wooohooo finally a longer chapter! that was about time. I think this one is pretty good, though I do feel a bit uncertain about my grammer and I later on changed some things so I hope that there are no mistakes.. hihi oops.

Well I haven't said this before I think but anyways:

Disclaimer: I don't own Once Upon A Time or these awesome characters.. unfortunately XD

Hope you enjoy, and thanks for the reviews so far, I love hearing your opinions.

xx

It was a only a year later when I saw Regina again. I was sixteen and she was twenty. This time I knew I was probably going to see her and I felt nervous but excited. We hadn't heard from each other in that one year, because we never exchanged anything. No phone number, nothing. But I had kept thinking about her, wondering how she was doing. I just hoped she was doing better than I was.

I was partying a lot. Maybe a bit too much. I was a lot wilder than Sophie was all those years ago at that party that I'd rather not think about. I had stopped hating alcohol but was still careful with it. Of course because it was illegal but also because I didn't trust myself with it. I knew what could happen if you went that far and I never ever wanted that. My home situation was nothing like it had been with the Swan family. I had insisted on keeping that name, because I loved them and I wanted something to remind me of them forever. They were the only people that ever made me feel like a family so it would be logical for me to keep their family name. Unfortunately that wasn't happening till I was eighteen. Unfortunately for me. I now lived with families for only one or two weeks tops, they all wanted to get rid of me as soon as possible. I wasn't that bad, I was just messed up and broken I guess. I didn't really talk that much, only to the few friends I had, though they weren't real friends.

But tonight I was going to Boston University for an introduction evening. I had to go in and listen to some person giving me a lecture about how awesome their University is. I didn't want to listen to that but I also knew there was going to be a party afterwards. One of my friends had asked me if I was going. First I really didn't want to. I had school the next day and my grades were already bad and if I wanted to go to college next year I really had to start to do something. I had been a smart kid and skipped some classes but now things were harder since I wasn't putting in the effort anymore. My friend had texted me the list of people that were coming. I remember my heart skipping a beat when I saw Regina's name on the list but I should have known it actually. I mean, she does go there.

"Why are you so overexcited about this stupid party." Zooey said to me on the phone. I sighed as I started fidgeting with my own fingers.

"Just.. it seems like fun." I responded, hoping she would buy it.

Zoeey was two years older than me but we were in the same class. I met her when I moved to my next foster home and family. She was in one of my first families but I had insisted on staying in the same area so I could still see her regularly. They didn't do that normally but realized that I had gone through enough already. Zoeey was okay, I guess. We talked a lot but the only thing that seemed to interested her were guys and finding me one. What she didn't know was that I had a girlfriend. I never told her because I knew she would end our friendship immediately. I know I shouldn't even be friends with these people but there weren't many others that I could depend on. Expect for my girlfriend Lexie of course but didn't want to dump all my shit on her.

"I know, I told you that weeks ago but you said that you really needed to get good grades or something." Zooey said, annoying me. Why couldn't she just let it go.

"I don't know.. okay.. I just wanna go." I said, rolling my eyes because I knew she couldn't see me.

We said our goodbyes after that. I was slightly nervous about Zooey coming tonight because I didn't want her seeing me with Regina or anyone.

I asked Lexie to join me to the party but she said that she had to go to someone else's birthday, which could be a lame excuse but I wasn't going to ask her that, so she said she's going to join me the next time. I was a bit disappointed because we didn't get to see each other a lot but I couldn't force her to come with me. Lexie was great and I really didn't want to mess things up between us and also we would have to be pretend to be just friends in front of Zooey the entire night, which also wasn't much fun and Lexie was already complaining about that a lot.

I met Lexie in my third new foster family. I was sitting at a lunch table by myself at that time and I noticed her almost every day. She always caught my attention. At that point I had just realized that I might be somewhat interested in girls more than boys. If I look back at my life I should have known it sooner. There were a lot of pretty girls in school but Lexie was by far the most beautiful one. Her short playful brown hair and dark eyes looked stunning on her and she had the most amazing smile. I kept wishing that someday it would be directed towards me. And that wish came true sooner than I had expected. She was crying one day and sat down at my usual table. When I arrived I slowly sat down next to her .

"What's wrong?" I had asked to which she shrugged. She was clearly not in the mood for talking right now.

I didn't really know how to react at that moment because I had never been really good with crying people and saying the right things at that moment. I wasn't good with words, action was my thing. So I shifted closer to her and carefully put my arm around her. To my surprise she immediately wrapped me up in a tight hug. I was startled but stroked her back and whispered that it was going to be okay.

After that she had told me that she had been in a fight with one of her best friends and even though I couldn't give her much advice, I was able to cheer her up. We clicked immediately and decided that we should totally hang out, we could be great friends.

Two weeks later we were dating.

Anyways, Lexie wasn't coming to the party so it looked like it was just going to be me and Zooey.. great…

"So… are you excited?" Zooey asked me as we walked across the campus. I shrugged.

"Kinda. I guess." I tried to sound as calm as possible, though that wasn't how I felt. I felt really nervous even though I didn't realize why. I had tried to convince myself that it was because this was a new party, with mostly older and new people. No, it had nothing to do with seeing Regina again. Absolutely nothing.

Zooey ignored me and instead pointed at some guys standing next to the entry.

"They're realllllllly cute!" She said happily and started yanking on my arm, trying to get me to walk faster.

"Urghh do we really have to go to them?" I asked slightly annoyed as I tried to get my arm back.

The blonde ignored me and dragged me towards the group.

I felt extremely uncomfortable the second that we entered their little circle. I felt their eyes moving over my body to check me out and it made me feel very insecure. I was wearing a dress again, Zooey had forced me into wearing one, and it was really a bit too short since I was taller than her. It was black and the front had a really low cut. A bit too low actually. My hair was down again and it had only grown longer in the past year so now it reached halfway across my back, curling playfully. I knew I looked great but I felt so judged by their eyes.

I caught one of the guys smirking and poking another guy to look at me. I could barely hold back an eye roll.

"Hi guys! My name is Zooey and this is my friend Emma." She said enthusiastically as she was practically jumping up and down. I thought that she didn't like this party?

I just waved awkwardly at them. "Hi…"

Zooey shook her head at me, disappointed in my bad flirting skills, and focused on them again. "Anyways, Emma doesn't have a boyfriend but she really wants one.. so…" She then decided it was a good moment to leave us alone and turn away.

I ended up talking with them for fifteen minutes before I finally managed to escape them. With a bad mood already I finally walked inside, freezing because it was cold outside. I started looking for Zooey and found her pretty soon, dancing on the bar. I sighed and walked towards her.

"Zooey, please come down." I begged as I yanked on her skirt. How could she already be so drunk. I was gone for only fifteen minutes.

"Em! This is so much fun! Join me!" She tried to grab my hand but I took a step back and shook my head. Why did I always have so much trouble with drunk people.

Instead I went to the bar and ordered a drink myself, I hadn't planned on drinking alcohol tonight but this party had barely started and I already felt like crap so I really needed that drink.

About thirty minutes later I realized that I shouldn't have done that. Zooey kept bringing me free drinks and I had kept drinking them while I had to keep pushing this annoying dude away from my body. He was really starting to annoy me but I was a bit too tipsy to think of another way than physically pushing him away every time. Maybe if I hadn't accepted those drinks I would have been able to say something to him that would scare him away but no.. here I was tipsy, almost drunk, dancing and pushing a stranger off of me. I hadn't seen Regina yet, although I have to admit that I also haven't searched for her yet. I want to see her, I really do but I don't want to seem to desperate. I can have a good time at a party without having to see her, I had to show that to myself.

"No…" I said softly as I pushed him once again. This time it was harder and he didn't seem to like it. He came back immediately and forced himself on me. He grabbed my neck and brought our faces closer together. "Stop it." I said as I pushed him away once again.

"Why? I know you don't have a boyfriend or something. What's wrong with you?" He looked at me in disgust. I suddenly felt really vulnerable. He had broken something inside with that comment. That was a question I had asked myself a lot over the years. "What's wrong with me? Why does no one want me?" it was the question that every foster kid had and him saying that right now was too much. I opened my mouth to respond but an arm wrapped around my body and squeezed my weight. I thought it was Zooey and sighed at the thought of having to deal with her right now too. But then the person spoke.

"There's nothing wrong with her. She's my girlfriend." My head shot up immediately at the voice and I looked into her eyes. Regina's eyes. The familiar eyes. I realized that I no longer had to look up at her, we were the same height now. I had grown a lot in the past year and it was nice to finally be at eye level with her, you would almost forget about the age difference too. Her hair was up in something, I don't know, something messy but it looked really cute with some of the curls escaping. I smiled at her, and mouthed a 'thank you' for the rescue.

I raised my eyebrows at him as to dare him and then we started to turn around and walk away. Just as I felt the grip on my waist loosen up the guy stumbled back to us and grabbed my shoulder, forcing us to turn around.

"Hey why can't you just leave us alone?" Regina said. Wow, she had really grown confident in the past year. I mean, she always had been but it seemed even more now. I couldn't smell any alcohol on her so I was glad that I had finally someone to trust.

"I don't buy it." He said to which I shrugged.

"Who cares?" I said as I stared at him.

"Just admit it." He said to us. "Admit it. This is again some silly fake act just to get rid of me, you bitch." He seemed really pissed now and it caught the attention of a few others around us. I noticed that Zooey was next to me, staring at me with her eyes wide. She had never seen Regina and I had never told her about her so she must have no idea what the hell was going on.

I opened my mouth and moved my arm from around Regina, ready for attack but she quickly pulled it back and turned me around on my heels, so that I was facing her. I gulped in surprise but before I could react she pressed her mouth to mine.

I had no idea what I was feeling, only that it were a million feelings at one. I was like all of the loneliness and feeling of rejection was torn out of me by this simple kiss. I had never been kissed before because Lexie wanted to wait (I had no idea why, she could be so hard to read sometimes) so it took me some time and a pull of Regina on my hip before I realized I had to react to it. Slowly, but carefully I started moving my lips over hers. She slightly bit on my lower lip and I realized that I had never felt better in my entire life.. If every kiss felt like this, I had no problem with being kissed every day for the rest of my life.

It never felt like that again.

Slowly Regina pulled back and she looked at me really lovingly. I didn't know if she was faking it or if it was real but the guy was staring at us with his mouth open. I chuckled and blushed slightly, which was sort of out of character for me and let go of Regina. Zooey was just standing there like she might pass out any moment but I ignored her and instead opened my mouth to say something to Regina. But before I could, Steve, stupid Steve, came running towards us and I could hear Regina mutter 'shit' before she looked at me apolitically and let herself be dragged outside by an angry looking boyfriend.

I wanted to follow them but Zooey stopped me.

"What the hell was that?" she asked me, somewhat irritated.

"Just an old friend helping me out." I said as if it was nothing, even though my heart was racing.

"That sure didn't look like that." Zooey said as she argued with me once again. Why couldn't she just leave things alone sometimes, she always had to interfere. I was happy to have her, honestly, but sometimes she would just drive me crazy.

"Please just leave it." I said as I started to walk towards the exit, looking for Regina. I had never liked that Steve and had the feeling that Regina also felt really trapped in that relationship.

"No! No I won't. Not until you tell me what's going on!" The blonde insisted but then I turned around and really looked her in the eye.

"I said leave it. Mind your own business." I hissed to her before I left her all shocked and walked to the direction of the exit.

It took me ten minutes before I finally found them. I approached them slowly, not wanting to disturb them really, I was just checking out on Regina. They were standing by a tree and it looked like Regina was crying, which made me feel protective all of the sudden and I felt the urge to punch the guy. Could be just puberty though.

They were talking loud but I still couldn't hear the words so I moved closer. I sat down behind another fallen tree on the ground and looked at them. I felt like an idiot but told myself that I was doing this for the sake of another human being, I was doing something good.

"You bitch, you never listen to me." Steve said to Regina which made my anger boil even more. How did he dare to talk to her like that.

"Steve, it didn't mean anything. I told you." Regina responded which made me feel somewhat sad but I reminded myself that it wasn't about me.

"I don't care. You're with me. You are mine and mine alone and you listen to me. That's how it works. That was what we discussed but then why do you keep going out with your friends so often. Why do you never let me know when you'll be back and stop acting like you're not into that girl you just kissed. I could read it of your face." He said angrily.

Finally Regina decided to fight back. "You.. Urgh!" She said, clearly not wanting to call him names. "You don't give me any freedom at all. You only force me to do things. You are never here when I actually need you, You've never really been there for me." She snapped out and after some quiet moments she muttered a quiet 'asshole' . I got somewhat scared. She probably shouldn't have said that.

Turns out I was right. "What did you say?" Steve said before he suddenly slapped her right in the face. Regina seemed to be completely taken aback by the sudden attack and had no idea how to react. Luckily for her, I was by her side in an instant and punched the guy. Another thing that I learned in foster homes, punching. I knew where to hit them to really make it hurt.

He looked at me and clutched his jaw. He raised his arm as if to punch me back but I was faster and my knee hit him in his balls. He dropped down on the ground and screamed. Immediately I took the still quiet Regina and dragged her out of the small forest and back to the campus. We sat down on one of the couches and I carefully took her face in my hands.

"Are you okay?" I asked quietly.

She looked at me for a few moments. The softness and vulnerability in her eyes was something I hadn't seen before in them. It was like walls had disappeared and she was completely open. For me, she couldn't have looked more beautiful and it didn't even matter to me that I had a girlfriend because at that moment I realized that the strange feeling that I had always had for Regina had turned from hate into something entirely different.

It seemed like she had noticed it too because all of the sudden I could see the emotion shift in them and it was like the walls were being build back, brick by brick. They became cold again and I frowned. She cleared her throat and removed my hand of her face.

"You shouldn't have done that." She said bravely.

"Regina, he punched you." I shot back at her, wanting her to be the same person from minutes ago again, the real Regina, not this bulletproof vest version. I wanted her to take it off again, because I wasn't going to let the guns fire at her. But it seemed like Regina was too scared to get hit again.

"I was fine handling things on my own." She stated as she avoided all eye contact now. It was really starting to annoy me.

"No you weren't." I responded to her. I wasn't going to give in this easy. Regina really had to realize that she and Steve were over. They had never worked and they never were going to work. He had this crazy grip on her heart and I thought that this punch would have turned things around for her but it seemed like she still didn't see it.

Regina only sighed in frustration at me. It took some minutes before she finally spoke again, her voice even more cold.

"Miss Stevens, you need to mind your own business." I had no idea where the formality all of the sudden came from but when I tried to look at her she only looked straight ahead.

"Regina.." I tried but she wasn't having any of it.

"Go." She said and then she finally did look at me. "I don't want you here anymore, nobody wants you, Miss Stevens."

The comment felt like a knife to my heart. She had rejected me with the exact same words that she used all those years ago, making me relive the pain all over again. Tears pricked in my eyes as I stood up and looked down at her.

"Whatever. " I said, copying her goodbye to me from years ago, for about a second I could see the pain trying to break through the walls but she wasn't letting it.

The tears were now really on my cheeks but I wasn't trying to hide them. Nothing could make this worse. I quickly walked away from Regina.

"Goodbye, Emma." She whispered when I was long gone.

Srry for messing things up again. Don't worry I'll fix it again. Let me know what you thought.

and btw.. urghhh don't we all just f*cking hate Steve haha :)