Standing in the Dark – Chapter Six

One month.

It had been exactly one month since hiatus began. One month since his friends had decided that they hated him. One month since Kendall insulted him. One month since Logan made it clear that he no longer desired to be Carlos' friend. One month since James had started ignoring his presence – acting as if Carlos was an inaudible and invisible ghost. One month since Carlos dropped off the face of the earth to his best friends. One month since the nightmares began.

The same dream plagued his sleep each and every night, granting him only two or three hours of rest each night. Every day he would wake up with tear-stained cheeks, puffy red eyes and a hollow feeling in his chest. The dreams were exactly the same each night. Logan's harsh words echoed in his ears, Kendall's beating left him feeling exhausted, and James' actions broke his heart over and over.

Wait, that isn't true. His dreams weren't exactly the same each night. Every night, the dream would become more real. Logan's infamous quote would become more harshly worded. Kendall's beatings would hurt more and more, even after Carlos woke up. The first thing Carlos did every morning was check to make sure James still slept in the very place he had slept when they first moved into the Palm Woods. But it wasn't only his friends who differed his dreams. Bradley was absent and every dream but the first – and that is what effected Carlos the most. He felt abandoned. Forgotten. Lost.

He hadn't spoken to Bradley Owen since the day they first met. The boy's phone number had been left untouched in Carlos' phone. The Latino had scrolled through his phonebook a few times, gazing at the new contact for a second before continuing on to whoever it was he was looking for. Bradley had made no attempt to contact Carlos either, so the Latino decided it was only a one-time thing. His and Bradley's relationship – whether it be only friends or something more – was not meant to be. And he was fine with that. Hell, he barely knew the guy.

But the constantly reoccurring nightmares had begun to really take their toll on Carlos' body. Dark circles had formed under his eyes that even a week of sleep wouldn't completely erase. His eyes were almost always bloodshot – either from crying as soon as he woke up or from lack of sleep. More often that not, it was because of both those reasons. He was always tired and couldn't do much more than drag himself around the Palm Woods residence. He couldn't even bring himself to slip into the pool, for he had simply lost interest. He couldn't see the fun in swimming by himself – without the company of his three best friends.

He couldn't even find the energy to climb up into his favorite tree in the afternoons, not to mention finding the motivation to photograph his surroundings anymore. Everything was so dull without his friends. The world was an uninteresting place and Carlos found it difficult to do, well, anything, without them. To sum it all up – Carlos Garcia, was depressed.

Not hardcore, suicidal, everyone-hates-me, pity party depressed. It wasn't that bad. Carlos just had no idea how to cope without his friends to guide him. Logan had been right. Carlos was always tagging along with whatever his three friends were doing, but they had never acted bothered by it before Logan said something. Since Carlos had become aware of his friends' feelings towards him, he had made a point to avoid them at all costs. His cries were silent every night, he left early as to not disturb them when they woke up in the morning, and he even refrained from spending a lot of time with Camille and Jo. He didn't want the girls bringing him up in front of his friends. Well… former friends.

"Carlos!"

The Latino groaned to himself as the high-pitched greeting of a very familiar voice pierced the air. Camille. He loved Camille, he really did, but her sudden appearances that would jolt him out of his thoughts were starting to annoy him. They had hardly spoken over the past few weeks, partially because she had been filming on location and because he had pointedly been avoiding her. But it seemed that she had finally caught him.

At that moment, Carlos was sitting at the café down the street from the Palm Woods. He was sitting on the outdoor deck, enjoying the beautiful early summer day. There was not a single cloud that plagued the sky and the sun was hanging just right – not too hot, not too bright. He was sitting alone near the sidewalk, watching nonchalantly as people walked by. He had an iced green tea in hand, sipping at the bright green straw every few minutes, careful to make the drink last. He was always one to finish his drink quickly, so quickly that Logan often made comments about it not being healthy. Well, Logan used to make comments about it. Boy, did Carlos miss those annoying comments.

The sound of the chair scraping beside Carlos told him that Camille had sat down, not waiting to be invited before invading his space. Not that Carlos really cared. As annoying as her sudden appearances might be, it was nice to be in the company of friends once in a while.

"Hey, Camille." He greeted her quietly before taking another sip of his tea.

"I haven't seen much of you these past few weeks." Camille sounded strangely serious. He had never heard her serious like this. It was strange, but he was glad to have someone he could talk to seriously. Most people turned everything into a joke nowadays.

"Yeah… I've been, uh, busy."

Camille rolled her eyes, "No you haven't. You're not as sneaky as you think, Carlos. I know you've been avoiding me. Jo, too. You've been avoiding everyone."

"No, just you two." Carlos responded, not once looking up into her brown eyes,

"Why?" Camille sounded genuinely hurt and the Latino instantly felt a pang of guilt in his stomach. He hated hurting his friends.

"It's complicated." Camille nudged him in the ribs and Carlos sighed, knowing he would have to explain himself sooner or later. He chose sooner, rather than later. "I didn't want you or Jo to bring me up in front of Logan or Kendall. I don't want them to be bothered by me more than they need to be."

Camille frowned and rested a hand on the Latino's wrist, clearing her throat before speaking, "I'm sorry, Carlos. I would beat some sense into each of them if I could. But I can't. I don't know what is going on behind closed doors with them, but I can tell you that it's not good."

Carlos looked up from his drink to meet her brown eyes that were almost identical to his in color. "What do you mean?"

"I was with Logan and the boys beside the pool yesterday. I don't want to hurt you by saying this… but I think you deserve to know."

"Well, spit it out." He urged almost impatiently. Camille looked down at her hands before speaking, voice shaking with uncertainty.

"They were talking about how great it would be without you in the band. James… James said that he couldn't wait until you were gone. It was almost like they were planning a way to… to get rid of you." Camille explained, gazing up at her friend warily, not knowing what kind of reaction to expect.

Carlos stared at the girl in shock, not knowing if her heard her correctly. Deep inside, he knew that he heard her loud and clear, he just didn't want to admit it. Why would his friends want to get rid of him? They had been best friends since Pre-K. Why throw it all away for no reason?

"But, we've been best friends since forever, Camille." Carlos began, closing his eyes briefly before looking back at her, "Why would they want to throw away a lifetime of friendship?"

"I don't know, Carlos. Maybe they're doing it unwillingly." Camille whispered, her voice cracking slightly. Her eyes suddenly widened and she glanced up at Carlos, whose eyes had widened as well.

"Unwillingly? Camille… you know something, don't you?" Carlos whispered in response, staring at her with semi-hurt eyes. Truthfully, he didn't want to know what was going on behind closed doors. But, maybe, just maybe, it wouldn't be so bad.

"No, no, I-"

"Give it up, C. I know you know something. There's no use in hiding it."

The brunette sighed, "Fine. But it's not pretty."

Carlos nodded for her to continue, not knowing what to expect as the girl continued. He could tell from the first word that it was going to break his heart, but he would have to stay strong until she was done talking. Or until he figured it out, that is.

"The pool cleared out so it was just me, Logan, James, and Kendall. They wanted to play some volleyball and I suggested that we invite you. K-Kendall said that inviting you would be a bad idea, " Camille began, her voice shaking, "I asked why and he said because it would be bad for their plan. I guess they could tell I was confused so they decided to explain everything."

"Logan told me that a month ago, before hiatus began, they had a secret meeting with Griffin, Gustavo, Kelly, and the company. They were told that over the past year, ratings and sales have gone down rapidly – because… because of you. They were told that keeping you in the band would only hurt Big Time Rush and that the band would eventually die out if they didn't do something. G-Griffin told them to kick you out of the band."

Carlos' mouth formed a small 'o' shape as he listened to her story. He had always known Griffin to be spontaneous and unreasonable, but this was different.

"They didn't want the devil to be the one to break you heart, so they decided to tell you themselves. But, they couldn't find the right time to tell you flat out. When hiatus started, they saw less and less of you, so they started spending more time together. They told me that they realized how much they…"

"How much they what, Camille?" Carlos pressed, staring at her desperately.

"Please don't make me say it, Carlos."

"Please, Camille…"

The girl looked up into his broken eyes, fighting to hold in tears as he begged her to finish. She sighed and found it impossible to look away as she continued.

"How much they… hated you."

Yeah, I don't like this chapter. It's probably the worst thing I've ever written. But I'm posting it because yolo and I really need to update.

Sorry this chapter wasn't very long. I couldn't figure out a way to make it longer - hehe.

BUT ON A MORE MATURE NOTE, I hope you guys liked it. It's kind of a filler until next chapter, where something really angsty is going to happen. You guys are going to love it, trust me. I'll try to update by Friday, so be on the lookout for that - you won't be disappointment.

So... just like this chapter... this message is really short. I LOVE YOU GUYS THOUGH. REVIEW?

- Carnie

PS: If you think it's confusing or irrelevant or find any typos, please let me know. I'm really tired and blah, so that would help a lot because I probably won't get around to proof reading it for like, a week. Aren't I just a great writer? Ha. ANYWAY, LOVE YOU GUYS. I already said that but who cares? Yolo.