Christmas 2013

Ziva stood in the bullpen of the building that she once called home. It was because of this place and the people in it that she was able to have the life that she now had, a life full of freedom and family. She was standing next Gibbs' desk feeling rather awkward. Though she had a place with the people here, she no longer had one in this room and on this team. They were going through evidence for a recent case and she was quietly observing, offering ideas occasionally. It was Christmas Eve and the snow fell softly outside the window.

Tony gave a heavy sigh from where he was sitting. She looked towards his desk and caught his eye. Ziva suppressed a laugh at the look on his face.

"Ok, lets call it a night," Gibbs ordered from his desk, "this one will just have to wait till after the holidays."

The temporary agent occupying Ziva's old desk for the moment stands up. It is a new recruit that Vance wanted to spend some time training with Gibbs. He wishes them a Merry Christmas and turns to leave, obviously feeling like an outsider.

"So… movie?" Toy asked with a grin that looked like that of a five-year-old on Christmas morning. The team had decided to turn last year's movie in MTAC in to a tradition.

"I'll go get Abby," McGee said heading to the elevator.

A look came across Gibbs' face. He looked up in the direction of the director's office, stood up, and silently walked up the stairs.

"I wonder what that's about…" Tony mused in the now empty office except for him and Ziva.

"You might not want to know…"

"Very true," He responded with an absent minded shake of his head as he thought back to past events. His eyes focused back on her, "So… you are about to be a college freshman… excited?"

She met his gaze and laughed, "I feel that I will be the oldest one in every class."

"Probably," he said with the same mischievous look in his eyes, "but I'm still proud of you." His eyes and tone were lightly sarcastic but she knew he meant it.

"So… how is Mairin? Will she be joining us?"

"Yes actually. I just texted her that we were done and she will be here in 15."

"I can not wait to meet her. Perhaps I have some interesting stories that I should share with her." The look on Ziva's face was conniving to say the least.

Tony's face fell a little. Her words had the desired effect on him. She watched him squirm in his seat for a moment.

"Like what?" he asked growing more and more uncomfortable by the second.

She pretended to ponder this for a moment, a small, satisfied smile on her lips, "Oh I do not know… there are so many to choose from…"

"You wouldn't dare," he said, his confidence returning.

Ziva smirked, her eyes dancing. "If you are sure."

His confidence began slipping again, "Would you? … perhaps this was not such a good idea," he said with an almost audible gulp.

"We will see," was her only response.

Easy silence filled the room after their light banter. Tony looked at Ziva and smiled. His voice became very serious.

He leaned towards her, his voice a barely audible whisper, "Can I tell you something?"

"Of course." Worry spread across her face for a brief moment due to the seriousness of his face.

A small smile graced his features and Ziva relaxed. He motioned for her to come closer, his eyes boring in to her. He slowly opened his top drawer and lifted out a small velvet box. Realization hit Ziva the moment she saw it. Her face fell as he opened it to reveal an engagement ring. She quickly composed herself and forced a smile on her face, taking the ring box in to her hands. It was a beautiful ring.

"When will you ask her?" she whispered, doing her best to sound happy for him.

"Tonight, after the movie."

"Here?" If there was anything in the world that she did not want to witness it was the engagement of the man sitting not a foot from her.

"No. I am going to take her for a walk, in the snow, by the Christmas lights on 5th."

Ziva lifted her eyes to his tentatively. "So soon?" she asked, hoping that her question wouldn't be taken badly.

"Yeah… I know it is fast… but she is perfect Zi. She is independent, intelligent, successful, beautiful, funny, loves movies… everything I could have wanted in a woman…. And, you know, I love her… so there is that," he said with a wistful smile.

Ziva closed the little black box and placed it in his hand and covered it with both of hers. "Congratulations Tony," she said very seriously, her voice soft and warm.

He smiled softly at her. It was a genuine smile of someone truly content. Even still there was something about it that was a little sad. He looked into her eyes and she could see that same look, the look that haunted his face for eight years. She reflected everything in it right back at him. She let go of his hand and looked away.

Tony let out a sigh, looking intently at the little box in his hands. "I just hope it goes better this time."

"I'm sure it will Tony, she is lucky to have you," Ziva responded, her gaze still out the window.

They heard the elevator ding and Tony was immediately to his feet. He walked to the elevator as a tiny, thin woman stepped across the threshold. She was quite a bit shorter than him, had very curly strawberry blond hair, and freckles on her nose. She was very beautiful but Ziva would expect no less from him. He guided over toward Ziva to make the introduction.

"Mairin, this is the one, the only, the Ziva David. Ziva, this is the light of my life, Mairin Brennan." He had his right arm draped over her shoulder and he was beaming.

"Hello, I have heard such good things about you. Tony says that you are his best friend," she said with a smile.

"And I have heard such great things about you. It is nice to finally meet you," she replied, matching her warm expression.

She looked up at Tony to find his eyes fixed on the side of Mairin's face. He had this look on his face that she was all too familiar with. It was the look she had seen so often directed at her. Coldness settled at the pit of her stomach. She had never imagined the day that she would see that look directed toward someone else. Over their phone calls and emails over the past few weeks Tony had talked a lot about Mairin. He had told her that he loved Mairin and she had heard it in his voice, sure. But to see it… it was overwhelming. She did her best to continue smiling as she watched them interact. Somewhere in the back of her mind she thought that she would be the soul owner of that look. She knew that she had no right to that look any longer. She had let that look go, or so she thought. It was then that she realized that she would never let that look go, no mater what happened she would carry it with her, always.

I know, don't hate me. I promise I'm not a Tiva hater lol. All I can say is hang in there. Also, this is not my favorite chapter…

Also, I have a thing with name meanings. Mairin Brennan means sea of sorrow, sorrow… That's a lot of sorrow. Lol And if you were wondering, its pronounced May-rin.

Until next time. :D