A/N: I know, late update... I got writer's block on this one, but I'm over it now. This chapter is little longer than usual, so I hope thamanages it up for a delay :)
Suddenly, Dexter found himself standing in the kitchen. He didn't know what time of a day is (although it was obviously day time), what is he doing there or how did he get there in first place. He looked around, and shockingly enough, he saw Harry sitting at the kitchen table, looking at him.
Oh, great, he thought. Another conversation.
Usually, he liked dreaming about talking with Harry-hewould often made him feel close to Harry and sometimes those dreams would even provide him some great advices-but lately, his dreams involving Harry were mostly focused on the recent... weird situations between him and Debra and they would only concern him or frustrate him more.
He sighed heavily and looked Harry in the eyes, waiting for him to start a conversation, knowing that resisting or ignoring. Harry realized that, and so he spoke.
"You are changing", Harry said in his usual calm, steady tone of voice.
"I don't think so", Dexter replied. He wanted to say something in sense "You are wrong, I don't agree", but he simply couldn't. He couldn't deny Harry's claims, not so harshly.
"You are changing, Dexter, believe me."
"For better or worse?"
"It depends which way you look on it. But you can't stop the change, no matter is it good or bad change."
It was obvious from that point on: this conversation was about him, again, and about Debra, again-about him and Debra, again. Harry didn't even mention Dexter and Debra during that conversation at that point, but Dexter already knew, or at least had pretty good idea, about the topic of the conversation. So he said the very first thing that crossed his mind.
"How can you be so... supportive about this whole situation? Debra is your..."
"I just want the best for both of you. I want you two to be happy."
Dexter smirked. Happy? Happiness? He never even thought about that. Is he happy? Can he be happy? He can't feel emotions, so can he be happy? Do you need emotions to be happy? Is Debra happy, after everything she's been through? After everything they're been through?
"And you think that I am not happy? And that Debra is not happy?", he asked, still trying to wrap his mind about the whole happiness thing.
"You are not happy, Dexter. Satisfaing your urges doesn't make you happy. And Debra isn't happy either. She claims that she doesn't suffer because of what she did to Maria anymore, and maybe she doesn't, but she is not happy. She is confused and scared, and she is holding on to you, because that's the only thing she has left."
Dexter took a deep breath. This felt incredibly weird, he could barely believe that this whole thing is happenihg. "I can barely recognize you anymore", he couldn't help but notice. "We never had this kind of conversation. Not when you were alive, not after you died, and now..."
"Maybe I'm changing too."
"You know that I don't believe in change. Especially not after all these years. I am a realist, and I always way. I don't have false hopes. That's useless and irrational and stupid. After all these years of living... on a way I live, I know that. With all due respect, I know that."
Harry sighed, looking down at the floor.
"I can't blame you. I thought you too..."
Suddenly, he found himself standing in the bathroom. He looked adound. Nobody was there... except for Deb. She wore nothing but a white bathrobe, that was hardly even covering her long legs covered with smooth, flawless skin. Her long, brown, now wet hair, was falling down her back amd chest. She smiled. And then, slowly, she started walking toward him.
"Debra? W-what are you doing here?"
"I'm using a bathroom, Dexter", she said, playfully, still walking toward him. "What are you doing here?"
Dexter opened his mouth, trying to say something, but soon he realized that he can't provide any rational explanation. That didn't stop Debra, who continued walking toward him. And she didn't stop till she was standing barely few inches away from him.
But she didn't answer. Instead, she moved her face closer to his. He coukd clearly feel her warm breath pressing against his skin, and he shivered. Look in her eyes... she didn't seem to be bothered by what she was doing, or ashamed, not even a little uncomfortable, not a bit. But still, her eye sight wasn't cold, or meaningless, there was look in her eyes-the look that looked like, no, was, without a doubt, both wonderful and dangerous in the same time.
Before he could resist, she pressed her hands against lower part of her stomach, so strong that he could almost feel her fingertips pressed against his skin, despite the fact he was wearing a shirt. He felt that well known shivers again, starting in lower part of his stomach and slowly moving down... Her eyes were still focused on his face, her keeping an eye contact with him, but like she knew how he feels and what is going on down there, she smirked.
"Debra... I..."
His words echoed in the empty house. He didn't know why he even tried to say anything: he knew for the very beginning that there is no use.
"Shhh...", she whispered. "Don't talk. You think too much. Just... relax..."
Dexter woke up covered in sweat, his hard-on tenting his boxer shorts. He kicked bed sheets of himself in anger and sat up in bed, running his hands down his face.
Those dreams... they were-they were supposed to be-disgusting, and disturbing, and all the wrong things, but they felt so right for him, so right that he hated to admit it.
Of course... he could never... while thinking about her... although, he started Seriously thinking about that lately. Maybe if he gets release, maybe dreams will stop and then.
No. It's better not to think about that. He needs to concentrate on work, and Harrison, and his... projects and it will pass. It needs to pass. No matter what Harry says.
He shivered, suddenly realizing that he didn't agree with something that Harry said. He never did something like that. Soon, he scoffed at the idea. It was his idea, not Harry's. Thinking that Harry's ghost is appearing in his dreams was ridicilous. It was his idea, announced in form of Harry, his father and former mentor, in his dreams. And people have right to change their opinions, and ideas.
But, can they change their feelings?
Probably not, but luckily, he can't feel any.
He carefully walked toward the bathroom. Doors were closed. Luckily, Debra wasn't in there. After he used a toilet, brushed his teeth and took a shower, he walked in the kitchen. Debra was already there, sitting at kitchen table, reading case file. There were few others laying on the table too. Her breakfast-bowl full of cereal and milk, with spoon aside-was also on the table in front of her-he noticed that she barely ate any. She didn't even notice he walked in the kitchen.
"Good morning", he said.
She raised her head and looked at him, trying to smile.
"Good morning", she said.
"You are already here..."
"Yes. For about an hour... or two... or three... I really wasn't paying attention on time." She closed the file and put it aside. But, I guess since you're here, it's aboit time to get ready for work. I'll be right back", she said, before standing up and heading toward the bathroom.
After she left, he picked up one of the case files from the top and opened. Just as he assumed: it was about latest double murder cases. He sighed, closed the file and put it back, then started making himself breakfast.
Now he really wanted to find that guy and kill him. Case affected Debra really badly, and she didn't deserve that. She had enough problems few months ago. After everything he caused, after he made her kill LaGuerta... it was time for him to help her, to do something for her. Unfortunatelly, he didn't get any closer finding that guy than Debra.. Modus operandi didn't match to any violent offenders in the area. He followed some of those offenders whose modus operandis were the most similar to murders, but he didn't fibd any strong evidence that either of tem is the killer. And he couldn't risk killing somebody he isn't sure is guilty. That would be against the code.
As far as he knows, as far as they know, it could be anyone: guy next door, janitor they see every day at the police station, guy who delivered him and Debra Chinese food last night... He could be under their noses all long. And since he killed a male person during his last kill, anybody can be next, and it can happen anytime.
One killer and thousands of potential victims.
Dexter suddenly felt cold shivers running down his spine, suddenly realizing how horrifying that theory-no, fact-sounds. It even makes him feel uncomfortable, and also keeps reminding him how hard it is to find that guy. He can only imagine how Debra feels.
"I'm all done."
Dexter frowned upon hearing Debra's voice behind himself. He turned around and saw her standing there, dressed in her work clothes.
#
They were both assigned to visit scene of a crime almost immediately after they got on work. It was in the same time stressfull and reveling. Stressfull mainly for Debra, because every time when they would inform them about murder in town, she was afraid that killed again. It was stressfull for Dexter too, for same reason, only he didn't actually cared about murders itself, they were only making him angry because Debra was always stressed out about them and because every new murder attributed to was just new reminder about his failure to track down that son of a bitch. On the other hand, it was also reveling for both of them, because it was giving them something to do and help them not to think about Miami butcher for a while.
Even before they made it to a scene of a crime, it was made clear that that murder is completely unreletated with Miami butcher case. Since he, at that point, already killed both male and female victims by stabbing and bludgeoning, and since Dexter was also called, meaning that there needs to be at least some blood on crime scene, they both concluded that victim was probably shoot.
And they were right. They drove there quick, together with pathologist, and as soon they walked in, they got pretty good idea about what happened.
Murder took place in one of the small local stores, just few miles away from their workplace. Victim, Hispanic man, judging by his uniform an employee or an owner, was laying flat on his back on the floor, behind the counter. He was shoot in the face. There was blood everywhere-on the counter, on the wall behind him, on the floor-and his face was barely recognazible. Only other people there were Hispanic woman, that appeared to be in a distress state, and young patrole officer who was standing next to her. As soon as he saw them, he walked toward them,
"Victim is thirty nine years old Richard Gonzales, owner of the place", he said in a silent whisper. "His wife, Juliana, found him. They live upstairs, they hold the store here. At about seven thirty am, she went upstairs. She heard a gunshot and ran downstairs. She found him dead, killer already fleed the scene. Money from cash box was gone."
"Is she... sure that victim is her husband?", Debra asked, glaring at the body with bashed face.
"She recognized his uniform, wedding ring, wrist watch, scar on his left wrist and tatoo on his right shoulder."
"It seems that he was shoot", Dexter concluded while looking at the body and, more important, blood splatters on the wall. "Balistics will determen with what kind of gun, but based on some other crime scenes, I would say Magnum .44, most likely."
"Body is still warm", pathologist concluded. "He was killed about half an hour ago tops."
"That matches the wife's story", Debra agreed.
"There are no defense wounds", pathologist noticed. "And it looks like he was shoot only once."
"Killer was quick", Debra concludes. "And he also had enough time to stole all the money from the cash box." She looked toward securirty camera on the roof. "Before we leave the scene, I will take securirty camera tapes. And now, I'm going to speak with victim's wife."
After pathologist finished his work, Dexter got on his work: studying, measuring and photographing the blood splatters, taking multiple swabs of blood, Sometimes, he would glare at Deb, who was talking with victim's wife. Somehow, he couldn't help but to wonder... how does Debra feel? Is she more relaxed and happier, just for a moment, because she is not working on something related to Miami butcher, or this whole situation only makes her feel more depressed and stressed out? She was turned with her backs toward him and she was standing about five feet away, so he couldn't see her facial expression or anything that could at least hint him hiw she feels. She was holding notebook and pen in her hands, talking with Juliana and occasionaly writing notes. Her actions seemed steady, professional. He couldn't even hear her voice clearly.
Suddenly realizing that he was basicly staring at his sister for whole minute, he shook his head and got on work again, doing his best to concentrate.
What is happening to me?, he thought. Sure, him caring about Debra wasn't something new-she was his sister, one of the few persons he cares about, he always cared about her-but this seemed too much. Like something he never felt before, more than anything he ever felt toward her before, more than anything he felt toward anyone before.
But again, he thought, maybe it's simply one of those days. After all, both he and Debra are under lots of stress lately.
It's nothing, he thought to himself while finishing his work. It will pass.
Soon enough, few other forensic techs arrived and started powdering the crime scene down for fingerprints. Two other forensic techs carried the victim's body in the van. They also tested his wife for GSR. Nothing was find.
#
"By position, size and direction of blood splatters, I was able to conclude that Rabdy Gonzales was shoot with .44 calibar Magnum. Killer was around 5'8-5'10 tall."
"Balistic experts confirmed that. But, unfortunately, nothing useful from security camera tapes. They only show masked figure walking in, shooting him, stealing money and fleeing. 5'8 tall, completely dressed in black. We can't even tell was the killer man or a woman." They were talking in a hallway. It's been few hours since they returned from the scene of Randy Gonzales's murder. Dexter hated the fact that he couldn't provide her anything more useful, but he didn't have anything else at that moment. He sat at his desk while Debra continued walking down the hallway.
Soon after, Debra was then approached by a man who was sitting on a bench in the hallway.
"Excuse me", he asked, "how long am I suppose to wait? It was a simple car accident, some damage on my car and nothing els..."
Suddenly, she stopped and looked closely at the man.
That was Neil. Alysha Brando's boyfriend. His hair was shorter and died in brown, but tha was hin. She knew that. She spent so much time looking at his photograph and wondering where is he that she had no doubt about that. And the worst part was, he realized that she knows it.
Neil jumped behind Debra, pulled out a knife and put knife under her throat. Several people in the hallway gasped. Several police officers pulled out their guns and pointed them at Neil. Dexter immediately felt an urge to ran toward Debra and do something, to save her. But he knew that he can't react that way. He may fail and Neil may hurt Debra. He knew that.
"Neil, calm down", Quinn said, his eyes carefully following Neil's every move. "You don't want to do this!"
"You're right, I don't", Neil said. "But I have no other choice."
Dexter widened his eyes. Look in Neil's eyes... Neil didn't seem angry or blood-thirsty, more like scared or even tired. He didn't know is that a good or the bad sign.
"If you didn't kill Alysha, there are ways to proove it", Batista said. "But you need to let Debra go.
One of the police officers managed to sneak behind Neil. He grabbed Neil's right hand and managed to pull him away, tackling him down on the floor. Neil screamed in pain and knife dropped from his hand on the floor. Quinn and Batista ran over to him and arrested him. Debra gasped and fell on the floor, blood rolling down tge cut that Neil accidently made on her right shoulder while he was tackled.
He didn't know how long it took him to get there, but next thing Dexter knew, he was standing next to Debra, pressing a paper towel on her wound while she was still looking around, confused and shocked by what took place. It was the first time he was terrified at the sight of blood. Seeing it rolling out of a woundon his sister's body was disgusting and was causing shivers spreading through his body, but he knew that he needs to be strong, because of her. Like he was three months ago.
#
When they returned home, it was night, eight pm. Dexter walked in first, then waited for Debra to walk in. She walked in slowly, staring blankly at the floor. Dexter was standing next to opened doors for a while, looking at Debra-he didn't know why. But she didn't say anything, and she silently headed for a bathroom. Dexter sighed, closed the doir behind, and paid to a babysitter, who left without asking any questions. Then he locked the front doors, put hozse key on the coupboard by, and sat on the cotch.
What a day...
First, they were at hospital for two hours, till doctor finally determined that wound on Debra's shoulder is "nothing serious". They simply put a gauze over it and said that she can get back on work next day. Next, they returned to police station to hear what Neil has to say, but he was silent for hours, till he finally said that he was arrested few times as juvenile and was afraid that police would charge him for Alyssa's murder, so he fleed as soon as he heard that she was killed. He was hiding at the friend's house. When he caused a minor car accident, he was driving his friend's car, but had no IDs. When asked why he attacked Debra, he said that he panicked and that he wasn't thinking straight. Both Batista and Quinn, who were interrogating him, couldn't help to scoff on that claim. And he also claimed that he is not the Miami butcher. And really, security camera tape from movie theater near his friend's house provided him an alibi for last two killings-meaning that he is not the Miami butcher after all. They can only charge him for assaulting a police officer.
It was really one dangerous, crazy, unusual day. And Dexter wasn't sure how he feels after all. He was angry on Neil, and on Miami butcher because if he didn't killy Alyssa, none of that would happen, but most of all... he was worried about Deb. He could swear that he was never that worried about her, never before. He wanted to fix this whole situation, to comfort her, but wasn't sure how.
Soon, Debra walked out of the bathroom, closing the doors behind. She sat on the couch next to Dexter. Dexter was waiting for her to say something, but she remained silent.
"Debra... are you OK?"
It was a stupid question, of course, and Dexter knew it. But he also hoped that Debra knows what he really means by that. That she knows that that question is his attempt, although not a particulary good one, to make her talk with him, open up to him. To breake that terrible, horrifying silence.
And it worked. But not in a way that Dexter planned.
"Do you really want to know, Dexter?", she suddenly snapped, turning toward him. "Really?"
Before he could answer, she continued talking, trying to hide upcoming shivers in her voice.
"No, I'm not OK, alright? I killed somebody, now some son of a bitch is killing people and Ican't catch him, nobody can, somebody put fucking knife under my throat today, and I have no one to turn to, except for you but I almost never do that because I know that you can't feel emotions or anything and I'mafraid that talking with you will pnly frustrate me more and I will snap and start yelling at you like now although it's not your fault..."
Her voice was becoming weaker with every new word and when she finally finished, she started crying. Even while she was crying, she was barely making a sound: like she continued suffering in silence, like she did a lot during last few months. She was doing her best to avoid making an eye contact with him, and tears were rolling down her face while her hands, foundled together, were shaking.
She looked so sad and angry at the same time. That made Dexter more angry on that guy than ever before. But in the same time, he also felt something else-urge, obligation to comfort her somehow, to make her happy. He wanted to do that right then, right there, no matter what it took.
He moved a little, just a little closer to her, which gave him even better look on her sad, tear-stained face, making that two feelings inside of him increase.
"Deb...", he said. He didn't know why he said it, he just wanted her to look at him, to pay attention at him, to realize that he is there to her, to stop being so sad, so scared.
It worked, partially. She raised her head and looked him in the eyes. Her lips moved a little, like she wanted to say something, but eventually she didn't say anything. She just looked at him, with her big, beautiful brown eyes, waiting, no, beginng for something, something that would comfort her, make her feel better.
In next moment, his lips met hers. Debra's lips were soft, and tender, and warm, and he could feel pressure going away from her body, her warm breath directing toward his lips. And he couldn't help but wonder why didn't he do something like that long time ago.
A/N: I'm still not completely satisfied with this. But, it seems that in Dexter, no big change in character's relationahioships and plot lines happens slowly, it always happens due to some sudden, uncomfortable event. For example, Dexter didn't simply came to terms with idea that Debra deserves and needs to know that he is a serial killer, thought a lot what to say and carefully made that clear. He only admitted it after she caught him killing one of his victims, than became suspicious about his whole self defense story and kept questioning him about that. Dexter's and Rita's relationship didn't turn physical till he didn't get carried away and accidently made a move on her. Also, almost every season ends with some big twist. So, I guess it's somehow in character. Next chapter will be very Debster-centric-no smut, but they will finally come to terms with their feelings for each other. So, stay turned. Also, sorry because there was no Patrick in this chapter, there will be more of him in chapter eleven.