Ch. 5

17 years old

"I can't believe that after four years of training with Sif you still can't beat me. Even in a mock duel, where I'm going easy on you!" Thor's loud voice taunted. His blue eyes were shining from the excitement our fight brought him. He had a wide grin on as he laughed at my failed attempts to beat him.

I glared as I sat down across from him. We were outside on the training grounds and, as usual, Thor had beaten me. "I just have a lot of stuff on my mind, lately."

"Oh?" Thor suddenly looked interested. "Want to tell me about it?"

I shrugged, "Why not? I've been thinking about Fandral."

"What about Fandral?"

"I've kind of been meaning to tell him that I don't think we're working. You know as a couple? I just don't feel the same way about him as he does about me. I mean I totally love him as a friend. I always will, but he just isn't the one."

"Oh.. Um, how long have you felt this way?" He looked a little uncomfortable.

"A few months. I didn't want to hurt him, so I was trying to convince myself that this is what I want."

"Why wouldn't you just tell him?"

"I don't know. Like I said, I didn't want to hurt him." I looked down, feeling ashamed that I hadn't told him yet.

"What made you decide to tell him, then?"

"A few months ago I realized something other than my lack of feelings for him. And that's been weighing on my mind since then."

Thor looked even more interested, if that was possible. "What else did you realize?"

I looked away. I couldn't look him in the eyes when I told him this. "I realized that I have feelings for someone else.."

"Who else do you have feelings for, Sigyn?"

I turned and looked him in the eye, deciding it's be worse to not be looking at him. "Thor.. I love Loki."

He stiffened. "You love Loki?" I nodded, not trusting my voice. "Does he know?"

"No, he doesn't."

"Well, I can certainly see why you want to break if off with Fandral. You aren't going to tell him it's because of Loki are you?"

"If I don't have to, I wont." I didn't see why I'd have to. Loki didn't feel the same way that I did.

"You should tell him as soon as possible, Sigyn."

I nodded, "You're right. I definitely should. I'm going to go tell him right now, okay?"

"Do what you must. Good luck."

"Thanks for coming here." Fandral walked into my room slowly, a confused look on his face.

"It's no problem. I've actually been meaning to tell you something." He looked down as he said that.

I did the same, playing with my hands in my lap. I didn't know how to start this. Maybe I should rip it off like a Band-Aid? "Me too. I don't think this is working, Fandral. I've tried but I can't think of you as anything but my friend."

Fandral looked relieved. "Oh, thank Odin you said that. I was going to tell you the exact same thing. I've been trying my hardest to think of you as anything more but I just can't."

I laughed. "Me too! I mean, seriously? How did we not notice this? It's been four years."

Fandral laughed, "I know. Lately it's been bothering me though. I can't keep lying to you and making you think I like you more than a friend. So, I decided I'd tell you today."

"Yeah, I was talking to Thor and he convinced me that I had to tell you as soon as possible. I do love you though. Just as a friend. I don't love you in any romantic way."

"Like with Loki?"

I froze, my eyes wide. "What?"

"I see the way you look at him. You may not notice it, but every time he's anywhere near you, you start glowing. Your eyes get these stars in them and sparkle. Your mood shifts, automatically becoming happy. Whenever he talks to you, your cheeks color. It's quite obvious, actually. I don't know how he doesn't know that."

I stared at him, mortified. My eyes grew wide, my jaw dropping to the ground. "Am I really that obvious?!"

Fandral laughed, "Of course not. I was simply teasing you. It was certainly worth it, might I say."

"Oh, yes. I can totally see how that's worth it." I narrowed my eyes at him, jokingly.

"You know it was funny." He reached over and messed up my hair. "Anyway, are you planning to tell him?"

"Gosh no! Embarrass myself? Not happening."

"What? Embarrass yourself? You wouldn't embarrass yourself. He'd be stupid not to like you."

"Is that what you are then?" I teased.

"Yes, but we already knew that. However, I gave us a chance. And we realized that us didn't work well. We are better as just friends. You and Loki, however, haven't taken a chance yet. You should try it. See what happens. You might be happy with the results?"

"No. I'm not going to. Me and Loki are better off as just friends anyway. I don't want to ruin our friendship by admitting feelings to him that he doesn't return."

Fandral nodded, "Alright. I can see why you wouldn't want to ruin it. He's your best friend. I wouldn't want to ruin it, either."