A/N: Thanks for your support on this story. I find it interesting to read that so many people ship Nick/Andy. I am not one of those people, so the story definitely won't be headed into that direction. Sorry if that disappoints you!
I really hope this chapter isn't too OOC. I changed it like three times and I'm still not too happy about it, but it was the best I could do.
XX
Andy didn't see Sam after they returned to the station. She had a short debriefing and she assumed that he had debriefed too, but there was no sign of Sam when she left the locker room.
If she closed her eyes she could still feel his lips on hers. She couldn't let herself go down that road again though. Sam was with Marlo and he was happy.
Besides, they already proved that they didn't work together. If they were meant to be together, things would have worked out the first time. She got that now. She wanted him to be happy, he really deserved that. So she had to let him go. She didn't even know what she was thinking when she thought she could fight for him.
Andy took a deep breath and walked into the cold air. When she was on her way home, Sam's truck stopped next to her. ''Need a ride?'' Sam asked.
She wanted to say yes, but she knew she had to take some distance from Sam. She needed to get her act together again and she couldn't be close to him while she was trying to do that. She knew that one minute in his presence would be enough to confuse he, so she shook her head. ''Just going to walk, it's nice.''
''You're always freezing,'' Sam argued. ''It's really no problem McNally.''
Andy nodded and looked in the direction she was headed. She was a little cold to be honest, but it wasn't that bad. It was still summer so it wasn't freezing or anything. ''I'd prefer to walk, but thanks.''
Sam kept looking at her for a few seconds and then turned his gaze to his steering wheel. ''Okay,'' he said. He looked back at her and smiled faintly. ''You did good tonight.''
''All I had to do was play along with you.'' Andy shrugged. ''Wasn't really a big deal or anything.''
When Sam didn't reply Andy pointed towards the direction she was headed. ''I'm just going to..'' she said.
''Yeah, sure,'' Sam replied. ''Have a good night Andy.''
''You too.'' Andy quickly walked away and was relieved when she heard the truck turn around. She picked up her step and put her hands in her pockets. After a moment she felt her phone vibrating in her pocket. When she saw Nick's name on the screen she answered. ''You doing better?'' she asked.
''I'm fine,'' Nick insisted. ''Did everything go okay? Did you still do the job?''
''Everything went fine,'' Andy assured. ''We went in anyway. Sam took your place. It actually was pretty easy, no trouble whatsoever.''
''You and Swarek together?'' Nick whistled and Andy could picture him shaking his head while he did that. ''That must have been awkward.''
''Wasn't that bad,'' Andy admitted. ''We work well together.'' Andy thought about everything that happened tonight and had to admit that that was true. They were a good team on the job. She knew that he would have her back, no matter what. It scared her how sure she was of that. She had no doubt that he would take a bullet for her. She would do the same thing for him as well. ''You know, we were partners for three years, so I guess we know each other's moves pretty well.''
''Still,'' Nick disagreed. ''With everything that happened, I can imagine that he wouldn't be your first choice.''
As Andy thought about that statement, she came to the conclusion that that was not true. Even after everything that happened between them, Sam would be her first choice to have her back. If she put aside all the hurt, he was the one that she trusted most. She knew that Nick would have had her back too, but he didn't have the same experience Sam did.
Sam always made her feel qualified too. The first weeks undercover with Nick were sort of awkward, both not sure of each other's qualities undercover. With Sam that had never been an issue though. Even when she was just cut loose, he was the one that told her that there was no one that he would rather go in with than her.
He always knew what to say whenever she was scared, worried or confused. Too bad he didn't know what to say when it was the other way around.
''You still there?'' Nick asked.
''Yeah, sorry,'' Andy quickly replied. ''I'm walking home and got distracted by something. You doing okay alone?''
Nick coughed. ''Sure,'' he said. ''I'll be as good as new before you know it.''
''Good, I kind of need my partner back.''
''Admit it, you miss me,'' Nick teased.
''I'm just kind of worried I will get partnered with Price,'' Andy admitted with a grin. ''All though she probably prefers to ride with Dov. I'm pretty sure he's scared of her.'' Nick coughed again. ''You should go to sleep.''
''I've been asleep all night,'' Nick admitted.
''I'll come by tomorrow with soup,'' Andy promised. ''Just try to sleep now and maybe you'll feel a lot better tomorrow.''
''I'll try. Good night Andy.''
''Good night.''
Andy put her phone away again and smiled as she made her way to her condo. She really was happy that she had Nick. Even if her feelings for him were completely innocent, she did value him as her friend.
XX
Sam made his way down the stairs of the station as he watched officers pass him. It was the day after the undercover operation and things were hard. He thought he was stable, but it turned out that he really wasn't stable at all. He thought he could do it, be in a relationship with another person. Turns out he really couldn't.
Well, he could, but it wasn't fair. Not to him and certainly not to Marlo. She deserved better.
Marlo returned to work today. She still wasn't feeling 100%, but like most coppers she decided that she could do her job anyway. Sam spotted her from where he was standing. When she smiled up at him, he forced to smile back.
He walked downstairs and walked towards Marlo. ''How are you feeling?'' he asked.
''Fine,'' Marlo insisted. ''I was on desk duty all day, so that was fun.''
''Frank probably just wanted to make sure that you are really better before letting you work the streets again.'' Sam looked around the station for a while and decided that if he didn't want to be a bigger ass than he already was , he needed to talk to Marlo. ''Can I come over when I'm finished here?'' Sam asked.
''Sure,'' Marlo smiled and leaned in to kiss Sam.
He really didn't want to lead her on and give her the wrong idea, so he decided to give her a heads up. ''Need to talk to you about something,'' he told her.
Marlo took a step back and raised her eyebrows. ''Were fine, right?'' she asked.
Sam knew that 'we need to talk' was a sign for trouble, but he kind of hoped that Marlo would just go home and wait for him. ''We'll talk,'' he said. ''I should probably be another hour.''
''Let's talk now,'' Marlo insisted. Her voice dropped a little and she held Sam's gaze. ''If it's so important, let's talk now.''
''I'd prefer to wait till after shift,'' Sam tried.
''I'd prefer to talk now.'' Marlo walked away from Sam, but signalled that he should follow her. She sat down on one of the chairs that was free. There were very few people around, something Sam was happy about. ''What do you want to talk about?''
Sam swallowed and looked at the floor. His track record with breakups really was kind of lousy. Dumping McNally in a parking lot while it was raining wasn't his finest moment. Dumping Marlo while they are at their workplace probably wouldn't be the best thing either.
Still, she was the one that insisted that they talked here. ''Do you know why I became a detective?'' Sam asked Marlo. His mind was spinning while he was figuring out how to tell her that things weren't working out.
''You've been working the beat for 15 years,'' Marlo guessed. ''It was time for a change.''
Sam thought back to the years he spend in uniform. Those fifteen years in uniform seemed like a long time, but it wasn't like that. Sam had spend a lot of time undercover, so he was never bored. ''It was,'' Sam agreed. ''But it also was because my mind was screwed up at that time.''
He paused for a moment and linked his hands together while he leaned forward a little. ''I guess it still is,'' he continued. ''I just thought that if I would change my life, that things would fall back into place.''
''Like what?'' Marlo asked. ''You aren't making a lot of sense.''
''Life in general,'' Sam continued. ''When Jerry died, I was pissed off at everybody. Because the only person that really knew me wasn't there anymore. There wasn't anybody left I could talk to.''
''I know it's tough,'' Marlo tried. ''But you have Oliver, Frank,'' Marlo paused for a moment and tried to smile. ''You got me.''
It was as if Sam didn't even hear her talk. ''Jerry was the only person that got me. He knew stuff nobody else knows.'' Sam looked down at his hands and then looked up at Marlo. ''I don't want to wake up one day and realise that nobody knows me.''
''You have to let people in if you want them to get to know you.'' Marlo had a feeling about where this conversation was headed, but she was ready to fight.
''I'm not that kind of person,'' Sam informed her.
''You are ending this,'' Marlo guessed.
Sam swallowed again and quickly nodded once. ''You deserve better,'' he promised.
''Shouldn't that be my call?'' Marlo asked. ''I'm fine with taking things slow. I like you Sam, things were good between us.''
Sam shook his head and looked up at the ceiling. ''You think things were good, because I was trying to be what you wanted me to be. I wasn't being myself.''
''What?'' Marlo asked. ''Now it's my fault?''
''It isn't,'' Sam insisted. ''It's my fault. I was trying to convince myself that this is what I wanted. I was trying to tell myself that I am stable now.''
''This is about McNally,'' Marlo guessed. ''I asked you if she was a problem, but you told me that she was in the past.''
Sam looked at Marlo again and shook his head. ''This is not about her, this is about me.'' He sighed and continued. ''Maybe you are right and it's not in the past, but even if it was than this still wasn't me.'' Both were silent for a moment and Sam ran his hand across his face. ''I'm sorry.''
''Me too,'' Marlo agreed. She stood up and put her bag around her shoulder. ''If you change your mind, you know where to find me.'' She didn't wait for a response, but just brushed past Sam. He kept looking at her until she disappeared from his sight.
He stayed in that seat for a few minutes before standing up. In a way he felt lighter, because he knew he did the right thing. He also knew that things became just a little bit more complicated again.
XX
''Nerd,'' Andy yelled. ''Who goes running after they spend an entire day throwing up with a fever?''
''I was feeling fine,'' Nick argued. ''Besides, I was in bed for the entire day yesterday. So I'm sorry if I thought I needed a little action.''
''You could have just gone to work and get some action there. But judging by the way you look now, I doubt that will happen.''
''Are you saying I'm not looking pretty?'' Nick grabbed Andy's hand and pulled her towards him. ''You like me sweaty, admit it.''
Andy smiled even though she felt slightly uncomfortable. ''First of all, that's disgusting. Second of all, go get in the shower and I'll make you something to eat.'' She watched Nick leave and grabbed some bread. By the time she had his toast and soup ready, Nick was coming out of the shower.
''I'm probably just gonna go to work,'' he said. ''I don't want to take another sick day.''
''You are sick,'' Andy argued. ''I watched you be sick actually, something that I really could have lived without.''
''Hey,'' Nick yelled. ''Who was nice enough to hold up your hair when you had the flu while we were undercover? I even cleaned up when you didn't make it to the bathroom.''
Andy groaned and put her hands in front of her face. ''Shut up I don't want to think about that ever again.'' Andy was pretty embarrassed that day, so she didn't like to be reminded of it.
''I was in the army Andy. I saw a lot worse. Besides it was nice to have you all feverish and rambling. Not that the rambling is a change from how you normally act, but still, you said some interesting stuff that night.'' Nick laid back down on the couch and groaned. He put his hand over his eyes to keep his head from pounding.
''Oh and what did I allegedly say?'' Andy asked. ''Because I'm afraid your fantasy is working over time, that or you are actually delirious.''
Nick removed his hands from his eyes and smiled widely. ''You told me you loved me,'' he said. ''And that you never had anybody better to take care of you.''
''You definitely have a delirium,'' Andy said, faking to be concerned. ''Shall I take you to the hospital, just to be sure?''
''No need,'' Nick assured. ''Just give me the stupid soup and I'll get ready for work. If you're nice I might even let you drive along with me.''
Andy shook her head and crossed her arms in front of her chest. ''You are too kind. Should I remind you that this is the second day in a row that I'm taking care of you?'' she sarcastically replied. ''And you should stay at home, you're sick.''
''If I can manage to run 3K, I can manage to man the desk for a day,'' Nick argued. ''And stop whining, I'm going to make you walk.''
''Hah,'' Andy laughed. ''Like that would happen. I came here fully aware that you would let me borrow your truck if I asked you too. So that ride is not going to be a problem.''
''Wanna try me?'' Nick asked. ''Because I could just make you walk to prove a point.''
''I need my own car,'' Andy muttered.
Nick snorted and threw a pillow at her. ''I'll drive you, just get me my soup now.''
''You know what, since you're feeling oh so good, I'm going to let you get your own soup. It's on the stove, I would like some too.''
''You drive a hard bargain woman,'' Nick said as he stood up. ''It's a good thing I like you.''
XX
Andy made her way to the locker room after Nick had given her a ride to the station. She greeted her colleagues and opened her locker. She quickly started to change. When she was in uniform she started to braid her hair. As soon as she was finished she turned around, ready to walk out of the locker room.
She was just approaching the door when all of the sudden someone slammed into her. ''Watch where you go McNally,'' Marlo spat out.
Andy looked at the senior officer and raised her eyebrow. ''I'm sorry,'' she said. Andy knew that keeping her distance was the best policy with Marlo. She wasn't a bad person, they were just different. ''Are you okay?'' Andy asked when Marlo opened her locker with a lot of force.
''Shut up McNally,'' Marlo said quietly.
Andy had no idea what she possibly could have done wrong. ''Whatever, I'll see you in parade.''
''You couldn't leave him alone, could you?'' Marlo asked when Andy was just about to leave. ''You leave for six months, but the moment you see him with someone else you put your claws back into him.''
''Excuse me?'' Andy asked. She knew that Marlo was probably referring to Sam, but she had no idea what happened. The last time she saw the two of them together they were all happy and touching each other. The memory was still fresh in her mind.
Marlo let out a sarcastic laugh and threw her shirt in her locker. ''We were fine. Then he spends part of a shift with you and all of the sudden he's breaking up with me. And of course he says that it has got nothing to do with you..''
''Marlo,'' Andy stopped her. ''I don't know what happened with you two and it's really none of my business, but nothing happened between Sam and me. We worked together, yes, but that was strictly professional.'' Andy knew that wasn't completely true. They did kiss. And even though that was part of the plan, the kiss wasn't totally professional.
''First Luke Callaghan. Then you almost get Sam killed by sleeping with him. After that you leave for three months and he still takes you back,'' I must say McNally, your reputation really is well known by all of TPS. ''And you would insult my intelligence by saying that nothing ever happened between you and Collins. So it's safe to say that you really get around.''
''Hey,'' Andy warned. ''You have a problem with Sam, you discuss it with him. You leave me out of this.''
''Three years on the job and you already screwed around with three co workers. I hear Frank is setting up a new John sweep. I'll let him know you are fit to do the job.'' Marlo slammed her locker close again and walks away from Andy.
Andy just stood there, her blood boiling. She knew that she didn't have the best reputation, but hearing Marlo throw all of that in her face. That hurt. Part of her wanted to go after Marlo and put up one hell of a fight. She couldn't do that though, because she needed to be professional.
It was bad enough that everybody that worked at 15 knew about her failing romantic life. She didn't need to add any rumors about this. So she decided to be the bigger person and walk away.
''You okay?'' she heard Nick ask as soon as she was in the hallway. ''Did I infect you or something? You look like you saw a ghost.''
''No,'' Andy quickly answered. ''I'm fine. Let's go.'' She walked towards parade with a confused Nick following her. When she walked into the parade room she saw Sam standing in the front of the room. 'Great,'' Andy thought. That was exactly what she needed.
When Sam turned his gaze to Andy, she quickly looked at Nick. She felt sweat forming on her skin. ''God, is it hot in here?'' she asked.
Nick shot her a puzzled look and put his hand on her forehead. ''You do feel warm,'' he stated. ''Are you sure you're alright? You could easily have been infected by me or anybody else here.''
''Maybe,'' Andy agreed. She knew she was fine, but she'd rather have Nick think that she was a little sick than having him know what just happened in the locker room.
''Do you want me to take you home?'' Nick asked. ''If it's the same thing I had, you will really be better off at home. I can talk to Frank?''
Andy quickly shook her head. Sam and Frank started parade so she lowered her voice. ''As long as I'm just feeling a bit hot, I can handle it.''
As soon as assignments were handed out, Andy left the room. She was thankful that she was partnered with Dov. She wasn't sure she would be able to deal with Nick today. She knew she wouldn't be able to ride with Marlo, so Dov was good.
''You okay McNally?'' Dov asked when they were in the cruiser. Dov was behind the wheel and Andy didn't even fight him on it.
''What? Yup, totally fine.'' The entire division just thinks I'm sleeping my way around the station she added in her head. She was humiliated. She knew she didn't have the best track record, but even with that knowledge she never thought that anybody actually felt that way about her.
She spend the entire day in a haze. She was able to be professional whenever they got a call, but she wasn't very social towards Dov. Dov asked her a couple times if she really was okay, but she kept insisting that she was fine.
When she finished her shift she was actually afraid to walk into Marlo again. She really didn't need to hear anything else about what the older woman thought about her. So she skipped her shower and just changed as soon as she could.
She went home, showered, went to the store to buy a bottle of wine and headed towards Traci's. As soon as Traci opened the door, Andy held up the bottle. ''You have time?'' she asked.
''Sure,'' Traci said. ''Leo is away with school for the night. I could use some company.''
''Didn't see you at the station today.'' Andy shrugged off her coat and walked into Traci's living room. ''You had the day off?''
''Yeah, I drove Leo to the place where they are camping. They were short of drivers, so I decided to do something that would maybe convince him I'm not the worse mother in the world.''
''He still mad?'' Andy asked. She knew that Traci was making an effort to spent more time with Leo. Andy also took him for one afternoon and she had to admit that Leo was different now. Jerry's death had affected him, just like it had with everybody else.
''It's better,'' Traci answered. ''Guess it will just take some time.''
''It will,'' Andy promised. ''He's a kid. How is he suppose to understand everything that happened when nobody else can make sense out of it?''
''I guess he can't,'' Traci agreed. ''But things are getting better, so I am positive we'll make it work.'' Traci got two glasses and opened the bottle of wine that Andy brought. ''Not that I'm not happy to see you, but what brought this on?''
Andy groaned and laid down on the couch. ''I'm that easy to read?'' she asked her best friend.
Traci laughed and nodded. ''You kind of are. So what is it? Sam, Nick or all of the above?''
''Neither,'' Andy said. ''Was partnered with Dov all day.'' Andy took a sip of her wine and looked at Traci. ''Do you think I'm a slut?''
''What?'' Traci asked. ''Rewind, what brought this on?''
Andy took another sip of her wine and looked at the floor. ''Marlo called me a whore,'' she informed Traci. ''She was really nice about it too, summed up my entire disaster love life and then told me that the entire division knows about it.''
''She didn't,'' Traci yelled out.
''Oh no,'' Andy corrected herself. ''I actually believe she used the name TPS instead of just 15 division. So that's awesome.''
''What happened?'' Traci asked, still slightly in shock. ''I thought the two of you were on slightly better terms.''
''I thought so too,'' Andy agreed. ''I mean, I wasn't about to invite her to girls night or anything, but we could work together without biting each other's heads off.'' Andy sighed and shook her head. ''Apparently Sam broke up with her. She blames me.''
''Sam broke up with her?'' Traci yelled. ''God, I should have seen that coming. They were talking last night and when he got back he was acting strange. Have you talked to him? What does it mean?''
''It means nothing Trace,'' Andy insisted. ''We didn't talk about anything and we are not going to talk about anything. If I want to be taken seriously at my job, I will never ever ever get involved with a co worker again, ever.''
''Andy,'' Traci tried. ''She was upset and hurt. Nobody thinks you're a slut.''
''Oh, I'm pretty sure people do,'' Andy quickly said. ''How does she know about everything if they don't? She wasn't there when I was with Luke and she wasn't there when Sam and I got suspended.''
Traci cringed a little and filled up their glasses with wine again. ''She seriously brought that up too?'' Traci asked.
''Yup,'' Andy said popping the p. She put her hands over her face and groaned. ''Be honest, you ever heard people say anything about me?''
''Of course there was talk after Luke,'' Traci confirmed. ''But that was to be expected, right?''
''And after Sam?'' Andy asked.
Traci took a deep breath and looked at her best friend. ''You got suspended for sleeping with your former training officer, after you broke off an engagement with a detective from the same division.'' Traci looked sympathetic and shrugged. ''I would think it was weirder if people didn't talk about that. The division is kind of like high school Andy.''
''Oh God.'' Andy took one of Traci's throw pillows and put it over her head. ''Shoot me?'' she asked.
Traci laughed and yanked the pillow off her head. ''Okay, let's be honest for a moment,'' she started. ''You slept with Luke, but you were in a committed relationship with him. I mean, you were suppose to marry the guy, so people can't really call you a whore for that.''
''Okay,'' Andy agreed. ''But that still leaves Sam and Nick.''
''Okay,'' Traci said as she thought about it. ''With Sam it was sort of inevitable. You guys had this tension since day one. And you didn't just sleep with him, you guys dated for almost a year.''
''But he was my boss,'' Andy argued. ''It doesn't look good on me.''
Traci shrugged. ''Most relationships start at work,'' she said. ''And when you guys got together he wasn't training you anymore, so it wasn't a conflict of interest.''
''Do you have any arguments for why sleeping with Nick wasn't a bad call?'' Andy tried.
''Well,'' Traci started. ''You were drunk. Everybody is allowed one drunken mistake from time to time. Besides, you were lonely and hurt. I blame it on Swarek.''
Andy laughed and sat up again. ''Thanks Trace,'' she said. ''I needed this.''
''I know.'' Traci patted Andy's knee. ''Nobody knows about you and Nick,'' Traci said. ''People might have a clue, but they don't know for sure. And let them judge all they want, like they are so perfect.''
''When did you get so smart?'' Andy asked.
''I was born this way,'' Traci bragged. ''It's a gift really.'' Both girls laughed. Traci turned back to Andy and put her hand on her back. ''It's going to be okay Andy. You are a great cop and anybody who can't see that, is an idiot.''
''Thanks Trace,'' Andy replied. ''You're the best.''
XX
A/N: Please review.