Chapter Three: Bonding
Kenshin struggled through the thoughts that assailed him through the night after his sudden exhaust of power with the priestess. He lay limp, the upper half of his body hoisted on the bed with his legs hanging down its side. Unconscious and sweating, he fought through a fever that was not entirely his own.
Images, thoughts, memories flashed through his dreams. Oddly enough, none of them were his.
Alone in the rain, rats scattering around, the cold wind whipping upon the skin.
Kenshin shivered and tossed himself to a side. His mind then shifted to another dream.
Stones being thrown, cannot stop. Must run, run! A stone hits the knee and caused the stumble. Children leaned over and spat.
Without waking, Kenshin swat his hands at whatever was supposedly leaning over him. But his mind shifted again.
A man following. Panic rises, urging to run. Hair pulled back by the man and then lost of consciousness.
Kenshin growled and rolled off the bed completely, but the images didn't stop there.
Leaning over the pond, ripples flowing away from the teardrops. The pond would not still, a face blurred in the reflection before being pushed into the water and almost drowned.
Kenshin's breath stopped—until a final image blurred into his mind.
The walls, high and intimidating. Sensing the presence, must protect the walls. Looked up.
Kenshin gasped at what he saw.
A crimson vision, eyes winked in amber. PAIN. Numb.
Kenshin tried to breathe but found it too painful. His breath caught in his throat.
A whisper saying "breathe, and open your eyes."
Kenshin obeyed and felt heat rising to his face. He sat up groaning with his hands over his eyes as he finally gained consciousness. He could see the amber flowing out amidst the light that filled his vision. It had barely taken a moment before it disappeared.
Kenshin sat still for a long while. He was at the foot of his bed, on the floor, half up and half sprawled all over. The lights were dimmed on, like he had left them. No one had dared come in. He almost forgot what had happened until he felt something move near him. He looked up at the bed.
Kaoru's eyes moved rapidly beneath her lids, she breathed heavily suffocating from something. Kenshin could see the veins popping out of her neck, yet nothing was strangling her. Then her demeanor suddenly changed. Calm swept over her and tears started to rush down. Still unconscious, she lifted a hand to her right cheek and traced a cross, fingering it lovingly, almost proudly... like he would. Her eyes opened, meeting his intense gaze. Realization passed over their faces.
They had just seen each other's lives.
Kenshin moved to touch her but she jerked away instead.
"Are you alright?" he whispered. The images of her life were still fresh in his mind and was causing a pain that he could not ignore. Her depression was tangible in her thoughts, cold and alone.
"Where are you?" Her voice, firmer than his, reached out in the dim light. Her arms waved around, trying to feel out where he was. Her eyes were shimmering, almost tearful, yet void of awareness. Her hands finally dawned upon his sweaty arm and she grasped him tenderly and pulled him towards her. She wrapped her arms around his sweaty and shivering form and laid his head upon her bare shoulder. She stroke his hair and started to cry on his.
"I lost my parents too," she whispered breakingly into his ear.
Kenshin yielded. He shifted and looped his arms beneath hers, taking her light form in his arms. He was too numb to feel the hot tears that fell from his eyes, wetting Kaoru's neck. He sobbed for the first time since he first entered the world.
Kenshin's body was sprawled all over her nude legs, his head comfortably cradled in the curve of her stomach. His arms were still encircled around her body. Kaoru sighed. She had an idea what time it was, but her lack of sight prevented her from seeing the creeping sunlight on the bedroom floor. Kenshin moaned and jerked again. Kaoru placed her hands on his forehead and he calmed almost suddenly. She shook her head in pity at the man who lay helpless upon her.
She was used to this. She didn't know the extent of her powers would reach into the depths of death itself, but she knew that human consciousness was her expertise. However, this was the first time she had ever traded memories with someone.
She knew hers were bad, she could even recall the memory that Kenshin mumbled about in his sleep. But Kenshin's memories were terrible and she couldn't bare to see them again in her dreams. Images of blood, gore, and the feeling of relish of the kill turned her stomach. She was glad she hasn't had anything to eat since yesterday. She began to stroke Kenshin's hair as he suddenly firmed his embrace. He muttered out in his dreams with a pained voice.
Kaoru needed her eyes to close for a moment—her last conscious thought was: I'm going to regret this.
Looking around the barren ground, reddened with the life of millions of men. The urge to find more and add to the darkened hue. It rose up from the bottom of the gut, giving a delicious sensation as the wind whipped the stench of blood against the face. Pulling out the sword, calloused fingers ran against the blade, wiping the blood off with the index finger. Bringing it close to the face, smelling it and letting it touch the tongue—
Kaoru jerked herself awake, her tears of horror dropped down on Kenshin's face, waking him up. He shook himself from her and sat up. Her expressive eyes showed everything, its sheen somehow reflected to him what she had just relived from his memories. He suddenly had the urge to vomit.
"So you're the queen's daughter?" Kenshin asked in a solemn voice as they walked through the compound gardens.
"Yes. But the King is not my father."
"He's dead as well?"
"Yes. Everybody said I brought a plague on the whole family. I managed to end one of the longest dynasties in Carnelia."
"Truly?"
"No. I don't think I brought the plague, yet everyone is convinced otherwise."
"But you're still alive. How can you not inherit? You're still royal blood."
Kaoru smiled at the question. It was a simple question—one that should have a simple answer. Yet it didn't. Though they had only known each other for a month in what could be called as a hostage-kidnapper relationship, he had started asking about her past with almost no concern for how she might feel about them. His questions were quick and relentless, Kaoru struggled to keep a poker face through them all.
"My blood is stained. That is enough of an excuse," she said calmly yet. Kenshin saw the repressed tears and silently scolded himself for his ignorance. He knew better since that night. The image of Kaoru, persecuted for her features, her circumstances, her unbelongingness. He never knew such things. He knew who he was and was confident in his place.
"Hmm." Kenshin replied after thinking long. He watched her walk. She walked with a cane, her head held high and her face alert. "Well that's all I wanted to ask. Your turn."
"My turn what?" she slowly turned her head, trying to see where he was. Kenshin smiled warmly at her effort.
"Your turn to ask," he said softly. A lump formed in his throat at the fact that he didn't want to answer Kaoru's questions of his past, but fair is fair. Shame slowly leaked through Kenshin's mind. "I know you must be concerned with me," Kenshin tried to explain, his voice drowned in guilt. "It's what was expected of me…" he finished weakly, trying to rationalize what Kaoru saw in his mind.
"Ask about your past?"
"Yes."
"No, thank you."
"Why not?" Kenshin was taken aback at her reply. Moments passed. He couldn't see anything in her usually expressive face. The effort of hiding her feelings affected her body, however, and she slightly shivered. She turned towards his general direction, giving him a warm smile.
"I don't want you to hurt." She chuckled slightly and just walked away.
Were she able to see, she would have seen Kenshin's face. In pain. In shame. And in awe.
"So you've decided to postpone the Carnelian siege?"
"Yes."
"But Lord Himura, you said yourself that we could take them, their army is weak."
"There are other ways to take the city."
"You mean through the girl?"
"Not in the way you think, Genzai." Kenshin looked outside at Kaoru who was walking around the courtyard. Suddenly a messenger stumbled into the room, his eyes wild and untamed. It was a runner from the southern borders.
"Master Himura, the Yukishiro tribe arrived a sennight ago at the border. His army is five-thousand strong with cavalry and infantry on the way from the west."
Silence enveloped the room as these dark tidings started to manifest themselves clearly in the elders' minds.
"It looks like you made the right decision again, Lord Himura." A young elder looked at the young king of the Mitsurugi-Ryu tribe. "Its time to bring out the Hitokiri Battousai, don't you think?"
At the mention of his forbidden name, Kenshin sharply turned his gaze towards the stupid speaker, shocking him with the full force of his amber eyes.
"Don't call me that" he hissed poisonously as he left the room, leaving the elders wondering at what had just happened.
He went to his bedroom, calming himself down before he slid open the shoji to enter.
"I haven't talked to you for a week, where have you been?" Kaoru nonchalantly asked as she sensed Kenshin's presence walking into the room. Kenshin stared hard at her, was he getting rusty at sneeking around? "Don't be so surprised. Being blind has its perks, you know" Kenshin's eyes wondered in amazement, she can tell my mood as well? "Stop gaping at me."
"Hai." He acknowledged as he walked towards her, their dinner waiting.
"I heard about the rumors, when are you leaving?" Will wonders never cease?
"Why do you care?"
Kaoru bit her lip as confusion darkened her face.
"Anybody would care. People die from these things."
"Not me."
"I wasn't talking about you. I was talking about the people who die because of you," Kaoru answered back, her face torn in confusion. She could never gauge his moods. She was so used to the companionable conversations they have been having, and yet now all of that seem to have never happened.
In front of her, she heard the shuffle of his movement of trying to get up. "Wait!" she lunged for where his arm would have been and caught it. She pulled herself up with his help and traced her fingers to his face. She firmly dragged her index finger on Kenshin's cross scar.
"You never wanted this," she whispered…pity lacing her voice.
"Let. Go."
He left her standing in the middle of the room. It was only in stubbornness that she was able to stand, without emotion, for a long while after he had left.
They were to wait for the Yukishiro to make their move. They still weren't sure if Enishi, the lord of that tribe, intended to fight with them or the Carnelians.
In the meantime, Kenshin paced in the courtyard, thinking of worst-scenario tactics. It was then that he heard a piercing scream outside.
Kenshin arrived in time to see a man slump down, crackling with blue electricity. Kaoru was on her knees, weak from all the spent energy, as two other men circled her. With the dull end of his blade, Kenshin knocked them unconscious and grabbed Kaoru's waist. He pulled her into the bedroom and slammed the door shut.
"Never leave this compound," his voice terrifying, blood-thirsty.
"I…I didn't know I was outside," and Kaoru fainted.
When Kaoru came to, Kenshin was beside her.
"Before you go walking around, ask if either Tsubame or I will be coming with you. Do you understand?" He didn't pause for an answer. "Only the elders and Tsubame know about you. It's for your protection, if any one finds you here they'll take advantage of you." His eyes narrowed at her. There's not a lot of women in camp, my men are starved of companionship… But he didn't say this, he didn't want to worry her.
"Your elders, do you trust them?"
"With my life."
"Oh."
After weeks of waiting, Kenshin still heard no movement from the Yukishiro. Even the elders were antsy and couldn't help talking about the weather, boring the lord of the clan to bits. It was more than what Kenshin could bare thus he made up his mind about something he had been chewing over since Kaoru was attacked. He found her outside, drawing something idly on the dirt. With her kimono bunched up under her, she was an image of beauty and innocence.
"Kaoru, you need to learn how to defend yourself." Kaoru turned towards his voice, tilting her head, bringing a small smile to his lips.
"I'm alright, Kenshin." She retorted stubbornly. She was a little ticked at his pronouncement. Number one: She can take care of herself. Number two: Why does he care now? Did he forget he tried to kill her once? Number three: If no one knew about her, except for the super trustworthy elders, why would she need to learn self-defense?
Kenshin, apparently, could sense her thoughts, or the general idea behind them. The bond between their minds were growing stronger every second they spent together. Stubborn ice met with insistent amber. Kaoru could tell his gaze was liquid fire as he walked up to her and sat down in front of her face.
"I need you to do this for me," he whispered. Kaoru was taken aback at the intimacy of his voice. She racked at her brain, trying to figure out where this pattern of behavior came from. She thought that whenever she could feel the amber emanating from him, it would be from rage or anger. This behavior was completely new.
Kaoru nodded and followed Kenshin to where he usually practiced. Kenshin handed her a small bokken as he took his own sheathed sword as his weapon.
They had been sparring for a while now. Kenshin nodded in approval of her stance and stamina. He didn't believe that Kaoru already knew some self-defense, but when she had unexpectedly landed the first strike, Kenshin stopped going easy on her. She had after all competently beat the High Priestess herself, but he doesn't need to know that.
"Why couldn't you have used your walking cane on those guys the other day?" He asked incredulously. He can't believe he was sweating from fighting a girl—a blind girl.
"Magic is so much easier." Kaoru was sweating and staggering as well. Being bullied so many times, I shouldn't have been surprise that she fights so well, he thought to himself as a particular memory of hers crossed his mind. Kenshin watched her closely. She could anticipate his moves so well that she knew what he was going to do next even when he didn't. Kenshin's eyes were suddenly distracted however, by her hands. They tickled with blue light. Kenshin widened his scope of view and realized that he could see the blue aura that surrounded her. "Are you going to just gape at me all day or what?" Kaoru interrupted.
"Are you sure you're not using your powers?"
"Yeah. I don't think so at least. It doesn't work that way anyways." Kaoru let down her bokken. She could hear Kenshin's confusion.
"How does it work, exactly?"
"Well for starters, I don't control my powers, it controls me."
"Oh." Kenshin didn't move. Kaoru was sweating and panting, eerily lit up with the energy of her body and her soul, her face flushed, her hair tussled. Kaoru's aura appealed to all his senses. He could hear her soft panting, he could see the blush of red, he could smell her sweat, and he could feel her strength. He was deeply intoxicated with Kaoru's vivacity and suddenly realized that he feared what he felt. "That's enough for now."
Kaoru's eyes gleamed in relief then confusion when she realized she was alone again. Kenshin had already walked away without saying a word.