THANKS FOR OVER 500 HITS!

Now I know that 500 isn't that much, but it is to me!

AS A SPECIAL THANK YOU, I DREW A PICTURE FOR YOUR VIEWING PLEASURE! JUST GO TO MY PAGE AND THE LINK WILL BE AT THE TOP!

Now…even though this story-could-be was supposed to be a done deal last year, people keep e-mailing me to write more crap. You got me. I'm a sucker for reviews, yet in real life I'm a compliment repellent. Anyhow, I have something you'll really like…to not read. Enjoy…or something.

As you may know, romance can be placed in two solid categories, depending on the content. It could be in the "G" category, where it is safe for all ages above 13 or so to view…and then there is the "X" category, where all the nasty-dirty-filthy-hypnotizing smut that's meant for adults (and sexed- up teens) only. So far, these romantic comedies I have so far weeded out to make my own are in the "G" category. I think today I'm going to try my hand at writing some nasty-dirty-filthy-hypnotizing smut of my own…even though that is way out of my league (yet I look at it…but that's a different story so SHUT UP!)

Inuyasha and Kagome had just spent the day together on a date. They have been dating for a month—no, no short enough—one week, and they felt they we're meant to be…like always. Ah, alas, dear readers! Kagome is getting that…ANIMAL feeling mommy and daddy tend to have, and feels the urge to end the day "The Right Way"…if you know what I mean. The both of them right now are at a restaurant. The two already ate and they just sat awhile as their waitress Kaede returns whit the bill.

"Inuyasha?" Kagome says, as she slowly runs her finger around the rim of her champagne glass. The glass makes that cool sound when you do that.

"Mm?" Inuyasha mumbles with a cream puff jammed in his mouth. Kagome give him a seductive smile.

"I had a great time. Thank you."

"MmmMm" ("I have, too.)

"I think we were meant to be you know. You treat me so nicely and you're such a loving man. Better than that Koga…" (Koga IS in the restaurant…a table away…and he heard that, just to let you know.)

"Well, you're my princess, so I want to treat you like one."

"Awww, Inuyasha…"

Makes me want to throw up.

Kaede comes back with the bill. Over $500 worth of food because they're both pigs. Inuyasha pays and leaves a penny tip and drives Kagome to her house. He walks her to the door, but before he kisses her goodnight and leaves, Kagome grabs his jacket and asks, "Wanna come inside?"

Now boys (and maybe girls), you know what that means when your girl asks you "Wanna come inside?"

You…

Are…

Getting…

LAID! YEAH!

Also, this same message comes in different aliases, such as "Want to come over for my house?", "Would you like to stay the night?", and "Please, stay for coffee." Coffee? Suuuuuurrrrrrrrreeeeeeeee…

BACK TO THE STORY! Kagome take Inuyasha to her bedroom. Not the kitchen. Not bathroom. Definitely not the attic where the rats are, but the bedroom. Her bedroom is the same way on the show, except more mature.

-Sigh- I'm not ready for this part… maybe I'll continue this in another chapter…

No! It must be done! Goodbye (again), internet-virginity! But you all still have to use your imagination!

Kagome starts to give Inuyasha ultra-passionate kisses with the tongue and all that crap. They start shedding clothes little by little till Inuyasha was completely naked and Kagome was just wearing her undies. Then of course those came off, too…right after she pushed him onto her bed and kissed him (this is nasty).

It was getting "hot"—even though it was a perfectly pleasant 65 degrees-Fahrenheit weather inside—Inuyasha did Kagome the honor of removing her underwear. The two turned over so that Inuyasha was on top. It's bad enough with Kagome moaning and what not, but who cares but the person writing this? With his -WHOOPS!-, Inuyasha shoved it right into Kagome's –YOU MUST BE 18 YEARS OR OLDER-, making her scream as if in danger. He kept going in and out, in and out, and she kept moaning and screaming.

Is this a horror movie or an X-rated romantic comedy?

You decide, 'cause I'm done figuring it out.

Okay, now Kagome pushes Inuyasha up, and gets on her knees. She does the most disturbingly nasty thing one cam ever do: she puts his –NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS- in her mouth and starts sucking on it!

And the kiddies go: "EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!"

I have to keep going –sob-…

…What else did they do? –Looks at other X-rated Inuyasha fanfics-…it seems that the lesbian ones are more popular and better written, but this is strictly Inuyasha and Kagome (sorry, boys)…this is tedious…you people sure have time on your hands! Okay, okay. Kagome and Inuyasha start to get that REALLY HEAVY ANIMAL feeling mommy and daddy get as well, and they start doing all these sex moves I never heard, can't describe, and just don't want to mention such as Inuyasha licking Kagome's –TOO MUCH INFORMATION!- and her –CENSORED- really fast. What's strange is that they started to talk as they…go along. Hell, I'm not just talking simple little phrase, here. I'm talking full-fledge conversations, too.

I mean, first they just had normal everyday conversations:

"Oh, Inuyasha…-pant-pant- How ugh is…ahh...your mother?"

"Mmmm…she's…mmm…ahh…fine…but she had to…go-pant- to -huff-…the doctor yesterday."

Or, since they were religious, they would get the Holy Spirit and announce it to each other:

"O JESUS CHRIST, SON OF MARY OF NAZARETH!"

"HALLELUIA!"

"LORD, BLESS ME NOW!"

"JOHN 3:12!"

And then, there's that regular sex talk:

"Oh Kagome…"

"Oh, Inuyashaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"

…Oh brother.

By this time, the both of the have reached their climax, and Kagome's good sheets were destroyed by the stains and tears from doing it "American-style". Thankfully, they are too tired to finish and they go to sleep, naked…on the dirty sheets of Kagome's bed. I must make mention, that after this show, the neighbors couldn't get a wink of sleep because they didn't stop until 12 noon. They were to tired to go to church.

An afterword: These things that I've mentioned are usually put in different orders, if you haven't noticed with everyone else's lemons. Even though I hated this, I'd be happy to write one about Kagome being a dominatrix (my kind of thing XD)! Well now, it's over. Goodbye.