If you thought Chapter 4 was rough you have not seen anything yet. We appreciate everyone who has stayed with us and we really hope you liked this chapter.
All glee characters belong to FOX and Ryan Murphy. All non-Glee characters belong to yours truly.
Hope you like it =)
But I wont do that
Thursday, November 20th
Santana wakes up with a loss of where she is; what she is wearing. What makes her so sure of this is 1) the body laying next to her, and 2) the throbbing headache and dry mouth indicating that she drank way to much last night.
"Ugh!" the body next to her groans in frustrated exhaustion. Santana felt an overwhelming need to escape and began to stealthily crawl out of bed.
"Whoa!" Santana stumbles but regains her balance by placing her hand on the bed.
"Santana I'm not some cheap whore you can sneak out on after a one night stand." Puck sits up and Santana freezes. "Unless your willing to pay me now." Puck moves his eyebrows suggestively.
Santana scoffs at him. "In your dreams Puckerman." Santana turns towards him as her head begins to pound. "Why did you let me drink so much?" she groans out loud while rubbing the side of her head.
"Not like I could stop you." Puck says before altering his voice to a more female oriented pitch. "I'll go all lima heights on your ass if you even think about touching my liquor." Puck sits up showing his bare chest.
"Your such a coward." Santana looks at him then at herself. "What did you do with my clothes." Santana asks pulls at the shoulders of the t-shirt.
"You threw them at Joel." Puck gets up with his boxers on and walks over to his closet and pulls on some shirts and a shirt.
"Oh yea, where is Joely at." Santana snickers.
"Didn't you give him a hard enough time last night?" Puck says smiling, "He's a good guy." Puck adds as glimpses of Joel carrying Santana and images of Santana stripping off her clothes and throwing them at Joel as he blushes flash through her head.
"I just want to apologize, which room is his?" Santana asks as she mischievously hurries out the room. "Joely, Joely! Come out and play." Santana calls playfully for Joel as she leaves Pucks room.
"Santana! He isn't-, oh whatever." He sighs as he slowly follows her out of the room. Santana sees a pile of folded clothes in front of a doorway that she guesses is the door to Joel's room. Santana pushes the door open and notices a bulletin board full of pictures of a woman. Santana feels Pucks presence close in behind her. "I never took Joely as a stalker." Puck reaches around Santana and closes the door softly.
"He isn't." Puck looks down not wanting to say more.
"Are they still together?" Santana asks feeling a cold shiver run down her spine. Puck looks either away but tries to avoid eye contact. "What happened?" Santana asks hoping Puck would deflect.
"Santana don't you remember, it was a big deal when he told you last night. It's why he took your keys." Puck says sadly. "Look don't worry about it, anyways, he went to drop off Sam's truck after he finished fixing it." Puck attempts to change the subject.
"Oh." Santana grits her teeth to catch the rage boiling inside at the mention of Sam's name. "I'm going to shower." she heads to Puckerman's room and grabs a pair of sweats and walks into the bathroom.
Quinn watches Brittany silently as Brittany tries to massage the exhaustion from her eyes with her palms. "Why didn't you call me? You realize I stayed up all night worried sick." Quinn whispered to Brittany while stealing a look over at Sam who was making breakfast.
"I broke my phone." Brittany looks down while holding her head up. Sam glances at his friends before making a show of tossing a pancake up in the air.
"Fine, let's grab you a new one after breakfast. Or just take mine, because I would die if anything happens to you." Quinn sighs biting her bottom lip.
Brittany mumbles an "Okay." as Sam place their breakfast in front of them. "Don't worry about it. We can go get one some other time." Brittany waves Quinn off to get her to change the topic.
"Fine, whatever. Sam your going to kill my figure with pancakes every morning." Quinn turns her frustration to Sam.
"You don't have to eat them." Sam says knowingly.
"It's okay Sammy, I love your pancakes." Brittany smiles at him. The sound of a soft knock rings from the front door. The entire household turns in shock staring at the oddity. Quinn looks at her companions expectantly before finally breaking down.
"I guess, I'll get it." Quinn says sensing Sam and Brittany's lack of enthusiasm. Quinn strolls over to the door at an even pace. Quinn cracks the door slightly and looks out cautiously. "Hello?" Quinn asks giving a confused look at the stranger outside her door.
"Yes. I'm Joel. I'm looking for Sam." He says after starring at Quinn longer than unnecessary. "I uh fixed his truck.." he said spinning the keys around with his pointer finger.
"What, you were able to fix my truck." Sam comes up behind Quinn and open the door wider inviting Joel in. "He is Puck's room mate, Joel, right."
"Yeah, it's Joel. I figured I'd just bring it over." Joel says as he pushes some hair back into his beanie. "I just needed to get out our place for a bit."
"Puck bring over a random girl again." Quinn smiles recalling who Puck was in High school.
"Puck said she was a friend from High school. Very pretty! It wasn't like that though." he shuffles uncomfortably where he stands. "She was really drunk and kept crying over her girlfriend … uh Brenda… uh Brandy… I don't know I felt bad for her though she was really broken." Quinn and Sam's jaws drop.
"Brittany-" Quinn turns to Brittany trying to ask her if she's okay.
"That's it!" Joel jumps in smiling proudly for remembering the name.
"Excuse me." Brittany mutters quietly as she heads to her room closing the door behind her.
"Did I say something?" confusion drips from his words. A slow realization dawned on Joel. "Ugh, I'm so stupid. I'm so sorry guys."
Sam sat Quinn and Joel down and the three of them ate breakfast and made small talk. Everything was going well when Brittany's voice rang in behind them. "You're married Joel?" Brittany questions as she takes a seat between Sam and Quinn.
"Um, Yes, I was." Joel pauses between each word while playing with the ring on his finger. Joel begins staring down at the food on his plate.
"You volunteering today? Quinn asks Brittany noticing her change of clothes into her Animal Shelter shirt. Quinn can see Joel's uncomfortable gestures and tries to change the subject.
Brittany ignores Quinn and continues talking to Joel, "Why aren't you together? What happened?" Joel hesitates answering and Quinn cuts in.
"Brittany!" Quinn exclaims while staring at Brittany.
"What? I was just asking." Brittany glares back at Quinn.
"Quinn… it's okay." Joel says and touches Quinn's arm. She looks at him and smiles weakly. Joel reaches inside his shirt and reveals a necklace that held a matching wedding ring and a baby shaped charm with a birth stone inside. "She was hit by a drunk driver she didn't make it." Joel smiles weakly.
Quinn gasps, "I'm so sorry!" Quinn gives Joel a compassionate look. Joel shrugs sadly and begins moving his food around his plate. Brittany gives Joel a questioning look.
"So why do you still wear the ring? I mean your not married anymore." Brittany asks innocently.
Joel freezes, and Sam drops his utensils his eyes popping out of his head. "Brittany aren't you going to be late." Quinn rushes to the rescue pointing at the clock that reads 11:07pm.
"Oh shoot you're right. Well nice to meet you Joel and I will be back tonight." Brittany kisses Sam and Quinn on the cheek and rushes out the door.
"Hey, guys that reminds me I've got to get to a job. Thanks Joel for fixing my truck. Tell Puck I'll be by Monday so I can finish before Thanksgiving." Sam says before dashing to his room to get ready. Joel gives Sam a wave and gets up starting towards the door. Quinn gets up and joins Joel on the trek to the door.
"Hey, how are you getting home? Didn't you just bring Sam's truck to him?" Quinn asks with concern.
"Hmm, Oh the walk will prolly do me good at this point." Joel mumbles after a moment the obvious distraction showing slightly on his face.
"I don't think so mister. I will take you home." Quinn states firmly. She grabs her keys and purse and follows him out the apartment. " It's the blue beetle over there." She directs him to her car.
"Wow, you're joking right, that's a tiny car." He snickers at the vehicle that would be more suited as a roller skate.
"You could walk home and miss my lovely presence, it that's what you want." Quinn teases Joel.
"Now why would I miss out hanging out with a beautiful lady, just because I can't fit in her impossibly small car." Joel teases back giving her a soft smile waiting for Quinn's retort.
Quinn climbs in the driver side her vehicle. "Get in the car or hold onto the bike rack, your choice." Quinn gives Joel a playful smile. Joel slowly and cautiously crawls into the passenger seat. Quinn loses control giggling hysterically at Joel squeezed inside her tiny car.
It's so, not funny Quinn." Joel huffs before chuckling himself.
"Your knees are higher than the dashboard." Quinn manages to say before she starts laughing even harder.
"I got a truck because my wife drove a car like this." Joel says non chalantly.
"Haha, well that's good. Hopefully you won't dent my roof with your freakishly tall body." She smiles starting the car up.
"You've been looking at my body, I see." He raises an eyebrow at her and Quinn turns away blushing. "Thanks for the ride home, you didn't have to." Joel flashes a smile at her.
"I wanted to." Quinn backs the car out and heads to Puck's apartment. "This is really fun. Watching you try to escape will be very entertaining." Quinn glances at him.
"You really do enjoy watching me squirm." Joel says with his cute smile.
"Do you want to go out tonight?" Quinn says quickly then starts to stutter, "N-n-no-not like go out, but hangout?" Quinn asks sheepishly.
"Yeah, that sounds nice." Joel smiles brightly. "It's been a long time since being around someone has been so easy, I don't know so comfortable.
Brittany gets off the subway and makes her way to the animal shelter. She sighs as she walks in. Animals usually cheer me up. Lets see if they can today. Brittany begins to sign as a young naive' looking brunette smiles up at her from behind the desk.
"Hello Brittany" the brunette says cheerfully.
"Hello Marley" Brittany shows her a tight smile before she continues to fill out the volunteer sheet.
Brittany heads to the cat section where she sees an orange fat cat that reminds her of Lord Tubbington.
"Hello Tabby" Brittany lets the cat out of its cage and carries it to the cat play pen, where she sits down and places Tabby on her lap. Tabby begins to purr as Brittany begins stroking the cats head. Brittany smiles at the cat before leaning down and placing her cheek against the cat's fur and then kisses it softly.
"How can you give someone three years of your life and they just throw it away" She ruffles between the cats ears. "You don't know either huh, they just abandoned you. That's so sad Tabby. I'm sorry." Brittany pulls the cat close. It continues to meow for more attention. "They had a baby and just kicked you to the curb. I think I've been replaced too." Brittany says sadly wiping some of the tears that fall from her face. "You're right it's the small things that give it away, like how she pushes her hair behind her ear just like she used to do for you." Brittany sobs for awhile before Tabby growls hungrily.
"Oh, you guys are hungry? I'm sorry guys you're all starring and all I'm doing is sitting here crying." Brittany says softly as she begins to bury herself in cleaning the cages and feeding the animals. She continues to mutter her thoughts under her breathe as she works. She wipes her tears away time from time while working.
"Brittany, I need your help?" Marley's voice shatters Brittany's thoughts. Brittany wipes her face and clears her throat before heading where Marley is.
"Hey Marley, you needed help?" Brittany looks at Marley not noticing the figure who is standing behind her.
"This girl found a stray can and I was wondering if you could handle it since I am about to go on lunch" Marley packs her stuff up as Brittany waves her off signaling she can go.
"How may I hel-" Brittany's blood turns cold and her words die out as she stares at the person in front of her. "Get out" Brittany says firmly pointing towards the door behind the girl.
The girl stands in stunned silence for a moment before picking up the deathly thin dog from beside her. "I-I-I didn't know." She carries the dog towards the exit as quickly as she can manage. The dogs whimpering rang from the girls arms.
"Ok. Wait!" Brittany shouts. "Alright bring the dog here." Brittany reluctantly stretches her hands out towards the sick animal.
The girl freezes and turns around walking towards Brittany. "I feed him a little. I didn't want to make him sick." She pauses and adds. "I brought him here because they wont put him down. I didn't, I didn't know…" the girls words fall off.
"Elise. Stop it. I could care less about you right now." Brittany takes the dog and walks to the back. "Wait right here" Brittany says looking over her back making eye contact with Elise. She turns around and disappears to the back.
Elise begins to fidget uncomfortably and starts to look longingly at the door. Brittany walks in with a cold face. "Your not even pretty. I don't understand why she would cheat on me. With you of all people." Brittany comes out from behind the counter and stands in front of Elise.
"Wait, What?" Elise scoffs, "It's not even like that Brittany. She felt alone, worthless, unloved, I-I-I was just there trying to be a good friend." Elise speaks more with her hands that emphasized her words.
"A good friend? A good friend wouldn't fuck their friend because they were lonely! Especially when they are taken." Brittany stomps her foot to let some of the Rage/Heartache seep away into the floor.
"A good girlfriend wouldn't drive someone to fuck the first person that showed them a little attention." Elise felt her blood boiling over what they night may have cost her.
Brittany pulls her hand back smacking Elise across the face. " Don't you dare blame this on me." Brittany shouts in her face." Get the hell out of here. Go ruin someone else's happiness." Brittany clenches her jaw biting back tears that threaten to fall from the truth of Elise's words.
Elise touches the red mark that forms on her face gingerly and watches the agony that was playing on Brittany's face. "I didn't mean it." Elise says suddenly her own anger being washed away with compassion." I did this. I hurt you. I wanted this." Elise choked out trying to flip Brittany's sadness back to anger.
"No. I messed up, I-I-have to go" Brittany rushes out of the animal shelter.
"Great, just fucking great." Elise exclaims as she pulls out her phone to text Santana.
Quinn pulls on a robe and bundles her wet hair up in a towel after exiting the shower. She opens her closet and starts to toss outfits onto her canopy bed.
I Kissed a girl and I liked it.
Rachel's ring tone sang from Quinn's nightstand. Quinn quickly glides over to her phone and answered. "Yes, Rachel?" Quinn's voice sang with an ease that had been missing for quite some time.
"Satan just came home." Rachel smiles at the sound of Quinn's voice.
"Oh that's great." Quinn stares at the outfits laying on her bed before turning to decide between two pair of shoes. "Have you talked to her yet." Quinn asks as an afterthought.
"Nope, and there she goes." Rachel states as Santana flees through the front door in a hurry.
"Quinn! Quinn! Joel's here." Sam hells from the living room. Quinn cover the receiver with her hand.
"I'll be out in a minute." Quinn removes her hand. "Did you say something?" Quinn asks softly.
"Nothing, Who's Joel?" Rachel asks fairly quickly.
"Byeee, Rachel." Quinn sing songs into the phone.
"Quinn don't you dare han-" Quinn ends the call and tosses her phone on the bed.
"Sam! Let him in, I'll be there in a minute." Quinn grabs a long sleeve whit shirt with a light green jean jacket with black tight jeans and black converses. She picks up a lime green beanie, Shakes her head and tosses it back on the bed. Quinn pulls her bun out and shakes her hair out to let it fall into place. She runs her fingers through her hair, grabs her phone, keys and purse. She rushes out of the room nearly running into Joel.
"Oh, hey" Quinn stops abruptly before running into him.
"I got you these." Joel hands her flowers.
"Oh they are nice, thank you." He smiles shyly. Quinn reaches up and kisses Joel on the cheek. She run to the kitchen putting them in a vase then comes back out.
"I thought I was gonna pick you up?" Quinn questions carefully.
"I am not gonna climb into that tiny excuse of a car." He states playfully. Quinn stares at Joel's attire.
"You know I said dress casually." She says while looking at a nice button up shirt and a lose tie.
"I am, I dress to impress." Joel shows her, his pearly white teeth." Shall we go" Joel asks Quinn.
"Yes sir." Quinn loops her arm through Joel's as they head to the car.
Santana drives around town searching for Brittany. Where could she be. I've checked the park, the zoo, everywhere. Santana pulls up the duck pond and gets out of the car and walks around. Santana sighs as she sees no sign of Brittany. Santana rests her head on the steering wheel as a familiar song comes on.
Wake up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy, I got my glasses, I'm out the door, I'm gonna hit the city.
Realization dawns upon Santana as the familiar song plays through her escalade. Santana texts Elise back letting her know she found where Brittany and thanks for looking out. Santana speeds through town to get to Julliard where Brittany must be. Santana was astonished by the lack of blue lights behind her as she pulled in only moments later. Santana dashes out of her escalade hoping Brittany was in the dance studio that Santana knew. Music reaches Santana as she draws near the door.
Something always brings me back to you , It never takes to long,
Santana peeks through the open door of the dance studio and sees Brittany slowly, deliberately dancing alone. Santana could almost see the outline of Brittany's phantom partner. Brittany's eyes seemed locked onto her invisible partner as she began losing herself as she flew and spun across the room.
No matter what I say or do
I'll still feel you here till the moment I'm gone,
you hold me without touch, you keep me without chains,
I never wanted anything so much then to drown in your love and not feel your rein
Santana was at a loss of words to describe the beauty of the emotion and vulnerable that Brittany was dancing with. Santana could feel the tethers that the phantom uses to constrain Brittany at arms length, never allowing Brittany a moment of unbridled freedom. Tears begin to form in Santana's eyes as she begins losing herself in the perfection in which Brittany performed.
Set me free, leave me be, I don't wanna fall another moment in your gravity, here I am and I stand, so tall just the way I'm supposed to be, but your onto me, all over me
Santana covers her mouth to catch the gasp that desperately tries to escape. Brittany threw herself even deeper losing herself completely. This isn't a dance, this is how she feels. Her movements scream explanations as her face whispers truths. Santana's thoughts searched to make sense of what she was witnessing Santana felt like an interloper as Brittany revealed her innermost thoughts and feelings. Santana knew she was seeing intimate details about Brittany that she had lost the privilege to. Brittany collapses on the floor in exhaustion as the song comes to a conclusion and Santana released the breathe she'd been holding.
"That was beautiful" Santana says while opening the door. She takes tentative steps towards the love of her life. Brittany's eyes shoot up to Santana instantly showing surprise from her red tear eyes.
"Thanks," Brittany mumbles as she used her right hand to wipe the tears from her eyes. "What's so special about her? I don't understand." Brittany asks her voice breaking.
"Nothing. She was nothing. She is nothing." Santana takes another slow step towards her. "I messed up Britt, I never meant to hurt you." Santana bites her lip while noticing the broken look on Brittany's face. Brittany leapt up suddenly and raced over to Santana and begins beating her fists against Santana's chest.
"I didn't do this, she wasn't just there, she means something to you." Brittany's blows weaken with each word that leaves her lips. "I saw you two, I'm not the bad guy! You're not an unhappy prisoner." Brittany collapses to her knees sobbing uncontrollably her fists against Santana keeping her from falling on her face.
Santana falls to her knees and wraps her arms around Brittany in a tight embrace. "You mean everything to me Brittany" Santana says softly "I would never intentionally hurt you."
Brittany half heartedly tries to shrug Santana off. "I don't like feeling this. You messed up. I shouldn't blame myself because you couldn't keep your hands to yourself." Brittany buries her head into Santana's chest as she continues to sob. "Am I not causing you so much pain you can't help but lash out? Are you so neglected that anyone who shows you attention is a threat?" Brittany's voice is barely a whisper.
"I was jealous Britt. That's not an excuse to do what I did, but I messed up and I just want to be with you. Not Elise, not some random girl. Just you Brittany Susan Pierce." Santana tightens her hold on Brittany and slowly begins to rock her back and forth. " It's gonna be ok. We are gonna be ok." Santana says soothing words into her hair.
Brittany reaches up and puts her hand gently on Santana's face. "I just want all the pain to go away." Brittany mumbles so Santana has to move in closer to make it out.
"I want you" Santana says putting all her love and adoration into those three words. Santana stares deep into Brittany's eyes she begins to drown in the ocean blue eyes. Brittany leans in and kisses Santana gently while caressing her cheek. Santana kisses her back softly giving into the moment before breaking away and pushing her back.
"Stop" Santana says while fighting the urge to attack what was once hers. Brittany growls and then her gentle caress becomes a forceful tug. Brittany kisses Santana with animalistic hunger as she tries to drown away the pain that is eating away inside of her.
Santana gasps in shock. She pushes Brittany forcefully away now that she almost falls backwards. Brittany catches her self when Santana stands up abruptly to create space between the two.
"Britt I said stop" Santana's voice now stern.
"You said you wanted me." Brittany says pain dripping from her voice. Brittany buries her face into her hands. "Isn't this what you want?" Brittany's voice takes an edge.
"Brittany I've been telling you I wanted you the past two weeks. What else do you want me to do?" Santana begins pacing trying to figure out where this is all coming from. "I want you not like this. I want you to trust me, to be with me." Santana defensively crosses her arms across her chest.
"I want to stop feeling. I want to stop hurting. I want you to pretend to love me and have sex with me!" Brittany stands up throwing her hands around to emphasize.
"I do love you. Damn It! Why is it so hard for you to see that I love you! That I am in love with you." Santana clenches her fist to relieve some tension from her heart. " I don't want to have sex with you." She rubs her forehead in frustration. "I cant talk to you when your being like this" Santana sighs.
"I'm not asking you to talk to me. " Brittany says pointedly. "If you wont do it, I'll just find someone who will, it seems to work so well for you." Brittany chokes back the tears.
"You know what? Fine go f - f - Fuc- I cant believe you" Santana shouts at Brittany. She stalks out of the room and lets the tears fall when she is away from her. She heads towards her car. Santana climbs in her car and rest her head on the steering wheel as tears fall down her face. "Fuck you, Fuck you, Fuck you" Santana mutters as she bangs her head on the steering wheel lightly. Santana takes her phone out and send Quinn a quick txt.
10:53pm San: Brittany is at Julliard. She needs you.
10:55pm Quinn: OMW!
Gravity-Sara Barellias (Brittany's Dance)