HAPPY BIRTHDAY MEGAN! So I decided to do something special for you since this is technically your first birthday that I've been friends with you so, with a lot of help from some friends, we wrote you a bunch of mini fics to one shots to ficlets on a whole range of your favorite Once characters. Have an absolutely fantastic, amazing, awesome, hilarious magical birthday you lovely lady. You absolutely deserve it you Emma Swan you ;) Hope you like them!

5. In the enchanted forest, everyone's personalities are much more docile (kindave like in the curse) but when they're cursed they become bad ass.

Written by: Lisa

"Please?"

Charming sighed and rolled his eyes, striding ahead of his wife to hide his smile.

"No!" He said, his tone of seriousness still holding. Snow cam bounding after him, her robes whipping about in the wind. The royal guards brought Charming's horse from the stables.

"I told you, it's just not possible. The castle's already going to be overflowing with guests from faraway lands; we can't invite Dreamy's entire hatchling kin!"

Snow threw her arms up to the heavens and sighed as Charming fitted his boots into the stirrups and swung into the saddle, the horse snorting and shaking its great head in the bright morning light.

"We'll discuss this when I come back from hunting, all right?" Charming said, his voice softer and kind. Snow knew she'd lost even as she went up on her toes to snatch a kiss, and watched him gallop off to join the rest of the hunting party.

"Please, Red! Stay put, I'm begging you!" Granny pleaded, the exasperation overflowing from her tone of voice.

"I can't just stay here, Granny," Red told her as he tied her hood around her shoulders excitedly, "The festival's supposed to be beautiful! They've got all these lights, and things to buy, and delicious exotic foods, and there are performers-"

"Those boys at the pub embellished it," Granny cut in, curling her lip up in distaste, "There's nothing special about it."

"Well, I want to see it for myself, and you can't stop me!" Red told her, gathering up her basket and leaving before Granny could get a word in edgewise.

The older woman wished she had the ability to say no to Red.

"…Never in my life! Stand up straight, darling, it's unbecoming. As I was saying, I told her I'd never known such insolence! Where were you raised, I said, a pigsty? Chin up, dear. And then she had the gall to reply, no ma'am, just by people with souls."

"What did you do to her?"

"Why, I killed her, of course! Really, Regina, you're a mess. Come now, we're going to practice your posture right now. Come along, dear."

"Yes, mother."

Mary Margaret knew she was being followed.

At first she hadn't realized, lost in her own imagination. But now she heard it, the near silent footfalls of someone behind her. Heavy set, probably male, tall, strong. She'd gone down a few alleys and around the other way without quickening her strider despite her rising fear, and sure enough, he'd followed every step of the way.

Now she was frantically trying to figure out how to lose him.

Then the crunch on gravel brought her out of her panicked thoughts.

He was inching closer.

Mary Margaret felt her eyes go wide and could barely hear him over her pulse thrumming loudly in her skull. She went stalk still as he approached.

Then she whirled around.

Mary Margaret didn't so much as wince as she let the pepper spray loose, right in his face.

She dialed 911 as she exited the alley onto the nearest intersection, the man's agonized screams making it hard for her to hear the call director's voice.

She couldn't help but laugh. It was just too funny, to be honest. Who were these people kidding? That wasn't anywhere near how you held a rifle.

"You guys are idiots," Ruby told the men as they attempted to load the guns. The light was streaming through the leaves in the forest, shining brightly along the elegant metal barrel.

The men looked up, and let out loud, raucous laughs upon seeing Ruby with her arms crossed. She didn't let it bother her, she just smiled in a condescending, 'I'm smarter then you could ever hope to be' way.

"Yeah? Why's that, cutie-pie? You get lost in the wood or something?" One of them men said, his tone rude and mocking. The other men chuckled in approval. Ruby threw her hair over her shoulder and held out a hand.

"Let me show you how it's done," she offered."

The men laughed again, but after seeing that she was serious, he handed her the rifle.

Ruby made her way into the clearing and faced the tree they'd been shooting at, the bark blasted and the wood mottled with bullets. To took a deep breath, assumed the proper stance, flicked off the safety, lined up the sights…

The bullets were fired off in rapid succession, every one hitting the spray-painted bulls eye dead on.

The men weren't laughing as Ruby flicked on the safety and handed the man his rifle back.

"Don't lock your joints, else you get one hell of a recoil, you tree-killing bastard," she told them in her sweetest tone of voice. They were very quiet as she gathered the berries in her basket and went on her way.

"I said hands up! Hands up or I shoot the little brat!"

"Mom! Help!"

"Shut up, you piece of shit!"

Regina wasn't thinking straight.

She just kept blinking at the gun. The gun this masked woman was holding to her son's head. It didn't make any sense. It was like having two completely different pieces of fabric and hacking them together. Cotton on vinyl. Silk on leather.

It didn't make any sense.

She had the paperweight from her desk in her had. She couldn't put her hands up, because then he would see, and-

Henry looked so scared, oh God.

She doesn't remember lunging. She doesn't remember beating the robber bloody. She doesn't remember Henry pulling her off the corpse, in hysterics, begging her to stop. She doesn't remember clawing at the woman's face with her nails. She doesn't remember screaming.

All she remembers is holding Henry close, listening to the beautiful metronome of his heart.