CHAPTER TWO

The next day came far too slowly for Harry's likening. As he walked into King's Cross Station he spotted Ron and Hermione, waiting for him to go onto the platform. "You coming?" he said to them as he approached the barrier between platform nine and ten.

When he got on the other side of the platform, Hermione pointed towards a group of girls and said, "You ready Harry? She is over there."

"Harry, mate, why are you doing this? You can't ask her out," Ron said in a failed attempt to change Harry's mind.

"Ron, drop it, you can't try to stop me, I am asking her out whether you like it or not. I didn't try to stop you asking Hermione out, did I?" Harry asked.

"But it's different," Ron argued.

"No, it's not," Harry said as he walked towards the group of girls.

Harry's heart was pounding as he approached Ginny Weasley, Luna Lovegood and a group of fifth year girls. "Luna," Harry said to the girl with big blue eyes and long dirty blonde hair, "Can I have a word?"

"Sure," Luna said cheerfully, leading Harry over towards the train, "What is it?"

"Luna, I don't know how to say this, but, well, it's just, I've been feeling this way for a while now, but-"

"Spit it out Harry," Luna interrupted.

"Um, would, you, maybe, possibly, consider, being, being my girlfriend?" Harry finished in a rush.

"Yeah, ok," Luna said, taken aback.

Harry took a deep breath. "Come on, let's go find a compartment." He said taking her hand.

They reached the last compartment, and Harry held the door open for Luna. They went to go inside, but the scene that awaited them inside, stopped them dead in their tracks. They found Draco Malfoy, stroking a big green apple, mouthing the words "I love you" and kissing its smooth skin.

"Well isn't this … nice?" said Luna with an air of mild surprise.

"It-it-it's not what it looks like," stuttered Draco.

"What," Harry started, "it looks like to me is, Draco Malfoy is having an affair with an apple."

"Ok, ok, it is what it looks like, but if you tell anyone Potter, and I mean anyone, I-I-I'll, I'll-"

"What? Stutter at me?" Harry snorted.

"No, I'll tell everyone you're going out with Loony Lovegood," retorted Malfoy.

"Oi-"Luna started, but Harry cut across her.

"You do that," said Harry, grasping Luna's hand.

"What? You mean?" Draco gasped.

"Yes, Luna and I are a couple," Harry said simply.

"What's this all about?" Ron asked, as he and Hermione walked into the compartment.

"Malfoy's having a secret love affair with an apple," Harry said.

"Well, Potter's going out with Loony Lovegood," Malfoy retorted.

"Harry, that's wonderful!" Hermione squealed, "I told you-"Hermione stoped in her tracks, "hold on, what did you say about Malfoy?"

"He's having a love affair with an apple, aren't you Draco?" Harry said.

"I-I-I, um, well, you see," Malfoy started, "Fine, yes I am having an affair with an apple."

Hermione and Ron burst out in fits of laughter.

"I thought you and Luna was the worst relationship that could have been Harry! But this tops it!" Ron laughs.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Malfoy demanded.

"It's, just, I mean Malfoy, why couldn't you find a girl, a human one, to have an affair with, why an apple?" Ron asked.

"Because, Weasley," Malfoy began rather fiercely, "no one understands me like my apple."

Hermione couldn't contain herself any longer and she let out a snort of laughter. "Seriously Malfoy, it sounds as if you asked one girl out and she said no, so you went and bought yourself an apple."

Malfoy shifted uncomfortably in his set.

"You did, didn't you Malfoy? You have to tell us EVERYTHING, or we will tell the WHOLE school you are dating an apple," Ron demanded.

"Ok, well, it was one day over the summer, when I was sitting there, just staring at an apple, thinking, wow, green apples are just so green, and shiny, and smooth. Then I just, I don't know, I started stroking it, and it sort of just happened. We are perfect for each other. I love her and I will never eat her and I will never let anything happen to her," Malfoy said with a dreamy expression on his face.

Luna let out a sigh, and everyone looked at her.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Luna began "I was just thinking how much I would like to see Harry with no clothes on."

"Um – Ok, well, I think we should leave Malfoy and his apple alone and go and find another compartment." Harry said rather awkwardly.