PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING STATEMENT!!!!!!!!
Right, there are two versions of chapter 4. The second version is the crazier version that was written at three a.m. with a lot of sugar for company. This version is the more sane version that makes more sense, the second one is crazy. But they share the same ending cause the ending is important to the plot. Okay? Read both… And then say which chapter 4 is the best.
Author/s: Skitts is writing this with Lamatikah –fifty-eight fingered salute-
Summary: They were never a perfect family, but they always tried. Even if trying wasn't good enough… AkuRoku .:RikuxSoraxKairi:.
Disclaimer: I LIKE SUGAR! Just thought you might want to know...
Full Circle
●◦●----------------------Xx
--Chapter 4—
x-A Word From Donald Duck-x
●◦●----------------------Oo
Rikku watched Roxas travel upstairs. He seemed to be travelling a lot happier than usually. She grinned, and followed him upstairs.
"Stop following me."
"I saw you with that girl today."
"So?"
"You look happy."
"So?"
"Do you liiiike her?"
"No."
"Awwww, why not?"
"Because she's not even my proper friend."
"Will she be?"
"Dunno."
"Okay."
Rikku somehow drifted off into the background, as the stairs decided to end as the conversation did. Those stairs scared Roxas, they seemed to be a part of Rikku's brain or something... they would do whatever she said... And it was ... odd, to say the least.
Roxas sidled into his room, Naminé was sitting on her bed, swinging her legs and sketching a picture of someone.
"Who's that, Nammy?" he asked, peering over her shoulder. Naminé blushed and quickly hid her canvas, "Oh I know! It's that... Damned... Damned Hill boy, isn't it?" Naminé pouted as Rikku walked past the door, the stairs must have carried her there, and started to tell Roxas off.
"Roxas! You don't even know Naminé's best friend's name?! It's Denzel and even I know that!" She walked on, or maybe the stairs walked her on... ON AND UPWARDS I SAY!
"Pfft..." Roxas flopped down onto his bed and after a while Naminé could hear heavy breathing coming from the boy. His head was pressed again the pillow and he was muttering something inaudible and unintelligent.
Naminé moved closer, in the vain hope of hearing something worth trying to listen to. Roxas, in his sleep, was cleverer than this though, and turned over so it would be near impossible unless she yanked him round and forced him to speak his dream-talk, but that would just be cruel and silly.
She left him to sleep as Meg called everyone downstairs to have some dinner.
Once she got back upstairs, Roxas was no longer in the room; she shrugged and carried on with her sketch.
●◦●----------------------Oo
Roxas was not a very perceptive person early in the morning.
Of course, nobody is a very perceptive person early in the morning. The hours where the sky is delicately pink and the birds sing sweetly sing their 'get off your fatass you … … fatass…' symphony to wake you up are usually the hours you most wish you'd never been born. Nobody likes hearing a mad mixture of jeering birdsong, obnoxious alarm clocks, enraged mothers and hyper younger siblings all shrieking in your ear for you to 'WAKE UP SLEEPY-HEAD!' or, in the case of the alarm clock, 'BRRRINNNGGGG'. Nobody likes stumbling around their room searing under the bed for the renegade sock on strike or charging downstairs to throw some porridge/bacon/cereals down their throats, choking a few times, grabbing their coats and schoolbags and running out the door, then running back inside remembering to put on their shoes, then running back outside, then getting halfway to school before running back to pick up their books.
Due to mad getting ready for school preparations the morning heralds, along with promises of geography tests and caretakers who trundle around with trolleys, nobody is really feeling their best when they first arrive to school.
Usually the average kid is still tugging a brush through their hair, attempting to clean their teeth, taking a few bites out of an apple, revising for a German test and completing some piece of homework all at the same time as they trundle through the school gates, eyes gummed up with crusty yellow sleep.
So, as we have nicely stated above in a more bite-sized sentence (not that I suppose you really want to take a bite out of my sentences – at this point I feel it necessary to tell you that you are reading these words on a COMPUTER and if you try to bite them you will be left with a very badly chewed-up, sparking piece of technology) 'Roxas was not a very perceptive person early in the morning'.
But even Roxas, in his early-morning stupour, realised that the jolly, good natured 'funfunfun' Mr. Goobadier was the one taking assembly that morning.
He guessed Cid was still staying over at the local exotic resort of 'la hospitalle', free one-way tickets for OAPs. You go in suffering from lung disease and probably never come out.
"Hello classmates! G'morning!" cried Mr. Goobadier, pinwheeling his limbs around in merry circles, succeeding in whacking that 'Shoe' kid around the head as he sullenly crept into the assembly hall, late.
"Oh, Sock!" cried Mr. Goobadier brightly, revealing to everybody in the hall that Shoe's name wasn't Shoe but Sock. Roxas smiled as he made a mental note to remember that name and put it to further use – wouldn't Mindy be impressed when he revealed he knew her friends name! "G'morning. Go take a seat and try to be careful tuh'morro."
Mindy glared at Mr. Goobadier in her rather emo depressive way. She had obviously been taking lessons off her older brother, as she patted the spare section of bench beside her, Sock running forth away from the teacher into a sea of faces and names, to be forever lost to time.
"Anyway, kiddies, I know you normally have Mr. Cid to give you a few wise words bu'fore your day starts, and as I am the most competent teacher here I have been asked tah fill in for 'im. So, today's assembly will be about health!"
Of course, when people talk about health, this generally procures lots of audible groans and inaudible cussing about what a boring assembly it's going to be.
Of course, nobody expected the teacher to link 'health' to 'break-dancing', but whatever floats his boat.
"A great way of keeping fit, healthy and ready tah role is to take up your ruby-encrusted dancin' shoes and dance them extra pounds off," declared the teacher brightly, as he donned his 'ruby-encrusted dancin' shoes' and held up a portable radio he had … somehow … hidden behind his back the whole assembly, even though he had been waving his arms around so much there was no possible way he could have held it behind his back. And his outfit lacked a pocket at the back as well, doubling to the kids' confusion.
Naminé, meanwhile, smiled contentedly – they did it on Scooby-Doo, so why should her seven-year-old-brain ponder that it was impossible to float a radio behind your back?
Damn that Scbooy-Doo and its brain rotting-ness.
"Jinkies!" cried a small girl in Mindy's class, as she sort of techno track started playing from the speaker Goofy had set on the floor, the floorboards shaking along to the 'groovy' beat. Well, of course 'I Love You' from Barney was probably considered cool and funky and techno back when dinosaurs and Mr. Goobadier roamed the earth, but back then all they had was crappy break-dancing, purple dinosaurs and happy songs about hate and violence. So, they had no Groove Coverage or Pink back then. They did, however, have a band called 'Blue'. Later they were all shot by a deranged girl whose name begins with 'L', last letters 'amatikah'
No members survived.
"Look at me! Look at me groove, kids!" screamed the enthusiastic teacher, as he spun around and put his foot into a box of Kleenex tissues that really should have been in the overflowing trash can in the corner. Why it wasn't sitting pride of place atop the throne of rubbish was anybody's guess, but it was not anybody's guess as to what happened next.
No guesswork needed to be involved, as several kids took out their phones and started to record the event that was about to unfold, others quickly running back home to microwave popcorn and then running back in with the popcorn, sitting down and handing it around to the people.
Rikku munched the popcorn Yuffie had magically pulled out of her bag ('always thinking ahead' Yuffie had said, when asked for an explanation, although there was no explanation as to why it was still warm if it had been in her bag about a month) as the music descended into it's most climatic moment (the tape got chewed up and distorted Barney's voice, making it sound like: "love.looooveeee.me.me.i.love.me.you.me.loooveeeee.meeeeeeee')
The rather gormless teacher spun around with the Kleenex box making for a rather 'trendy' foot accessory. However, trendy as it was it was also a safety issue, as the bright lights of the phones blinded him and sent him flying backwards into a wall. Dancing around aimlessly to a slowed down and mixed around rendition of 'I Love You', the teacher somehow managed to upend the bin on his head, smash the whiteboard in two and get the red and yellow markers jammed up as his nose, as he crashed to the ground, defeated and dead. Defeated by his own infernal devices.
A low string of laughing and popcorn munching filled the air, as Roxas sat there numbly and wondered if the best way of being fit and healthy really was pitching ones self into a white board with a Kleenex box on one foot and hoping for the best. He'd have to try it out some time…
"Why is there such a high mortality at this school?" asked Neil, as he and Jane trundled forth from the shadows to pick up the concussed Mr. Goobadier and place him on a stretcher.
He looked around to see if any other kids had died during assembly and weren't lying face down on the floor, or had had heart attacks from the shock. They hadn't – even the kindergarteners had grown so accustomed to all the death that surrounded them they stopped caring and became merciless murdering machines. Complete with egg whisks.
"Don't complain … this crazy school is what keeps us in business," said Jane with a small smile, waving at a few of the kids who had rushed forwards to compliment her on her hair.
"Still, why do parents keep sending their kids to this school?" asked Neil in a rather happy voice that contradicted what he was saying. His voice was too happy for the depressing words he spake. Or spoke.
Jane shrugged. "Cause it's the only one?"
"Cid probably killed all the competition a long time ago…"
"Don't be ridic- wait… Actually, I wouldn't put it past him…"
Jane shuftied her eyes (or shiftied, or made her eyes shifty, if you want to get technical) and walked out of the room quickly, before it was her wearing a whiteboard as a ruff and a Kleenex box for a shoe.
Their departure with the much-loved Mr. Goobadier ended, with the closure of the Barney song, which hung in people's hearts for a long time.
For two seconds.
Until they marched into registration.
●◦●----------------------Oo
Their new teacher, following the tragic concussion of Goofy, was called Donald. He was short-ish and duck-ish and grumpy-ish, and he wore a silly little blue outfit with a silly little hat and sat rocking at his desk with a maniacal gleam in his eye, babbling on about Vietnam and how he was THERE, fighting the trenches. Nobody bothered to point out that, as he was crazy, it was impossible that he had ever served in Vietnam. They were sure crazy people weren't hired for the army in fear they'd laugh manically and shoot all their comrades, before tossing a grenade and blasting everybody to Kingdom Come. Nobody wanted to point this out, mostly because they were not sure what he was stroking under the table.
Sora's bets were on a machine gun or a flamethrower or a musket, Riku's on an evil diabolical cat called Fluffy, and eventually he'd swivel around on his chair despite the fact it was the non-swivel variety and say in a dark voice: 'Ah, Mr. Sora, we meet again! FOR THE FIRST TIME!' Cue maniacal laughter.
Roxas thought he had both, though, to be quite honest.
He had, after all, seen everything at this school.
"You know what, kiddies?" asked Mr. Duck, leering at them all from over his desk that was too large for him, the light from the windows spilling over his face, making him look evil.
They all shrunk back in fear, looking around and gulping, daring each other to be the first to try to run away. It was sure as hell they weren't safe within the gaze of Mr. Duck.
"W-What?" asked Kairi shakily, brushing a few strands of red hair out of her eyes and nibbling her lip, not wanting to anger Mr. Duck.
"When I was a kid I never wanted to be a temporary teacher. I wanted to manage a slaughter house! But then Vietnam happened, I stood up for my nation, and blam! Biff! Splot! Kaboom! Boof! Bang! I'M SILLY! I survived, and what with my horrible, horrible webbed feet, a result of some chemical gas, I was sent to the lowly roll of temp teacher! But I know the army folk are still after me with their guns and sirens and alarms, waiting, waiting… I WAS THE FEARLESS MR. DUCK AND THEY ALL WANTED A PIECE OF ME!"
"Duck sandwich…" muttered Sora, and he and Riku giggled silently between themselves, until Mr. Duck's searing glare found their faces, shooting them looks that could freeze ice. They shut up.
"Anyway, as I was saying, I know they're all around here somewhere… Anywhere… Behind the curtains… Under the stairs… In lamps and clocks and flowerbeds they all hide, ready to tear me asunder! BUT FEAR NOT! IF THE MAFIA JUMP DOWN FROM THE CHURCH CEILING WITH POINTED SWORDS NO HARM WILL COME TO YE!"
"He's obviously never met Sephiroth…" muttered Kairi.
"NO HARM WILL COME TO YE BECAUSE OF TRUSTY MARTHA HERE!" screamed Donald, raising a musket, not a cat, from behind the desk.
The kids shrunk back and started to quiver like jellies in school uniform.
"Um… Mr. Duck…" said Kairi slowly, seeming to be the only one brave enough to talk to him.
"What, little girl?"
"Shouldn't you be … er… putting the nice rifle…"
"Musket…"
"Er, musket away and taking the register? You know? Its rules and regulations… And … er … Yeah … I'll be quiet cause I'm sort of digging my own grave here…" she concurred, laughing nervously as people shot her dirty glares, and Donald really shot her. Well, not really, because that would result in a lot of nasty paperwork, but from his twitching eye it was obvious he wanted to shoot her. He obvious didn't like little kids pointing out to him battling on about 'trusty Martha' was not taking the register.
"Alright then…" hissed Mr. Duck, cackling as he glanced over the sheet that contained all the names of the children in the class. "Sora?"
"Here sir."
"Riku?"
"Here sir…"
"Knew a Riku once… Was a very cowardly solider in the Vietnam War. He tried to run away from battle like the lowly maggot he was and got shot. I should shoot you, boy, for sharing the same name as him…"
"But I'm not that Riku."
"I should shoot you, boy, for answering back to me…"
Riku gulped and decided to wisest course of action was to say nothing.
Half-way through the register, however, the worst thing that could possibly happen just randomly decided to happen.
Sir was half-way through saying Roxas' name when the earthquake alarm bell went off. Loudly.
Earthquake drills (the old 'duck ((if you'll excuse the pun)) and cover routine) were pretty normal at school. On Destiny Islands earthquakes were pretty common and could happen any time, any place, and so all the kids had to be trained against them. Mr. Duck, however, did not seem to know this, or was so crazy he'd forgotten.
"BRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGG!!!!"
"RIKU! C'MERE LAD! I knews I should have shot you, you had that shifty look in your eyes! You've led the army to me, haven't you? HAVEN'T YOU? Betrayed my position like the yellow-bellied coward you are! I should shoot you, boy, for proving true to your name…"
"Sir! I didn't bring the army towards you! It's just a practise earthquake drill…"
"I should shoot you, boy, for answering back to me…"
"Sir! If the nice … 'army people' really are coming after you, wouldn't it better to hide under our desks than shoot Riku?" asked Kairi. She didn't really want Donald to freak out and shoot Riku over a pretend earthquake drill… Stress the word 'pretend'. The fact the floor was shaking was mere coincidence: freaky plumping or under floor heating was probably the cause of that.
Mr. Duck paused for a moment, before smiling.
"Right you are, you clever girl! If the army people are here we should all hide, and throw Riku out the window and make him fight all the enemies bare-handed! Just to prove his worth! AND JUST FOR THE HELL OF IT! AND BECAUSE I'M SILLY!"
"But sir, that's not quite what I had in mi-"
"Out you go, boy," said Donald curtly, throwing Riku outside the classroom and slamming the door shut.
Kairi sighed, as Riku gave her the most horrible look, just before the door was slammed in his face and she could see the poor boy no longer.
●◦●----------------------Oo
However, in the class belonging to the grade 10s, they had no crazy teacher called Mr. Duck who kept babbling on about shooting Riku, or Rikku. But nobody would ever want to shoot Rikku anyway, because she was so sweet and kind and hyper.
"Don't panic kids…" said Mr. Eeyore in his tired-out voice, rubbing his hair and pondering his non-existent moustache for about ten minutes, as the kids all waited patiently for their orders of what to do. If there were a real earthquake they'd probably all be dead by now, what with Eeyore taking so long to come to a decision.
"Sir, in the case of earthquake I think we all shakey-shake our way under our tables, and, uh, vamoose, y'know?" offered Rikku helpfully, looking around nervously as a few picturely loosely blu-tacked to the wall fell off like white paper butterflies. The floor was shaking… This was a bit expensive for a mere simulation of an earthquake. She was sure the school would never be able to afford making the floor shake realistically…
The girl was waving her arms around in 'panic' mode, but suddenly found a rather heavy weight had befallen onto them, anchoring them in place. She paused, wondering if she were dead and had been killed by the earthquake whilst Mr. Eeyore still pondered over their course of action, when she turned and saw her friendly neighbourhood Axel holding her hand.
"A- Ah… Axel?"
"You were shaking. That's all," Axel shrugged. "Thought you were scared…"
Rikku was about to reply with a blush and maybe a quick kiss on the cheek for thanks (she was so continental, 'dahlings') but Mr. Eeyore cut her off with his ultimate words of wisdom: "Yes." Well, WORD of wisdom, but just look upon 'words' as a typo.
Everybody turned to their neighbour in confusion, and, to Axel's great distaste, Yuffie turned to Leon. Her neighbour, that little gay-boy with the scar and the hair that he flipped back, trying to act 'pretty'. Heh. He practically had 'pretty boy' written across his face. Infact, he probably did – once Axel had crept up to him whilst he was sleeping in Physics and written 'I R PRETTYBOY' on his face in permanent green marker. The teacher, surprisingly, smiled and nodded his head, claiming it was all true, and he could stop Axel in his never-ending fight against truth and justice. Or at least his never-ending fight to make an ass out of Leon.
"'Yes' what?" asked Yuffie in confusion.
And, about two hours later…
"No…" said Mr. Eeyore.
About two ho-
"OH SCREW IT!" cried Axel, diving under his desk and pulling the blonde down after him.
It would have looked quite wrong, to those who had not known it was an earthquake drill, to see the redhead drag the pretty blonde under the table with him, as if they were going to have some sort of heavy make-out session. But those silly people I simply say 'screw you, you have been paying more attention whilst reading the story of you'd know what's going on', and let the scene continue.
Pretty soon, all the kids had found safety from the increased shaking under their tables, whilst Mr. Eeyore stood there, wondering vaguely where all his kids went.
"Yes, children…" said Mr. Eeyore slowly. "My house is made of sticks. It means little to you."
Meanwhile, under Yuffie and Leon's table, which can be located on Mars, and now, more commonly, Saturn.
Leon smirked as he 'schmoozed' up to Yuffie, taking now as the moment to tear her apart from her red-headed boyfriend and claim the spoils all for himself. If he ignored the fact the words: 'I R PRETTYBOY' were still written on his head in faint green marker he felt confident. And it was dark under the table, so nobody would be able to see the words on his head, unless they were luminous, which was rather sil-
Oh damn, they were luminous.
But he could not let a silly, petty insult stop him in his attempts to win over Yuffie.
"You know, I think I know why we're having an earthquake drill…"
"Why?"
"Cause the earth wants to drive you out of the school so it can ogle at your beauty under the warmth of the sun…"
"Are you saying the earth wants to lure me outside the school, the only place of safety in these troubled times, to kill me?"
Leon was no good at this flirting crap, he really wasn't.
"Yes…"
Yuffie sighed, and wished Leon could just wipe of the mask and those (partially) truthful words written on his head and step out of the stoic shell.
And get rid of those crappy pickup lines.
And maybe get a new haircut.
And stop squeezing her leg.
Of course, an angel decided to descend from the sky at that moment and hear her prayers, as Leon's hand was roughly removed from her thigh.
With force.
"GET YOUR FILTHY PAWS OF MY GIRLFRIEND, YOU FUCKIN' PRETTY-BOY!" roared Axel, his temper blazing as red-hot and firey as the colour of his hair, unceremoniously kicking Leon away from the table he shared with Yuffie and under the unoccupied, unstable one in the corner whose legs had a nasty habit of falling off, and fall off one of the legs did. The tremors from Leon's rolling body and the shaking floor made the leg buckle and snap, as the ten-tonne desk descended down on Leon and crushed him into a rather unpleasant sandwich of floor, boy and table. Either picture the sandwich idea, or say that they were all having a wild gangbang and leave it at that. But of course, we cannot just 'leave it as that' because it is impossible for a floor, a table and a dead/unconscious boy to summon up the energy needed to take part in a gangbang. And thus, the circle of life goes on.
"Owch…" muttered Leon, his tongue lolling out of his mouth and a black patch forming around his eye, his legs and arms and heads irregularly broken, sticking out from under the desk at all angles.
"I always wondered why you're meant to hide under heavy tables whilst earthquakes are taking place…" said Yuffie, pondering. She didn't seem to care Leon was very badly hurt; she was stood there, looking down upon his carcass from a great height. This was probably the last time she'd ever be taller than Leon and she had to SAVOUR it.
"Axel…" said Mr. Eeyore in a tired voice. "You cannot expect to kill a kid-" (Leon: But I'm not dead!) "-and go unpunished. We will have to deal with a lot of nasty paperwork-" (Leon: But I'm still not dead!) "-and contact the bereaving parents-" (Leon: I might get better if you'd take the desk off me! Axel: Shut up… /kicks Leon/ Yuffie/takes out popcorn/) "-AND arrange for a funeral-" (hereby Leon has been knocked out by Axel's shoes and is too unconscious to complain) "-and I think that violates a few laws, if not in this state, than in several others. Now go stand outside and think about what you've done."
"B-B-But there's an earthquake! He could be killed if he doesn't duck down under one of those t-t-tables and…" Rikku had started, but eventually she turned to look at Leon, crushed under the table.
"Actually, I think I'd rather take my chances outside," she muttered, grabbing hold onto Axel's palm, jauntily waving at everybody behind her, then rushing off in search of a better life.
"Come back, children. You will be killed. That will be bad. Axel may die but you are too smart to die. Please." Eeyore attempted to plead, but after a while forgot what he was pleading about and turned to face the class.
"I appear to have lost my tail…"
●◦●----------------------Oo
Axel and Rikku were running along the corridor, hand-in-hand as chandeliers that only appeared to look more dramatic in their 'last moments' fell down around them and erupted in showers of glass, bursting into flames.
The floor shook around violently, as they ran around endless corridors in search of somewhere safe and soft and squishy and …
"OWWWWWWW-YYYYYYYYYY!"
Safe and soft and squishy and Riku's nose-y.
The kids collapsed in a pile of limbs and eight heads (and counting) outside grade nine's classroom.
From inside, screams of excitement that sounded oddly like a duck quacking could be heard, as the children all attempted to extract themselves from the heap they were laid in, feeling the ground and each other move uncomfortably beneath them.
"I bet that Riku boy's gone and found himself the army! They'll be here right now, knocking at our door, with Riku's head in one arm, and I'll shoot em all with trusty Martha cause I'm silly and then the school will be liberated and we'll all be free to dance outside on the streets to country music," said the duck-like voice, becoming closer and more clearer from behind the door, as the piece of wood separating room and corridor was flung open, straight into Riku's nose, blowing him backwards by about two yards and into the path of an on-coming chandelier.
"Oh…" said the teacher, with crazy circles rolling around in his eyes and a musket in his wings (hands), looking up and down at Rikku and Axel as if he were somehow disappointed. "Oh… you're not the army afterall… But I take it you did vanquish Riku?"
"Well, er, he's over there…" said Rikku rather lamely, pointing at the chandelier that the boy was lying under, crushed.
"Well, that's good enough for me!" proclaimed Mr. Duck, shoving them into the classroom. "You good chappie-chaps are free to stay down in the trenches for a while until this horrible shaking wears loose," said the teacher, swinging his arms around to give them a good view of the carnage that had once been the form room of the grade niners. For, oh no, they hadn't just decided to hide under their desks – that would be too easy. Instead, probably under the orders of the deranged teacher who had no place working in their school, they had laid all their desks on the floor on their sides, and were hiding behind them, heads bobbing up and around from over their shields.
"RRROOOOXXXIIIIIEEEEE!" Rikku cried suddenly, spotting Roxas's head bobbing around amongst many others, picking up her skirts (not that she had skirts) like people generally did in old medieval movies where all the women wore skirts and stayed at home and cooked whilst the men rode to war and eventually care home from war, causing all the women to gather their skirts at the front and run forth to meet them in a rather romantic and rib-crushing hug. The sorts of hugs that would kill the older and more asthmatic of us.
Rikku dived under their make-shift wall of defence, dragging Axel down with her, as they landed in an ungainly heap (again) on top of something rather cushiony (déjà vu much?) but this time the thing was not Riku's-nose-y. It was a bit more Roxas-shaped, with a pineapple hair-do.
Roxas made a muffled sort of 'pweet' sound, as the two rather heavy yet strangely skinny teens crushed him, pinning him down.
"Ung… Heh… Hey, Rikku…" said Roxas slowly, as Rikku gave him a bone-crunching hug. Just like in the movies, but with more blood and guts and green stuff shooting out the victims of the vicious hug's nose, things that get cut out of films for time. "And, er, hey…"
"Axel. Got it memorized?" asked the bored red-head, gathering his limbs and moving off Roxas, feeling he was crushing the poor kid.
Roxas nodded, to show he had indeed 'got it memorized'.
"Axel? Isn't that like a car-part?" asked Roxas, as he turned and made himself a comfy nest against the chest of the older boy who had randomly come flying through the air, dragged behind Rikku like the fair maidens in the ninja films that were dragged over tree-tops by male ninjas with kunami and waffles. Roxas liked random people that got pulled through they air – they often signified good things, like money and fame and being crushed. He was thankful for something comfy to rest his head on, aside from the cold, hard wall.
"Shut up…" muttered Axel, as Rikku plodded over and made herself comfy around his legs, both kids sharing space on Axel, clinging to something solid during the troubled times of earthquake-an-ism.
Pretty slowly all the children began to fall asleep, Rikku's head falling heavily against Axel's legs, the after shocks of the pretty small earthquake that had never grown up or managed to spread its wings shaking the floor gently in a soothing lullaby.
"So, uh, how do you know Rikku?" Axel asked the boy who was resting his head comfortably on him. He would have told him to fuck off had it been Leon and maybe kicked under five other desks just for variety, and if it had been anybody else he'd have told them to fuck off and kicked them under one desk. But he didn't mind this weird kid sharing his personal space and breathing in his air – it was relaxing, somewhat, and not in the boring way that Mr. Eeyore was 'relaxing'. He didn't even have it in his heart to tell the boy to stop putting so much gel in his hair cause his pineapple was spiking his nose.
"We're … er …" Roxas would have told him they were 'related', but he didn't want to ruin Rikku's reputation in front of her friend, which he was guessing this boy was. So he lied. But he didn't really, because adopted siblings don't count as actually being relations, do they? And neither do IMAGINARY siblings, MINDY! SOMETHING TO BEAR IN MIND! Roxas hoped Mindy hadn't taken advantage of the volatile situation and run off with Leny and Sock in search of their lost (and most likely made-up) brothers and sisters. "Well, me and Rikku, we're like friends. Not very good friends though… I'm like… The little kid beside her… The one she can rest her elbow on or get to hold her beer… Not that she drinks beer…"
Axel nodded, as the slow rhythmic moving of the floor shook the boy into a gentle slumber, thinking maybe he just had a thing for blondes. Blondes seemed to have a thing for him as well, as two of them were perched on him, using him shamelessly as a pillow.
"Well, guys…" said Mr. Duck, storing trusty old Martha away under his desk. "Well, er, red-headed freak…" he corrected himself, noticing only Axel was awake underneath all the piles of limbs and desks tipped on their sides that obscured him from view. "How's about a hearty, rousing Maths exam to shake us out of that 'my-school-hath-just-been-invaded-by-the-army' vibe?"
Axel closed his eyes and quickly pretended to be asleep.
●◦●----------------------Oo
Roxas was pulled to his feet about an hour later by a hyper energetic red-head – not that tall Axel kid, who seemed to have scampered off with Rikku, to the centre of the universe. Or maybe back to their classroom, to be less dramatic.
"What? Is it World War IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIXIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIL?" asked Roxas sleepily, proving his DID know his Greek numerals.
"No… I believe that's the title of the newest Final Fantasy game…" said Kairi, pausing to stroke her non-existent moustache.
"Oh well… I was close enough."
"Yes," said Kairi, stroking her existent moustache in deep t- wait, Kairi didn't have a moustache. I'll really have to ask who hath being screwing with our trusty mon script… /turns to glare at Lamatikah/
Lamatikah: You wrote that.
Skitts: … Damn … It appears you are right… Oh well /ponders existent BREAD/
Lamatikah: Wait… No, I did write that.
We shall quickly move on now…
"Anyway, what?" Roxas watched Kairi observantly, pondering his non-existent BREAD.
"Well, the earthquake didn't hit here that much but a few buildings got wrecked pretty bad near the shopping centre. Wanna come gawk and the burning flames and dead bodies?" asked Kairi casually, leaning against the wall.
"Why are you asking me? Why not go with Sora?"
"'Cause Riku got crushed by a chandelier and Sora is at the hospital with him."
"Oh… But wait… This school doesn't have any chandeliers."
"Not any more."
Roxas shrugged, guessing Kairi was probably right, as he grabbed her hand and they ran out of the school, jumping over a chandelier that had fallen in front of the doorway, blood trickling out from underneath in merry patterns.
●◦●----------------------Oo
Sora was sad.
He was walking along with his head hung low, hands balled into fists and stuffed roughly into his pockets.
There was not much point waiting around for Riku to get better at hospital when the doctors had claimed the boy was either dead or unconscious and would only get better with time and several gory operations where they inserted wire metals gears in his chest and cranked it open to poke around in his ribs and mix his heart and lungs up a bit with a spoon. And Sora didn't, as much as he 'loved' Riku, want to watch doctors in white coats poke around at his innards like the contents of a canned of baked beans.
He sighed, walking along the street, looking around at cracked tarmac underfoot and crowds of people gathering around to look at broken buildings and equally broken people. Some were sobbing, a few were crying over dead bodies, and several were cursing the French for the earthquake. And, of course, a small gang of kids at the back of the crowds were whipping their berets off their heads and eating them. Quickly.
He couldn't help noticing Kairi was amongst the crowds, cheering on as bodies were dragged from buildings, with a rather bemused looking Roxas at her side. Sora growled at this sight and kicked a crumpled can along the ground.
How dare his girlfriend schmooze around with that bozo? How dare his girlfriend cheat on him and see date his own fucking cousin shamefully behind his back? No, it wasn't even BEHIND HIS BACK, it was right in front of his fact, RIGHT IN FRONT OF IT, ONLY A FEW FUCKING CENTIMETRES AWAY THEY WERE LAUGHING AND CONVERSING AND HOLDING HANDS! Well, they weren't holding hands to be exact, but they were being pretty damned well friendly. And, well, it was true that were very close to each other, but it was also true they were trapped together in a small confined space with crowds moving around them, pressing down left right and centre.
It wasn't fair. If Roxas hadn't come over to his school – his school – and barged in, straight through the wall and not even bothering to knock, Sora would've been the one stood there with Kairi. And if he wasn't, then Kairi would have been faithful and not gone at all.
He frowned, making some rough plans in his mind to stab Roxas, grab a Tropicarna and then maybe go to the cinema with Kairi. In no exact order.
"Hello, honey!" Belle greeted her son as soon as he opened the door the tiniest crack. Belle, the 'perfect housewife', with her hair done up all high on her head and pretty in a blue cloth with a white apron tied around her waist, enveloped her son in a crushing hug that ground his bones together. "I heard about the earthquake… Hit your school bad, did it honey?"
"I'm fine," hissed Sora in his vile mood, pushing away from 'mummy dearest'. He scowled, arranging his hair so it hung at trademark Sora angle – a.k.a 'rakish'. He didn't want to drown in the arms of his mother, didn't want to be smothered in honey and drowning in sugar. "I look fine, don't I?"
"You have a fever! You're warm!" cried Belle in alarm, bustling around, attempting to play at being a perfect mother. She tried so hard it was embarrassing, and sort of hurt Sora… Couldn't she be happy with what she had? Make-do-and-mend? Wasn't he, Sora, good enough for her? Why did she insist on attempting to mutate her kid with daily doses of calpol? Did she think the medicine would fix something about him? Were his eyes too blue or close together, hair too 'rakish'?
Sora remembered when he was little he secretly wished he had Roxas' family.
And … maybe he still did?
Or at least, he used to, until Belle poisoned Meg's mind and forced her into thinking a perfect, whacked-on-steroids-and-calpol family was the way to go.
"What flavour calpol do you want, Sora?"
"I don't want any. I'm NOT SICK!"
"But you endured such terrible hardships. An earthquake! What flavour? Or maybe you'd prefer some lemon and sugar mixture? You know? It helps with colds-"
Sora was practically pulling fistfuls of his lovely chocolate brown spikes out as Belle continued rambling on, listing strange home-made remedies. She'd be getting onto the witch hazel next, and healing herbs. I mean, come on, LEAVE THE HERBS OUT OF THIS! What did the herbs do to anyone?
"LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!" screeched Sora horribly, charging upstairs and slamming the door shut so loudly the whole house echoed with the after-shock.
The bottles in the medicine cabinet downstairs shook, as Belle sniffed softly, pondering thoughts of her little boy growing up and turning into … Marluxia. Drama Queen.
She don't her little boy to mingle with Roxas's family, she didn't want them to live in the same places. Continents, oceans, galaxies apart wasn't apart enough for Belle – she'd never be far away enough from Meg. Never stop walking in her shadow.
All he had was her family, and even that was unstable ground. If only she could wrap Sora in bubble wrap forever and preserve his young, good-natured spirit… She missed her sweet little boy…
Tears filled Belle's eyes, as she rested her head wearily against the medicine cabinet.
"God, they grow up too fast…"
●◦●----------------------Oo
Roxas was looking forward to going home after an exhausting day of hiding behind desks and being threatened by people with muskets and earthquakes.
So, he was only the slightest bit – oh, how shall we put this – pissed off when he came home to find out he didn't actually have a home anymore. More like a drenched pile of bricks surrounded by a field of mud.
"Hercules… What happened?" asked Roxas slowly, looking around at the wreckage that he had (once upon a time, about five hours ago) been able to call home.
The man stood in the garden grinned sheepishly as he attempted to scratch a sore spot on his back with a chisel. Ah … That was probably one of the weapons of destruction that helped the house look like it how it currently did.
Hercules smiled brightly as the chisel pulled a lump of skin of his back. "Heh… Actually, that was quite painful…"
"Did you do DIY again? Without Meg in the house?" asked Mindy, raising an eyebrow.
"Maybe I did and maybe I didn't."
"But the fact remains that you did," said Rikku bluntly.
"Yes. I did."
"And… Elaborate?" asked Roxas.
"I was trying to fix the toilet because it kept spewing up colourful gunge when I tried flushing it that stung my eyes. So I tried to get a look at the back of it to see how well it was … ah … connected, connected, yes, and then I sort of swung my big hammer and the whole toilet can unconnected to the wall and I was shot backwards about fifty feet by a vicious jet of water that engulfed the house, taking all our possessions with it."
"Where's Marly?" asked Naminé with wide eyes, attempting to hide from the crazy man with swirly eyes that swaggered around in front of her. He seemed pleased with himself. He had destroyed many things and may or may not have killed Meg and Marly in the process.
"He's with Larxene and Megara went to went to buy me a new big hammer from the DIY store because I believe I broke this one smashing the toilet apart with it."
Everybody knew that Meg had not gone to get him another 'big hammer' (they didn't need him hacking holes in the walls of their bedrooms to create lovely balconies minus the balcony and plus a long dropt to their deaths) but had gone to the chemist's to get some of those nice orange-flavoured pills he liked to take when his brain took over.
"Dad, where are going to sleep?" asked Rikku.
"IN THE TENTS IN THE GARDEN!" roared Hercules merrily, gesturing to a large patch of soil behind him, some tents billowing away merrily in the breeze in the background. They had obviously uprooted themselves, deciding on the spur of the moment to start 'breakin' free, sorain', flyin', there's not a star in heaven they can't reach'.
"Er… Herc…" said Roxas, pointing at the tents that were flying away, across the hill and over the bridge and past the state border.
Hercules turned around, and his happy smile instantly faded.
"Oh … Oh dear… Well kids, it looks like you'll all be livin' in a box for tonight, unless you can go to one of your little chum's houses, which I really hope you can do because there's fuck all you can do down here," he said merrily, running off after the renegade tents.
And they never saw him again.
…
Actually, they did, but they were all wishing they'd never see him again.
●◦●----------------------Xx
A/N: Hehehe.
Well…
Avast!
Read the crazy chapter now.
IF YOU CAN HANDLE THE CRAZINESS!