I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist or any of the characters

Chapter 2

"Fullmetal!"

Edward heard someone calling him far away through the fog of sleep and somehow he knew it didn't bode well for him. The voice was very angry.

"Fullmetal!"

The voice was much closer this time. But who was it?

Edward opened his eyes half way. It was Roy. Roy Mustang. The Colonel Bastard. He saw the whiskers he'd drawn and he smiled.

The Kitty Colonel Bastard.

Roy was standing there his hair wet and disheveled, a towel wrapped around his waist. He pointed at the cat whiskers drawn on his face angrily and shouted, "You think this is funny!? It doesn't come off! I have a date tonight!"

Ed sat up awkwardly. "It's OK," he said slurring his words slightly. "Girls like kitties."

Mustang stood there for a moment just looking at Ed. "Edward, what's wrong with you?" he asked.

Ed shook his head. "Nothing."

Roy looked at him suspiciously. "Fullmetal, have you been drinking?" he asked.

"Oh, that!" Ed said. "I just finished yours." He pointed to the empty glass on the table. "It wasn't very good though." he added making a face.

Mustang looked at the glass and then at the half-asleep teen in front of him rubbing his face. He'd poured himself a rather generous portion but couldn't remember how much he'd had before he'd fallen asleep. He sighed. The damage was done. "Well go and make us some supper. There should be some instant noodles in the cupboard. I guess I won't be going out after all."

"Okay," agreed Edward.

Roy watched him head off to the kitchen yawning and stretching before he returned to the bathroom to finish drying off. He supposed he could cut Edward some slack he'd been working pretty hard all day.

The comment he'd made to Edward the day before at the office about coming to his house to live and being his slave had been a joke. It had been a complete surprise that that the brat shown up with his suitcase in hand. Really Edward took everything so seriously!

Still Roy was never one to let opportunity pass him by. He thought he'd have Ed do a few things that needed doing around the place, spend the night and send him home in the morning. No harm done or so he'd thought as he examined the whiskers on his face.

He tried washing his face a few more times but it really didn't do any good so he put on a robe and pajama bottoms. Then he went and called to cancel his date, pretending to be deathly ill. Amelia offered to come over and nurse him back to health but he finally got out of it by telling her one of his subordinates was already there looking after him, made his apologies and hung up.

Roy had really been looking forward to this date. He had finally been able to get reservations at a new restaurant where the food was supposed to be superb. Everyone was raving about it and now he had to postpone it until who knew when and eat ramen. He sighed again and called the restaurant to cancel the reservations and then headed into the kitchen.

Ed was at the sink doing dishes. The guy was a clean freak. Roy ignored him and sat down at the table where a bowl had been set out for him. He looked into it. Inside there were about three noodles swimming in lukewarm broth.

"What is this supposed to be?" Roy asked.

"Supper," Ed answered not bothering to turn around.

"I need more than this! Make some more!" Mustang demanded getting pissed off.

"There is no more," Ed stated simply.

"What do you mean no more? There had to be about ten packs of ramen in the pantry!" Roy insisted.

Ed finally turned to face him. "Eight! There were eight."

"Ok then! Eight! Make me a couple more."

"I ate them."

"You ate them?! Didn't it occur to you that I might like something to eat? It looks like you ate most of this one too!" Roy exclaimed indicating the bowl in front of him.

He realized it was the truth when Ed turned red, and started shouting at him "I was hungry, Okay?! Cleaning up after a pig like you all day is hard work!"

Mustang could feel his anger rising. Pig like him?! If it wasn't for this arrogant brat he would be going out with a beautiful woman for a decent meal!

"I didn't just lie around drinking, sleeping and playing dress-up!" Ed continued ranting.

Mustang stood up suddenly glowering. Ed saw the look on his face and realized he may have gone too far. But Roy just turned and strode angrily out of the room. Ed went back to finishing the dishes. He could hear his superior talking on the phone again. It seemed to be a rather long call but Ed couldn't make out who he was talking to.

Even after Mustang got off the phone he didn't come back so Ed finished off his ramen and cleaned up the dishes. There was no point in letting food go to waste after all.

When Ed was done that he went looking to see where Mustang had gotten to. He was surprised to find him in the den working. He was calmly going through all of the papers that were spread out there. Ed stood there amazed - he couldn't remember the last time Roy had done his job without actually being forced to. It was definitely suspicious.

Ed approached him cautiously. "You didn't want your ramen?" he asked tentatively even though it no longer mattered.

"No, I ordered some take-out. It should be here shortly," Mustang answered without looking up from his work.

"Oh," Ed said wondering if he'd ordered enough for him as well.

He sat down in the chair opposite watching him. For once the bastard actually looked like he was concentrating. Ed studied Mustang's profile. The chiseled chin set in determination, the dark almond eyes bright with intelligence – no wonder so many women chased after him. He had it all. He even had a great build – the broad muscular shoulders showed their definition even under the silky robe. Ed had to admit to himself that if he'd been a girl even he would've been attracted to the bastard.

The only sounds were the scratching of Mustang's pen and the clock ticking on the wall behind him. Ed started getting drowsy again but Roy broke the silence.

"Fullmetal."

Ed looked up to see Roy gazing up at him. "What?"

"I don't mean to be rude but you've been working all day and well…its time you had a shower," Mustang suggested not unkindly.

"Are you saying I stink?" Ed asked.

"To put it bluntly – yes, you stink," Roy admitted.

Ed stood up realizing he did feel pretty grimy. A shower would definitely go along way to making him feel better. "Yeah, okay," he agreed and went to the bathroom.

As Ed started the water running he had to admit that Mustang really was being a decent guy. Sure he'd worked him pretty hard all day but then Ed had gone and ruined his night out and eaten his supper, he seemed pretty forgiving about it. He guessed you never really knew a person until you lived with them.

He heard the doorbell over the sound of water running and he supposed that the food had come. He got into the shower intending to have a quick one so he might scavenge some of the food before it was gone. He started lathering up his hair when he heard the bathroom door open and felt the cool air from the hallway rush in.

"I'm just leaving you some fresh clothes, Fullmetal and taking the old ones," he heard Roy say.

"Okay," Ed agreed. "Save some of that food for me!" he added cheerfully over the running water.

"Yeah," Roy said. "Once you're dressed you can have some!" Then the door closed.

Ed was feeling even more kindly toward Roy as he rinsed his hair. He had really misjudged the guy. Here he'd done some pretty ignorant things to him and he was treating him almost as if they were friends. He started to feel guilty about the cat whiskers and eating his food.

He opened the shower curtains and looked around for a towel. There weren't any. It seemed a bit odd. He thought Roy must have used up all of them when he'd taken his shower. He alchemized himself dry as best he could. The room was pretty steamy so he was damp at best.

Ed combed out his hair but couldn't find his hair tie. He decided to just leave it loose until it dried completely. He looked around for the clothes Roy had brought him and saw a small black pile folded on the vanity top.

He lifted the top article off and blinked in confusion. "What the fuck?!"

It was a dress! A very short dress. He might have thought it was a shirt if the skirt part hadn't been so full and feminine and trimmed in lace! It was low cut to boot. Surely the bastard couldn't be serious?

He looked down at the other items that had been underneath. There was a pair of lacy white panties, a maid's cap, apron, stockings, garter-belt and shoes with four inch heels. At that moment Edward decided there was no one in the world he hated more than Roy Mustang.