After she had been cleared to go back to work days seemed to slip by. The mission was starting to recede back into her memory; only one thing was bothering her. She hadn't seen Spock since they had come aboard. Even in the labs it seemed Spock had changed his schedule since she never saw him anymore. When two weeks passed she hadn't even been called on an away mission. Serena finally decided to put her foot down and confront McCoy on this issue and found out that he had been going on the away missions the past two weeks. When she asked if he thought she was unfit to do her job he quickly denied it, slightly fearing her wrath which was starting to spark up, and told her she would have to go take that up with command. It was then that she knew just who to talk to.

Serena nearly stormed through the corridors but let the time calm her some so that she could logically approach the situation instead of immediately going on the attack. She asked the computer where Spock was and found he was in his quarters. There was no way the Vulcan would be able to sneak out of this one. If he wanted to get onto her for her actions during the escape then he would do that to her face instead of giving her the cold shoulder and keeping her from her job. Serena came up on the door to his quarters and she took a deep breath before jabbing her finger on the sensor pad.

Spock called out for her to enter and she stepped into the room. Half of it was sparse, hardly any aesthetic touches and it was obvious that everything had its place and everything had its purpose. The other half had a red curtain in it was what looked to be a sculpture of sorts as well as other such artifacts. Spock was at a desk with his back turned to her looking to be in the middle of something on the console. Serena stood there taking in Spock's presence while she waited for him to turn around. She hadn't realized it before but she had missed Spock. In the cell she had relied on him for comfort. His strength, even when losing control, had lent her the strength to go on. A part of her felt utterly alone when he had been gone and she now felt as though she had gained back something of herself that she had lost.

When Spock turned and his demeanor stiffened she stiffened as well unconsciously. That wasn't why she was here; she had to remind herself that she had to get her answers. "Lieutenant Moss." Spock said his voice devoid as ever. That felt like a punch to the gut. "I thought we were past that Spock." Serena said simply standing there in front of him. Spock did not respond to that but instead asked "What is it that you need?" She should've known he would be so formal but that didn't seem to tame the spark of anger that was threatening to catch fire. "I want to know why you are avoiding me and why you have taken me off the list for away assignments." Serena said her tone almost reflecting the emotionless tone Spock used, a silent warning of what laid beneath that calm. Spock stood up and put his hands behind his back. "I have not been avoiding you or-" Serena held up a finger in one quick movement that immediately silenced him. "Before you lie to me or try to talk around a truth as you like to do know that I very well might slap you. You are interfering with my job and you are avoiding me. You might not be conscious of it but you have changed your entire schedule so that I will not accidentally bump into you. Hell Spock you even had McCoy come do your physical in your quarters!" Serena snapped. Spock looked to be debating and Serena thought that she just might have to smack him if he said anything along the lines of 'attacking a commanding officer is against Federation law.' Luckily he didn't say that but instead his shoulders slouched a little and he looked away. "I find that I cannot be around you anymore." Spock paused before he looked back at her as he finished with, "I have no attention of working with you again."

Ok. Had him calling her by her official title been a punch to the gut or was this? Maybe this was what it was like to feel like you were stabbed in the back. Serena just stood there, trying to keep her face from showing the turmoil rolling in her stomach. She took a step towards him and he looked ready to take a step back. She ignored this and continued moving forward.

"Am I a poor medic?" she asked.

"No. I-"

"Did I cause our mission to fail?" Serena interrupted taking another step forward.

"You know you didn't-"

"What about the security officers? Did I kill them?"

"Serena you know I didn't-"
"Now you use my first name!" Serena said throwing her hands up in the air. When they came down she poked Spock in the chest. "If I did not do anything wrong in our mission why are you punishing me and keeping me from not only my friend but from my job?"

Something played behind the vale that was Spock's eyes. "Because I cannot control myself when I am around you." Spock stated, the statement almost strained as if he had not wanted to say it. Serena just looked at him, confused by what he had said. "What does that mean?" she finally asked almost snappy. "How am I-" She didn't have a chance to finish as she suddenly felt the wall pressing into her back, Spock's hands on her shoulders. Her stomach flipped as she audibly gasped. "I feel when I'm around you." Spock said, his eyes suddenly displaying the turmoil roiling in there. "When I look at you I want to yell at you for what you did during the escape. I want to keep you from ever going through something like that again. I want to make you submit to me and promise you'll never be in danger ever again." Serena was stunned as she stared into the face of a Vulcan that was struggling with so many emotions at once. "I don't understand Spock. Why would you-why would I?" she stammered her mind not keeping up. She felt like her brain was fried, static interrupting brainwaves as all she could feel was the heat of his body warmth and the intense gaze of his dark eyes. "I'm drowning in them." She thought unable to surface. Before she was able to get out a coherent thought her lips were suddenly covered by his. Everything in her immediately imploded and then stopped. His lips, his taste; she was lost in it. Now truly and utterly drowning in it, his hard body pressed into hers. A whimper sounded from her as she was both afraid and aroused by this sudden onslaught of emotion and her body's fierce reaction.

Spock immediately pulled back at the sound and moved away from her, turning his back to her as he ran a hand through his perfectly cut hair. Serena was left there suddenly needing the wall to keep her up as a shiver racked through her from the absence of his heat. Her mind slowly began to work again and her eyes found the agitated Vulcan. "Spock." She finally said standing up and reaching out for him. He flinched away from her when his eyes noticed her action. That effectively froze her.

Spock straightened and she saw as she slowly lost the man that had just held her in his arms. "Forgive me that will never happen again." Serena moved her hand to her chest, keeping herself from grabbing him. "Spock…it is-" "Serena..." her name was soft on his lips and it effectively stopped her. Spock turned to her as his hands clasped behind his back. "All of this is illogical and against Vulcan ways. I will regain composure and pursue the logic of Surak. I will endeavor to not falter from the path of logic again. Forgive me for my actions; I will no longer hinder your duty." With that Spock left without giving her a chance to respond. Serena found herself alone in Spock's quarters as her mind tried to process what had just happened. Answers on what to do did not come to her. She still didn't even know what to think about Spock's actions or her own.

When she made it to her own quarters she just sat there thinking. Spock was half human and it had plagued him his whole life. He had always endeavored to be purely Vulcan. Spock had mentioned some of the bullying he had been put through and even though he spoke of it off hand like it didn't matter she knew it must've been hard for him. Now his control and the very essence of being Vulcan were being put to the test and Spock was fighting it. To humans this dilemma was easily fixed. Serena for example had realized just how deeply she cared for Spock and if he had been a human she would've pursued him. Instead she sat in her quarters in front of her console the very logic of Vulcan fully against emotions such as lust, anger, and love. Even the scholars assumed mates were purely chosen for birthing offspring based off of logic. Parents never claimed any emotions towards their children simply that their children are a part of them. Serena couldn't understand it but what she could understand was that Spock had always been an outsider. He had gained so much by joining Starfleet and making his name known as one of the best First Officers of the fleet. Vulcans were even noticing him as not a Halfling but as a prodigy of Vulcan who was becoming the pride of their planet. What would happen if he were succumb to human emotions and allowed himself to want for her? As he had said he had wanted to protect her and as he had showed her he had wanted to touch her. Would that set him back with his success with his own kind? Would she want to be a hindrance to him? It seemed that he did not want the emotions he felt. He felt guilt for failing to control his emotions. She had seen pain in his eyes. Serena covered her own as if she could forget it. She did not want to see that again yet she did want to feel his touch again. She couldn't help it, that taste of what could've been had addicted her. But what was worse, she wanted his presence again. She could handle not feeling his fingertips over her skin again, or his body pressing into hers. But losing him all together? She didn't know if she could handle that.

Serena finally came upon the only decision she thought she could. If she pressed her need for his touch she could lose him. He detested himself when he was with her in that way and she didn't want to feel guilty for causing it and hoping for more. If he needed space and needed to feel like they could work professionally then that was what she would have to do. She couldn't lose him as a friend that thought hurt almost worse than losing what could have been. Spock did not want her in the way she wanted him at least not consciously. She would just have to wait to see what he decided, if he decided she was worth the excess emotions or if she was better off as just a coworker. Serena felt like someone was squeezing her stomach at the decision but she had set her mind. If Spock would still work with her she would not bring up tonight and she would not push it. She would not lie and if he asked how she felt she would tell the truth but she was not going to go a demand he accepted the human side of himself. It would all be up to Spock which meant that she would have to be patient.