**I'm not sure how much I like this chapter. I might change it later, but for now this is it.**

Finn

He had promised to write his mother and Rachel as soon as he arrived, but it was so hectic around here that he didn't have the time. He had arrived last week and from the time he stepped off the plane it was like he was going non-stop. It wasn't like he was complaining, he loved it. He felt like he was actually doing something worthwhile.

The guys in his unit were pretty cool. Some of them reminded him of his friends back home which was nice. One guy in particular reminded him of Puck. He was crude, obnoxious, and a total player. There wasn't a girl on base that he hadn't hit on and he had already slept with several of them. The familiarity was nice because it made him miss home a little less, but there were two things that nothing would fill the void for, Rachel and his mom.

When he finally had some time, he sat down and pulled out a notebook and pen. He was never really good with words, but writing was the only real communication he would have with his friends and family back home. He thought about what he wanted to say for a few minutes before finally putting pen to paper.

Dear Mom,

I'm sorry I didn't write sooner, but this is the first chance I've had to really sit down. You would not believe how hot it is here! You get used to it I guess, but I miss Ohio. I've met some really cool guys. They've really helped me fit in which is great. I miss you guys. It's a little weird being on my own. Okay, so I'm not really on my own, I'm with a bunch of other dudes, but you know what I mean.

Anyways, we're heading out the day after tomorrow to help secure a village. I'm gonna be walking through the dessert with fifty pounds of gear on my back, which will suck, but it's a pretty awesome workout. I can't pronounce the name of the town we're going to, but then again I can't pronounce the name of most stuff here.

Well, that's all I have to report for now. I love you guys and tell everyone I said hi. I will try to write again soon.

Love,

Finn

He read through his letter to his mother and nodded. It wasn't much, but then again he didn't have much to say. She would probably just be happy with the fact that she got a letter at all. He wasn't exactly known for his writing skills. He folded up the paper and placed it into an envelope. Now it was time for his next letter. This one might be a little harder.

My dearest Rachel,

I've been thinking a lot about the last time I saw you. You made me so happy that day. I never wanted to leave you, but I just love you so much and I want the best for you. I've been dreaming of our future together ever since you told me you wanted to marry me and have children. I want the same things, but it will have to wait until I come home.

I was listening to a song the other day that reminded me of us. It was called "I Swear This Time I Mean It" by Mayday Parade. I've never really felt like I was good enough for you Rach. I always thought that you deserved better, and when I didn't get my football scholarship or get into that acting school it made that feeling worse.

I don't want to lose you and I am going to do everything in my power to make things work between us. I know you said that you would wait, but I also know that things can change. I will never blame you if you chose someone else to share your life with. You deserve the best Rachel and I want to be that for you. I miss you so much and I love you more than you will ever truly know. I will make myself a man worthy of you.

Yours Always,

Finn

After re-reading his letter to Rachel he considered throwing it out. It seemed so weak to admit that he didn't think he was good enough, but it was the truth. Rachel was so talented, and had all these big dreams for her life. She was the one that inspired him to do better and try for his dreams. When they didn't work out he was devastated. He felt like Rachel's faith in him was misplaced.

He was tired of letting people down and feeling like a failure. His whole life he had felt that way. Glee was the first time that he didn't feel like a failure. He was good at something and it had brought him the love of his life. Now, being in Iraq, he felt like he was finally becoming a man. He had a long way to go, but he was willing to do whatever it takes to be the man Rachel deserves.

He lay down on his bed with his arm curled under his head and thought about Rachel. Lately, his thoughts have been leading him back to their almost wedding. She had looked so beautiful in her white dress. He imagined what it would be like to see her walking down an aisle with their friends and family flanking her, her million watt smile beaming at him from behind a veil. It was this dream that had him falling asleep with a huge smile on his face.

Nearly two weeks later Finn received a letter from his mom. He would have cried if it weren't for the fact that he was surrounded by the rest of the guys from his unit. He never wanted his mom to feel guilty or to worry about him. Next to Rachel, she was the greatest person in the world. He was a little curious as to why Rachel would need his support. His question was answered a few days later when he received a letter from her.

Dear Finn,

I love you. Before I said anything else I wanted you to know that and have it fresh in your mind. I have some news for you and it's good. At least I think it's good. My dad's and Burt weren't too thrilled with it at first, but your mom seemed to think it was good. It involves me deferring my acceptance to NYADA, which I know you were trying to avoid, but it's something that needs to be done.

I'm pregnant Finn. I was hoping to tell you sooner, but you left before I could talk to you. I know we didn't plan for this, but it happened and I couldn't be happier that it did. Kurt has offered to move to New York and help me with everything, so he's going to move into my room in the apartment until we can hopefully find a bigger place. I hope that's okay with you. He's your brother and he said that he wanted to be here for me since you can't.

I know you may be worried about my dreams, but I'm not going to give them up. I am simply changing them a little. This is what I have wanted ever since I met you. I want to have a family with you and I want you forever, but if you aren't ready for this I will understand. I truly believe in my heart that you will be excited, but I have also been told to prepare for the worst. I love you Finn and I can't wait to hear from you.

Love You Always,

Rachel

P.S. I just got your letter today and luckily I read it before I sent this out. I'm glad that you are thinking about us having a family, because we are. It makes me feel so much better about all of this and you can forget all of the negative things I said. I can't wait until I can see you again. By the way, do you have any clues as to when that will be?