~again sorry if this is bad it is now 5 past 1 in the morning but i have ideas in my head and sleep will chase them away ... lets hope they are worth it ...
disclaimer : victorious never was nor never will be mine
chapter 2
beck was running around like a headless chicken when jade and andre arrived at the door of his RV . Andre banged his fist against the metel door till his hand turned red .
" beck answer the door we know your in there "!, andre yelled .
"hold on a sec " , came becks struggling voice from inside.
"beck its freezing out here come on , open the dam door !", jade yelled ,"never mind" .
she reached inside the wheel of the rv and produced a small key , with a quick turn in the keyhole jade and andre went bustling into the RV , but were stopped in their tracks by what they saw .
Beck was stood facing the door covered in talcon powder , and in the corner on the sofa was a pile of balled up yet clean nappys .
"help me , please help me ..." , beck broke down to the floor in tears holding yet another clean nappy .
jade rushed forward and was on her knees hugging beck while his body shook with sobs , andre went over to deal with the baby , he started muttering .
"if Tori... was ... here she ... would ... of been... able ... to do... all of ... this , but i cant ... i just cant , ...p-please help me jade , p-p-please ? ",he gasped for breath as another wave of tears hit his body.
"beck we are all here , and we are all going to help you ok , but you need to pull yourself together for your daughter " , jade said pulling his face to look him directly in the eyes to show she ment what she said .
" im trying , i really am but its so hard , whenever i look at patricia i see tori and it hurts me so much knowing i wont see her beautiful face ever again when i wake up in the morning or when i go to sleep at night ... it kills me everyday that i know my daughter is going to grow up and never hug her mom , she will never have her mom to go to when she needs girlly advice about boys and stuff ... it hurts ... " , no more tears come but his body still shakes .
" i know it hurts now , it will probrebly always hurt but it will get to a point were its bearable and were you can move forward with your life with your daughter and be happy " , jade smiled at him " now why dont you go and lay down , get some rest , we will look after patricia ok ".
" no its fine " , beck say jumping up and moving further away from his bed , he knows he cant sleep , during the day he can find distractions to keep his mind off tori , they dont always work but he has a chance ; when he sleeps he wouldnt be able to defende his mind against the ongoing battle with his thoughts . he wouldnt have a choice in watching the events of that day repeat over and over and over again .
~ i got a bit emotional from writing part of this chapter . please reveiw x :)