A/N Happy New Year! Hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I did. :o)

Chapter 12

Lisbon knocked lightly on Emma's door but there was no answer. The door creaked open slowly as she pushed it open, finding Emma curled up on her pink down comforter. Lisbon moved into the room and sat on the edge of the bed. The girl's shoulders shook in silent sobs and Lisbon wasn't sure what to do. There were no appropriate words to explain to this little girl why she couldn't have parents. Lisbon learned early on that life wasn't fair and often, you simply have to accept what's thrown at you. It was a shame that Emma, too had to learn these things at such an early age.

Lisbon's thoughts gave her an idea, a starting point at least. "I lost my mum when I wasn't much older than you. My dad, he died not too long after."

Emma didn't respond but her silent whimpers slowed to sniffles and she turned her head in the crinkled covers to face Lisbon.

"I was the eldest so I had to take care of my brothers. Even though I had no mum of my own, I had to act like a parent for them."

"You had to be like a mommy and daddy for them?" Emma asked and then hiccupped while wiping at her eyes.

Lisbon nodded. "I was all they had and they were all I had. Family doesn't always mean having a mommy and a daddy. A family is sometimes just a group of people that love one another very much. Your grandparents, they love you more than you realize."

"And you and Trick?"

"We love you very much too." Lisbon assured.

Emma managed to sit up on her elbows. She slowly crawled over to Lisbon, kneeling in front of where Lisbon sat on the bed. "So we're all like a family?"

Lisbon wrapped her arms around Emma, resting her head on Emma's smaller one. "Yeah, in a way we are and even though my brothers and I are still family, we don't all live together. They all live far away but it doesn't mean I don't love them any less."

"Do you miss them?"

"All the time." She answered honestly.

"Me too; I mean I miss you and Trick all the time when you're not here."

"We both miss you too, very much, especially Jane. It's been a long time since he has had someone to really love." Lisbon was surprised at her openness with Emma as the thoughts just flowed out of her.

Emma grew silent and Lisbon didn't know what else to say so she looked around the girl's room instead. When her eyes focused on Emma's toy collection, she got an idea, or more like a Jane hunch.

"Out of all your toys, which one is your favorite?" Lisbon asked, nodding her chin toward the side of the room where they all sat on shelves and in bins.

Emma slid out from Lisbon's grasp and hopped off the bed. She then silently walked over to one of the shelves and picked up what looked like a porcelain doll dressed in a floral yellow dress. With doll in hand, she walked back over to the bed and sat next to Lisbon.

"This is Penny but she's not exactly a toy. My mom bought her for me last Christmas."

"She's very pretty." Lisbon observed, lightly fingering the ruffles in the doll's dress.

"Mom said she got her to look like me."

Lisbon had a good feeling she already knew the answer when she asked; "You don't play with her?"

Emma shook her head. "She's very f….f…. "

"Fragile?"

"Yeah, that and I don't want her to break."

"But she's your very favorite correct?"

"Yes, whenever I'm sad, she makes me think of my mom and I'm not so sad anymore."

Lisbon nodded. "Sometimes people are like that too."

Emma looked up at her confused.

"Sometimes, when we think that someone doesn't care for us because they're not around very much it's only because they love that other person so much that they don't want him or her to get hurt."

"But I'm not…f… fragile." She managed the word this time around.

"Oh sweetie, you may not think so but you're very fragile and very special. When you're here with your grandparents, your safe like Penny is on that shelf. There's too many bad people where Jane and I work. It scares us to think that you could get hurt."

"Does that mean I'm Trick's favorite?"

Lisbon smiled. "Oh, I'm sure you are honey." Out of those among the living, Lisbon thought to herself.

Emma looked down at her doll. "But I made Trick sad. I'm probably not his favorite anymore."

"It just makes him sad that you don't think he loves you."

"But I do love Trick. I didn't mean what I said."

"I know that sweetie and I'm sure you could fix that with a big Emma hug."

In a flash, Emma sprinted out of the room. Lisbon followed but not at the same speed. Downstairs, she found Emma standing alone in the living room, no sign of Jane.

"Trick?" Emma called out.

When she got no answer, she ran to the front door and called again outside.

Mrs. Brooks heard the ruckus and came in from the kitchen. "What's all the yelling about?"

"Where's Trick?" The girl asked.

"He was just here but said he was going for a walk. I hope he comes back soon. Dinner's almost ready. Is everything alright?"

"I'm sure Jane just needed some fresh air." Lisbon offered. "I'll go see if I can find him. How many minutes until the food is done?"

"I'm just waiting on the roast which should be done in another twenty minutes. I'll have George carve it and then we'll be set to eat."

She found him near the end of the Brooks' block, sitting on a large rock.

"Are you trying to catch pneumonia?" Lisbon asked the man clad only in his signature suit. Thankfully, she had spotted Jane's pea coat near the front door and had taken it with her.

He shrugged. "Guess I forgot where I was for a second there."

Lisbon walked closer, draping the Jacket on the man's quaking shoulders, trying unsuccessfully to hide the shivering in the frigid temperatures.

"Thanks." He said, wrapping the wool material around himself.

Lisbon leaned against the rock, close enough to offer support without invading Jane's personal space.

"You wanna talk about it?"

Jane shook his head. "There's not really anything to talk about."

She decided not to let him brush off the conversation. "Kid's say things without thinking Jane. Emma didn't mean it."

"I know that Lisbon. I was a parent once as hard as that is to believe."

Great, now look what I've done, Lisbon thought.

"It's not," she said taking a step forward and placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. "It's not hard to see you as a father Jane. The way you are with Emma…" Lisbon stopped, wondering if she should continue. It was the truth though, and someone needed to speak it.

"I have no doubt in my mind you were a wonderful father. "

Jane sniffed and Lisbon wondered if it was from the cold or because of the thoughts that she could only imagine must be flashing through her friend's mind.

"None of that changes the fact that I can't be the person Emma wants and probably needs in her life. Not with Red John out there. I wish…" He stopped, sighed, and looked down at his hands which were balled into fists in his lap. Even here, thousands of miles away from California and the serial killer still managed to make life miserable for the consultant.

"I know Jane." Lisbon said, grabbing one of his balled fists. She managed to pry open the man's fingers and intertwine them with her own. His hand was ice cold, so without thinking, she began rubbing it between both of her own warmer hands.

"I'm pretty sure Emma understands too. She may not know everything but she's a smart little girl and she loves you." Lisbon knew it wasn't enough, but it had to be for today anyway. She hoped someday Jane would be free from this heavy bourdon he carried with him at all times. She dared imagine him buying his own house in a neighborhood not too different from the one they were in, performing magic tricks for the neighborhood children simply for the pleasure of seeing the smiles on their faces. It was the kind of thing she pondered often, even more since they had met Emma.

Jane reluctantly pried his hands from Lisbon's and stood. He brushed off his pants and then turned to Lisbon who was still half leaning, half sitting against the rock.

"Thank you." He said, as he gathered her in a hug. It was in times like this when he realized, that no matter what heartaches and challenges came his way, he still had this one ray of light that refused to let his soul be enveloped completely in darkness.

Lisbon returned the hug and simply enjoyed the moment until Jane pulled away. He surprised her though, by gathering her hand again in his and easing her back down the street towards the house.

When they reached the brooks driveway, both Jane and Lisbon noticed the little face that watched them through the front window of the house. The door flew open as they reached the walkway and Emma came flying out with a piece of paper in her small hands, flapping in the breeze as she ran. She crashed into Jane, hugging him around the knees.

"I'm sorry Trick."

He bent down and lifted Emma off the ground. He clutched her to his chest and she gave him a big wet smooch on the cheek.

"I love you Trick. You're my favorite too."

Jane smirked and glanced at Lisbon, confused.

"I'll explain later." She whispered into his ear.

"I colored this for you Trick." Emma sad, waving the colored paper in front of Jane's face.

He took the paper with his free hand and looked at Emma's latest masterpiece. Jane could make out the Christmas tree in the left hand corner, a green triangle covered in colorful circles.

"You'll have to help me out Em. Tell me who the people are, he said pointing to the different stick figures on the page."

"That's gram wearing her apron and gramps in his chair. Trick that's you." Again, Jane was depicted with curly Shirley Temple hair. "Tree is there," to Jane's right, "And me." Emma was right in between the two of them.

There were some jumbled letters, or what Jane assumed were letters on the top of the page. "What does this say Em?"

She drew her finger across the page. "It says 'My Family' cuz we all love each other right Tree?"

Lisbon had to concentrate to keep her emotions in check. "You're exactly right."

Jane gave Emma another squeeze, not yet able to speak with the warmth and gratitude he was feeling for the little girl in his arms.

The spell was broken when Jane's stomach groaned audibly. "Whaddya say we go eat? I can smell something amazing even from out here."

"Mmm food." Emma agreed and the three of them made their way inside for Christmas dinner.

TBC