Tuesday was another free day, which was fine by Ed; it meant they could sit around and plan in private.

Tossing aside, he and Envy sat down on the mattress, facing each other. But before Edward could speak, Envy commented, "You know, this is the third free day we're just going to sit around. We really ought to be doing something else, shouldn't we?"

Ed paled, his heart skipping a beat. Of course they couldn't do anything else, not with Mr. Nichols watching! What was Envy thinking—unless the other boy got off on that kind of thing. Gulping, Edward whispered, "Envy—we can't—"

"Oh, no, shit, you didn't think I meant actually doing it, did you?" Envy interrupted, placing his hands on either side of Ed's face. "No way! I can't stand the thought of that bastard enjoying anything he's got stored up, I'm not about to hand him new material! I just meant we should try to fake it; keep all our clothes on, just make it look like we're fucking so we don't look suspicious. We don't want him to realize we know anything."

"Oh…" Edward sighed, relieved. "Sorry, I just—you scared me, there."

Rolling his eyes, Envy pushed Ed down, hovering above him close enough to where, from the camera, it would look as though they were kissing. "I wouldn't do that to you," he repeated. "So like I said, we'll just have to face it."

"This is so weird," Ed laughed.

"I know, but what are you gonna do?" Envy asked, pushing a hand up Edward's shirt and letting it lie there. "So…any ideas?"

Ed arched up as though he were being touched, trying to keep from giggling—acting. Who knew he would have to act. "Not…really. I mean, we have to get the bag away from him for long enough to look through it, which is going to be pretty hard…"

"I was thinking that, too," the green haired boy agreed, dropping his hand down and resting it just on Ed's thigh. If the camera could see Envy's hand, it would look like he was actually at Edward's crotch. "And the chances of us getting that much time alone with the bag is pretty much nil so long as we're here. So the obvious solution is to steal it."

"What?" Ed hissed. "You're kidding me. We can't, there's no way…it's a big back, Envy, people are going to notice if I walk that thing home. Hell, we'd be lucky to get it out of the school."

"Okay, well, say we could get it out of the school," Envy insisted. "What if we had someone waiting to pick us up? That way we could just toss it in and be set."

"Roy doesn't get off work early enough for that, and he can't just leave…"

"You seem to be forgetting, I have a family too." With that, Envy reached into the pocket of his jeans, whipping out his phone.

"Envy!" Edward warned. "Cameras!"

"Oh, please," the other boy scoffed. "Nichols is just going to think I'm taking pictures of you. Pull up your shirt, just a little? To make it seem real. Not enough for it to excite him."

Ed obliged as Envy's thumbs whizzed across the screen, texting whoever. For effect, he bucked up into Envy, letting his mouth fall open as if he were moaning.

"Are you in theater?" Envy asked absentmindedly.

"No…?"

"You should be—there! Greed'll be waiting in front of the school when we get out," the green haired boy announced.

Edward blanched. "Today!?"

"Look, it's what he agreed to; honestly, we're lucky he's doing it at all." Envy moved back into position, pressing himself down on Ed once more.

"How are we supposed to manage to get his bag by the end of today? We don't have any time to plan…"

"So we're just going to have to wing it, yeah. More exciting anyway." Suddenly, Envy sat up again. "Hey, roll over. Gotta make it seem like we're getting to the good stuff."

Huffing, his mind racing trying to think of something quick, Ed turned over and presented Envy his jean-covered ass. "This isn't going to look real with my pants on."

"I know," Envy remarked, pulling the jeans down. Edward yelped, but the other boy just said, "Calm down! I'm only doing it a little. You don't really think I'm gonna let Nichols see anything? Your ass is mine."

Nevertheless, Ed grumbled as Envy slid his hand under the jeans, resting it atop his boxers so that it would (hopefully) look like they were getting ready. "This is ridiculous."

"Actually…" Envy paused, thoughtful. "It might be just what we need."

"What?"

"Well, he always comes in to look after we finish, right? And he does it for the other couples as well. So as soon as he leaves, we can run out and grab the bag and head for the door. The bell should have rung by then, and even if it hasn't, better to be on the way regardless."

Edward considered this plan, sighing. "I don't like it. There's too many variables."

"You sound like Roy," Envy teased, removing his hand and pretending to pull Ed's pants down as he pushed his crotch against Edward's ass.

Trying to ignore the strange sensation of Envy dry humping him, Ed went on. "But I can't think of anything better, so…we'll just have to risk it."

"That's more like it—when do you think we should pretend to be done?"

"Soon," Edward replied dryly. "He's not going to believe you're lasting this long."

Envy smacked the back of his head gently, making Ed laugh, ducking his head to hide it. "Alright, fine. Finished in three, two, one…" The green haired boy pushed forward, hard enough to almost make Edward fall on his face even as he tried to fake it himself.

Pulling Ed's pants back up, Envy flopped down next to him. "See? That wasn't so bad. Now get ready to run."

Tensing up, Edward tried to keep his expression relaxed as he curled against Envy. Sure enough, not a minute later, Mr. Nichols swiped aside their curtain. "You boys doing alright?"

They nodded wordlessly, jumping up almost before he left. Edward peaked out the curtain—the man was walking away towards another little "room," and his bag…was sitting in front of his slightly ajar office door. "Get our backpacks," Ed hissed, before he started his sprint across the gym. Why the gym!? His heart was pounding as he tried to make as little noise as possible, but he couldn't avoid the faint squeaking of his and Envy's shoes. Halfway across the gym, Mr. Nichols shouted out to them, but luckily the bell rang just then. Hopefully the man would just think they were running to get out of school, and not to steal hi shit.

Envy jumped onto the bleachers, grabbing both of their backpacks, while Ed snagged the bag, his action blocked from Mr. Nichol's view by the flood of students exiting their sections of the gym. Really, the timing of it all was so perfect, Edward would have been thanking a god if he believed in one. He continued sprinting, out of the gym with Envy on his heels, all the way into the parking lot.

"Which car?" Ed asked frantically, looking at the long line of vehicles waiting to pick students up.

"That one!" Envy replied, running forwards towards a black van, complete with tinted windows. Even anxious as he was to get away, Edward couldn't help but laugh at how perfectly suspicious their getaway car was.

Nevertheless, they made it I one piece, Ed throwing the bag into the back and then sliding in. "Fuck, little bro," Greed said from up front. "What's the rush?"

"Well," Envy answered, closing his door as Greed started off. "We may or may not have just been involved in illegal activity."

That really rammed it home for Edward. He slumped in his seat, moaning, "We just stole a teacher's personal possessions!"

"For good reason."

"Either way, we're going to be lucky if we aren't expelled for this."

Up front, Greed laughed, and when Ed looked up, he was met with dark eyes peeking over sunglasses at him in the rearview mirror. "I have to say, Envy, I'm pretty impressed. I mean, I know you told me you picked up a cutie, but damn." At those words, Ed blushed to the roots of his hair, making Greed add, "He seems a little shy for your type, though, doesn't he?"

"Nah," Envy responded, caressing Edward's crimson cheek. "He's pretty much perfect."

"Can we just please get to my house!?" Ed interrupted. "We need to look in the bag, remember?"

"Sure thing," Greed replied calmly. The van grew silent for a long moment, before he went on, "So…where am I going?"