It was hard saying goodbye to the girls after the funeral, but deep down, I found myself grateful that for at least one night, I could afford to grieve without having to comfort my two younger sisters. Nearly as soon as we got back to the house, I shrugged out of my wet clothes, slipped on one of Darry's old t-shirts and a pair of my shorts and curled up in the darkest, most remote corner of the house. Greaser stuck to me like glue, never making a single sound, except for soft panting from time to time. I twisted my fingers in his thick fur, tears silently rolling down my cheeks.
Around dinner time, Darry came and told me if I didn't eat, he'd hold me down and force it down my throat. Even though I knew it was an empty threat, I followed him into the kitchen silently, slipping scraps of chicken down to Greaser from time to time, not really feeling all that hungry.
I listened while the rest of the gang tried to make small talk, but no one was really in all that good of a mood. The deaths of two of our own were still fresh in our minds, and now, even though none of them had been very close to Tommy, and even less so with my father, it struck a chord.
After dinner, I found myself digging around for an old rope, so I could go for a walk with Greaser. Normally, Martha would have known right away where to find it, but in the two years since she passed, the house hasn't exactly stayed as organized as it was before. I winded up digging through Soda's closet, when I came across an old photograph, one I hadn't seen in years. I rocked back on my heels, a smile forming on my lips. It was the only professional picture any of us had ever had taken. I remembered the day so clearly.
Michelle was only a few months old, and both Martha and my mom thought it was about time we got a picture of the entire gang, Michelle and all. So all of us, Steve, Soda, Darry, Ponyboy, Two-Bit, Dallas, Johnny, Martha, Darrel, my mom and dad, Mary, Michelle and me, along with Two-Bit's mom, all went down to the park, on a beautiful, sunny Friday afternoon, and had someone snap the picture. I felt tears well in my eyes, before I stuck the picture back where I found it.
The yard's worth of rope I'd been looking for, was shoved between a few pairs of jeans that were way too small for Soda. I pulled it out and looked at it for a moment, before pulling myself to my feet, tying it to Greaser's collar, and making my way out the front door.
"Want any company?" Soda offered, looking up from the cards in his hand. He, Ponyboy and Steve were sitting around the coffee table, playing poker.
"No, but Steve's got an Ace in his shoe," I said flatly as I stepped outside.
It wasn't until I was a few blocks over that I realized it was freezing outside. I was clad in only a pair of jeans and Darry's oversized t-shirt, and as soon as the bitter wind started to blow, I wanted to kick myself for not thinking ahead. I knew it would only lead to a nasty cold, so I decided to walk as quickly as possible, not really wanting to get sick when I had so much to do in the coming days.
Greaser stopped short just a few blocks from the house, growling softly, his ears perked. A blue mustang pulled up, and wouldn't ya know, when the window rolled down, one of the few Socs I actually could stomach was driving.
"You need a lift?" Jacob Smith asked. He had a real gentle look to him and after the rumble about a year ago, he had been nothing but kind to me. I think a lot of it had to do with the fact he was terrified of Darry.
"Sure," I said, sliding in after loading Greaser into the back seat.
"How're you holding up?" he asked softly as he pulled away from the curb. "I heard about what happened." He looked at the sling, his face going slightly pale.
"Alright, all things considered," I sighed. "How's school?" Jacob was Soda's age, but still in high school.
"Alright I guess. Haven't seen Mary around lately, what happened with her?" he asked.
"State decided to step in. I gotta sort it out these next few days," I sighed. "I'm staying here, pull over," I said as we almost passed the Curtis house.
"I figured," he said with a sad smile. "Ya know, if you ever need anything…" he said awkwardly.
"I'll let ya know," I nodded my thanks. "See ya around Jake. Stay outta trouble."
"Will do. Tell the guys I said hey," he said before pulling away. I shook my head, not for the first time wondering why it was just my luck to make peace with a Soc of all people.
"You're back fast," Soda noted as I walked through the door, untying the makeshift leash from Greaser's collar.
"It's freezing outside," I chuckled. "I got a ride."
"I saw that, was that Jake?" Darry asked, coming into the living room.
"Mhm, he says hey," I said with a shrug. I walked into the kitchen and flipped on the burner, rubbing my hands together. Glory, I was freezing. I looked out the window, seeing that the snow had turned to sleet. "Great," I muttered.
"What?" Darry asked, following my gaze.
"If it's already turning to ice, the roads are gonna be hell tomorrow morning," I sighed. I hated walking when the roads were slick. I'd almost been plowed over a few times for that very reason.
"You're going to work tomorrow?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
"I got a three hour shift before I gotta head down to talk to Judith about the girls. I get the keys to the house after that though, so hopefully, if all goes good and well, I'll have the girls back by next week," I said, putting the tea pot on the burner. I went to the cupboard and pulled out one of the few coffee cups that hadn't winded up broken, before turning to the pantry to search for a tea bag. Martha used to insist on a warm cup of tea after being out in the cold to ward off a cold.
"You haven't broken that habit yet, huh?" Darry observed. I turned and smiled at him.
"Some habits are hard to break," I smiled. "Besides, it always worked before."
"True," he laughed, tossing me a tea bag. "We're almost out of tea though."
"I'll swipe a few from the diner tomorrow," I stated, before glancing down at Greaser, who was looking up at me with hungry eyes. "I didn't feed you yet, did I?" I asked, laughing. I pulled out a plate and scooped some dog food onto it before setting it down on the floor.
"That damn dog woke me up last night," Darry laughed, patting his head.
"He's not used to being confined," I stated, looking down at the dog. "I'm glad he's around though. Sometimes, the best listener is the one that can't talk back."
"How are you doing, anyway?" he asked carefully.
"Better, actually. I hate to say it…like, I really hate to say it, but I'm getting used to it, ya know? Losing people?" I saw the look on Darry's face. He hated it that we were all growing so used to the bleak reality of life.
"I know whatcha mean," he sighed, resting a hand on my shoulder. For a whole moment, I almost wanted to wrap my arms around him and pull him in for a hug, but that just wasn't how we were. I'd hug just about anyone, at any time, but with Darry, it was different. Only some of the time did it actually work in that way.
The phone rang suddenly, and I found myself wondering who would be calling at such a late hour. A moment later, Soda was calling my name.
"It's for you."
The last time someone called for me, it was bad news. I took a deep breath and walked into the living room, taking the phone from Soda.
"Hello?"
"Jo-Anna, it's Judith," a familiar voice chirped. "I've got some news for you."
"Good or bad?" I asked instantly.
"Good, actually," she said brightly. "I know it's late, and normally, we wouldn't go about it this way, but the girls won't go to sleep, and given the…well given the circumstances, after speaking it over with the police and the other social workers, we came to a decision that I think would greatly benefit you, the Curtis boys too."
"Really?" I asked, shooting Darry a look. He was watching from the doorway, his face emotionless.
"Really, now why don't you come on down and we'll talk? Bring Darrel with you too, if he's not busy," she said. I could hear the smile in her voice.
"He's not busy," I said with a soft chuckle. "We'll be down in about 20 minutes," I added before hanging up.
"What did you do?" I mouthed, giving Darry a funny look.
"Why?" he asked, his expression changing to one of concern.
"No, don't freak," I said quickly, "It's apparently good news…" I wasn't so sure. It seemed very odd that Judith wanted to see Darry and me both. That's never happened before, even though she, as well as the Curtis' social worker, was aware of the current arrangements, even as far back as after my mother's death. They never seemed to question it, because one way or another, we were keeping each other's family intact.
"What's up?" Soda asked, giving me a funny look.
"I'm not entirely sure. We'll be back, though," I said, tossing Darry his keys. His eyes widened, almost as if he still thought it was not good news. "C'mon, the longer we wait, the more crazy we'll drive ourselves."
We both hurried out of the house, careful not to slide on the slippery stairs.
"Drive slow," I cautioned. Darry was the best driver out of the whole gang, but I knew when he was worried, he drove carelessly, something I was constantly hollering at him about. He, for once, listened, taking it slow, even more aware of the dangerous black ice.
As we walked up the steps to the girls' home, I wasn't sure what I was expecting. Judith was standing outside, a thick jacket pulled tightly around her.
"Well c'mon in," she said brightly. "It's freezing out here."
We followed her in, both exchanging worried glances. We definitely weren't sure what to expect.