"Okay, first things first, your clothes..." Jeiel said walking around my room searching my clothes.
"Please don't tell me you 'gonna do one of those huge makeovers where I have to lose 100 lbs." I said scratching my bald head.
"Don't be silly, Russ. You should always be 100% yourself when you are trying to get a girl, because when things get serious, eventually the girl will see right through your lies. I can't tell you how many boys I dated that tried being like someone else to impress me when..." I tried finishing her sentence saying, "When the real them was unattractive and less appealing?"
Jeiel looked up from my clothes and answered, "No, their true self was much better than who they were trying to be."
"So tell me your personality, sometimes the wrong clothes for your personality can give someone the wrong impression of you." Jeiel continued. I looked down at my body, contemplating this question.
"I like playing drums and I love hip-hop music." I finally said.
Jeiel sighed, "No, I mean deeper. Like for me as an example, I wear bright colors to show I'm optimistic. I wear clothes with graphic designs often representing hearts and lips to show I am flirty and loving. Now tell me more about your personality, I can incorporate hip-hop in your style, but I need to know more of your personality." Jeiel explained.
I shrugged. I could tell Jeiel was getting impatient.
"Well this is what I think your personality is, I think that you are tough and protective. I believe that you are strong, and responsible. I also believe you have this soft, family-oriented side to yourself." Jeiel finished. I nodded in approval.
"Okay, I would hate to use up my shopping budget for this week, but this is a fashion crisis! To the mall!" Jeiel exclaimed.
I took the Geep and drove to the mall with Jeiel, and 2D. 2D had to come in order to enforce Jeiel's spending limits.
"This is stupid." Jeiel said crossing her arms in the passenger seat. I looked in the front-view mirror and found 2D smiling meanly.
"If you back out my demands, then I get 'ta back out on yours." 2D said gleefully. Jeiel stayed silent, arms still crossed, and her teeth clenched with fury. I was a bit irritated with 2D. I mean he had a girlfriend that actually gave a fuck about his well-being and he was being an ass because he couldn't take a drag.
Once at the mall, Jeiel looked around with her finger to her chin, she was thinking on what store had the most Russel.
2D stop there with his arms crossed, "Do you want to hear what your spending limits are?" Asking with a sly smile.
"Tell me the limits." She grumbled.
"No more than $50." 2D told Jeiel harshly. Jeiel winced at this news.
"This is the mall! A hot dog here costs $50!" She exasperated. Jeiel walked away, leading us angrily to a store.
"It's okay Jeiel, I can pay for myself." I explained to her. She sighed then we continued walking to a store. I spent quite a lot of time trying on clothes. I tried on a strange green and purple polo, which Jeiel rejected, I also put on a polka-dotted red tie that she also rejected. I put on a pink cowboy hat which went into the reject pile as well. This is how things continued. I tried on so many things that I thought I had put on the whole damn store's inventory. Finally, we found some outfits that Jeiel said, "Matched my personality".
After I bought the new outfits, I put on my favorite. Some ripped jeans, and combat boots. My shirt was dark green with a huge graphic design of a smiley emoticon on it. After that, it was about lunch time and we sat on a bench eating greasy, mall pretzel's together.
"Well we have made good progress today." Jeiel said between bites. "Next is flirting." She continued. I gave her a nervous look.
"Are you teaching him how to get girls?" 2D asked.
"Yes I am." Jeiel said. 2D sat back and observed the mall.
"Okay, now you can pick any girl in this mall, as long as shes close in age with you and is single." Jeiel said.
"Yeah, I kinda got that." I replied.
"Okay so, girls don't like it when you ask them out first thing, so you should compliment them and make small talk. Don't be nervous, be yourself. If the girl's personality it a close one to yours, then she'll be intrigued with the conversation." Jeiel instructed me. I nodded, finishing my pretzel.
"Alright, it's go time, find a girl." Jeiel said excitedly.
I made my way to a cute cashier. She had red hair, green eyes with bright orange glasses and looked bored.
"Hi, there." I said shyly.
"May I help you?" She asked unimpressed.
"I just wanted to say, that your glasses are pretty cool." Then I started to walk away.
"Wait!" Orange Glasses called to me, "Thanks." she said. I continued to walk away. I felt nervous.
"What are you doing, that was good." Jeiel said to me as I walked back over to her in shame. I shook my head.
"Nah, I don't think shes my type, bad attitude." I said faltering towards the end of the sentence.
"Okay, well there are plenty more girls out there." Jeiel said optimistically.
It was hopeless. I spent hours trying to flirt with girls. They either didn't like me, or were bored, or didn't like my personality because I kept flirting, each time I got a little more awkward and shy. Things were not getting any better. I was exhausted and humiliated.
"Let's go, I 'fink that's 'nough for today." 2D said. I sighed.
"Okay, yeah lets go, I just need a little pick me up." I said then began walking walking to the food court.
I decided to just get a hotdog.
"Free sample?" Came a voice from behind me. I turned around to see a tan girl with black hair in two braids and brown eyes. She seemed to have a bit of an southern drawl. In her hands she held a platter with mini hotdogs in it.
"Don't mind if I do." I said and grabbed some, not caring if I seemed rude. I was surprised, usually girls would be revolted by my rudeness, but she giggled instead.
"Don't it suck when you got a hankerin' for a good hotdog and their just too expensive." She asked me. I nodded, swallowing the mini-dogs then continuing.
"Yes, ugh, today has just been exhausting." I said then sat down at a table. She followed me and sat across.
"My name's Darla." Darla told me.
"Russel." I said.
"Pleasure 'ta meet ya, Russel." Darla said sweetly.
"So you work here?" I asked her.
"Well I certainly don't go walking about with mini hotdogs in my hands for nothin'." She teased. From behind Darla, I saw 2D motion me to go when Jeiel elbowed him and whispered something in his ear. Darla noticed my staring and looked behind herself.
"Those are my friends. The pink one is Jeiel. The one with the lack of teeth, blue hair, and black eyes, is 2D, he's a singer in this band I am in..." I said but Darla cut me off.
"You're in a band?" Darla asked.
I nodded. "Yeah, I'm the drummer. I enjoy hip-hop and such." I then sighed remembering the NDFR (New Drums For Russel Foundation) I had used most of my money today buying clothes.
"What's wrong?" Darla asked me.
"I just wanted some new drums, and I kinda spent all of my money today." I said.
"Well I should be gettin' back to work now." She said then waved me goodbye with a friendly smile. I walked back to 2D and Jeiel.
"Who was she?" Jeiel asked bright eyed.
"That was Darla." I said.
"Get a number?" 2D asked. I shook my head headed to the Geep, Jeiel and 2D following me.
"Well its okay you didn't get a number. Just think, there are plenty more girls out..." Jeiel had been going on but I tuned her out. I didn't mean to, I was just thinking about Darla. I couldn't help remembering her cute little freckles that surrounded her cheeks.