Chapter Seven: Under These White Skies
Disclaimer:
Mitsi and Susie Q are sitting on a beach, eating M&M's.
Mitsi: Susie Q, don't you just love holidays? I do… I don't own anything but I love holidays.
Susie Q: I'm not a big fan of holidays…
Mitsi gasps in shock and turns her suntanned face towards her friend
Mitsi: What on earth do you mean by that? What's wrong with you?
Susie Q: Mits, it has been raining her all week long! We're sitting on a fake beach, somewhere in a showroom for beach houses! Why did we have to stay in the Netherlands, anyway?
Mitsi smiles disappears.
Mitsi: Well for one because otherwise I couldn't update. You wanted a looong update so I got you one! Couldn't have done that without my computer, which is in my room, in the Netherlands. Sooo….
Susie Q: Okay, well your right…
Mitsi: I'm always right! And no, I'm not arrogant! Nor am I cocky, conceited or pigheaded! Just stubborn… And me and my stubbornness are going to introduce this new chapter! Which I hope all readers like, please leave this humble writer a review. She really likes that! Oh and yeah; the song used in this chapter had no title, well not a real one anyway. It's the hidden track that can be found on Paolo Nutini's CD 'These Streets', I just thought it fitted. So enjoy this chapter and your holiday!
Lindsay shook out of reverie. A small tear rolled down her cheek. Alex looked at her with his big blue eyes, huddled in the blanket she had draped over him last night. His brown hair was a mess, even though he had tried to comb it with his hands. He lowered his head in shame. Lindsay bit her lip, trying to prevent her tears from spilling. Doctor Hoogendoorn stood up and started walking towards Lindsay. She almost passed her, but put a hand on her shoulder just before she reached the door that led to the Hospital's stairways.
"He'll be alright, just talk to him… Explain the things that I couldn't." She whispered. Her voice might have been calm and soft, but there was a demanding undertone in it. Lindsay turned her head and faced the red-headed doctor. She smiled a tired smile, the doctor took away her hand and strode towards the door. Lindsay faced her son once again, bent over looking towards the cold stone floor that covered the rooftop. She heard the door fall back in its lock again, heels ticking on the concrete stairs. She stood still, wrapped around her body, trying to find words to comfort her son.
When the sounds of the British doctor had faded away, she took a deep breath… She opened her mouth, only to close it seconds later. That happened a few times, while all the time Alex just sat there. He just sat there hugging himself, rocking himself in a soothing manner. She could her a sob every now and then, but other than that he didn't make a sound. Lindsay almost chocked on her tears, but knew she couldn't cry in front of him, just yet. She took an other deep breath and stepped with determined steps towards her son. She sat next to him on the bench.
"Alex," she whispered. She want to make him see that what he did was wrong! She wanted to be angry with him for running away from his father. For leaving all on his own, to sleep on a rooftop. He could have been hurt, for crying out loud! But she knew she could not be angry with her little boy, when she saw those big blue eyes filled with tears. She knew he wasn't to blame. So she wrapped her arms around him, pulled him towards her body and held him. He broke down in tears….
She stroked his back. Stroked his hair. And stroke his tearstained cheeks. She cried too. Alex was always the strong one. He never cried. Rosa always cried whenever she saw the mother of 'Bambi' die in the Disney movie. Hell, it made her cry! Even Danny's eyes watered up. But Alex didn't show any kind of emotion. It wasn't like he did not care, oh he did, but there was nothing really emotional there. And that was Alex: always hiding his emotions. Her ten-year old son was hiding himself and his emotions from the world. He would voice his grief, sadness or pain. But he would never cry…
Flashback
Lindsay stood leaned against the fence of Alex' primary school. She could see him playing with his friends. Rosa, in her stroller, began to fuss. So she bent over and checked on her daughter. There was nothing wrong with her, she was just bored, so Lindsay gave her her favorite toy. Rosa smiled and started playing with her doll. Chattering away in her own language, Lindsay straightened herself and leaned once again against the fence.
Alex' and his friend, in the mean time, were joined by a couple of older kids. Lindsay frowned. The whole ordeal didn't look very friendly in her eyes. That suspicion was confirmed when one of Alex' friends started to cry. Lindsay looked around the playground, trying to find Alex' teacher. But the teacher and her coworkers seemed oblivious to the situation. Lindsay focused on her son once again. Voice were raised, so she could over her the 'conversation' between Alex and what appeared the leader of the older boys;
"Would you please like to leave me and my friends alone?" Alex asked in a calm but unfriendly voice.
"Why would I do that, you pansy?" The older, taller and stronger boy asked. "Are you going to run to your teacher and spill the beans on us?"
Alex simply smiled. "Who knows? I might…" He stepped towards the older boy. It was obvious that Alex wasn't afraid of him. All of us friends were crying, but not Lindsay's son. He was strong, 'a born leader' like Mac had said. But she knew that something was wrong…
"You're not scared of me? Little one, you should be!" The boy laughed and threw his head back. "God, your mother and father must be proud of you! Do you protected them too? From the big bad meanies?" He laughed again. Lindsay could see that Alex was getting angry. Alex didn't cry, but had a really bad temper. And that temper was unleashed when the older boy started talking about his little sister. When Alex heard him mention Rosa's name (the boy lived on the same block as they did, so Lindsay know who he was and he knew her family) he flipped. Big time…
End Flashback
o.0.o
Alex' sobs had diminished, and his tears didn't flow as royally as they had done. Lindsay took his face between her hands and forced him to look at her.
"Alex, what is wrong?" He shook his head at his mother's words.
"Wrong is a bit of an understatement, mum!" He smiled wryly. "He almost died again!" Lindsay could feel the anger in her son's body rise. "When is it going to be over, mum?! Tell me, when is one of you actually going to die?! Huh?" He backed away from Lindsay's grasp and the bench. He stood before her, looking her straight in the eye. Her hands slummed back into her lap and she looked shocked at her son.
"You overheard the conversation between me and the doctor right?" Lindsay nodded. She had heard the whole talk between the two. "Then you shouldn't look so shocked…" He whispered. Alex looked beaten. His eyes were circled with black, and his shoulders were almost touching the ground. She could see that there were more tears gathering in his eyes… "Never will it end, will it?" His voice was so soft it was almost impossible to hear. Lindsay stood up, too and walked towards him. When she stood before him, she fell to her knees. She wrapped her arms around his body once again, and Alex wrapped his small arms around her neck. He lowered his body to the ground too…
"Alex, honey, both me and your father love you. You need to know this, and you do. But we also lover our jobs. And before you make a smart comment about that we should love you more, we do. We would always choose you and Rosa over our jobs. Always. But normally our jobs are not dangerous, you need to understand that too. It is just some cases…"
"Some cases, mum?! SOME?!" Alex buried his head in his mother's embrace.
"Yes, darling, some. Special cases, very special cases, in which someone gets hurt are extremely rare, even if it doesn't seem so to you. What happened to your father four days ago, is rare. Normally no-one gets kidnapped during a investigation of a crime scene. Just some cases… And I know it seems like it always happens to someone on the team, but that's not true. You have to believe that what your father and I are doing for a living is a good thing. We try to make the world a better place for you and your sister. For your future children, if you want them. You have to belief it…"
"I do believe you, mum, but it's so hard seeing you and papa in pain…" Came Alex' muffled reply.
"I know it's hard, baby, it hard for us too…"
o.0.o
Long moments passed. Alex' cries became silent once. Lindsay had stopped crying long ago. A soft breeze started to blow around them. The blue sky was now white, but between the clouds rays of sun shined down on the earth. And there they sat on the ground. Mother and son...
Lindsay started singing a lullaby, in the hope it would calm Alex even more;
I have returned to the northern skies,
Where the summer had not touched
The clouds that pass above.
Oh, and I have returned to the somber grace
Of the days too early to come and too early to stay.
And I have left a million stars, And an ocean so lightly, so clearly blue.
And I have left the warmth of the sun
And a million adventures not yet begun.
The great sense of passing through,
Oh, for once there was beauty here for me
Under these white, northern skies.
I felt the green was blacker
And the blue was darker still.
My roots are lying deeper than I ever think they will again.
Heartache and poverty under these northern skies.
The great sense of passing through,
The great sense of passing through,
The great sense of passing through.
o.0.o
Alex became sleepy, and eventually fell asleep when the song had ended. Lindsay tried to pick up her son, but he was too heavy. He looked like an angel. It was then that she felt a hand on her shoulder that motioned her to stand still. The man picked up her son and started walking towards the door. Lindsay quickly picked up her own feet and opened the door for them. The trio walked down the stairs and Hospital hallways.
They reached Danny's hospital room and entered. Rosa was sitting on the bed, talking to her father. Mac and Stella were watching over her (and Danny, but he didn't need to know that). The man carried Alex over to the couch and placed him on it. Lindsay wrapped an other blanket around his sleeping body, and placed a pillow under his head. Rosa hopped of her father's hospital bed and placed a tender kiss on her brother's brow. The company left the room. Just before the man left, Rosa pulled on the fabric of his trousers. The man came down to her level and looked at her. She placed a kiss on his brow too, and whispered:
"Thank you, Uncle Flack, for bringing my brother. We can be a happy family now…"