Here's the next chapter guys, this is where things start getting shitty for Santana (even though they have already been pretty shitty...)

if any of you didnt know, i am now splitting this story into two parts, so the end of part one is coming up soon. thank you to Perhaps Glee for helping me out with my questions and ideas. x

Chapter 20

"Right, come on. Get up and stop moping about." Santana ordered as she pulled off her bed sheets and threw them to the floor.

"Go away, San." Marco grumbled as he pulled his pillow over his head and curled up into a ball. He hadn't got out of bed in over a week and frankly, Santana was sick of it. Yes he had just left his wife and yes he didn't have a real home but he was just making himself feel worse by acting like this. He was making himself depressed and Santana wasn't about to let that happen.

"No. Get up now. You have to find your own place or at last start helping around the house. Like start by cleaning my room!" she shouted as she pointed to the mess the man had made. "Get up now or you can leave." She bluffed. Of course she wouldn't kick her own father out of her home when he didn't have a place to go. She really didn't mind her father staying here, most of the time he was on his laptop typing up some paper for the hospital or researching stuff for Santana's heart. To be honest, Santana felt safer know her father was just down the hall if she ever felt that pain return – which it had and was getting more frequent lately, she'd told her doctor but he told her there was nothing much they could do for her. She kept a strip of painkillers in her pocket at all times which helped with the pain for a while but didn't completely get rid of it. She still hadn't told anyone about the pain though, not even Brittany. She didn't want them worrying about her.

Marco's head shot up at the Latina's words. She wore her best poker face that was almost impossible to see through. He got up slowly and walked off towards the bathroom. "I'll take a shower and start cleaning up in here. I'm sorry, baby."

Santana smiled softly at his words and wandered back out into the living room. The apartment had been way too quiet lately after Brittany had started her new job. Of course Santana was happy for her; Brittany loved her job more than anything but that didn't mean Santana didn't miss her. She missed her like hell.

Santana would be lucky if she got to see Brittany for more than two hours lately. Brittany would be up early and return at five but then Santana shift would start at seven so they only really got a chance to talk in bed but by then both girls were exhausted.

Santana sighed and slumped down onto the sofa as she picked at some left over pizza from the night before. She sprawled her body flat out, one leg was hanging over the back of the sofa and the other over the armrest. She groaned loudly as boredom began to take over her body.

Suddenly, her phone vibrated from beside her. She sighed and lazily flapped her arms around lazily as she tried to find her phone. She picked it up but almost threw it against the wall when she saw the name on the screen.

Rachel: Hello, Santana. I have a free afternoon and I was wondering if you wanted to get coffee? Wait, no coffee. How about a late lunch? I know that's probably not the way you would want to spend your afternoon but I need to get out of this apartment before I go crazy and since we haven't seen each-other lately, I thought it would be fun?

Santana mumbled a stream of incoherent words into a cushion. It really pissed her off how the smaller girl would insist on using the correct grammar instead of text language. But maybe getting out the house for a while was good; she had spent the best part of the last two months sleeping, cleaning the apartment or working. She really needed to get out for a while, even if it was with Rachel Fucking Berry.

Sure, why not?

She sent back a quick text and only had to wait a minute before her phone buzzed again.

Rachel: Really? Okay! I will come and pick you up in half an hour?

K

She put her phone back down onto the coffee table before getting up to change out of her sweats. As she walked into her room she was met by her father who had actually started to clean her room.

"I was joking about cleaning you know?" she muttered as she pulled on a pair of leggings a hoodie and a red beanie.

"It's the least I could do, and I promise I will start looking for a new place to live." he said with a shy look.

"You don't have to start looking just yet. I like having you around, I miss us being this close." She went and sat down on her bed beside her father and tilted her head to rest it on his shoulder. She smiled when he wound his arm around her waist and pulled her closer to him. "I don't want you to go yet."

They sat in silence for a while. Marco was sure that if he opened his mouth to say something all that would come out would be a sob. He love Santana more than anything on this planet and he regretted so much not spending enough time with her over the past nineteen years. His work had always come first or he would be to busy being pushed around by his wife to have time to be with his daughter. The fact that his daughter didn't hold a grudge against him for that and still wanted him to stay meant so much to him. He couldn't believe that this could be all over in less than seven months. "I won't go anywhere until you want me to. Okay?" Santana nodded before hugging her father tightly.

"Love you." She whispered before standing up and walking over to the door. She had never been any good with all this 'family love' stuff mainly because her parents had never been around to make her feel loved. But she knew her father loved her, she could see it in his eyes and hear it in his voice when he spoke to her. "I'm going out with Rachel for lunch; call me if you need anything."

She jogged down the stairs to the front of her building where Rachel was just pulling up in her car. Santana waved with a smile as she ran over to the door. Even though it was late March and the sun was out, there was still an icy chill in the air that caused the Latina to shudder as she fastened her seatbelt.

"Hey, San." Rachel beamed at the girl and pulled her into a death grip of a hug.

Santana was taken aback by the sudden gesture but tapped the girls back anyway. "Hi." Rachel pulled away from the sidewalk and began driving down the street. "So where are we going?"

"Breadstix!" Rachel fist bumped the air and began to giggle when Santana gave her an odd look. "I miss Lima… and since that's one of the only places we were all together I thought it would be cool."

Santana nodded her head in agreement, she did have a point. "Sound's good, Rach-" she stopped mid-sentence when Rachel head whipped around to face her. "Uh, I mean, Berry." Santana blushed.

Rachel shook her head with a small smile. "Will you even call me by my first name, Santana?"

"No." Santana smirked at Rachel playfully. "It's just not in my nature. Sorry." She shrugged still smiling. "Where's Q? She's not meant to be working today…"

Rachel sighed. "She's out apartment hunting…" Santana cock her head to the side questioningly. "Our place is begging to feel really crowded with four of us living there." She explained. Santana just nodded. She wasn't surprised. Their place was really small and if she was Quinn, she would have murdered everyone in that place by now, well maybe no Blaine. He was more bearable than the other two but only just. Santana was happy that Brittany and hers place was twice the size.

"Any luck?"

"Not yet, we can't afford anywhere decent." She sighed sadly. Santana still wasn't surprised. Quinn was the only one bringing in the money and to be honest it wasn't the best wages working at the bar. "It's kind of funny watching Quinn get all stressed out about it, you know what she's like." She giggled.

Santana rolled her eyes with a smirk and nodded. She did know what the blonde was like, she could get so wound up easily after everything she went through in high school, she had a short temper but it was funny to watch her storm out of the room or scream at nothing. At least she didn't take it out on her friends or Rachel. It wasn't anything serious but high school had really affected the girl, Santana didn't know where Quinn would be now if she didn't have Rachel.

Rachel was a good person, amazing even and Quinn and Santana regretted the way they treated her back in high school, Quinn especially. Sometimes Santana found it hard to understand why the smaller girl ever forgave them for what they put her through…

"We're here!" Rachel shouted as she pulled Santana from her thoughts. She clambered out of the car and raced over to the restaurant leaving Santana to slowly wander behind her.

By the time Santana made it inside, Rachel had already gotten them both a table near a window at the far end of the room. Santana made her way over and sat down opposite Rachel and they both ordered their food.

"So how are things with you and Brittany?" Rachel asked half way through her meal.

"We're good, why wouldn't we be?" she replied shortly.

"Well apart from the obvious," she pointed her fork towards Santana's heart. "Is there anything else going on?"

Santana just shrugged and carried on eating. She didn't want to get into this conversation now, not after what happened last night. "We're still fine."

"Just fine huh?"

"Yes, Rachel. Just fine." She snapped. Rachel flinched slightly and went quiet. "Sorry." Santana mumbled. She played with her food for a while as she contemplated telling Rachel. She needed to talk to someone. She couldn't keep everything locked up inside of her. "We just had a little scare last night. I must have fallen asleep in the bath or something but when Brittany found me she immediately thought the worst…" her head dropped as she tried to hide her teary eyes. "She was so scared."

Rachel's lips formed a perfect 'o' as she just stared at Santana. She didn't know what to say, nothing she could say would change what was happening to her or the way people would act around her. So instead she reached a hand over the top of the table and placed it gently on top of Santana's. Surprisingly, the Latina didn't flinch away, instead she turned it over and gripped Rachel's hand as tears began to silently fall down her cheeks.

Santana couldn't believe she was crying in front of Rachel Berry of all people. But she found the other girl strangely comforting. She felt like she could cry in front of her and not be afraid of being judged or interrupted, she felt like it was okay to cry for once.

Rachel stood up out of the booth still keeping a hold of Santana's hand and sat down beside her. Santana leaned into the warm body; the smaller girl wrapped an arm around her and held her while her body shook. "Thank… you…" Santana managed between sobs.

Rachel just held her tighter, she didn't need to ask what for or say anything else.

When the sobbing finally subsided, both girls returned to their now cold food. Santana's eyes were blood shot and her chest ached. "B and I had an idea…" Santana started. Rachel looked up from her now empty plate. "I thought that it would maybe be cool to go back to Lima for a few weeks in April for Brittany's birthday? The four of us."

Rachel considered it for a second her lips slowly curled up into a smile. "I think that would be a great idea, Santana."

"I was wondering if you could help me look for a hotel for me and B, I'm no good with that stuff and her parents-" she was cut off mid-sentence once again when Rachel held up her hand and shook her head.

"Stay with us, we have three spare rooms." She offered but Santana frowned.

"Rachel, that's really sweet of you but we wouldn't want to over crowd or anything like that."

"Nonsense! It would be a pleasure." She smiled sweetly.

"Are you sure?" Rachel just nodded. "You really are awesome, Rach." Santana didn't care that she had just called the girl by her first name; she didn't want to be a bitch to her anymore. Rachel had been nothing but kind to her.

Rachel was taken aback slightly by the use of her name but shuck off the shock quickly. "Well I think I better be getting back, Quinn will be missing me." Santana rolled her eyes but smiled anyway. She stood up and pulled out her money to pay for both of their meals and quickly pushed Rachel towards the exit before she could protest.

They climbed into the car and Rachel turned to Santana with a pout. "I would have paid; it was my idea to come out."

"Shush, it's the least I could do for what you done for me in there and then letting us stay at your house." She pulled Rachel into a hug. "Thank you." She whispered then pulled away. Rachel stared at the girl in shock with wide eyes causing Santana to chuckle softly. "Really that shocked, Rachel."

Rachel squeaked at the use of her name once again and nodded slowly. "I must be dreaming." She mumbled to herself as she pulled out of the car park and drove back to Santana's in silence.

"Hurry your fat ass up, Quinn, or we're leaving without you!" Santana shouted up from her car. Brittany and Rachel sat singing along to some Disney CD while Santana tapped her thumbs impatiently on the steering wheel. They had packed up their suitcases, threw them in the trunk of Santana's car and were ready to drive off to Lima. Santana refused to get on a plane, even though it was on her bucket list and would make the journey quicker. She couldn't bring herself to do it. Maybe that would be the one thing she wouldn't cross off her list.

Marco was still living in their apartment and as much as Santana was enjoying having him around she needed a break from him. At least she didn't have to worry about anyone breaking in. He promised that he would have found a place to live by the time they got and would move out as soon as they wanted rid of him.

Quinn poked her head out of her bedroom window. "Shut up, S! I do not have a fat ass!" she screamed and threw a bottle of some hand cream out of the window that just narrowly missed the car. "I don't have a fat ass do I Rach?" she asked softly, her voice completely changed from the way she had just spoke to Santana less than a second before.

"No baby." Rachel laughed as she shouted back up to the blonde hanging out of the window.

"You get a scratch on my baby; I will cut you, Fabrey!" Quinn just rolled her eyes as she zipped up her case and pulled it through her apartment.

"Aw, thank you Santana." Brittany smiled next to her and planted a kiss on the girl's cheek.

"I was talk about- You're welcome, Britt." Santana planted her own kiss on Brittany's lips. The blonde wound her fingers into dark locks and held their lips together. They were pulled apart when a banging sound echoed from the back of the car.

"Pop the trunk, San."

"Jesus, Q! How much shit are you bringing!" Santana gasped at the size of Quinn's case that could easily fit herself and Rachel inside of it. Quinn just rolled her eyes and lifted the case into the trunk then ran round to the front to fold back the roof of the car, oh how she loved Santana's father for buying her this car, she then climbed in the back with her girlfriend and wrapped her arm around her waist.

Santana flipped her Aviators down over her eyes and pulled out onto the road. "Lima better be ready for us!" she shouted as Brittany held her hands in the air and let the cool air run through her hair.

"They'll have missed us so much!" Quinn shouted sarcastically as Rachel pulled her in for a kiss.

When they finally got to the high way, Santana hit the gas and sped off down the road. Brittany turned the radio up full blast and they all joined in with Teenage dream. Brittany couldn't take her eyes off of Santana and resisted the urge to slip her hand in between the girl's thighs.

"This is going to be the best two weeks ever." Brittany giggled as the song came to an end.

"Of course it will, Britt-Britt." Santana said with a beaming smile. "You're going to have an awesome Birthday as well."

"Duh, that's a given." Brittany dead panned causing the other three girls to giggle and roll their eyes.

After four hours or so of constant driving, Santana began to feel sleepy and as if the universe could hear her very thoughts, a gas station appeared in the distance. "Hey guys, is it okay if we pull over for a while. I'm going to fall asleep."

"I need to pee."

"I'm starving."

"My butt hurts."

Came a round of voices in reply. Santana pulled over and practically rolled out of the car as she tried to stretch all of her muscles at once. Her spin and leg boned clicked and popped and she let out a satisfied sigh. Quinn and Brittany ran off to the shop to get some food and use the toilet while Rachel offered to fill up on gas. In the distance, the sun was setting over the horizon painting the sky an array of purples, oranges and pinks. Four more hours and they would be in Ohio and Santana would be met by that starry night sky she had missed so much.

The girls all climbed back into the car and just sat for a few minutes. Brittany had brought Santana a coffee – she swore it was a one off just so she could drive because she wouldn't trust anyone else behind the wheel. Before they had even hit the road again, Brittany and Rachel were fast asleep and snoring softly. Santana chuckled softly as she looked into the mirror and winked at Quinn.

"You excited, Q?"

"Kind of, I don't really want to run into my parents though." She grimaced at the thought. Things hadn't ended well with the Fabrey family after Quinn told them about her and Rachel they reacted worse than they did with the news of Beth. Luckily for Quinn, the Berry's were kind and loving people and accepted her into their home with open arms, despite her history with their daughter.

"Don't worry, Quinn. We'll fight 'em off." Santana shot the girl another wink before turning her gaze back to the road. It was only a little past seven o'clock but the air was freezing and the sky was pitch black. Sadly it was cloudy so Santana couldn't see her stars yet. She hoped that would change in the time they would be in Lima.

Another hour passed and Quinn had finally fallen asleep. Santana was left in silence so she decided to put the radio on for background noise. Her thumbs started tapping along to the beat of the music, her head was soon to follow by bobbing and before she knew it she was full on belting out the words.

I did my best to notice

When the call came down the line

Up to the platform of surrender

I was brought but I was kind

And sometimes I get nervous

When I see an open door

Close your eyes

Clear your heart...

Cut the cord

She looked over to the girls sitting in the car but none of them even stirred as she sang along.

Are we human?

Or are we dancer?

My sign is vital

My hands are cold

And I'm on my knees

Looking for the answer

Are we human?

Or are we dancer?

Her foot pressed down on the gas as adrenalin took over her body and goose bumps rose on her arms as she carried on singing. A car that was driving alongside her wound their window down. "Great singing!" the elderly woman cheered for her. Santana only blushed.

Pay my respects to grace and virtue

Send my condolences to good

Give my regards to soul and romance,

They always did the best they could

And so long to devotion

You taught me everything I know

Wave goodbye

Wish me well...

You've gotta let me go

Just as she was about to start singing the chorus, a burning pain seared up her chest causing her to swerve violently. "Fucking hell!" she screamed out and clutched her chest in pain as she veered off the road into a field. She gasped for air desperately as her vision went dark. "Britt!" She screamed for help when the pain got worse, her arm went out to the side and clutched at the blonde's body sitting next to her.

She could hear the panicked voices of the other girls but she couldn't move. Everything was hurting and she was scared she was about to throw up everywhere.

"San… Baby? Can you hear me?" Brittany's voice was frantic as she climbed out of her seat to lean over Santana. The Latina nodded and mumbled something under her breath.

"What happened?" Rachel shouted but received now answer. Quinn was already running over to the driver's side and pulling Santana out onto the grass.

"It must be the coffee!" Quinn shouted. "Where are her pills?" but before she had even gotten the sentence out Brittany was by her side passing her the white pills.

"We need to get her into the car and keep her warm." Brittany instructed. She hadn't told Santana but Marco had told her everything to do in case something like this ever happened and he wasn't there to help. Quinn gave her an unsure look. "Now!" Brittany shouted at Quinn causing her to jump into action.

They carefully lifted the smaller girl into the back of the car and wrapped her up under their coats while Rachel held her feet slightly in the air as instructed by the taller blonde. Santana's head was resting in Brittany's lap and Quinn pulled the car back onto the road. "Should we go to the hospital?" Quinn asked with a shaky voice, her hands shook and her eyes were watering as the panic built inside of her.

"No! It's too far away. My dads can help her; just put your foot down." Rachel instructed. Brittany kept quiet through the whole interaction, her hand stroked up and down Santana face softly and she planted barely there kisses on her forehead.

"Don't… let-" Santana gasped sharply, "them take me… to the hospital, Britt…" her eyes began to droop slowly and everything went silent.

"Stay with me, San. Keep your eyes open. I love you." A sob broke through Brittany's lips. "I love you so much." A single tear drop fell to the Latina's chest. "Please don't leave me. I'm not ready to lose you yet."