The plan was to get rip roaring drunk. That wasn't working out too well for Chuck. Instead the more he drank the angrier he got. He was sitting on his bed with a bottle of scotch in his hand and a snifter in the other. Glass after glass of scotch went smoothly down his stomach until he drained the bottle. He got up and went to his liquor cabinet and got a bottle of brandy out. He held the bottle to him but did not open it or pour himself a drink.

Blair. Just the thought of her name right now sent rage through him. He had told her he needed her in his life and that he wasn't Chuck Bass without her and she still left. He had gotten played again by her. He had been a fool for love once and it looked like he was going down the same road again. This time he would stop himself before it was too late.

He was pissed and angry, but most of all he was just hurt. Hurt that she had left again. Hurt that he still fucking cared about her. Hurt that her absence created a huge hole in his life and his heart. Thinking about her pained him and he pushed all thoughts of Blair out.

He got up and stumbled across the plush floors of the bedroom. In his drunken stupor he heard the ding of the elevator. He knew it would be Serena but he was in no mood for her company. He wanted to see no one and it would be that way for a long time.

Serena's heels clicked on the floor as she softly called out his name.

"In here," he murmured quietly and found that he needed her comfort right now. He needed someone he could trust and who better than his sister.

A moment later she was beside him. Serena tried to take the bottle of brandy out of his hands but he clutched it tightly to him as though it were a lifeline.

"Chuck," Serena whispered his name and sat down beside him. "Give me the bottle."

"I need it."

"Don't you think you've drank enough already?"

"No," he said very quietly. "I could never drink enough to erase all this pain." He glanced up at his sister and the sympathetic glance she was giving him made him want to throw the glass he was holding and watch it shatter into a million pieces. She pitied him and he hated it.

"Give me the bottle." She repeated it but sternly this time.

Chuck finally relented and handed it over to her.

"Blair…" she started but stopped when she saw the grimace that must have crossed his face. "She called me from Paris, Chuck. She's a mess. I think she regrets leaving already."

"Does it look like I give a fuck, Serena? She made her choice."

"Yes it looks like you give a fuck. Why else would you slowly be drinking yourself to death?"

A growl escaped from somewhere deep inside his chest. Damn her! He didn't know if he was cursing Blair or Serena at the moment, but he thought it was probably both.

"We need to bring her back home, Chuck."

He scoffed. "You think I'm the man for that job?"

"You're the only person that has ever been able to get through to her." Serena placed a consoling hand on Chuck's arm before continuing. "I know you're hurting but she is too. She's never stopped loving you and I know she's done a horrible job of showing it but she's so in love with you that she left her home to try and make it more peaceful for you."

"Don't Serena. She left for herself. She left because it's easier for her not to deal with her mistakes"

"Don't you see? She left to help you heal, Chuck. She knows how much pain her past actions have caused you and that seeing her is a reminder of every scar she's inflicted upon you. She left so you could be whole again. I don't agree with her but she thinks it's the right thing to do for you. Deep down she believes that you hate her even if you don't vocalize it because she hates herself. You might not have healed from it but neither has she. She's been carrying around so much guilt for years and it's eating away at her. There's something that Blair doesn't realize though."

His sister's words were starting to get through to him a little bit. What she said made sense but at the same damn time it sounded like bullshit to him even though he knew it wasn't and that was just the anger talking to him. "What's that?"

"Blair doesn't know that you love her as much as she loves you, if not more."

Chuck's dark eyes slid up to Serena's but he said nothing.

"Your non-answer was answer enough."

"What is it that you want me to do?"

"Give her a push in the right direction." When Serena saw that he was about to argue she held up a hand to stall him. "If you can't do it for yourself then do it for your daughter. Be vocal with your feelings for Blair so you can both start over and be a family with Meg."

Chuck stood suddenly and drew Serena up with him. He put his arms around her waist and laid his head on her chest. Her arms went around his neck and she hugged him while silent tears fell down his face. She stroked his back until his tears settled and he regained control of himself. Slightly embarrassed by his outburst of emotion he moved away from her and spoke. "Thank you. I appreciate everything. I'll think about everything you said."

She smiled and nodded. "Never thank me. I know you'll do the right thing for everyone."

She asked if he wanted her to stay but he declined. Once his sister left he went into the bathroom and turned on the faucets to start a shower. When the water was steaming hot he got inside and let it wash over him as he contemplated everything that she had mentioned.

There wasn't much more pain he could take when it came to Blair. If he did go and try to bring her home and she didn't want to come he would have to be done with her for good. Forever. He couldn't keep caring and being disappointed. It was killing him inside but Blair not being here was killing him too. He wanted to bring her home so Meg would have both her parents in the same city. He needed them to be a family for her sake. She deserved that and he would give his daughter anything she wanted.

His feelings for Blair were confusing to say the least. Sometimes he hated her and others he knew he couldn't live without her. There was a fine line between love and hate, and fortunately for both of them he could never learn to hate her even when she deserved it. He needed her like he needed his next breath. In the end when he made his decision he wasn't thinking of his daughter but of himself this time.

He would have to bring his Waldorf home once and for all and this time he would not be taking no for an answer.

A/N: I've decided to post these in shorter chapters so I can update more frequently. I know I've had this story on the shelf for almost four years but if you're reading this, please let me know what you thought. This story will be wrapped up in four or five chapters and they are all planned out so no more waiting. Thank you as always for reading!