The title for chapter thirty-one is from…Spamalot. Congrats to Yank2324, Easterly Winds, RECblue8, and X-Kate-X.

Hmm…I don't have much to say right now. The story's almost over.

Chapter 32: Keepin' Out of Mischief Now

He was nervous, Elphaba could tell, by the way he kept his eyes downcast, and when they shifted to her, he was alarmed. He stood a ridiculous distance from her when suggesting they talk. He told Elphaba that he and Hermione had something to bring up to her. Careful not to burst out laughing, the green witch acted as though something was wrong, to add to the prince's anxiety.

Elphaba led Fiyero and Hermione back to her rooms, where she prepared tea and sat them in her living room. Hermione, too, seemed restless – she was pacing. For dramatic effect, Elphaba drew the curtains closed and sat down solemnly with her legs crossed.

"Alright, now that we're comfortable, what's all this you were talking about?" she asked, waiting patiently.

"Well, er, we wanted to talk to you about…" Fiyero seemed hesitant, "Hermione, maybe you should take this one."

Hermione's expression was that of someone who was recently slapped. "Oh no, this one is yours," huffed the bushy haired witch, and she sat down on the sofa beside the prince.

Elphaba studied them seriously. "Before you start whatever nonsense," she said in the stern tone she'd adopted from McGonagall to deal with students, "I just wanted to express how thankful I am for all of us to survive the battle. Delving deeper, I wanted to convey my gratitude for the friendship you've both given me in the past years, especially for being so patient after I arrived from the Riddle House. Hermione-" the bushy haired witch swallowed dryly, "for taking part in my rescue."

"Really, Elphaba, this isn't nec-" Fiyero started, but the green witch held up a hand to silence him.

"No, I have to do this." She cast him a look of indifference, wishing very hard that Glinda was there to witness this. "I also want to thank you for being so good about being friends. We broke up roughly, I know, and I'm sorry for that. We carry a deep understanding of one another, and I'm glad we're friends. So, I guess what I'm trying to say is that you both mean a lot to me, and I know you'd never wish to harm me as I would never think of doing so to you. Just… thank you."

Hermione and Fiyero seemed to disappear into the couch, radiating their discomfort through awkward glances. The drapery didn't hang properly since Ron had reduced the rooms to wreckage, much like Elphaba's wincing ribs. Thus, rays of light shone through a bare angle, and Hermione stared at it as though she wanted nothing more than to see outside again.

Elphaba really wished Glinda were there to see it.

"That's very, uh, kind of you, Fae," Hermione stuttered.

"Now, what's this about big announcements?" Elphaba asked happily, clasping her hands together.

If the green witch was seeing correctly, Fiyero was sweating under the pressure. "You see, there's something we want to say, and we decided it would be best to tell you first." Elphaba nodded, indicating that Fiyero should go on, and shifted to cross her legs. "Just because you and I were close in Oz, with what we went through," Fiyero added quickly.

"What? Did you find Weasley or something?" Elphaba raised an eyebrow in fake curiosity.

"N-no." Fiyero was shifting his eyes again.

"Harry's awake?"

"Not exactly," Hermione said lightly.

Elphaba hesitated to think. "Voldemort's awake?"

"Merlin, no!" Fiyero was exasperated now, and Elphaba's lips were twitching from the insatiable urge to laugh. One might call her sadistic, but she believed she deserved a little mockery in the face of their endeavors. "Hermione and I are dating."

"You're what?" Elphaba flared her nostrils for effect, and Fiyero's joints acted out of fear. Perhaps he wanted to run, because his shin connected with the coffee table and violently jolted its contents.

"We've been seeing each other for a month or two," Hermione elaborated bravely, "after the battle, and Dumbledore's funeral."

Elphaba faked a shocked chuckle and shrouded her eyes, as if to ward off a headache. "I can't believe this," she hissed.

Fiyero was at his last straw; it seemed he couldn't handle the pressure. Elphaba had been his biggest relationship and somewhat of a cohort, so if she disapproved, his nerves would be in shambles.

"Look, Elphaba," he began a little louder than intended, "I wanted to come to you because you and I, I thought, used to have something special. You're a great friend. We wanted your blessing for our relationship, Hermione and I, because of that."

Genuinely, the green witch burst out laughing. She couldn't contain herself any longer, and it was enough to torture the two so. They looked crestfallen, especially Fiyero, who resembled a kicked puppy with drooping eyes with a lost, confused expression.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Elphaba roared, wiping her eyes. "I don't mean to laugh at you. It's just… it's so evident that you two are fond of one another. How could I not tell already?"

Hermione blushed. "You could?" she repeated, releasing the grip she kept on her knees.

Elphaba smiled and nodded. "Glinda thinks it's sweet. I think it's wonderful, really, that you found each other. I support you, but," she turned to Fiyero, "why would you need my blessing? I'm not your father, I'm not lonely. I'm flattered, but… you can be incredibly daft."

Fiyero gritted his teeth, but let it go, grabbing for his tea and gulping it down in one shot. He looked as though a sleepless night was restored on the surface of his skin; considerably happier. "I may be daft, but you're just plain mean."

Elphaba grinned proudly. "I know," she shrugged. "Would it make you feel better if we tricked Glinda into something?"

"I was just worried that it would be…well…awkward," Fiyero told her, "since I was your first…you know."

"Nah," Elphaba shrugged. "It's fine. Besides, I have Glinda, remember?"

"True," Hermione smiled. "But Fae…thank you."

Harry wasn't allowed more than two visitors at a time, which was more than enough for him to handle, as Madame Pomphrey put it. Elphaba suspected it was more befit a limit for the nurse, as she couldn't handle much more until the following school term. Harry, who had woken from his coma not a few days before, had been denied visitors until this point. Elphaba paced habitually at the doors of the Hospital Wing, the clicking of her boots echoing off the floor, for the ceiling was too high to reflect meagre noise. She wasn't patient, but she was forced to wait for Fiyero and Hermione to finish their visit.

Finally, the door opened to reveal the Winkie prince. "How is he?" Elphaba asked eagerly.

Fiyero shrugged. "As well as can be expected. Considering a month-long hiatus from independently showering, he doesn't look too bad."

"Oh. Well, thank Merlin for that," Elphaba sighed, unsmiling. "Is Hermione still in there?"

"Yes," Fiyero nodded, starting to leave. "But it's alright for you to go in; she'll be finished soon." They quickened their paces away from one another: Fiyero down the hall, his footsteps never making enough racket to reverberate off the impossibly high ceiling, and Elphaba into the Hospital Wing.

"Harry!" she called, the anxiety that had been building in her mind disappearing at the man's seemingly healthy state. She took a seat next to Hermione at Harry's bedside, who smiled at her quietly.

Harry dusted invisible crumbs off his bed sheets and turned to the green witch. "Hello, Fae," he grinned. "You'll be disappointed to know that your time with the award for Most Time Spent in the Hospital Wing is up. Hand it over, thank you."

"I think I should leave," Hermione interrupted, her chair scraping against the floor. "I'll see you later, Harry, Fae."

"Have fun with Fiyero," Harry called out mockingly. At the comment, his eyes reflected a twinkling that resembled Dumbledore's knack for reassuring people. Elphaba sat quietly and found it fairly ironic.

Hermione whirled around and gave Harry a single swat on the head. He ducked, laughing. "You're as awful as Fae," Hermione declared, not a hint of resentment on her lips. "And if you weren't bed-ridden, you'd find yourself nicely bruised."

"Me?" Elphaba asked innocently. "What did I do?"

Hermione opened her mouth to retort, but contented herself with shaking her head in exasperation. "You're impossible. Both of you," she muttered, creating a long gap of silence. The two remaining Order members watched as she left, the heavy door closing behind her.

"So, Fae," Harry began as soon as Hermione was gone. "tell me, what exactly have I missed?"

"I assume you know full well about Hermione and Fiyero's relationship?" Elphaba guessed, amused.

"Yeah." Harry continued to grin widely. "I also know full well about what you did to them when they told you."

There was something different about Harry, a lighter demeanour, maybe. He'd woken up in a more peaceful world, a kind of rebirth to accommodate his hardships against Voldemort. The worst was over for him. Tthe only feature he needed to compensate for now was a new hobby to fill up the time the war used to. Elphaba mused wryly that attending funerals would do the trick, considering the Light fighters' body count.

"Don't try to convince me you didn't try to do the same," Elphaba warned, "or something like it. They're easy prey."

"Hermione told me she liked Fiyero already before the battle," Harry explained, shrugging slightly. "She'd been watching him for a while, you know, to see if he was over you. I figured it was only a matter of time before Hermione, Miss Determined to Win Everything, would in fact, gain his courtship."

"Now, I find that vaguely devious," Elphaba laughed, "which is why they're perfect for each other."

There was a brief pause, indicating that they'd used up their energies for one subject and the conversation was bound to shift. Harry began, "What was that spell you used? Was it from the Grimmerie?"

Elphaba nodded vigorously, prepared to elaborate. "It was a shielding spell that was supposed to absorb and destroy counter energy to your own. All those times I've missed lunch was to practice, although it turned defective anyhow." She flicked her wrist to indicate the bed, and ultimately, Harry's incapacitated state.

Harry shot her a sober expression. "You saved my life, Fae. It's not as though the spell was invalid. Counts for something, doesn't it?"

"I suppose," Elphaba finally agreed begrudgingly.

"What else have I missed out on?" Harry asked, reclining back onto the mattress. "We're certain Voldemort is finished? It's… it's hard to believe. I mean, he's weaved in and out of the radar so often – that's how he kept prosperous, and I-"

"Yes," Elphaba said overpoweringly. "It's over, Harry. You'd regret missing the celebratory weeks that followed. I can give you the official article from the Daily Prophet if you want, to eliminate any doubts. It's in my rooms." Thinking back to her rooms, however, defeated her smile and reminded her of another concern Harry ought to be informed of.

The Boy-Who-Lived immediately detected that something was amiss. He lost his own grin. "What is it, Fae? Something else happened that you're not telling me," he said simply.

Not wanting to alarm her friend, Elphaba forced a small smile. "It's nothing, really," she said. "I'm dealing with it as best I can."

Harry crossed his arms, strikingly resembling Hermione, as it was her own habit in dealing with the most stubborn of her friends. "Don't say it's nothing and tell me the whole truth."

"Do you remember when you told me about the Weasley sister – Ginny, was it – who broke into your rooms to steal Tom Riddle's diary?" Harry nodded in encouragement for her to continue. "Well, the same thing happened to me a few weeks ago."

"Someone broke into your rooms?" Harry clarified, and Elphaba nodded, waiting for him to follow with a slur of questions. "How? What's been taken? Do you know who did it? When? Why?"

"The Grimmerie is gone," Elphaba finally said, as though it were all that was needed to say. Harry recoiled some, but the green witch figured he deserved the entire truth, which he'd asked after. "I don't wish to upset you, or-"

"You haven't upset me, but it's definitely alarming. You know who did it, then?"

Elphaba let a breath out slowly. "Although some of the Death Eaters' life forces were tied to Voldemort, not all of them were. There's a theory that a lot of the newly recruited members didn't have time to be bound to him, Weasley included. We were going to figure it out while he was in out custody…" Elphaba proceeded to explain the situation to Harry, whose expression remained neutral.

Harry was silent in his own thoughts after Elphaba finished, so she waited for him to say something. This accumulated in minutes slowly dragging by and dying out. She was thankful when he spoke, although he seemed slightly upset. "I can't believe Ron would do something like this- any of this. When I befriended him, he was a completely different person; he was so kind and…and innocent. I don't know when he found the time to change that drastically."

"And you tested him for the Imperious Curse, right?" Elphaba suggested, unable to provide much advice. "He was acting of his own free will?"

"Yes, he was," Harry said absently, frowning at the memory.

"I'm sorry, Harry," Elphaba apologized lightly.

"Yeah, me too." He sighed slightly. "Just be careful about it."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, Ron… in the simplest sense, Fae, Ron hates you." Harry bit his lower lip in deciding how to continue. "He's going to be looking for every opportunity to finish you off, especially now that you took part in Voldemort's defeat. You're one of my best friends, so just watch your back when you deal with this. I don't want to see you get hurt, and if he's in possession of the Grimmerie…"

Elphaba blinked, wishing to obstruct the sudden vision of Dumbledore in her mind and of what he told her before he died. You need to tell Harry and Severus the truth, so that they'll be able to protect you, because I won't be able to. "Weasley can't read the Grimmerie, though, which makes it easier on us," Elphaba said, simultaneously wondering whom she was trying to assure.

"But maybe some other people can who he could team up with," Harry protested.

"You're one of the two other people who can read the Grimmerie, or at least, who can read it productively. The other is in Oz, in prison, according to Glinda. Look, Harry, there's no reason to get worked up about this, I'm dealing with it effectively. It's my fault for not putting enough security around the Grimmerie. So just… don't worry so much," Elphaba concluded, eerily reminding herself of the people trying to cease her own anxiety.

"But-" Harry began, but was silenced by Elphaba's stern look. He sighed, "Fine. Any other news I've neglected to pick up?"

"Glinda's leaving," Elphaba admitted, felling her heart clench. "She was going to stay until you woke, and now that you've been okay for a few days, she's preparing to leave." The light-hearted banter that they'd experienced before was permanently replaced with a gloomy, solemn air by now, one that was lingering over the green witch more so than when she didn't try to amend it.

"Leave?" Harry questioned.

"She needs to go back to Oz, which I can accept. I just wish… oh, never mind," Elphaba stopped herself. She noticed that the windows behind Harry's bed were open and that in the early morning, a choir of birds was singing a happy tune. All of a sudden Elphaba wanted them to stop.

"What?" Harry asked, making as if to lay his hand overtop hers, if she didn't pull away. "You wish what?"

"That…well, I wish I could at least talk to her. We'll be separated with no form of communication, and though I've tried to find several methods, they've come up short. I wasted time trying to find a way to stay in touch instead of appreciating her actually being here."

"There's always owls or Floo Power," Harry suggested.

"But Oz is a completely different world," Elphaba complained. "I highly doubt owls would be able to find her, and I don't believe she's got a specific fireplace address to Floo to. Unless I arrive there by some freak mistake, by messing up my words or something." Merlin help me if that happens, Elphaba finished silently.

"You could probably enchant a Portkey, or go through the portal, too," Harry said, genuinely trying to help. "In fact, when you do, tell me. I'm quite curious myself as to what Oz is like."

Elphaba muttered something under her breath about curious wizards and Oz not mixing well, but raised her voice to reason with him. "I can't go to Oz every time I want to talk to Glinda."

"Well…" Harry fluffed out the sheet shrouding him up to his lap, speaking thoughtfully. "I suppose there is a simpler way."

"And that would be your cue to tell me," Elphaba said, raising an eyebrow at him. There was some hope in her voice, one that was for Harry to recognize just how much she wanted to be with Glinda. "What other way?"

Harry didn't bother to answer her directly. Instead, he wrung his hands and said to her, "This is what you need to do, okay? Floo into my apartment. Potter Place," he said with an instructional tone of voice. "Go to my workroom, and there'll be a desk. Open the middle drawer on the left side and there'll be two objects wrapped in grey tissue at the back. I think they're in a cardboard box. Bring them back here for me, since Pomphrey will have my head if I even think of leaving the Wing."

Elphaba looked at him doubtfully, but Harry only smiled at her. "You'll see," he said as he waved her off. "They were given to me by someone who… meant a lot, but I figure you'll make much better use of them."

Elphaba stood and made for the fireplace at the other end of the Wing. "Thank you, Harry," she said, dipping her green fingers into the Floo Powder and extracting a leaking handful. "I appreciate it more than you know. Really."

"And Fae?" Harry called before she threw the powder in, causing the green witch to turn to him. He pointed accusingly. "For the love of Merlin, no peeking!"

Elphaba nodded, eying him suspiciously. She turned and threw the powder into the fireplace. "Potter Place." Dangerous looking green flames engulfed emerald flesh, and Harry was alone in the Hospital Wing.

He settled back in his bed and waited for Elphaba to return, or at least for another visitor for company. After hearing the timeline of Glinda and Elphaba's relationship- five years apart, one year together- he was glad to help his friends stay in touch. The both of them deserved to be happy together, though he couldn't understand why they needed to separate so severely. Hopefully, the two objects would successfully work across different worlds as it did with different planes, from Hogwarts to London.

Coming up: Parting is such sweet sorrow.

Does anyone know what those two objects are? If you've read the HP books, they're actually in there. I didn't make them up.

OMG! I can't believe it! One more chapter and then, this will be over. Unfortunately, chapter 33 seems to be coming quite slowly.

-Wolfie