"
The girl breaks out into another one of her grins as she takes her hand and they make their way to the dance floor. As she pulls her close, she breathes into her ear, "You remembered."
"I think I remember everything about that night…" Then trying to lighten the mood, she adds. "I still don't get this song."
"You will one day." Quinn teases.
The brunette tries to keep herself together as she holds onto her, feeling the familiar heat that she loves so much. She wants the song to last so much longer than she knows it's going to. Knowing that their time together is dwindling makes Santana's heartbeat quicken exponentially.
Not being able to think properly, she says the first thing that comes to her head. "I can't believe they're playing it here."
The blonde laughs softly and Santana can feel the slight movement of her body. "It's a very versatile song. They play it at weddings, receptions, cocktail parties, fancy occasions, all that kinda stuff."
Santana's arms seem to take on a will of their own as they hold her a little bit tighter, a sadness seeping into her words. "See, I don't know what I'd do without someone like you… I wouldn't have anyone to tell me these kinds of things."
Quinn's arms seem to return the favor as if they start to realize what's happening. A hint of panic surfaces in her words. "I suppose you'll find someone who's just as good at it as I am."
As the song reaches its final moments, Santana suddenly feels a sudden swell of courage. "Suppose, I told you I didn't want to…"
"Santana," The way the word leaves the girl's lips makes her heart feel like it's breaking and being filled to the brim all at once.
"Suppose you didn't come here with Anna…" She can feel the girl tremble slightly beneath her grasp.
"Suppose I never walked out on you…" Her heart catches in her chest. The song plays its final note.
"Suppose I told you…" She sees Anna now, making her way toward them.
"Well, I suppose I'm just being silly."
The blonde girl stays frozen for a long moment as Santana feels a certain wetness of what can only be tears fall onto her bare shoulder, their touch burning a hole straight through her. She tries to keep herself together as the girl finally responds in a choked whisper.
"I suppose so."
The Latina quickly loosens her grasp on the girl, as she can't bear to face Anna. She looks into Quinn's green and the sadness that radiates from them makes her want to hold her but she steels herself.
"Goodbye, subway girl."
Santana walks away right as Anna approaches Quinn. "Bye, Santana…" But they're words that never reach the brunette's ears. She's gone.
She pushes past all the idiots in their formal attire, her head pounding. Her heart feels like dead weight in her chest. A hand grabs one of her arms and pulls her back to reality. She sees Mrs. Porter looking at her but she pulls her arm away, anger at the woman suddenly taking a hold of her.
"You don't deserve her," She says simply and continues her way through the rest of the house before she's finally outside in the night air. She finally lets herself breathe, almost a little too heavily as she coughs after inhaling.
White. She only sees white.
She doesn't remember the drive back to her apartment; she doesn't remember how long it takes her to get there. When she finally reaches the confines of her bedroom, she lets herself cry. After a long while, she sits up in her bed, having made a decision.
She pulls out her phone and dials the number.
It rings four times.
She's about to give up when she hears the voice on the other end of the line.
"Hello?"
Her breath catches in her throat. "Ma?"
The voice doesn't answer but she can hear her breathing so she continues. "I don't expect you to say anything but I needed someone to talk to, okay? You owe me that much at least…"
She feels like breaking down again but when the woman doesn't hang up, she allows herself to keep talking. "There's this girl… I love her, Mama. I thought letting her go was the right thing to do, that's what people always say, right? Only it just feels like giving up... I don't know what to do, I've never felt this way about someone."
The voice doesn't answer. The long pause makes Santana's anger rise. Suddenly the voice says, "You aren't supposed to call us."
Tears of rage fall down the Latina's cheeks. She wants to yell at her, tell her how much she hurt her but there aren't any words left so she just lets herself cry. Finally, the voice speaks up again. "Listen mija, do what you have to do to be happy… If that means being with that girl then that's what you do. You fight cause you're a fighter… Don't call here again."
She hangs up. Santana keeps the phone pressed to her ear for a long while after she's gone, listening to the silence. Letting herself cry.
[\\]
Back at the benefit, things begin winding down. People are leaving as the orchestra plays the final song. The blonde girl stands outside on the balcony, enjoying the cool air. She feels a hand press against the small of her back and sees Anna standing there.
"You survived."
A small smile crosses her lips. "Barely."
But not for the reason you think.
"Anna, I think I made a mistake."
The other girl looks at her earnestly. "The dress? I really like this one."
"Not the dress."
"I know."
"What?" Quinn seems mortified.
"Vanilla girl… Santana, right?"
The blonde scrunches her features up, burying her face in her hands. "Wow, I'm really sorry…"
"It's okay. I thought you might come around but you looked so upset after she left that I knew…"
Quinn shakes her head a bit sadly. "The thing is, I kept trying to forget her. I thought it would go away eventually but when I see her, I can't help myself. I kept trying to look at someone and find that same feeling… You know, where you don't have to try… If that makes any sense… And with Santana, I don't have to try. I look at her and it's something that overtakes my whole body… Have you ever felt that way about someone?"
"Maybe once," The way she says it breaks Quinn's heart.
"I really am sorry."
Anna shakes her head, composing herself. "Love makes you do stupid things… I'll let you show yourself out."
"Anna…"
"I just need some time."
The girl walks away, leaving the blonde alone, staring at the dark sky. She closes her eyes and breathes the air in, letting it fill her lungs. The gesture fills her body with something that isn't just oxygen but a rather a breath of life filled with hope and wishes and vanilla. And when she finally releases it, she sees pink; she sees love. As she sighs softly to herself, a familiar melody begins to fill the night air.