Scene: Inside Rosalina's Observatory
Rosalina: And the little doggy says...
Lumas: Arf, arf, roof!
Rosalina: What do the Gorilla do?
Apricot Luma: Beat on his beat-box!
Rosalina: "Beat-box?"
Red Luma: Yes mama. That's their bodies, beat-boxes 'cause they are breakin' boxes!
Rosalina and Lumas: *laughing and giggling*
Outside: My golly! Home outside Earth? It's impossible to live out here but it's, so breathtaking! Oh my gosh! A comet!
Rosalina: Unwanted tourist are welcomed. Please come in.
Enter Noel
Yellow Luma: Welcome.
Red Luma: Git out!
Noel: S-sorry to intrude but, a friend of yours told me y-you are full of wisdom so...I need help real bad.
Red Luma: GIT, OUT!
Noel: YIPE!
Red Luma: That's right. Yipe yo ass on out then.
Yellow Luma: What's "ass" momma?
Rosalina: Don't mind him. He's the hot head that hate strangers; wait until you become a grown healthy planet to know that my yellow child.
Red Luma: Young, Mrs. Young Blondie, I know the first go round always fail but I'm pretty damn sure I elucidated when I said "GIT THE FUCK OUT!" HOP YOUR TRASH-SHORT DRESS ASS OFF OUR HOME AND BECOME A DAMN METEORITE WIT YO HUNCHBACK ASS!
Rosalina: RED!
(Me: America! Who is this sore-bastard?! If he dare assault Peach like a' that, my she will...wroo baby! carry on.)
Noel: S-sorry f-f...WAAAAAAAAAAH! WHY DO BIG STARS HATE ME?! WHAT DID I DO TO ANGER Y'ALL?!
Noel Exits
Rosalina: You have five seconds to apologize or you will get a lava spankin' from your mommy dearest.
Red Luma: Hell no! Fuck you!
Green Luma: Umm, don't do that.
Apicot Luma: Man you already did a lot.
Black Luma: Man yo ass is 'bout to be tolled bra!
Gray Luma: Toll his booty!
Rosalina: Hmm. Wow. Okay.
Scene: Outside Rosalina's Observatory
Inside: AHHHHH STOP!-WHO TAUGHT YOU TO TRADUCE LIKE THAT HUH?! ANSWER!-NO ONE MOMMY!-YOU TAUGHT YOURSELF TO BE DISRESPECTFUL?!-TOLL HIS ASS!-BOOTY! TOLL, HIS, ASS!-BOOTY! – Y'ALL WANNA BE NEXT?!-NO MA'AM!
(Me: Tear his ass a' up! That brat needs to know his place and that's playin' a child's role! America, if you have kids, this will be a good time to wroop their asses just for the hell of it!)
Enter Mu(Her dark conscious; only Noel can hear and see her)
Mu: Pathetic. Disappear like he said, hop off and perish.
Noel: GET OUT! GET OUT! GET AAAAAAAAAAAH-OUT!
Mu: No. I'm you, your ultimate potential to set life right. Nintendo can't help you alien; the only reason "that man" hates you is because you're feeble and always feel sorry for yourself; only I can be of guidance. Just morph into me. Let me make you happy. Let me show and teach you life and it's benefits.
Noel: Leave me ALONE! I'm, not, evil! You're ratchet! GET OUT PLEASE!
Mu: Oh so I'm that self-righteous lion from "Ratchet & Clank?"
Noel: What?! NO! YOU'RE WRETCHED AND CORRUPTED! I'M A GOOD GIRL!
Mu: And you'll still be, just under my control. Think about it. Everyone that hates your mere guts will crumble! STOP BEING A *beep* AND RELEASE ME!
Noel: I never cursed in my life but your ass is pushin' it!...Wroops.
Mu: There we go. Let me absorb negativity. Either way it goes, I will take over you and faith will make sure of it! WORLD DEMISE SHALL COME!
Inside: I'm terribly sorry about that Luma but if you're still out there, please come back in. Like Earth, space have chaotic weather conditions. I been out here long enough so yeah; Earth is nothing compared to out here soldier...I think you're one?
Mu: You go on in there and let her waste your precious time. Of all the universes you picked "Nintendo." Just pathetic.
Noel: I-I love Mario and Kirby.
Mu: Kids shit! You need to play some real games like "Mortal Kombat," "Asura's Wrath," God of War," and other rated M crap!
Noel: I'M A GIRL!
Mu: No more! You're an amazon, a warrior princess that's going to sing a lullaby to this miserable world! WAH-HA-HA-HA-HAAA!
Exits Mu
(Me: Man that's one evil broad. America, can I borrow your artillery and snipe this bitch?! Like a' tanka this demon!)
Noel: I'm not Lady Macbeth! I'm not the three witches from "Macbeth!" They all got hard faces! They all got mustaches! They all got beards! They all got goatees! Mines is soft and hair free!
(Me: TELL EM'!)
Scene: Inside Rosalina's Observatory
Enter Noel
Noel: Um hey...Rosalina.
Rosalina: Ah. From Mario I presume?
Noel: Eh?! Wra-wra...
Rosalina: He had that same paper when I first met him. You know, Bowser kidnap Peach gig, but this time he took it to space and brought terror upon my home and planets. But, are you okay sweety? You need some tea?
Noel: Um, well see...
Rosalina: I'm harmless. I'll be back, I think that Luma got you palled up in fear.
Rosalina Exits
Noel: But. Ummm.
Mu:"the only reason "that man" hates you is because you're feeble and always feel sorry for yourself! Of all the universes you picked "Nintendo." Just pathetic."
Noel: H-help me. Get this demon out of me and that man away from me.
Enter Rosalina
Rosalina: There you go sweety.
Noel: Where's the stars?
Rosalina: You shot them to bed because...
Noel: Eh?
Rosalina: As I was punishing dirty mouth, you was growling to yourself pretty loud and viciously; hence you scared them to bed. If you're a possessed person, sorry. I can't cleanse evil that's within you. If you came for so, then you must be on your way. Giga Bowser was terrifying enough.
Noel: NO PLEASE! I CAME HERE FOR WISDOM! NOT FREEDOM!
Rosalina: So you are off!
Noel: PLEASE DON'T GO!
Rosalina: Ow!
Noel: LIFE! I WANT TO KNOW HOW TO LIVE LIFE! THIS MAN AND WOMAN ARE HAUNTIN' ME DOWN! THEIR MALICIOUS SAYINGS KEEPS COMIN' BACK AND BACK!
?: "So you dare reject a god that can protect you from any and everything?! Bitch! I can even grant you eternal life! Man your dumb vacuous ass needs a beat down of knowledge. BITCH YOU'RE THAT RETARTED TO RUN! NOW IT'S SEVERE WHORE! NOW TELL ME YOU'RE A PRETTY DUMB BITCH!"
Noel: NOOOOOOO! NOOOOOOO! STAAAAAAAAAAAAAOP! "I'M PRETTY DAMN DUMB!"
Rosalina: OKAY! OKAY! You're squashing my stomach! I guess this is nadir. I'll tell you what I know. Just let go; you watered the garden well enough and made it skinner.
Noel: S-s-sorry. You s-still have your tu-tummy.
Rosalina: Yeah I guess. You have a pretty harsh way of pleading though. I don't understand what's going on, but you're facing abuse. The only advice I can give is face your fears; don't back down; face it with courage; don't involve fright. Evil feeds on fear and miscellaneous elements in relation; you know, oppression and depression that you're deeply in. I'm not telling you to take them out physically, but find a way to make them feel bad and make them rue their horror festival.
Noel: Thank y-you. You're the first to tell me not to break their neck.
Rosalina: Well if all fails, slay them demons.
Noel: I'm not that kind of woman!
Rosalina: Baby, there's so much you can take. Playing Ms. Nice has limits. Looking at you, you will black out and anything can happen when black takes over. You look quiet and humble; that means you're deadly when someone endangers you.
Noel: Wra? No! I'm not bipolar! I'm harmless and rather handle shit through talking!
Rosalina: Words are nothing to evil.
Noel: BITCH! Sorry, but I'm about to cuss your ass out!
Rosalina: Well, you're still a callow teen learning the way. The truth hurts but you will share the same punishment if you dare try me! Make an attempt! Move them lips! Shadow out a word!
Noel: ...Sorry m-madam. See y-ya!
Noel Exits
Rosalina: Wroo, these younglings are something. If the past booms in, they will understand how to property live life; the hard way. They got it easy.
(Me: Yes they do. America, they wouldn't last a fuckin' day in slavery! We died for these bastards to enjoy everything they got! A-LOT OF US, died for them! SHOW A' US RESPECT!)
Scene: Outside Rosalina's Observatory
Yoshi: Yo Boshi.
Boshi: Yea dog.
Yoshi: "Shawty said the *beep* that she with ain't shit. Shawty said the *beep* that she with ain't this. Shawty said the *beep* that she with can't hit. But shawty I'ma hit it, hit it like I can't miss."
Boshi: Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
(Me: Hell no America! Them wanna be gangstas always come at a' wrong timer with their nasty ass raps! What am I gonna do with them Yoshis? Just carry on.)
Noel: W-well I'm not meat! WHAT DO Y'ALL KNOW?!
Boshi: Oh-oh man. She love her man.
Yoshi: Let's go before she snipe our *beep* off up close! Extraction swag!
Yoshi & Boshi Exits. Enter Mu.
Mu: Well done. More power to you.
Noel: SHUT UP! I KNOW YOU'RE HAPPY!
Mu: I can't complement you?!
Noel: YOU'RE NOT IN CONTROL!
Mu: JUST SHOVE HOME AND LET ME OUT!
Noel: NO! I want to know life from these people. They have some knowledge about it.
Mu: Well waste your fucking time. No matter how much you learn, we'll prevail.
Mu Exits
Noel: AGH! LIFE WHY?!...why...
(Me: And Ms. NOL leaves the space station for more help. Will she ever confront these brutes America?)
(Peach: Baby, Sweet Bowser came back. HELP!)
(Me: Think about that America. Them sweet potatoes are a' beggin' for the return of butter man. "LET'S A GO!")
Camera fades away
Extra Scene(Optional)
Noel: "I'm not bipolar!" I'm a talk woman!
Rosalina: I didn't call you crazy.
Noel: Yes you did!
Rosalina: All I'm trying to tell you is even the innocent loses it.
Noel: NOT ME! "Bipolar?!" Really?!
Rosalina: "Talk woman." What is that?
Noel: A talk woman is a girl that wroops ass through mouth and words; which is what I'm doin' to you!
Enter three singers with a jazzy Christmas melody
Singer 1: Talk woooooman will tear dat ass uhhhhhhhhhhup!(repeat)
Singer 2: Talk woooooman will eat yo ass daaaaaaahown!(repeat)
Singer 3: Talk woooooman will swerve yo ass oooooooooooon!(repeat)
Rosalina: *Ahem.*
Noel: No keep signin'!
Rosalina: Seriously, I'm about to forget my script.
Noel: Prepare for a talk down of justice!
Singer 2: Talk wooooooman will take down big laaaaaaaaaaaaass!(repeat)
Singer 1: Talk wooooooman killed this bitch coooooooooooooold!(repeat)
Singer 3: Talk wooooooman's chicken is coooooooooooooold!(repeat)
Rosalina: Okay. Cut! Cut that shit out! MARIO!
Me: Okay okay a' cuta!
Noel: No Mario! Let them sing! They sound ace.
Rosalina: The hell they do! Mario SHUT THEM UP!
Me: I a' got you big Peach!
All singers: AHHHHHHHHHH-HO-HEEEEEEEEE! AH, HO-HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!(repeat)
Me: Now that's harmonization at it's a' best!
Enter Link
Link: Eh-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! BIIIII BEEEEEEEE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...
Singers Exit
Me: Mama mia!
Noel: Huh? Who is this dress man...oh so this is what medieval knights wore huh?
Rosalina: No honey. That's what you call scary.
Noel: That man can hold that.
Me: My kinda zeta!
Camera ends the noise and shuts off