A/N: Uhh... what can I say... sorry that it took me nearly two months to update. I'll try to make it up to those who are still reading me. This chapter is a small glimpse of how impossible Steve's situation is with his two best friends.

It looks so much friendlier as a Word doc ^^;

Sketches

~11~

~*You're going to be the death of me*~

"I can't believe it. You two barely know each other for what?-"

"Depends, Steve. From first meeting or how much time we've spent together?"

"Doesn't matter."

"Well then, two days, or half an hour-"

"22 minutes."

"Shut up nerd."

"Sure thing Sergeant Jerk."

"Get the eggshell off your ass first, punk."

"O-kay, so half an hour and you two already made it your mission to make my life miserable."

And the sad thing was that Steve wasn't even exaggerating. It seemed to be the only thing Tony and Bucky was on the same wavelength with and when they grew tired of killing each other – seriously, Steve finally knew why he had never considered becoming a teacher and why he had had enough of babysitting. Tony and Bucky – though separated might as well act like "normal" adults now and then by miracle, but together… They both were de-aged to like five. Eight tops. Just because that was the age when they picked at each other all the time, but also started conspiring against the one overlooking them. Which was Steve.

"Shit, Barnes, how did he break our Enigma-encripted secret so quick?"

"I told you he was smart, you just never listen to me, boasting about you genius. Clearly you are just a lunatic dumbass. So we need another code."

"Definitely."

"Meeting at headquarters in 4?"

"Sssh, Idiot! If we have to look for another HQ I'll strangle you," Tony glared at Bucky then winked. Bucky grinned back and tapped the side of his nose knowingly.

In exact four minutes both of them vanished. And actually managed to keep quiet and not spring at each other for two exact more minutes. Then they just tumbled out of Steve's closet scaring the poor man for life.

Even though Steve was overjoyed that he got back two of his best friends nearly at the same time, it was making just this close to impossible to get his project done. And unfortunately the deadline was nearing at an unforgiving pace. The date already gloated at him circled with red marker in his calendar.

Steve wondered why everyone was gravitating to his small home, when obviously Tony and Bucky both had better apartments. God, he didn't even want to really think about where Tony might live, and definitely why he liked lounging around in the Rogers estate so much. He already knew where Bucky lived, his friend had invited Steve for gatherings and "man-to-man" talks regularly when he was in the mood. On the other hand Bucky called the spacious, well-lit and well-equipped apartment 'home' just a bit more often than Tony (which was actually never). He'd always preferred living with Steve, because it filled him with warmth of the illusion that he had a nice family.

However, the close proximity brought along Bucky's whining about boredom and that Steve wasn't paying attention to him and what was he even doing back in NY when his life had been so much more exciting with his unit. He didn't mean it of course, and Steve knew it very well but Bucky had known him long enough to mercilessly have his manipulative ways with the poor good-hearted blond.

So it was a real relief when his phone went off (repaired and returned the same afternoon when it left in Tony's pocket), interrupting Bucky's actual rant and sending him into a chain of curses over the AC/DC ringtone.

"Hey! Someone let me in, my hand is burning," Tony's cheerful tone cut through to Steve.

"So be it. You can always use the other when lonely."

Steve grunted and shot a glare at his best friend, and Tony just sneered on the other side of the line.

"Sure thing. Hey cupcake, do you think you can devour one and a half extra big extra delicious pizza?"

Bucky was out the room in a second - he had been bitching about being hungry, even though they had just eaten two hours ago, but hey, men. Before Steve could even rise from his chair he heard the muffled voices of wrestling from the corridor then the slam of the door, and Tony came rushing into his room, pushing two huge warm pizza boxes in Steve's lap with "hold them will ya?" wink and just after Bucky slid into the room Tony dodged him and with manic clatter ran to the living room with the third box held high in his hands.

Steve just gaped after the two. Seriously? Grown men? Not even if the world came crushing down.

"Ya don' dare to fuck with me, Stark!"

"Come on Barnes, what is military nowadays?"

"I'll fry your ass!"

"Ya gotta catch me first!"

The yells accelerated in volume and decreased in making any sense and Steve decided it was high time he checked on his kindergardeners when the yelps were replaced by thumps and grunts, and he started to feel worried about Tony's well being. Because - you know – Tony with his big cocky mouth he could never shut and Bucky being a soldier and the temper...

He was more than used to separating the two when Bucky's tolerance reached its end like four years in advance and were at each other's necks, but now he just couldn't decide if he should gasp in horror or laugh hysterically or just turn away and pretend he hadn't seen anything.

Right that moment Bucky was straddling Tony's back, holding the billionaire in a deadly choke hold snarling close to his ear with a manic glint in his bright eyes, while Tony was desperately tapping away, he gave up, he gave up, now air, pretty damn please!

The neighbours definitely didn't like how the boys picked their way of showing affection, because the end of the broom ratted frantically from the other side of the floor.

Bucky let Tony go, who took some deep breaths then just shoved Bucky to the ground and the two went back to killing each other even louder.

The pizza box lay forgotten under the couch.

„Hey, Tony, this is Steve-"

"Oh, hey, sweet cheeks. Sorry. Haven't seen your ID."

Tony's voice sounded strangely muffled and there was some clattering and whirring noise in the background which Steve couldn't really identify.

"Umm, where are you?" he asked hesitantly. Well, it sort of would have been his main question, but now it felt odd. Like a mother checking in on his little, immature kid.

"Under the hood, dismantling my newest car."

So this is why his voice was off. The other question was how they could speak at all, since Steve assumed Tony'd need both of his hands in the process and wouldn't wear a hands-off just in case his long-lost friend called. Especially since Tony's most recent caller was his boss and best friend, Pepper Potts (Steve got slowly but steadily updated on the billionaire – courtesy of Peter). And Tony was the type of guy who would if he could get away with not answering his superior any given time and beyond. Even if he owned the said company. So whatever.

Steve didn't even want to question the newest car part.

"Okay. But do you really have to do that?"

"I want to make her faster. These cars are dull, and have so many mistakes I wouldn't reach the end of the list by morning – Come on, rusty baby, cooperate a bit!"

"If you say so," Steve drew out and waited patiently a few minutes until Tony stopped his growling argument with the engine of his car. "Anyway I called, because we're going out for a beer with Bucky, and I wondered if you wanted to join us?"

"Thanks, baby, but you'll have to survive without my glorious company," Tony answered and Steve could hear the smirk in his voice.

"I'm sure your car would wait for you."

"Oh, no doubt. She can't really go anywhere without her engine. However-"

Tony was interrupted by the unmistakeable sound of something blowing up. On a very nasty way if Steve had to deduce from the sound and Tony's curse.

"Jesus, fuck, Dum-E! What now?" Tony exclaimed and Steve could picture him with his hands on his hips glowering at anything that dared to go off.

There was a chirping and whirring sound that Steve would risk to call– guilty?

"No, no, you won't get away with it! It was my second coffee machine this weekend!"

Long-drawn chirping and shuffling again.

"I swear you ruin one more and I turn you into a wine-rack."

One high-pitched panicked beep.

"I'm being serious. No moving, no disaster! You're hopeless, Dum-E. Shoo! Off to your corner! No- Don't even touch that mess, you'll blow up my whole workshop one day. Off the corner! You're grounded."

Sad, fading chirping.

"Seriously, one would think he's jealous or something."

Steve couldn't withhold it anymore, he burst out laughing. To that Tony let out a yelp of surprise that made Steve double over with laughter even more.

"Sorry, sorry." Steve apologized half-heartedly while clutching at his middle to regain his breath. "Who were you talking to?"

"One idiot of an AI-Bot I have down here," Tony huffed out, and Steve knew he was carding his hands through his hair, making it even messier, and the more he did it the more the stress lifted off his shoulders.

"Dummy."

"Correct. His name is very suitable for him. You met a few of his in-progress compartments. I was working on updating him as much as I could when I was crashing at you. Despite being called an artificial intelligence, well…He's a disaster – Yes, I'm talking about you. Now switch yourself off, Daddy's pissed – A real update is long overdue if you ask me."

Steve could picture the contemplating frown on Tony's brows.

"How long exactly?" Steve was sure Tony could hear the bright smile in his voice. It was so much like you talk to your beloved pet or your annoying kid. To be honest, at first he thought, Tony had a dog and he was talking to it. Not a robot.

"Ever since I made him for the science fair at uni."

Steve couldn't help the fond smile that settled on his lips. So it meant Tony wasn't going to change the poor thing. He was meant to be so – disastrous.

"So back to our subject – you know before my overly-suspiciously-jealous Dum-bot destroyed my precious coffee machine -"

"Yes. So can you come?"

"Still nope, and still sorry. As I was about to say, I'm a few states away. I got fed up with that shitty weather and went for a spin to Malibu."

"You're on the other coast… but you just dropped by yesterday."

"Well, I'm actually living here. I have my house, quite fancy, and rebuilt after I had a minor accident here a few months ago, and I'm only residing at a penthouse in NY when it's really necessary for business. If I could, I wouldn't go back until spring, but I have a harpy of a boss, so I have to drag my ass back there for Monday."

So Tony wasn't even living in New York. They only met because he had a lot of work to do, and as soon as his projects are done, he's going to move away.

Far away from Steve.

The clench of his guts was definitely because he had been eating quite irregularly nowadays.

"Oh. Um. Okay. Maybe- maybe next week?"

"Depends. Are you inviting me on a date?"

Steve was about to miss this part of their conversation. Things never seem to go easy for him. It took Steve a while to get over his coughing fit and ignore the heat crawling down his neck.

"No. Not really. Just, you know. Bucky is the going-out type, and I don't think I can hold up with him so long, and you seemed to be fine not really killing each other, and since he'll surely want to go out to party, I thought maybe you'd come too. I'm not really comfortable with – that."

"Despite the amazing rambling-explanation you threw my way, Captain, this sounds like a date." Why was Tony so calm about making Steve's life miserable? Is it seriously the only kind of friends he got? All teasing and – well, if Tony was serious about it, then it would be an entirely different story, but only this flirting…

Steve shut this thought down in record time.

"If Pepper doesn't throw some gala my way for next Friday, I'm totally in." Tony took mercy on the long silence from Steve's part. "You'll see, you haven't really been on a party until you partied with me."

A/N: Oh hey, it seems like something's going to happen? O.O wow~ But it won't happen until two chapters from now because I'm lazy and impossible... sorry, don't hurt me! I'll try and make it look like as if it's heading somewhere I promise!